She scrambled to catch it. "Hey, take it easy."
I threw up my arms in disgust and stomped into the house.
Zelda followed me inside like a scared puppy. "Come on, Scotti. It's not that bad."
I wheeled around. "Not that bad? Are you nuts? Ted has a business that caters to a lot of wealthy and stuffy people. What do you think they'll do when they see that online?"
Boomer ran under the sofa to hide — terrified of the screaming woman who used to be his sweet mommy.
Zelda shook her head but looked worried. "They won't see it online. Those people don't watch videos." She smirked, "They're too busy counting their money."
I shook my fists at her. "You think so, huh? Well, what about their secretaries and their assistants? Are they too busy counting their money too? Who do you think arranges limo service for them?"
Zelda paled and looked like she might puke. "Oh shit."
I wagged a finger at her. "I don't trust Steve to fix this. So you get on the phone, and you do whatever you have to, to get Eric to scrub that thing off the Internet."
Zelda pouted. "I don't want to talk to Eric."
I jabbed a finger at her. "Do I look like someone who gives a shit about what you want?" I glared at her so hard I probably singed her eyebrows. "Just do it."
Zelda held up her hands. "Okay, okay. I'll do it. But why am I catching all the shit for this? It wasn't my idea."
"You encouraged it. You egged them on. You wanted to see 'perfect Ted' get his balls busted."
Properly shamed, Zelda called Eric. I took the phone from her and begged him myself. Without hesitation, he promised he'd get right on it. He even offered to hack Steve to screw with him. "I could empty his phone and wipe out his restore. It'd take forever for him to get all his data back."
The offer was tempting, but Steve and Ted were partners, and I couldn’t risk their losing valuable business information. "Thanks for the offer. For now, I just want that video to disappear."
If there was one thing Eric liked, it was revenge. And to protect Ted, I had felt no guilty about using that quirk to my advantage.
As my final damage control measure, I made Zelda send me the video and erase it from her phone while I watched. "Jeez, don't you trust me?"
"I did. Now, not so much." I grabbed my keys and my bag. "Try to stay out of trouble until I get back."
"Where are you going?"
<<>>
As I expected, Steve's Road Ranger was in the driveway when I got to Ted’s house. And the sight of it ignited my fury again. I banged through the front door which scared the crap out of Steve and Ted, who slouched on the sofa..
Steve gulped and looked for support from Ted, who gave him an 'you're on your own' look and smiled. But Steve didn't seem surprised to see me either — Zelda had obviously warned him I was coming. "Okay Scotti, I know you’re steamed but…"
I ignored Steve and glared at Ted. "I can’t stand to even look at him. Make him leave!"
Hung over and in no condition to argue Ted said, "Go home Steve. We'll talk later."
Steve grumbled but got off the sofa. On his way out, he paused and looked at me, but I pointed to the door and said, "Just get out of my sight."
Steve slammed the door behind him. A few seconds later he gunned the engine to let me know he was pissed, but I didn’t care.
I stared at Ted — pale, unshaven and wearing ratty sweats. "You look like twelve days of bad weather."
Ted managed a weak smile and patted the place next to him on the sofa. "Come here."
I shook my head. "No."
He frowned. "No?"
I waved my arms at him. "How could you let them do that to you?"
He rubbed his forehead and chuckled half-heartedly. "I didn't exactly let them. I was hammered."
My head dropped to my chest. "You let them do that to you too." I frowned at him. "I don't get this. They're your family. Why do they love humiliating you?"
Ted's head lolled back against the sofa cushions. "It's what brothers do to each other." He ran his hand through his dirty hair then shrugged. "It’s just normal stuff."
I shook my fists in the air. "It’s normal for your family to screw you over for sport?
Aren’t they supposed to have your back? Be there when you fall? Prop you up? Support you?"
Ted opened his arms. "Let’s stop talking about my lame-ass brothers, and you come here to me."
Frowning, I sat next to him. He put his arms around me and squeezed. He whispered into my ear, "Relax, it wasn't that bad."
I pulled back. "Not that bad? I just spent the last two hours getting that thing scrubbed off the Internet. And what makes me crazy is that your lame-ass brothers have copies. And since they think it's so hilarious, Eric will probably be scrubbing it for the next month."
Ted smiled and pulled me closer. "Sorry babe, but my brothers will never live up to your girly version of family. It's not all rainbows and puppy dogs." He laughed. "More like hard-ons and belches." He tilted my head up to look at him. "I have five brothers; we've competed all our lives. Sometimes they’re assholes. Sometimes I’m an asshole. It's just the way it is."
I pouted. "I don't like it. I hate it."
He tousled my hair. "You'll get used to it."
I shook my head. "The hell I will."
Ted chuckled. "I will, however, give you high marks for scaring the shit out of Steve." His chuckle became a laugh. "He came over here to beg me not to kick him out of the business. Swore he'd never do it again." He tweaked my nose. "Thanks to you, it’ll be weeks before he finds his balls again."
I laughed. "Good. I hope he has to send out a search party for them." I lay my head on his shoulder. "Did you see it? The video?"
Ted sucked air through his teeth. "Oh yeah. Several times."
I raised my head and frowned at him. "Why, were you trying to re-live the experience?"
He winced. "Negative. I was trying to convince myself it wasn’t as bad as it was."
"No, it was much worse."
Ted pressed his lips to my forehead. "Thanks for getting Eric on it. If I'm lucky, none of my clients will ever see it. You really have my six, don't you recruit?"
I pursed my lips. "Roger that. But don’t be too impressed, I still have four more Jordans to terrify into submission and that doesn’t include you mother." Ted threw back his head and laughed. "What's so funny?
"You don't get it do you? Steve's the ringleader. If you cut off the head of the snake, the tail is useless." He pumped a fist in the air. "Mission accomplished. Take the victory lap, babe."
I smirked. "Hardly worthy of a victory lap but it’s good they know I'm not a push-over. I kissed his cheek. "How are you feeling? Still hammered?"
"A little." He rubbed his stomach. "Man was not meant to drink that much tequila. Ever."
I tugged on his arm. "You need a shower, because, honey you stink. I'll make dinner or get some takeout?"
Ted went pale at the suggestion of food. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my neck. "I think I'll just nibble on what I've got here."
I wriggled out of his arms and fanned my face. "Nice idea, but you really do stink."
He pulled out his tee shirt and sniffed. "You're right, I stink." He propped his big feet on the coffee table. "How was your day?"
I told him about the funeral service and the wake. He listened politely but his jaw clenched while his eyes glazed over. I should've dropped it right there, but I didn’t tell about my conversation with Donna, later he’d accuse me of keeping things from him. "Donna doesn't think it was an accident either."
Ted tensed and scowled at me. "No Scotti, you ain't going there."
I gave him the innocent eyes. "I'm not going anywhere. I’ll just have a chat with Daniels."
Ted creased his brow. "About what? Nothing's changed."
I reminded him about Beidemeyer and Marika and filled in a few other details.
Ted didn't see the military connection as relevant. "Mike and the o
ther guys have the same connection. You don’t think they force-fed Ron the pills. So why would this Beidemeyer do it? That's what you’re getting at, right? That Beidemeyer killed him?"
"Mike and the guys weren't sleeping with Ron's wife. In fact, I think Beidemeyer is the Jody that Mike was talking about that night in Sizzler. And what about the threat Marika made to Beidemeyer?" Ted's jaw tensed more. "You can’t think this is all just a coincidence."
Ted scratched the stubble on his cheek. "What’s Joe’s take?"
I slouched against the sofa and admired my new manicure. "I haven't run it by Joe yet, but he'll probably agree with me."
He pulled me into his lap. "Scotti Fitzgerald, what the hell am I going to do with you?" I pinched my nose and waved a hand. "I don't care if I stink, you're going to listen to me. You haven’t it run it by Joe because you know he won’t agree." I started protest but he pressed his finger against my lips. "Don’t bother trying to bullshit me either. You're only stalling so you can devise a way to trick him into agreeing with you."
I climbed out of his lap, moved to the end of the sofa and pouted.
Ted pulled my foot into his lap and massaged it. A little too hard. "You remember the last time you thought an accidental death was a murder?"
I pulled my foot away and tucked it under me. "Yes I remember. And I especially remember that I was right."
He implored me with his eyes. "And being right was worth risking your life?”
I scoffed. "It wasn’t that bad."
Ted threw up his arms. "Bad enough for you to be in the hospital for two weeks." He squinted at me. "You’ve got a hunch and I’m supposed to do what? Just let you go off and get yourself killed?"
I shook my fists in the air. "I'm just going to talk to Daniels for cripes sake. And the only risk to talking to him is over-eating." Ted cracked a smile, and I poked him with my foot. "Honey, I am who I am. You can't save me from myself."
Ted lost his smile and shook his head. "Quit accusing me of being your white knight. I'm not doing that."
"Sure you are." I nudged him with my foot again. "It's your thing. I love you for it. But you're overreacting."
He wagged his finger at me. "You just about took my brother's head off for making a drunk video of me, and I'm overreacting because I don't want you in the middle of this mess? It's unreasonable that I want you to be safe?"
I chuckled. "I've never been safe in my life. Why start now?"
Ted didn't laugh. "Because I want a future with you."
I slid next to him and stroked his arm. "I want a future with you too. But I also want to know the truth, don't you? Ron didn't deserve to die like that, did he?"
The smolder of bad memories darkened his gaze. "There are worse ways to die. Ways you can't imagine and don't want to know."
I studied him for a minute. "If you’re not my white knight, then I’m not your damsel in distress either."
He folded his arms over his chest but said nothing. I saw him drifting toward those unimaginable things — the evil that fed his nightmares.
I took his hand and squeezed. "Ted what happened to you? I know it was awful and you don't want to talk about it. But you have to tell me something." He tried to look away but I wouldn't let him. "You love to give me grief about how you worry about me. But I'm not supposed to worry about you? That's not fair, is it?" I couldn't help myself, I had to push it, I had to say what I thought even though it would probably explode in my face. "Look, I can see that Ron's death stirred up something for you." He looked at me sharply. "You make all the faces you want, but it's true. It's eating at you." My voice cracked. "Did you ever stop to think that maybe I worry about you ending up in a filthy rest room surrounded by empty pill bottles?"
He turned to me, trembling. "That's never going to happen."
I waved my arms at him. "Why? Because you say so?" I was so mad and scared that I trembled too. "I was here when you woke up screaming. I held you all night just to keep you calm. What happens when you just can't take it anymore?" I sighed and took his hand. "Steve's right. You think you have to be perfect. You think you need to be this perfect guy for me. But that's not what I want. I just want you, with all your warts and imperfections, whatever they are." He let go of my heart and I felt him drifting away from me. "I don't want to lose you either Ted. I love you. Why can’t you talk to me? Don't you trust me?"
His jaw was tight and his words clipped. "I handled all that a long time ago. I don't need to re-live it."
I threw up my hands in frustration. "Fine, don't tell me anything. Just keep it all in and never say a word. That'll work. We can just pretend nothing's there." I snarled at him. "But don't you accuse me of keeping secrets then."
Ted sneered at me. "So you want me to talk to you? Is that it, Scotti? What do you want to know? About the body parts that are left after your truck rolls over an IED? How sometimes the only thing left of one of your guys is an arm, or a leg or maybe just a finger? Or the scurvy creep you feel in your gut every time the call to prayer sounds, and you realize you ain't in fucking Kansas anymore?" He threw out his arms. "How fucking hot it is during the day and how fucking cold it is at night?" He lifted his shirt and exposed his angry red scar. "Or how it feels to be sliced while you're choking the life out of another human being trying to kill you up to his last breath?"
Speechless, I stared at him.
His voice cracked. "Or how it feels to send another kid home in a box to his pregnant wife and kids because you just couldn't get to him in time? Because you’re just not as fucking good as you think you are?"
Tears streamed down my face and I whispered, "I'm sorry." The pain in his eyes was like a fist in my gut. I reached for him. "Honey."
He turned away, fisting his hands. "No, I can't. I won't."
I put my hand on his shoulder. "Baby?"
He whimpered then fell into my arms. He whispered, "I lost them."
I combed my fingers through his hair. "I'm sorry."
He cried softly. "I couldn't save them. I could only pick up what was left of them." He shuddered. "There was so little left of them. So fucking little. I let them down."
I whispered. "No baby, you did everything you could. I know you did. You tried your best."
He groaned from a place deep inside. "Wasn't good enough. Wasn't good enough. I wasn't fucking good enough."
Chapter Twenty-Three
Looking over the reading glasses perched on the end of his nose, Joe asked, "What part of 'no,' don't you understand, missy?" He forbade me to tell the cops about Beidemeyer and Marika Jansen.
I leaned across the desk. "Just hear me out."
He shook his head wide and slow. "Ain't gonna happen." He squinted over at Zelda. "And don't you start neither."
Zelda threw up her arms. "I didn't say anything."
Defeated, I slumped into the chair next to Zelda. It was a little past five and we languished in the air conditioning after a triple digit day in the truck. I hadn't eaten anything but ice cream and frozen fruit bars and my stomach gurgled. I squinted at Joe who refused to remain in focus.
He scowled at me. "What's the matter with you?"
I angled my head because looking straight made me dizzy. "Nothing. What's the matter with you?"
Joe stared at me. "You look as wrong as white-walls on a tractor. Y’all gallivanting all over town in that dang truck without air conditioning is giving you heat stroke." I made a face at him. He frowned and stacked papers on his desk. "As to Mr. Beidemeyer, we're wrapping it up anyways."
I straightened in my chair. "Why what happened? And if we’re done why can’t I tell the cops about him and Marika anyway? What difference does it make? They really should know about that. Right?"
He sighed loudly. "What are you a human machine gun? Quit interrupting me, and I'll tell you."
I held up my hands and zipped my lips.
"All righty, then. The missus is pulling the plug. She wants a report and then we're done." We nodded and remained in our seats. H
e flapped a hand at us. "Well, what are you waiting for? Write the dang report."
A little woozy, I leaned forward. "We did write the report. Last week, with the pictures and everything we had. You've been watching him the last few days, so if there's something to add…"
Joe's face twisted in confusion while his brain caught up with things. "Right you are, Miss Scotti." He stared at his computer like it was a buck-toothed blind date.
I dragged myself out of the chair. "How about I take dictation?"
Joe smiled and twinkled his eyes at me. "That'd be mighty kind of you." He offered me his seat and paced while he dictated. The next two hours he changed his mind, repeated himself, went off on tirades then returned to the topic, confusing himself more than anyone. But finally we completed the one-page addendum and the report was finished. I made backup computer copies then printed two hard copies — one for Joe’s files and one for Mrs. Beidemeyer.
M.urder R.eady to E.at (A Scotti Fitzgerald Murder Mystery Book 2) Page 14