by Menon, David
‘ Ian! Ian! You mustn’t lose consciousness, now come on!’ He looked around and called out even though he could only see a couple of faces looking down from windows. Then he turned back to his lover. He couldn’t let him slip away. ‘ Ian! Come back to me! Ian! Ian!’
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
The prime minister came out of 10 Downing Street to address the waiting throng of reporters.
‘ Today, an attempt was made on the life of the Irish prime minister whilst he was visiting the Irish community in Manchester. I’m very pleased to say that the Taoiseach who is a great friend of this country and a personal friend of mine with whom I’ve spent many years trying to negotiate a peace agreement in Northern Ireland, is unharmed and is now safely back in Dublin. I spoke to him on the telephone just a few moments ago and he, and indeed so do I, would like to thank our security services who through their diligence and dedication managed to avoid something dreadful from happening.
On a darker note, both the Taoiseach and I wish to express our sympathy and condolences to the family of Peter Irvine, leader of the True Unionists, who was murdered this morning in a terrorist outrage at George Best Belfast City airport. Peter was a tireless defender of the rights of his community and though he and I didn’t always see eye to eye on the issues affecting Northern Ireland, I had the greatest respect for a man who worked as hard as he did on behalf of the people he represented.
What both of these events symbolise is that, just like in Iraq, there are people out there who wish to destroy everything that we’re doing to build a constructive future for the people of Northern Ireland. But let me give them notice here and now that they’re not going to succeed. The people of Northern Ireland will get the future that they so badly deserve, not despite of the tragic events of today, but because they make our determination that much stronger. There will be a shared future for the people of Northern Ireland, the newly devolved assembly will succeed within a framework of mutual respect and understanding. The cowards who committed both atrocities today will never achieve their objectives. Northern Ireland is a very different place from what it was just a few years ago and it’s never going to go back. Thank you’.
The nurses at Hope hospital in Salford were so good to them. Mark wouldn’t leave Ian’s side and they managed to put a foldaway bed in the room in the intensive care unit where they were keeping him. He’d been unconscious for almost three days. Mark was going out of his mind with worry. Simon and Anne had been in and sat with him for hours, so had both sets of Mark’s grandparents but he wasn’t surprised that Lynne hadn’t even rung him to see how Ian was doing. Selfish control freaks like her never like to hear home truths and though it was sad to lose a friend he stood by what he’d said to her. The men who worked for Ian as well as his rugby mates had all sent messages of support but the doctor wouldn’t let anyone else see Ian until his condition had improved.
All night long he’d turned over and over in his bed. He found it hard to take his eyes away from watching Ian. He could only just bear to watch him lying there wired up to a machine that was monitoring the functions of his body. He watched and waited for any slight movement of Ian's fingers, his hands, his eyes. He’d hardly eaten anything and was surviving on endless cups of coffee. Everybody said he was going to make himself ill and had pleaded with him to go home and get some rest. But he’d refused. He couldn’t leave Ian. He had to be there for when he did come out of it.
His eyes were still closed but he was aware that the sun was beginning to shine through the edges of the curtains. He could hear the hospital springing to life down the corridors and in the wards. He’d been drifting in and out of what he wouldn’t call sleep and felt like shit. Then he heard something, a murmur, then a groan, then another groan that was louder than the first, then a pitiful calling of his name.
‘ Mark?’
He opened his eyes wide and leapt out of bed.
' Ian! I'm here, I'm right here!'
Mark buzzed for the nurse and she came rushing in followed by the doctor. He then stood back and let them see to Ian. They were the professionals and they had a job to do. Then when the doctor turned and told him that Ian was out of danger, his vital signs were all looking good, he’d be physically weak for a while but would gain his strength back in time, Mark realised that he’d been holding himself in as if his bones would fall into a pile on the floor. He stepped out of the room, slumped down on a chair in the corridor and began to weep with relief that Ian was going to be alright.
He looked up to see his sister-in-law Anne standing there.
‘ I called in on the off chance’ she said before sitting down next to him and taking him in her arms. ‘ The nurse told me he’s awake. It’s such good news’.
‘ I couldn’t have lost him, Anne’ Mark whimpered. ‘ It would’ve been the end of me’.
‘ Well thank God you haven’t lost him then’ said Anne, stroking Mark’s head as he rested it on her shoulder. ‘ I’m so relieved for you’.
‘ Not half as much as I am for myself’.
‘ Are you going to tell me the truth now?’
‘ What do you mean?’
‘ I know the story you’ve told to everybody’ said Anne ‘ But me and Simon think there’s more to it’.
‘ You don’t half pick your moments’.
‘ Mark, that’s not fair. We’re worried about you. We’re your family and we’re worried about what you’ve got yourself into. Was Ian in some kind of trouble?’
The story everybody had been told was that Ian had given evidence against a gang of paramilitaries in Northern Ireland years ago and that the leader of the gang had come after him when he’d been released from prison. None of that was actually untrue but they didn’t know that Mark had killed Campbell. Everybody thought that Ian had done that in self-defence.
‘ Anne, Ian is one of the good guys and that’s all you need to know’.
‘ Mark, a man is dead’.
‘ Yes, and I … I wouldn’t waste any time praying for his soul. Why can’t you trust me?’
‘ I do trust you …
‘ … well prove it and back off’.
‘ You can’t blame us for being worried, Mark’ Anne pleaded.
‘ Maybe not’ Mark conceded. ‘ But you don’t need to be worried. I’ve got everything under control’.
It was a while later when the doctor said that Mark could go back in. They’d placed a couple more pillows on Ian’s bed and raised his head up so that he could see around him. His eyes lit up when he saw Mark walk in the room.
‘ Welcome back, handsome’ said Mark, taking hold of Ian’s hand. ‘ You had me worried there. You’d lost so much blood. How do you feel?’
‘ Pretty groggy’ said Ian. ‘ All the better for seeing you though. How long was I out of it?’
‘ Nearly three days. It’s Tuesday today. I was scared, Ian. I was really scared you wouldn’t make it’.
‘ More scared than out there with Campbell?’
‘ It doesn’t even compare’ said Mark.
‘ Mark, about what happened … ‘
‘ … don’t Ian’ said Mark, placing his hand on Ian’s chest. ‘ Don't ask me to regret it because I don't. I’d do exactly the same again if someone was threatening your life’.
‘ But … ‘
‘ … look, no buts’ said Mark. ‘ Life can throw whatever it likes at us, big man, and we’ll just bat it straight back again’.
Ian smiled affectionately at his lover. ‘ You’re mad, do you know that? And no matter what you say I don’t deserve to be on the receiving end of your smile. But when this is all over we are going to have the best life together’.
‘ I’m going to hold you to that’ said Mark. ‘ But listen, you mustn’t tire yourself out now. You’ve only just come round’.
‘ There are things we need to talk about though, Mark’.
‘ I know‘
‘ What did Alice say about what happened?’
‘ She
knows it was me who shot Campbell’ said Mark. ‘ You’d gone unconscious when she got to us and she worked it out by the look on my face. You see, she knew the gun was yours because she saw it when I was sitting in her car. Then when the shot rang out she didn’t try and stop me when I leapt out of the car and ran down the street to look for you’.
‘ I don’t understand?'
‘ She was proving a point by letting me run off with your gun. She thinks I’ve got what it takes to go and work for her’.
‘ And you’re tempted? I can see you are from the look on your face but don’t be seduced by what you think might be exciting, Mark. I’ve no right to stand in the way of whatever it is you want to do but you’ve got to think about it very, very carefully. It’s not just a job you’d be taking on’.
‘ I know, big man, I know, but it wouldn’t be the same as what you’ve been doing for them’.
‘ You’d still have to be prepared to kill’
‘ I’ve done it once, Ian and I did it for justifiable reasons’.
‘ I don’t believe I’m hearing this’.
‘ Alice has been here a couple of times and we’ve talked. She’s setting up a surveillance unit to monitor the activities of people who go about some very dubious business that the public need protecting from’.
‘ Mark, the word surveillance has a very wide meaning when it comes to these people’.
‘ I realise that, Ian’.
‘ I know what you said before but have you made your final decision?’
‘ No. No, I haven’t’.
‘ Then I’ve got time’.
‘ Ian, there’s other things we need to talk about but they can wait’.
‘ No’ said Ian ‘ Hit me with the lot right now. Campbell told me about Natalie. Is it true? She’s my daughter?’
This was going to be one of the hardest things Mark had ever had to do or was likely to have to do in the future.
‘ It is true, big man. Natalie was your daughter’.
‘ Was?’
‘ She’s dead, Ian. I’m sorry’.
Ian put his hand to his eyes. ‘ Ah Jesus. How?’
‘ You’re not going to like this’ said Mark ‘ They found her body on some waste ground just outside Salford. She’d been shot, Ian. Alice said it looked like a contract killing’.
Ian now had tears in his eyes. ‘ But who? Who would do that?’
‘ The word on the street back in Belfast is that her mother ordered it’.
‘ Angela? Her own mother for God’s sake? Where is Angela now? Have they arrested her?’
‘ Angela is dead too, Ian. She was in a car bomb with Peter Irvine’.
‘ I never loved Angela’ said Ian, his tears still flowing but for the daughter he never knew, not for his former lover. ‘ I knew she was in love with me and I used that as cover so that the rest of the Ulster Defenders wouldn’t cotton on that I was gay. We had sex a few times and … Jesus, what a spineless shit I was’.
‘ Don’t go blaming yourself, Ian. You didn’t even know that Angela was pregnant’.
‘ For fuck’s sake, what a mess’.
‘ I can’t imagine why a mother would order the death of her own daughter, Ian, but Angela did. And if there’s any kind of justice she’ll be paying for it now’.
It had been a week but Ian still wasn’t well enough to be released from hospital yet. He was on his feet more each day and the team looking after him were pleased with his progress, but he still had to spend most of the time in bed.
‘ I’m going to go home and bring us in some more stuff, big man’ said Mark.
‘ Have you taken leave from the bank?’
‘ They’ve been really good’ said Mark ‘ They said I could take as long as I need and Dr. Khan says we’ll be here another week or so’.
Mark looked up and saw that Ian was regarding him shrewdly. ‘ What?’
‘ Never mind Dr. Khan’ said Ian. He raised his finger. ' You're up to something'.
‘ I am not. And don't you know it's rude to point'.
‘ You’ve been looking at your watch all morning. What’s going on?’
‘ God, I could never have an affair, could I? You’d be able to see it written all over my face’.
‘ Yes and then my fist would be written all over his’.
‘ Well let’s just say I’ve got a nice surprise for you’ said Mark. ‘ See you later’.
Mark waited in the arrivals hall of Terminal 3 at Manchester airport. The screen on the wall said that the flight from Belfast had landed and ‘baggage in hall’. Good, thought Mark. She’d be through any minute.
‘ Let me take your bag for you’ said Mark. She looked like any other woman of her age. She was dressed in a pair of jeans with a plain white shirt, high heeled boots and a cream coloured raincoat. She didn’t wear much make-up and her hair was straight down to her shoulders. There was an anxious look in her eyes that didn’t surprise Mark in the least. This wasn’t a normal situation.
‘ No, you’re alright’ she said, nervously. ‘ I can manage’.
‘ No really, let me’ said Mark, holding out his hand. ‘ My mother would turn in her grave if I didn’t even offer to carry a lady's bag’.
She smiled appreciatively. ‘ Well, if you want’.
They walked along the footbridge between the terminal building and the car park. Mark was using Ian’s car and he paid the charge before leading her to it. He was quite nervous too. He thought Ian would be pleased but there was still that slither of doubt. He might think he’d meddled a bit too far.
‘ Did you have a good flight?’
‘ It was a bit bumpy on the way down what with all the wind and rain’ she said ‘ I just had to close my eyes and pray’.
‘ You’re a nervous flyer?’
‘ A bit’ she admitted. ‘ But I’d be even more nervous of being on the sea in weather like that’.
Mark drove out of the car park and took the lane leading him to the M56 heading into the centre of Manchester. He’d head west when he got to the M57 towards Salford and the hospital.
‘ Have you ever been to Manchester before?’ Mark asked.
She chuckled. ‘ No. The closest I’ve ever got is watching Coronation Street’.
‘ Well we’ll pass the studios soon’ said Mark.
‘ I was very surprised to get your call’ she said. ‘ How did you find me?’
‘ I just went through the phone book and was glad you weren’t ex-directory’ said Mark ‘ I guess it must have come as something of a shock, if that’s not the understatement of the century. I felt sick with nerves when I dialled the number I can tell you’.
‘ I’ve booked myself into a B and B for tonight’ she said. ‘ It’s in somewhere called Eccles. Do you know it? They said it’s handy for Hope hospital’.
‘ I know it but you’ll do no such thing’ said Mark ‘ You’re Ian’s mother and I’ve made you up a bed at ours in the spare room’.
‘ You seem like a very kind young man, Mark’.
‘ I just try to do what I think is right, Mrs. Laurence. No fuss. Just get on with it’.
‘ Even so, it can’t have been easy for you with everything’s that’s happened’.
‘ Mrs. Laurence, I’ve only had to deal with all this for the last few weeks since I met your son. You’ve had to deal with it all for the last twenty years. Compared to you I’ve had a walk in the park’.
‘ Well I don’t know about that but Mark, please call me Pat’.
Mark smiled. ‘ Ok then. Pat’
When they got to the hospital Mark asked their special visitor to stay back for a minute whilst he went into Ian’s room to prepare the big surprise.
‘ Ah, the mystery man returns’ said Ian. ‘ So what’s the story morning glory?’
‘ How are you feeling?’ Mark asked.
‘ Suspicious’.
‘ Then I think I should put you out of your misery’.
Mark went down to the lounge area whe
re she was waiting by the coffee machine. She looked up and saw Mark standing there and stood for a moment to catch her breath. Then she followed him back to where Ian was sitting up in his bed looking a bit anxious and bewildered. When he saw the woman walking in with Mark he immediately recognised her and the tears welled up in his eyes.
‘ Mum?’
‘ Hello, son’ said Pat Laurence, her own tears falling down her cheeks. ‘ You said you’d see me later. I didn’t think you meant twenty years later’.
Mark switched on the small television in Ian’s room and propped himself up next to Ian on his bed. ‘ The Bill’ was about to start. It was one of their favourites. Simon and Anne had taken Ian’s Mum into Manchester for something to eat so the boys had the evening to themselves.
' You must be so pleased your sister called’ said Mark.
Ian’s face broke out into a beaming smile. ‘ Our Claire? You could say that, yeah. She’s coming over next week with my two nieces'.
' Oh Ian that's fantastic news' said Mark. ' Slowly but surely it's all piecing back together'.
' Thanks to you' said Ian ' I'll never be able to thank you enough for making that call to my Mum. You're worth your weight in gold so you are'.
' Ah no, you've got me all wrong. I'm a big shit really. But what about your Dad? Is he coming over too?'
Ian shook his head. ' He's still not interested'.
' Well' said Mark ' One step at a time, eh? Now tell me more about your nieces'.
' Jennifer is fourteen and Rachel in nine' said Ian, proudly. Claire is going to email me a couple of pictures tomorrow. She says Jennifer is absolutely sports mad'.
' Then she'll have to go down to her Uncle's rugby club'.
' What? Let an impressionable fourteen year old niece of mine loose amongst all that raging testosterone? You must be joking'.
Mark laughed. ' Going to play the big protective Uncle are you?’
‘ Too right with that lot’.
' You are funny' said Mark. ‘ And I love seeing the way your Mum is with you'.
Ian’s Mum had been walking around these last few days like she was a teenager in love with her first boyfriend, holding her son’s hand and smiling away proudly. There was no bitterness between them. Pat forgot and called him Duncan sometimes but that didn’t matter. They were just glad to be back with each other and determined never to be separated again. It all made Mark wish that he could be reunited with his own Mum and Dad. He'd thought about them so much over the past few days. He’d give anything to have them back.