Fabio's Remorse (Hell Raiders MC Book 5)

by Aden Lowe

  Trip stuck his head in the door of the little office where Badger and I kept track of the club's defensive, and offensive, resources. "Yo, Fabio, need to get with you on details for the run tomorrow."

  "I got time now, if you do. Just finished up."

  He came in and dropped into the extra chair. "We'll be meeting up with some of the Tennessee boys, and continuing on down through Georgia and into Florida."

  Normally, I would accompany them on such a run, but Kellen and I were catching up with a gun deal. "Going through the Saxons territory."

  Trip grinned. "Yeah. Our intel is that they've fragmented, no one trying to hold onto their old ground. And I'll be damned if I go the long way around just to avoid them."

  We spent the next ten minutes discussing the possibility of trouble, but my phone rang, interrupting. Unknown number. I let it go to voicemail while Trip and I finished up. It rang again as he left.

  "Yeah."

  "Is this Caleb Reach?" The male voice on the other end had an official ring to it.

  "Who's asking?" Official and me didn't mix all that well these days.

  "Mr. Reach, this is Trooper Michael Addison with the Oklahoma State Police. Will you confirm that you are Caleb Reach?"

  My gut flipped over. "Yeah, I am. What's up?" Instinctively, I knew I didn't want to hear what Trooper Addison had to say.

  "Alexis Reach Blair is your sister?"

  "She is. Is something wrong with Alexis or the kids?" Of course there wasn't. My heart still sat like a fucking stone in my chest, though.

  "Sir, I regret to inform you, your sister and her husband were killed in a traffic accident."

  All the air left my lungs. Not Alexis, too.

  "Sir, are you still there?"

  "Uh, yeah. Sorry." Fuck.

  "Sir, there's more. Your niece and nephew are with a family friend now, but it appears you are their only surviving relative. You'll need to make arrangements of some sort for them, or they will become wards of the state."

  Wards of the state. Fuck no. "Uh, yeah, okay. I'll be there as soon as possible."

  The Trooper gave me contact info and said call him when I reached Duncan, and that the Stephens County Sheriff's Office would be in touch as well, then hung up.

  I sat there, letting it sink in. Alexis. Gone. I hadn't known her husband well, so I didn't really feel his loss. Fuck, I should have manned up and gone home to visit when she asked. Guilt slammed into me. I gave up on my own sister, just because some bitch did me wrong. How fucking pathetic was that?

  My fist went through the wall, and I ignored the ache of bruised knuckles. It did nothing for the empty hole sitting in my chest. I locked up and headed out to the bar. Beer first, then find Kellen.

  "Hey, Fabio, 'sup? You look like somebody done pissed in your Cheerios." Cherry stood behind the bar with the new Prospect, no doubt showing him where to find everything. Without her, the Hell Raiders would be screwed. She kept us all in line.

  "Yeah, kinda feel that way, Cherry. Can I get a beer?"

  "Sure, honey. What's going on?" She handed me an icy cold bottle.

  I downed half of it before I replied. "Just got a call from back home. My sister and her husband got killed in a car accident."

  She came out from behind the bar in a hurry and enveloped me in her trademark hug. "Honey, I'm so sorry. Tell me what you need. Are you going back?"

  I leaned into that hug and let her comfort me, just like all my Brothers did when something knocked us for a loop. "Yeah, I have to. We didn't have any other family. And I have to see about her kids."

  Cherry patted my cheek. "Honey, you just let me know what I can do. And you take care of them babies."

  That hug did something to me. A sob choked me. "I didn't go back to visit when she asked."

  "Oh, honey." She pulled me in closer. "She loved you, so she understood. You can't change that now, but you can be there for her kids. So that's what you do."

  I sat there and cried, and let her hold me for a long time. Vaguely, I realized most of the rest of the club had gathered in silence, just showing support. Eventually, I calmed down enough to talk.

  "Uh, I just got word my sister was killed. I have to take a trip. Not sure how long I'll be gone."

  Several Raiders nodded, gave their condolences, and went back to whatever they'd been doing. We were tight and supportive of one another, but business had to go on.

  Kellen stopped and pulled me into a rough embrace. "You take all the time you need, man. And you let us know if there's anything you need. We got your back."

  "Thanks, Prez."

  "When do we leave?" Crank leaned against the bar behind Cherry.

  "I'm leaving in a couple hours. Cherry, you'll look out for Samurai?"

  "Of course, honey, you don't even have to ask that."

  "I'm going with you. You need a Brother at your side to face this shit." Crank's tone clearly said he'd made up his mind, and it wasn't up for discussion.

  All I could do was nod. "Thanks, man. I appreciate it. Not looking forward to this."

  "I'll get my shit together, and we'll roll." He squeezed my shoulder and headed for his room.

  I returned Cherry's hug once more. "Thank you."

  She smiled and patted my cheek once more. "Honey, you know I’m here."

  I nodded and said my farewells to the woman who had become like a mother to me. It only took a few minutes to get my shit together for the trip. I tended to travel light, and usually kept a bag ready to grab. One last minute check-in with Kellen, Trip, and Badger to make sure everything was squared away, and I was ready.

  Crank and I rolled out just after noon, ready to lay down some miles. Barring any trouble, we should make it to Duncan early in the morning, if we rode straight through. I had no intentions of stopping, knowing Alexis' kids were at risk of being turned over to the state. I knew very well what that shit did to a kid, and they were not going to see it.

  The solitude of the ride yawned before me like a chasm waiting to swallow me. Normally, I enjoyed it. This time, I figured I could do without the time to think. Too damn much misery waiting for me. The demons had to be confronted, though. I'd mostly avoided it for far too long.

  So I rode. And I thought.

  How would I feel about being home again? In the town where I grew up, around the people I knew back then? Part of me looked forward to it. I wondered if Mrs. Calhoun still lived down the street from my old house. My ninth grade Algebra teacher forced me to work my ass off in her class, and won my respect along the way.

  The funeral. Most likely, nothing was arranged yet. I would have to handle it all. Just getting through that shit would kill me. No man should have to make funeral arrangements for his sister.

  We stopped for a few minutes in southern Indiana to stretch and get a drink. I'd been opposed to any stops at first, but Crank made a good point. No matter how hard we rode, we couldn't get there before morning, and we couldn't do anything in the middle of the night except sit and twiddle our thumbs. So we took it a little easier.

  Crank took one look at my face when we pulled into that rest stop, and knew I'd been putting myself through hell. "Stop it, Fabio. You can't do anything about the past."

  "Yeah, man, I know. Still, I shouldn't have let one messed up bitch ruin shit for me with my family." The damn lukewarm water from the vending machine threatened to come back up. "When I think about all I let her take from me, and from my sister, I can't help getting pissed even more."

  "I get that, man. But blaming yourself now ain't going to help your sister, or those kids. The important thing is, you're taking care of business there now."

  He was right, of course, as usual. By the time we got back on the road, the guilt eased up a little. Just enough for me to think about Justine.

  Was she still in Duncan, with some other man? What would I do if I ran into her? The though fucking tormented me. Somewhere in Illinois, self-pity got the better of me, and tears ran down my cheeks, only to be immediately dr
ied by the wind.

  Why me? What the hell had I done to deserve that? Absolutely nothing. She utterly crushed me with that one little letter, and as I rode back toward her, I felt every bit of it all over again. All that heartbreak, grief, and misery poured through me in a tidal wave that threatened to pull my bike into a header with the next oncoming semi.

  I went back through all my memories, searching for some indication, some hint, of the betrayal to come. Like always, I found absolutely nothing. One minute, we were fine, the next, she dumped me. I had to be the biggest fucking fool in history to have fallen for her lies so long. The power I had given her over me for such a long time made me feel like even more of an idiot.

  The familiar rage returned to color the misery. By the next stop, somewhere in Missouri, I had a plan.

  "You doing okay?" Crank's words threatened to break through my resolve.

  Fuck no, I wasn't okay. But I would be. "Yeah, man, I'm good."

  We rolled into Duncan around four a.m., absolutely exhausted. The little motel by the highway seemed like as good a place as any to catch a couple hours' sleep before I had to dive into the hell waiting for me.

  The night clerk, who looked all of fifteen, eyed us warily as I filled out the registration and paid for three nights. "You won't cause any trouble, will you?" Her hands shook as she took the cash.

  I shook my head. "No, sugar. We just want to rest a few hours." Killed me, everywhere we went, people assumed the bike, cut, and ink meant we wanted to shoot up the town and rape their daughters.

  "Okay. I just have to make sure. My dad would kill me if I checked in anyone that tore up the room, or anything like that." She looked around nervously, avoiding my eyes.

  "Well, I can promise, we won't do anything but sleep and get a shower. Ain't got time for raising hell." Crank leaned against the counter, ready to turn on the charm. "Where's the best place around here to eat breakfast?"

  Not for the first time, I was glad for his company. The bastard could make just about any situation a little easier to bear. People liked him, despite the cut, bike, and ink. His laid back manner put them at ease.

  He chatted with the girl a few more minutes before we headed out to find our room. I didn't bother to take off more than my boots before I fell into the bed exhausted.

  14

  Fabio

  The meeting with Trooper Addison and a Deputy Sheriff took place at the Sheriff's Office. Crank came with me, reluctantly. Neither of us was too wild about willingly walking into a cop shop. A clerk showed us to an interview room and left us to cool our heels until Addison and the Deputy decided to show up.

  The pair came in and sat across from Crank and me, adjusting their papers around. It felt an awful lot like an interrogation. Finally, they were ready to get down to business.

  "Mr. Reach, my sincere condolences for your loss." Addison stared at me like he expected me to draw down and start shooting any minute.

  "What happened, anyway?" I didn't really want to know too much, but I had to know what happened.

  The Deputy cleared his throat. "Dispatch received the call, and first responders arrived on the scene in about two minutes. They found a two-vehicle accident. The vehicle we later learned belonged to your sister and her husband was hit in the passenger side by the other car. The medical examiner said Mrs. Blair died on impact. Mr. Blair was DOA."

  I felt like Ryker just landed his knee in my gut. All the air went out of my lungs, and chest constricted until my heart felt like it would stop. "What about the other vehicle?" I probably shouldn't ask, but it seemed important.

  Trooper Addison's turn to clear his throat. "The, uh, driver walked away from it."

  My face must have gone every shade of red, judging by the amount of heat. "What do you mean, walked away? How is that possible?"

  "I can't give details, because the driver was a minor."

  I knew freak accidents happened all the time, and people managed to walk away, by some miracle. But all too often, the ones who made it out were either drunk, or fucked up on something. That's how Hack survived wrapping his bike around a tree. If he hadn't been practically a rag doll, it would have killed him. I couldn't even voice my thoughts for the anger choking me.

  "This happened when, yesterday?" It's a good thing Crank came along. He remembered shit I was totally blanking on.

  "Actually, it happened Monday. It took us some time to figure out next of kin, and find Mr. Reach."

  Fuck. Two fucking days. My sister was two fucking days dead before I found out. How had I not felt it? Surely I should have known my own flesh and blood no longer lived? I mean, if I really loved my sister, how could I not know?

  And the kids. Fuck. "Where are my niece and nephew?" My voice sounded raw and ready to break.

  "They've been staying with Adam and Denise Thomas, who were close friends with Mr. and Mrs. Blair. CPS suggested, in the interest of not upsetting the children further." From the way Trooper Addison scowled, I figured he probably wasn't all that happy about it, but didn't know what else to do.

  "Thanks. I owe you one."

  He just nodded. "While we were trying to find and contact you, we found your sister's will, Mr. Reach. It will have to go through probate and be made final, of course, but she specified both of the children would be placed under your guardianship."

  Crank's expression mirrored the panic I felt. Kids? What the hell was I supposed to do with them? And why didn't Alexis tell me something this important? "Um, what exactly does that mean?"

  The Deputy cleared his throat and gave Trooper Addison a quelling look, but Addison just shook his head and went on. "Look, I'm completely off the record here, understood? CPS will explain everything completely. But it means you're responsible for those kids now. If you can't be, for whatever reason, the court will place them, hopefully with some extended family we haven't found yet, or at least with family friends. But the truth is, without you, they're liable to end up in the system."

  Another knee from Ryker landed in my gut, along with a kick to the jaw. Not literally, of course, but that's how it felt. "So, let me make sure I have it right. Unless I take care of them, they go to foster care?"

  Addison nodded. "That's about the size of it. It's more complicated, of course."

  "Thanks for telling me straight." I tried to breathe, without much success. "Okay, what's the next step here?"

  The Deputy jumped in. "The bodies are currently at the morgue. You'll have to make arrangements with a mortuary. We'll release the decedents' personal effects, the items found with them, to you in a few moments."

  "And the kids?"

  This time when the Deputy started to talk, Addison elbowed him, not too gently, and took over. "I've already called a friend over at CPS. She'll be here in about an hour to take you to them. She'll have whatever paperwork you need, too."

  Crank leaned back in his chair a little. "Okay, I guess I'll get on finding a funeral parlor then?"

  "Deputy, I'm sure you could help with that?" Addison all but glared until the Deputy nodded.

  "I can. Right this way, sir." The man's distaste in having to deal with us further showed in every movement as he stood and headed for the door.

  Crank slapped my shoulder as he stood and followed.

  "I have some paperwork for you sign, Mr. Reach, while your friend tracks down funeral parlors." Addison opened the folder in front of him and started passing forms over.

  I didn't pay a whole lot of attention, just signed and moved to the next one. My brain and emotions had gone numb, leaving me on autopilot. Shit, I had to get it together. Little Nicole and Tyler deserved better. By the time I got to them, I had to be squared away and ready to deal with whatever they came at me with. Finally, I signed the last form, and Addison escorted me out to where Crank sat, talking to someone on the phone.

  He finished the call and stood. "That was Kellen. Just filled him in. Funeral home is already on the way, and they said you could come in this afternoon or in the morning to m
ake the arrangements."

  What the hell was I supposed to say to that? "Thanks, man."

  "Mr. Reach?" A tall blonde approached from the outer part of the office. "I'm Sarah Channing, from Child Protective Services." She extended a hand, clearly expecting me to shake it.

  "Uh, yeah. Caleb Reach." My real name sounded utterly foreign to me. For so long, I'd been just Fabio in every way that counted. It would take some getting used to. I shook her hand. "Where are my niece and nephew?"

  "They're safe, Mr. Reach. We have to go over some paperwork, then I can take you to them."

  More fucking paperwork. From the skeptical looks Ms. Channing gave Crank and me, I was pretty sure there would be a criminal background check mixed in with that paperwork. "Fine."

  She led the way to a different interview room, and only reluctantly allowed Crank to sit in. Trooper Addison assured her it was okay, or she probably wouldn't have. She went over a ton of details that sounded more like threats.

  It didn't take long for me to get antsy, and I could tell Crank had a few things to say. "Let me get this straight, Ms. Channing. My sister specified in her will that I have guardianship of her children?"

  "Yes, but the will has yet to be probated. We also have no idea whether it's even legal."

  "Assuming the will is legal, why the delay?" Crank scowled across the table at her.

  "We have to be sure the children are placed—"

  "With their family. Correct?"

  She nodded, and not very happily. "Yes. However, it would seem Mr. Reach was estranged from his sister and her family. We have to ensure he really is the best person to care for them."

  "Estranged?"

  "Yes, it means—"

  "I know very fucking well what the word means, Ms. Channing. Why would you think I was estranged from them?" This is all coming way too fast. I might be able to cope with Alexis' death, and even with taking the kids. But this assumption they seemed to have made that I didn't care for Nicole and Tyler floored me. "I haven't been home for a long time, granted, but that had nothing to do with Alexis."