by T. J. Kline
The dog’s actions had left him with a cut on his head and a woman hiding scared in her office, but it could have been far worse. He didn’t blame Julia for hiding, for being afraid of him. Especially after what she’d already gone through with Evan. She deserved far better than what he could offer. He’d known it all along. This was just the proof he’d wanted to avoid facing the truth.
“What are you doing?” Julia’s voice was soft but hesitant from the doorway. He could hear the unease in the slight tremor, and when he turned to look at her, he could see the doubt in her eyes.
In one night, he’d gone from being her hero, a man she looked at with love and adoration, to seeing him with apprehension and fear. He’d done the one thing he promised not to do—hurt her—and in more ways than he wanted to count. He turned his back to her, unable to bear the agony her hesitation was causing within him.
“Packing. Gage and I are going to stay in town. I can come back every day to finish working with Roscoe until you think I’m ready for him to come with me.”
“You’re leaving?”
“I think it’s for the best.” He felt the lump in his throat choke him on the half-truth. Only a part of him believed it. Dylan wanted her to disagree, to argue, to reach out and give him hope again.
“I think you should take Roscoe with you now.”
He looked at her over his shoulder, surprised that she would agree to his leaving so readily, but trying not to show that it felt as if she’d just ripped him open with a dull knife. “Are you sure?”
His voice was raspy, raw from the pain, and he cleared his throat, wanting nothing more than to walk across the room and pull her into his arms. To tip her face up to his and take her mouth in a kiss, to hear her sigh of surrender and to make love to her, to show her how he wanted to worship her. His eyes fell to the bruise he could barely make out along the collar of her T-shirt.
Dylan crossed the room, without thinking, and moved her shirt down so he could fully see what he’d done. She gasped in surprise, or fear, but continued to look up at him with her beautiful innocent eyes. An ugly purple bruise was just beginning to mar her skin. It would turn purple and black later but, for now, the mark taunted him, reminding him of how he’d hurt her, of how much worse it would have been if not for Roscoe knocking him from the bed. He couldn’t even keep her safe from himself, let alone someone else. He had no idea how dangerous he was, what sort of monster lurked within him, that he could hurt her this way.
He moved his hand away from the material as if it burned. Julia’s chest heaved, as if she’d just finished running. She shuddered and Dylan fell to his knees in front of her, his hands holding her hips, and pressed his face to her stomach.
“I’m so sorry, Julia. I never meant to—”
“Shh,” she whispered, her hands moving to hold his face. Dylan refused to look up at her, until he felt her tears hit the top of his head. “I know.”
He’d failed again, but this time, the agony, the guilt, was far worse. Julia had trusted him, had placed her heart in his hands, and he’d betrayed that trust. As surely as if he’d pulled the trigger, he’d killed her love for him. He had to leave her, for her own safety. He was no better than Evan, even if it had been an accident.
“Dylan?”
She looked down at him, and in the depths of her eyes he saw that she wanted him to tell her it would be okay, that it had been a misunderstanding, or a nightmare. She needed to hear him tell her how much he loved her, that he wouldn’t ever let it happen again. He’d already broken so many promises to her, to himself; he couldn’t make one he knew he could never keep. Breaking her heart once was bad enough, doing it twice would be unforgivable.
He rose, his hands finding the curve of her jaw, and he buried his fingers into her long hair. He gave himself permission, just this last time, to kiss her. He had to feel her lips against his one final time, to inhale the sweet scent of her shampoo and the coconut lotion she put on her hands each night. He had to taste her, to have a glimpse of heaven one more time before he raised the wall between them, separating himself from her. His lips plucked at hers, at the corners of her mouth, his tongue finding hers to dance.
Julia clung to his arms, trembling against his chest. He wanted to wrap his arms around her and carry her to the bed, to bury himself within her and lose himself to the passion that ran between them like a river—strong and sure, enough to drown them both. He fought for control, not allowing his hands to move from her face. He felt his own hot tears scalding his cheeks, mingling with hers, at the sacrifice he knew he had to make.
“Julia, I can’t do this to you. I won’t condemn you to living a life like this. I love you too much for that.” He took a step back and grabbed his duffel from the bed. Brushing past her, he hurried for the front door with Roscoe on his heels. He had to get away before he began to second-guess his decision.
“Dylan.” He heard her footsteps behind him.
He knew he couldn’t turn around. The minute he did, he would return and hurt her again. Until he could erect a solid wall around his heart again, to force himself to ignore the pull between them and shut out his feelings, he couldn’t look back. Tomorrow. Tomorrow he would come back and get the rest of his things. Tomorrow he could return and train Roscoe with her as if there had never been an explosive connection between them. Tomorrow, he could go back to the cold, unfeeling shell of a man he’d been when he first arrived. That man could protect Julia without hurting her.
JULIA RUBBED THE dark circles under her eyes and prayed it was just a trick of the light. Nope, and no amount of makeup would cover them, even if she knew what she was doing, which she didn’t. She dragged her fingers through her hair and pulled it back into a messy ponytail. What did it matter? There was no one she was trying to impress. The one person she wanted to look pretty for had up and walked away last night without even talking to her. She pulled a clean T-shirt from her drawer and pulled it over her head and slid on a worn pair of jeans before slipping on her sneakers.
She found Chase with his chin in his hand and his head dipping toward the cold mug of coffee on the table. “Morning,” she muttered, reaching for her own cup.
“You look like crap.”
She turned and cast him a baleful glare. “You don’t look much better, I assure you.”
Chase scrubbed at his face, his day-old stubble rasping against his hands. “Yeah, well, I was up all night. What’s your excuse?”
“Same.”
Her frank answer was enough to make him take pause. “Julia, I’m really sorry about what happened yesterday. I never meant to cause any trouble.”
She shook her head and poured the coffee. “You didn’t. It was a storm already on the horizon.”
“You’re going to call him today, right?”
She picked up the mug and blew on the coffee, giving herself time to think of how best to answer his question. She’d been asking herself the same thing all night and had yet to come up with a concrete solution. “We need to continue training Roscoe for a little longer.”
Chase gave her his most parentally disapproving frown. “I have never, in my life, seen two people more head over heels. It was almost disgusting. You can’t just throw it away.”
“I’m not throwing anything away.”
His brow furrowed. “It was an accident, right?”
“What was an accident?” Justin came strolling into the kitchen as if he owned the place. Technically, he was a partial owner in the training facility, but it irritated her when he acted as though he was entitled to her home as well.
“Nothing.” She sipped the coffee and prayed Chase would follow her lead. The last thing she needed was for Justin to get all protective over an accident.
Justin looked around, bending to pet Tango and Gracie before grabbing his own mug. “Where are Gage and Dylan?”
“They’re staying in town.”
He spun slowly on his heel, as if unsure whether he heard her correctly. “Why? What happened
?”
She shrugged. “He thought it was a better idea.”
“Does that mean no more Dyl-ia?” She caught Chase’s glare as he shook his head at Justin. “That’s what we’ve been calling you guys.” He chuckled at his own joke.
“No.”
Justin paused at her clipped tone and walked over to her. “What’s goin’ on, sis? The truth.”
“I told you, nothing.” She sipped her coffee. Julia knew the instant he saw the bruise at her collarbone, because his eyes grew huge and blind rage set in.
“What the hell is that?”
She forced herself not to react. Justin was like a toddler at times, and she just needed to remain calm and he would match her mood. “That was an accident.”
“An accident?” He looked to Chase for confirmation, his voice now booming in the kitchen. “An accident? How the hell did this happen? Who did this? Evan?”
“Relax, Justin.”
“My sister is sporting a bruise that looks like one of Jessie’s horses kicked her square in the chest, and you don’t want to tell me what happened. Somebody better be under arrest, and one of you better start talking.” Justin began pacing the kitchen.
“Justin, sit down,” Julia begged, rubbing her temples. “You’re giving me a headache.”
“Julia,” he warned.
“Oh, for crying out loud, Dylan had a flashback and Julia tried to bring him out of it. She got too close, and that’s what happened.”
“Chase!” she warned, trying to stop the drama her brother was sure to start.
“I’m going to kill him. Is that why he left?” He moved toward her, trying to grab the edge of her collar and look at the bruise.
Julia slapped at his hands. “Get away. Yes, Justin, the special ops soldier was so afraid of what you’re capable of, he ran away to hide.”
Justin grasped the edge of the table, his knuckles turning white from the strain of trying to control his temper. “The sarcasm is a beautiful change of pace, Julia, very mature.” He spoke through gritted teeth.
She wasn’t in a frame of mind to have this discussion with him, not now and not later.
She stood up and dumped her coffee in the sink. “Since Chase is so talkative and knows all the details, he can fill you in on this one. I’m too tired and, honestly, I just don’t want to think about it anymore. I have dogs to feed and take care of. Chase, you and Gracie can join me out there in about an hour and we can get started.”
She snatched her cell phone and slipped it into her back pocket. “Tango, come.” Her voice was sharper than usual, and the dog jumped up to do her bidding. But he didn’t give her his usual tail thump, and she felt guilty for yelling at him. Between Justin, Chase, and Dylan, Tango was the only man in her life she wanted to spend any time with right now.
She’d no more walked into the kennel amid the din of barks and wild yips from the dogs when the phone rang. Julia looked down at the screen to see Gage’s number. She hated herself for wishing it was Dylan as she answered the call and shut the door. “Hey, Gage.” Julia ran her fingers over her forehead, brushing her bangs back as she shifted the phone to her shoulder and plugged her ear to hear him better. “What’s up?”
“Hi, Julia.” Her heart came to a complete stop in her throat as soon as she heard Dylan’s voice. “Sorry, I think I left my phone at your place. Would you be willing to come into town to work Roscoe today?”
“I suppose.” He sounded tired and there was a cold edge to his voice. Nothing seemed warm or familiar, or apologetic. This wasn’t a friendly call. He was all business. She took a deep breath, steeling her will to remain professional, to hide the pain she felt at his abandonment. “Is everything . . . okay?”
“Yeah, I’m just tired. It was a long night,” he confessed, and she could imagine that he would be rubbing his hand over his head, the way he always did when he was frustrated. She didn’t want to acknowledge the flip her heart did against her ribs while wondering if he’d spent his night missing her as much as she had him.
“What did you have in mind?” Just the thought of seeing him later warmed her, and she had difficulty catching her breath. He’d been gone only twelve hours, and yet it felt like days. “Did you want to do the park again? I could bring Chase and Gracie.”
“Okay.” The icy tone had returned, and she wondered what she’d said to cause the change.
“Dylan, I miss you.” She heard his breath catch in the phone before he sighed into the receiver.
“I’ll see you at the park at one.” He disconnected the call before she could say anything else. A painful lump lodged in her throat, and her eyes blurred with tears. She leaned back against the kennel door and slid down the wood, burying her face in her hands. She’d used what little strength she had this morning to deal with Justin, and Dylan’s phone call had sapped whatever was left.
Her phone rang in her hand again. She sniffed and looked at it dumbly. Her heart skipped, nearly skidding to a stop in her throat as she saw Dylan’s number on the screen. She cleared her throat, not wanting him to know she’d been crying.
“Dylan, you found it?”
“Guess again, sweetheart.”
The hair rose on Tango’s neck, and he let out a low growl, his lips curling back over his teeth.
Chapter Twenty
EVAN’S VOICE ECHOED in the receiver. Her mind raced, trying to figure out how he got his hands on Dylan’s phone and why the connection sounded so clear. She heard the click of footfalls and looked up in time to see Evan walk out of her office into the hall of the kennel.
“On guard!” Tango jumped up at her command, staring at Evan.
She knew it was a bluff command she’d taught him. She’d never trained Tango to attack, but she’d never trained Misty to attack either, and her protective instinct had gotten her killed. She wouldn’t let that happen to another one of her dogs, ever.
“You don’t want to do that,” he warned, disconnecting the call. “Remember the last dog you put between us?”
Julia worked her way up the wall, watching him, still at the other end of the aisle, looking like a snake ready to strike. It was shocking to see how much he’d aged over the past four years. She hadn’t noticed the sallow, wrinkled tone of his skin in the store. She’d been too afraid. But he looked sick, and she wondered if his illness had gained the upper hand on him. If so, she might be able to use the knowledge to her benefit.
“What are you doing here, Evan? How did you get Dylan’s phone?”
“You know, it’s a funny thing. You and lover boy started having trouble in paradise right when I was making my way through the backyard again, so I hopped into his room and grabbed it. Deputy Dawg had no idea I was even there.” He smiled, pleased with himself. “And I got to hear the entire conversation.” He stuck out his lower lip, mocking her. “It was so sweet.”
She reached down and grasped Tango’s collar. She wasn’t about to take a chance that he might lunge forward. Every movement that came from Evan sent him into a new frenzy of snarls and deep barks of warning.
Evan suddenly raised his hands to his head and cringed. “Can’t you shut these animals up?” He eyed the dogs in their runs.
“They want breakfast. You remember how that works.” She could practically see the wheels turning in his head. “If I feed them, they’ll quiet down.”
He glared at her. “We aren’t going to be here long enough to worry about it. Come on.”
“I’m not going with you.” If she left this ranch with Evan, no one would ever find her.
He pulled a gun from the back of his waistband. “You are or I will put a bullet into that dog right now. I have a clip of twenty here. There are plenty to go around.” The cruel smile that spread over his face was evil. She could only imagine the horrors he would have waiting for her if she didn’t comply. “Oh, look,” he offered, reaching into his pocket. “Another clip. Enough for every dog here and your brother and the cop in the kitchen.”
She bit her lip, and E
van shook his head at her. “Did you really think I didn’t know who was here and where they are? We’re going to take a little ride, and you’re going to leave that dog here.” He waved the gun at Tango.
She couldn’t put Tango in danger. “Where are you taking me?”
The gleeful grin that split his face scared her more than anything else he’d done. He gave her a maniacal laugh she’d heard only from villains in movies. Who acted this way?
“You’ll see. And it’s going to be fun.” He waved the gun in the air. He took a step toward her again, and Tango’s lip curled back once more, baring his long teeth. “You’d better calm him down, or I’ll shoot him right now.”
“Tango, down, stay,” she commanded. He lay down at the door, but he remained alert, watching her walk toward Evan. She never would have imagined in a million years she would willingly walk away from her ranch with this madman, but she couldn’t risk what Evan might do to someone else. She would figure out a way to get away from him, somehow, and complying with him would buy her some time.
Evan reached his hand out when she was within arm’s distance and grasped her by the hair, tugging hard enough to bring tears to her eyes. She blinked them away. She knew he liked her pain. It gave him the power he wanted to feel, and she refused to surrender to him.
He bent his face close to hers and arched a brow. “Oh, sweetheart, you can pretend you’re not enjoying this, but I know better. The longer you pretend, the more I’ll have to do to get you to crack.”
His breath was hot, reeking of stale coffee and hatred. She could almost feel the sting of the blows he’d delivered four years ago and knew she probably wouldn’t be so lucky this time. Evan shoved her out the back door, into the yard, pointing at the back gate.