by Aiden Frost
Shandra eyed her for a moment, skeptical. Before she could say anything, Amanda decided on a distraction. She wasn’t sure which topic was worse, talking about her silly dreams, or talking about Max Avery. “So, why do you think there’s something wrong with Max? Was he nice to someone?” Amanda snorted at her own joke. Max Avery was as far from his father as he could get. While Andrew Avery was a benevolent, amiable man, Max had a cocky air about him. He hadn’t made friends with a single person in the office in the entire last year he’d taken over his father’s position. The transition was abrupt, and she supposed the office was suffering from it.
“He is nice,” Shandra insisted. “And it’s because he left the office before nine this morning.”
Amanda drew her eyes to Shandra in a lazy manner, waiting for her to come up with a more significant argument than that. Amanda sipped at her iced tea, then said, “I’d leave the office too if I was the boss. It’s depressing in here. And crowded. And bright,” she said, looking up at the rows and rows of lighting running across the ceiling.
“But Max doesn’t,” Shandra argued.
“Okay...maybe he had something he needed to take care of. Or maybe he was finally getting a haircut.”
Shandra rolled her eyes at her. “Please, don’t try and pretend you don’t think the waves that are starting in his hair isn’t sexy.” Shandra eyed her while Amanda spent some time rearranging the vegetables in her salad. “I bet you grabbed onto that hair for dear life last night. I know I would have.”
Amanda’s head jerked up.
“Ha!” said Shandra. “Finally, a reaction. He’s delicious under those stiff work clothes, isn’t he?”
Amanda’s lip twitched but she resisted a smile. “Really delicious,” she muttered into her tea.
“So, you think you’ll see him again?”
Amanda’s eyebrows raised.
“I know, I know. It’s against your rules to see a man for a second time, but still, was it really that bad?”
Amanda leaned forward, her voice low. “It was...weird. He kept wanting to kiss me.”
Shandra’s hand flew to her lips, her mouth open in mock horror. “No!” she said.
“I knew you wouldn’t understand,” said Amanda. “You’ve probably got your eyes open for Prince Charming. Most days, I’d just be happy to find Charming. What is with guys these days anyway?” Amanda went on, missing the uncomfortable look on Shandra’s face. “Where’s the good ol’ days of opening doors and actually looking at a woman when she speaks to you? Do you have any idea how many times I’ve gone out with a man just to watch him watching every skirt that walked past the table?”
“Was Max like that?”
“Max? I don’t know. I didn’t give him a chance.”
“You jumped on him as soon as he pulled up to your house, didn’t you?”
Amanda looked around the room, as if really seeing it for the first time. “I hate being stuck inside on our lunch hour. It’s our free time, I mean, it’s not like we’re getting paid, but unless we want to brave the traffic or the people on the streets, we sit here. I wish we had a park close by.”
“Ummm, okay, yeah, that would be nice... Amanda, what did you do with Max?”
Amanda looked at her, uncertain. “I invited him inside.”
Shandra’s mouth fell open, yet this time it was in true shock. “You invited a man into your house? I thought that was rule number 272 or something?”
Amanda flinched. “I know. I don’t know what is wrong with me. I’ve been feeling...off lately.” She looked around the room, distracted. The cheerful Christmas music that pounded through the speakers was sending bundles of nerves up and down her chest. Amanda hated this time of year. She looked at Shandra, wondering if they even celebrated Christmas where she came from. She and Shandra had hit it off on her first day of orientation, and while they’d spent every lunchtime together since, they weren’t friends outside the office.
“Hey!” Shandra slammed her hand down on the table, rising to her full height. “Where’s my report, Aaron? You were supposed to have it to me by 12:30.”
Amanda watched as Aaron slunk around the tables. Although Shandra had forced quite a few eyes to her on her outburst, most were now back to their own conversations.
“It’s only 12:23 Ms Shandra, and I have it right here.” Shandra towered over him almost twelve inches in her heels. Aaron’s hand shook as he handed her the manila envelope. Shandra smiled—men quaking before her, just like she liked it.
“Good, boy,” she cooed, sending him on his way.
“Good Lord, Shandra, you’re going to give that poor boy a heart attack one day.” Amanda looked up. Max stood before them. He hadn’t gotten himself a haircut, and she tried not to imagine grabbing the soft waves in her hands as she had her way with him. Her heart quickened. She shouldn’t desire him. It must be nerves. But men don’t make her nervous she reminded herself. She busied herself with her salad, pushing the hard-boiled egg through the remaining dressing.
Shandra laughed, her voice light, yet booming. She demanded attention, and those who didn’t already have their eyes on her, now did. “He’s never had a late report though,” she said as she passed the envelope on to Max. “And that’s more than I can say about your assistant, Janice.”
Max shook his head at the mention of her name. It was a sore subject for him. He couldn’t get his own assistant to produce reports on time, yet Shandra could move people like they were her pawns. He eyed her, wondering if it would take him growing a set of legs like hers for people to respect him.
“Afternoon, Amanda,” he said when she glanced up at him. His voice was cool. He knew what she’d done was about getting information for his father. Her cheeks flared red and she busied herself with her meal. Her actions were in stark contrast to controlling role she’d played last night.
Shandra stood there, silent as Max walked away. She respected the man for taking on so much after his father got sick, although, she imagined, most people saw him as an entitled rich kid who was handed a business on a silver platter. The fact that his father was ill was something he kept tight under wraps. She suspected even Amanda didn’t know that bit of information. “Come on,” said Shandra, jarring Amanda from her daydream.
Amanda stood as commanded, looking dazed and in thought. “Where are we going?” she asked as Shandra walked away from the table.
“Out,” Shandra replied as they met at the trash can.
Amanda took one last pull on her tea, before wiping the container clean and placing it back into her bag. She hurried to keep up with Shandra and the quick pace of her long legs.
“It’s freezing outside,” complained Amanda as Shandra pushed open the doors to the outside. “I didn’t bring my coat.”
“Neither did I,” she said, raising her arms to the cool afternoon sky. She smiled and took off down the street. Shandra’s pace was so quick and confident on the pocked sidewalk, Amanda imagined she could run in her heels if she saw fit. Amanda quickened her stride to keep up with her.
“Sorry,” mumbled Amanda as her bag bumped into woman next to her. She was practically jogging to keep up. “Do you run?” she asked her.
“Run?” asked Shandra as she quickly perused the shops up ahead.
“Yeah.” Amanda moved behind her, allowing Shandra to part the wave of people for her. “Like do you run for fun?”
Shandra chuckled and a group of men standing on the street corner smiled at her approvingly. “I do run for fun,” she said. She suddenly slowed her pace and Amanda squeezed back up to walk at her side. Amanda was practically puffing after the vigorous jaunt they just went on. She patted Amanda lovingly on top her head. “I forget how little you are, since you’re so fierce with the men.” Shandra chuckled again as Amanda sulked.
“I’m not little,” she complained. “You’re just...really big.”
Shandra turned, stopped in the middle of the sidewalk. People swerved around them and she paid them no mind. Shandra
placed her hands on her hips, her full red lips pouting. “I’m not big,” she said.
“Shandra,” Amanda said, tugging on her arm to move her out of the line of pedestrians, “I promise, you’re just right.”
“Ah ha!” said Shandra, her voice booming. “I knew you had a keen eye for me!” She laughed good-naturedly, and then, when she was good and ready, she moved herself out of everyone’s way.
“You can’t just stand in everyone’s way,” Amanda admonished her.
“Why?” asked Shandra. “They move around me.” She waved her hand like she was a god referring to mere mortals.
“How do people bend to your will?” Amanda asked, amazed.
Shandra looked down to her, smiling, “Because I expect them to.” She pushed open the door to an office building, waving dismissively at the front receptionist who returned her gesture with a curt nod. Shandra continued down the hallway, past the office windows.
“Are we allowed to be here?” Amanda whispered. She looked around, nervous. A few people glanced up at them before returning to their work, but most ignored them.
Shandra entered a small break room before pushing open a solid metal door. There was a set of stairs that Shandra’s long legs allowed her to take two at a time. Amanda hustled up the stairs behind her. The thin, concrete hallway cooled as they reached the door at the top. Shandra fought with the handle a moment before pushing it open to the breezy afternoon air. Amanda walked out tentatively behind her.
“Wow.” The breath puffed out of her mouth in soft white wisps upon the cold air. She stood in the middle of the roof, turning in a circle. “I had no idea this was up here.”
“Beautiful, isn’t it?”
“How did you know this was here?” Amanda asked as she moved over to one of the sitting areas, with soft outdoor furniture, tables, and even electrical charging stations.
“Worked here for a little while,” said Shandra. “This rooftop is the only thing the place has going for it though.” Shandra plopped down in one of the nearby chairs, swinging her long, dark legs up onto the table. She acted as if she didn’t feel the cold air, although it didn’t altogether surprise Amanda that she seemed immune to the weather.
“We should have one of these,” said Amanda, running her hand along one of the miniature conifers.
“Why do you think I brought you here?”
“You should bring Max here,” Amanda said. “I mean, I don’t know if he even likes the outdoors, but there’s plenty of us at the office that does.”
“I doubt there’s money in the budget for a rooftop escape,” said Shandra. She watched Amanda mull this over in her head.
“Yeah,” she said, distant. “But the space to grow our own vegetables...” she grimaced, looking at Shandra. She expected some kind of look. Something that noted she thought Amanda was beneath her because her dreams involved vegetables, not climbing the ranks in the corporate world, but instead, Shandra was smiling. “What?” she asked, bashful.
“Why are you so closed off with me?”
Amanda looked at her, ashamed. “I’m not very good at sharing,” she admitted. “But, hey, I don’t know all that much about you either.”
“I’m an open book,” said Shandra spreading her arms.
Amanda looked at her. Looked at her perfect body and stylish clothes and confident manner. She knew Shandra came from an African country, and that’s because she heard it from somebody else. She didn’t even know if she had any brothers or sisters. She’d spent every day with this person for the last six months. No, Shandra was definitely hiding something. It’d taken her until now to realize it.
Shandra’s smile faltered as Amanda continued to look at her. But just like that, Amanda snapped out of it. If she started asking questions of Shandra, the questions would be reciprocated. And Amanda did not feel the need to share. She rubbed her hands up and down her arms, the pale skin of her hands burning a bright pink in the cold. “We need to go,” she said.
Shandra rose silently, leading the way to the doorway to the stairs. As her hand sat on the handle, she paused. “I brought you here because I thought this would be something you would care about. I thought this would be something that would fire a passion within you. Something you’d need and go after.” She turned the handle and pulled open the door. Amanda listened for a moment as Shandra’s heels echoed off the confined space. Then she followed silently behind her.
Chapter Four
AMANDA SAT SILENTLY at her desk. She’d thought nonstop about what Shandra meant about Amanda caring, finding something she was passionate about. Amanda was passionate about a lot of things. Her gardening. Her peace and quiet. Men. She puffed out a burst of air. This got Carter’s attention and he peered over the wall that divided their cubicles.
“What’s going on, jelly bean?” he asked.
Amanda looked at him, wrinkling her nose. “Do I look like a passionate person to you?”
Carter raised his eyebrows, before standing and leaning on the wall divider. “Have you gotten a complaint from one of your gentlemen suitors? ‘Cause I could give you some tips if you needed...”
“No, please, no,” said Amanda, waving her hand at him. “I am perfectly content thinking that you and Mrs Williams conceived your brood of children the good ol’ fashioned way. With the lights off and with no sounds or movement.”
Carter’s lip drew up in a look of amusement. “You think after all these years with my wife, I don’t know a thing or two about passion?”
“Please, Carter, please. I’m begging you. This is not a topic I wish to discuss with you. Ever.”
“Suit yourself.” Carter shrugged, suddenly indifferent to the conversation.
Amanda wanted to leave things at that, but before she knew it, she blurted, “I think Shandra meant I don’t care about things. Like that...” Amanda lowered her voice, conspiratorial, “I’m boring.”
Carter laughed, his paunchy stomach bouncing beneath his too snug shirt. “Is Shandra losing interest hearing about your hobbies?”
Amanda spun her chair away from her computer. She crossed her legs and leaned back. “Men are not a hobby, if that’s what you’re inferring.”
Carter leaned closer to her. “Seems like that’s what you spend the most time on.”
Even though Carter had stated this very matter of fact—no judgement, just an observer’s opinion—she was suddenly defensive. “I like other things,” she said.
“So, tell me,” said Carter.
“I...well, I like gardening.”
“See! Was that so hard?” Carter was silent, thinking a moment. “My favorite hobby is building models. It helps me relax.”
Amanda smiled. “I didn’t know that,” she said.
Carter shrugged. “Didn’t think anybody would be interested.”
“Well, I think that’s cool. I wouldn’t have the patience for such things.”
“And I have a black thumb.” Carter shrugged. “The missus gave up keeping houseplants years ago. She blamed their continued death on me, but I’m pretty sure she’s worse at keeping things alive than me.” He smiled, broadly. “But I was quite happy to allow her to think it was my fault.”
“Why?” asked Amanda, aghast.
Carter chuckled. “Because when my wife is happy, I’m happy.”
“It really works that way?” asked Amanda.
“Most definitely! You’ll learn that one day, if you ever take my advice and settle down.”
“Uh uh,” said Amanda, shaking her head. “No way.” She thought for a moment, then said, “What do you like doing with your wife? Do you guys, like, hang out without the kids, or isn’t that a thing married people do together?”
Carter cocked his head at her, wondering where her deep-seated naivety came from. If he could guess, her parents were either divorced or spent very little time interacting. But he was seeing a different side of Amanda. They’d shared a wall for months, and while he was open about his family and wife, she’d never asked anyth
ing more than basic, polite questions.
“My wife and I enjoy a lot of things together.” He paused, wondering if this would assuage Amanda’s curiosity or if she was genuinely interested in more. She was still looking at him, so he took that as a yes. “We love the theatre,” he said. “Plays, the opera, doesn’t really matter to us, it’s really just the experience. We have a no talking about the kids or work rule. It’s our time to reconnect as a couple.” He paused again but she was still listening. “We get really dressed up,” he tugged on his plain button-down, “none of this business, but fancy. And we treat ourselves to dinner, and sometimes we’ll even slip away early just to go make out in the car.” He chuckled when Amanda’s mouth opened in surprise. “We were lovers first, Amanda. Best friends before that. And to this day we still are. I make sure we still are.”
Amanda sat back in her seat. She could feel this heat behind her eyes, this happiness -mixed with sadness. As Carter turned to address the mail-person she looked at him, really looked at him. He didn’t seem to be the type of man whose desire was to please a woman. He was gregarious, yet he was plain, mostly non-descript except for his too big belly. Yet she knew his family was what he lived for. He talked about his children as if they were carved from gold and lived on a pedestal. She heard how he talked about his wife. And while the stories were mixed with the typical strain of a married couple, he basically worshipped her. Amanda couldn’t imagine someone speaking about her in that manner.
Carter turned back to her, smiling, but when he caught the look on her face, it faltered. “What’s wrong?” he asked, looking around to see if it had to do with someone she was speaking with.