Derrick knew how hard his parents worked and he knew that their combined salaries equaled about fifty thousand dollars. The first year he worked, he tripled that, and when his father found out, Derrick felt ashamed. He didn't want to embarrass his father, and he didn't want his father to think he thought he was better than his parents.
As he shared his story with Erica tears pricked her eyes. She grabbed a tissue blotted her eyes and with her other hand rubbed his back. "Derrick, making money is not a bad thing. It's when we allow money to change us then it's pure evil."
Derrick looked at Erica. "I told no one that story."
"No. Not even Jen." Erica shocked that he never shared such a valuable piece of information about himself to anyone.
"Nope, not even her."
Erica's hand rested on the counter. Derrick placed his hand on top of hers. They stayed like that for a moment each staring down at their hands. "The girls I've dated have all been superficial. Sometimes I question myself. Why am I attracted to girls like that? You're the first girl I've met that is different."
"Maybe, you need to hang out in more yoga studios."
"Is that what it is?" Derrick questioned.
"Derrick, your lawyer world attracts certain types of people, and they become your circle of friends, acquaintances, girlfriends."
Erica watched as Derrick let what she said to settle in. Erica lightened the mood. "Would you like me to read to you?"
Derrick lifted his eyebrows, "Read to me." He paused, "the last woman who read to me was my mother when I was five."
Derrick watched as Erica disappeared into her closet and came out with a Kindle. She proceeded towards her bed, and Derrick joined her. She straightened the covers, fluffed the pillows, and they both got comfortable in the center of the bed. Erica pressed the power button on the Kindle, leaned over, pulled out the drawer in her nightstand and donned a pair of tortoise shell eyeglasses that reminded Derrick of sex.
Derrick glimpsed at the title. "Middlemarch." He exclaimed. "We only have until Tuesday."
"Well, we better get busy."
Derrick snuggled in close and closed his eyes as Erica read. Two hours later, they were doing the same thing. Derrick had never felt so content. One consistent thought kept passing through his mind though he tried to push it aside… I want to be doing exactly this for the rest of my life.
Derrick knew the possibility existed that he and Erica might not have gotten along. Derrick didn't expect the reality would be so much better than the fantasy.
Three days ago, his world turned upside down when he ran into Erica. Now, he moved out of his hotel room and into her Zen haven and adapted to her yoga posing, aromatherapy-induced, naked most of the time, minimalist way of life.
Erica didn't own a television, which left plenty of time for everything else. They're routine comprised of sex as soon as they walked in the apartment. Next, talking after sex, sometimes followed by a shower and more sex, dinner, more talking, reading, more sex, sleep, middle of the night sex, more sleep, wake up, morning sex, meditation, yoga, breakfast with a glass of sludge, work, repeat.
Derrick never knew life could be simple and so enjoyable, but he also knew his real life would take over. Work Derrick felt stodgy compared to Erica’s Derrick. Erica’s Derrick smoked aromatherapy sticks, had sex on the brain, and wanted to walk around naked all the time. He did yoga poses in the nude and drank muddy looking green drinks.
Work Derrick stressed out about everything, shoulders tense, his clothes felt too tight, especially the collar around his neck tied tight with silk. The tie is bondage without the fun sex to go along with it.
Like Clark Kent and Superman, during the day he had to endure his scratchy suit, too tight collar, and inflexible leather shoes, and he remained miserable until six o'clock. At six o'clock, he became Erica's naked superman. Throwing her naked body around every which way, making her scream out for more while bringing her to pure orgasmic bliss.
Tonight was the eve of day three. Instead of eating in, they were dressing up to go out for dinner. Erica's friend opened a new restaurant, and tonight they'd attend the grand opening.
When they arrived at the restaurant, an attractive man in his late thirties walked towards them. With open arms, he scooped Erica up giving her a too long for Derrick's taste hug. He planted a kiss on her lips which made Derrick want to reach for the nearest napkin and wipe her lips.
"Derrick, I'd like you to meet my dear friend, Dillon." Erica reached back and gripped Derrick's hand bringing him closer to her.
"Dear friend, we were once more than that, or at least I thought we were." Dillon tried to play off his comment with sarcasm as he extended his hand to Derrick.
They shook hands with no words spoken. Derrick didn't like this guy. He hoped Dillon would play host then get lost.
After a few exchanged pleasantries, Dillon walked Derrick and Erica to their table. It was a dark butcher-block table, small enough that their knees almost touched, and a modern glass votive candle set in the middle. The restaurant had a modern rustic feel to it. Weathered wood tables, floors, and a bar were the focus of the restaurant with deep blue and gray colors on the walls and trim. The lighting dim and only enough to read the menu.
Erica looked beautiful. Her rosy lips and cheeks made deeper by the warm low light. The sheen in her eyes made her glow. She looked happy, genuinely happy. "Are you always like this?" Derrick asked as he reached for her hand.
"What do you mean? Like what?" She asked.
"Happy, glowing." He stroked her fingers.
"I have a lot to be happy about." Erica retracted her hand from Derrick's when Dillon approached the table carrying menus. Dillon handed them both a menu, made suggestions and gave them their privacy.
The waiter first brought out a bottle of red wine, compliments of Dillon. Derrick and Erica shared bone marrow with olive oil toasted banquettes. For the main course, they each chose a different pasta dish, which they shared with each other.
"Can I stop by your office tomorrow? I have free time in the afternoon." Derrick asked Erica as he forked into her pasta.
"Yes, but, I must warn you; you may not find it interesting."
"Why would you say that?" Derrick sat back in his chair surprised by Erica's downplay of what she did for a living.
"Because besides the store front which I love, my offices upstairs house rows of sewing tables, a lot of material, and yoga pants and designs everywhere. I have my office, and we handled online orders in a separate office next to mine."
"You started a business on your own, that makes it interesting and exciting. I can't wait to see it." Derrick lifted his wine glass to his mouth. "Your friend's restaurant is incredible."
"Amazing but I knew it would be. He cooked me the best meals." Erica wiped the corner of her mouth with her cloth napkin she lifted from her lap.
"After you had sex?" Derrick knew as the words left his lips he shouldn't have gone there. He prepared for the wicked backlash he expected from Erica.
"It was great because we worked up such an appetite." She continued to fork Casarecce pasta into her mouth.
Derrick felt the need to vomit. The thought of Erica with Dillon made him sick. She didn't even bother denying it. "Did you date?"
"Just friends. I had no interest in dating him." Erica collapsed back in her seat and dropped her napkin next to her plate. "I'm stuffed."
"So no dessert." Derrick forked the few pieces left of his pasta and finished it in one bite. It traveled down his throat like a tennis ball with nails because his brain stuck on the thought of Erica and Dillon.
"No, I'm not a dessert person. Sweets don't do it for me." Erica rested her hand on her stomach circling her full belly. They sat in silence waiting for the check. When it arrived, Derrick dropped his credit card in the center of the leather case and handed it back to the waiter.
Erica noticed Derrick became quiet. "Derrick, is everything okay?"
"No." His answer clipped.
"Would you consider elaborating?" She stayed too calm for Derrick's liking.
"I can't stomach the thought of you with Dillon."
A smile crossed her face as she tilted her head to one side. "Derrick, it was a few times years ago. He's just a friend, then and now." She leaned in and reached for his hand.
"And us?" Derrick couldn't believe what he asked, so he self-corrected. "I hope we'll always be friends even if we're with other people."
Erica didn't answer him right away, but her mouth dropped open. She stared down at their hands searching for the right thing to say. Why hadn’t he considered a relationship with her? "Yes, you're a friend. A friend who in four days is moving to London for a year and when you return, you'll still be a friend." Erica accepted the circumstance handed to her. She understood not to fight fate even though she felt sickened by Derrick's blatant insult. She couldn't imagine them remaining friends even if they were in other relationships but if that's what he wanted that's what she'd give him.
“I’m glad we’ll always be friends.” He said it but he wasn’t sure he meant it. He didn’t know what he felt. Not true. He knew he felt frustrated. Erica, the move to London, bad timing, and even, himself, aggravated Derrick. He should have called her a year ago. He would never have switched jobs and agreed to this move if he knew Erica would enter his life again.
Wait! What was he thinking?
Their relationship was just sex, and that's all it could be. Amazing sex, fantastic sex mind blowing sex but that's all it could, only that. Erica would never fit into his lifestyle. It would destroy her. He needed to reel in his thoughts. Derrick wanted to punch something. Where was Dillon?
Erica wanted to cry. She wanted to shake him and ask him how he could be so blind, but instead, she planted her feet on the wood floor beneath her and reminded herself how rooted she was. Derrick considered her a friend and nothing more.
"So when I move back to New York could we continue where we left off?" He asked. "That's if were not in serious relationships."
"Friends with benefits? Let's wait and see." Calmness saturated her voice, but she felt anything but calm. The words hurt and Derrick's total lack of decency for her needs hurt more. Did he lose his fucking mind?
Aggravated, Derrick threw his napkin down on the table like a referee calling foul.
The act itself stoked a fire in Erica's belly. "And anyway you're meeting up with your ex-girlfriend while you're there... who knows what will come of that." She stuck a poker into the burning embers.
"I have no interest in Julie." The thought angered him.
"Yes, but to be fair to myself, I can't create some false narrative while I'm here and you're in London. I don't want to spend the next year thinking you're coming back when it's possible you'll come back but maybe not to me." Anger burned deep in her gut. "And anyway, I may meet my future husband while you're in London."
That thought infuriated Derrick. He had no right pinning her down but considering another man pinning her down made him sick with jealousy. But he had no right to be angry. Sex was the only thing on the table. He wasn't asking her to marry him. He couldn't marry a girl like Erica. She'd never fit into his lifestyle. She'd be miserable. He continued telling himself.
Erica didn't want to fight with him. Their limited time should be spent loving each other, or at least one-sided love. "Derrick, can we go home, make love and finish out these few days in sexual bliss? I don't want to fight with you about something that isn't happening."
Derrick realized he would get no satisfaction from this conversation, so he changed course. He didn't want to end his time with her fighting about what if, either? He knew he had nothing to offer her but sex. Derrick felt as manipulative as Jen. He mislead Erica into thinking he'd come back to New York and look for her but he knew anything could happen in a year. Derrick hoped she'd pine for him, unable to even look at another, while he lived in London, in case he came back as a single man, she'd be waiting for him. Derrick had never been the jealous type with any of the girls he dated in his past, but something about the thought of Erica with any man other than himself made him sick and jealous.
The next afternoon, Derrick headed over to Erica's company. The excitement he felt seeing what she created and built by herself made him forget about his uneasiness the night before. When he arrived at the store, he stood outside staring at the sign above the doors. It read 'Bend It Yoga Apparel' in a shade of forest green. The name brought a smile to Derrick's face. Upon entering the store, the smell of aromatherapy enveloped him. The same scent Erica burned every morning when they did their meditation.
The store was a perfect representation of Erica. Rustic wooden tables and shelves housed dozens of styles and patterns of yoga apparel. Yoga accessories like mats, blocks, and straps propped up in baskets stood in the corner and a large pine table displayed meditation pillows.
Various hand painted pictures hung on the walls in thick black wooden frames. The artist used craft paper, a wide brush, and black paint. With long strokes, the artist painted abstract figures standing in yoga poses. Drawn to them, he wanted a closer look. Caught by surprise when he noticed the artist's initials in the lower right-hand corner, 'EG', he walked around to get a better look at each one.
"Do you like them?" Derrick turned to find Erica standing in the middle of the store.
"I do. You painted these pictures?"
"Yes, I got the idea from a local monastery. The monks wrap the packages in craft paper but before they do, they paint an abstract self-portrait on it." She walked over and stood next to him. "I frame all their self-portraits. Those pictures are hanging upstairs in the offices."
Derrick turned to look at Erica. He took in a deep breath. "I find everything about you interesting." He leaned in for a kiss.
They stood next to each other admiring the artwork. "I forgot to tell you, Sunday night I have a work engagement to attend."
"Nice, is it a dinner?"
"Yes, the partners are taking a few of us out before we leave. I've been to a few dinners like this. It's at a nice restaurant, and they bring their significant others, so it's more casual conversation rather than all work talk."
"How should I dress?" Erica asked.
"Oh, I planned on attending alone." Derrick didn't see that coming. He never thought Erica would assume he'd bring her.
Erica's chest constricted. She felt like a fool for assuming she'd be going with him. "I was kidding." She wanted to cry, "Excuse me I need to use the ladies room." Erica heard Derrick call out to her and without turning around, she put up her finger gesturing she'd be back in a minute.
The joy in Erica's face when she thought he'd invite her to the dinner broke his heart. He couldn't bring her. This job in this law firm was his ticket to the top, Derrick felt unprepared to explain his relationship with Erica, and his peers and the partners would not understand his choice of bringing a casual fling to such an important dinner. Plus, Erica wouldn't fit in with the partner's significant others. They're conservative and Erica, well, Erica is not.
Erica acted normal when she arrived back. Maybe, Derrick had it all wrong but she no longer seemed disappointed. "Let me show you upstairs."
The week continued how it started except for Monday night. Monday night, their last night together, took on a somber tone. They started the evening off with dinner at a quiet French restaurant a few blocks away from Erica's apartment.
They focused the conversation on Derrick's itinerary when he landed in London. He would be very busy settling himself in. His company set up space for him at a flat in the more expensive section of London. His firm had a small satellite office there to cater to their London clientele. That would be his home base, but he'd conduct most of his work through the client's offices.
After dinner, they walked back to Erica's apartment. Erica lit a few candles and turned off the lights. The warm glow enhanced their somber mood. Derrick came out of the bathroom and met Erica at the side of her bed. He took her face in his h
ands and leaned down to kiss her. His lips rested on Erica's as he spoke. "I'm going to miss you. I feel sick about it."
"Me too." She whispered.
"It's only one year, and you could visit." Derrick tried to stay optimistic.
"I know. We can FaceTime."
Derrick took Erica in his arms and held her. She stepped back and looked in his eyes. Erica, while keeping eye contact, reached for the hem of her dress. She slipped it over her head and stood in front of him naked.
A mischievous smile crept along Derrick's mouth. "You mean to tell me while I sat across from you at dinner you were completely naked under that dress."
Erica bit her bottom lip and nodded.
Derrick stripped down, and he and Erica stood together bodies touching, kissing each other's skin. All talking ceased for the rest of the night as they made love. There were no hard thrusts, no throwing each other around, no calling out the other's name, no calling out of God, no moans of deep satisfaction. It was Derrick and Erica making sweet, quiet love.
The next morning, Erica walked Derrick down to his waiting car service. Tears welled in her eyes as he kissed her goodbye. "I want you to come with me."
"That would make me a hooker."
Derrick's expression twisted. "What?"
"Well, you use me... I mean we use each other for sex so to go with you to London to be your sex toy would make me a... hooker or a mistress or as you called it - a distraction."
It felt like someone punched him in the gut. He thought what they had was just sex until he listened to Erica's harsh description of how he made her feel. He fucked this up, and he figured out seven days too late.
He hugged Erica tightly hoping to squeeze out the version of them he convinced her of, but he knew it would take a lot more than that. Derrick stepped into the back of the car, rolled down the window and waved as the car drove off down the street.
The In-Between Girl Page 8