by Janet Dailey
She looked away from his compelling male features. "I've never given anybody indigestion before." She was beginning to feel warm all over, but she forced a cool smile onto her lips.
"I don't think an alcoholic would consider the craving to be indigestion," Dirk taunted. "Besides, it's the lingering hangovers that I have trouble with."
His provocative insinuations were becoming more than she could handle. Across the room, Victoria spied a familiar face and immediately grasped at the straw of escape it offered.
"There's a girl across the way I went to college with, excuse me." She tried to move swiftly away.
"I'll come with you. I'd like to meet her," he stated.
"I'd rather you didn't," Victoria protested.
At that moment her father came to her rescue. "Dirk, would you come over here a minute?" he called to him from an adjoining group. "There's a gentleman here I'd like you to meet."
When Dirk hesitated, triumph glittered in her gray eyes. "Go, there might be a marvelous story there for your column."
Her father glanced at her with a teasing smile. "Stop monopolizing the man, Tory." And it was entirely the other way around.
"I wouldn't dream of it," she murmured tightly and nodded to Dirk before she weaved her way through the guests to the brunette she had seen minutes ago. A sixth sense told her Dirk hadn't followed. Before regret could set in she was being greeted by her old classmate.
"Tory! It's been ages!"
"How are you, Racine?" She hugged the slender brunette. "I didn't know you were going to be here."
"Paul and I just came up for the weekend. We're leaving Sunday." Racine Dalbert glanced across the room, her brown eyes shining in quiet speculation. "Who is that stunning man you were with?"
"Dirk Ramsey, a guest of my father's," Victoria replied.
"He looked more like your guest," her friend teased. "Gawd, but he's a handsome devil!"
"Is that any way for a bride of less than a year to talk?" she laughed brittlely.
"If Paul can look and admire a beautiful woman, I'm certainly going to give men like your friend the eye," Racine declared.
"I heard you bought a new house," Victoria changed the subject. "Have you redecorated it all yet?"
"I've tried," the vivacious woman admitted with an exaggerated impish look.
"What's it like? How many rooms?" She prompted.
Victoria sipped her champagne while Racine Dalbert began a lengthy description of her new home and the changes she had made. The conversation naturally led to the adjustments, mostly humorous, of married life. Dodging the question Racine directed at her Victoria kept her college friend talking. The champagne glass was emptied, but the caterer came around with a new tray and Victoria exchanged her empty glass for a full one.
She had barely taken two sips from it when it was taken out of her hand and offered to the brunette. There had been no warning of Dirk's approach until she saw him beside her. Her heart thumped wildly in reaction.
"Would you take this?" He forced the glass into Racine's hand. "Thank you. Excuse us, won't you?"
When the hand at her waist attempted to guide her away, Victoria resisted. "Dirk, this is my friend Racey Dalbert…Dirk Ramsey."
"Racey?" His eyebrow arched in questioning amusement.
"Short for Racine," the brunette explained with a throaty laugh. "In my single days it was considered a description." She flirted openly and without embarrassment. "This is the first time I've regretted being out of circulation."
"Racey," he repeated and eyed Victoria. "What did they call you? Miss Conservative?"
"How did you guess?" Racine laughed in surprise. "She isn't really, of course. I mean—"
"I know." A lazy smile played with the cornets of his mouth. "It was a pleasure meeting you."
"I'll talk to you later," Victoria promised, unable to dispute the pressure of his arm guiding her away.
"What a pair the two of you must have been," Dirk murmured when they were out of the brunette's hearing. "The tortoise and the hare."
"Racine was, of course, the hare," she replied thinly.
"And you were the snapping turtle," he finished.
"Where are you taking me?" she demanded.
But her question was answered before she had finished asking it. Dirk stopped in a dimly lit alcove of the room that was being used for dancing. He turned her easily into his arms and molded her close to his length.
"This is where I've been wanting you all evening." Dirk curved both of her hands around his neck and let his own slide down her arms, momentarily tangling his fingers in the loose weave of her shawl before they slid beneath to spread over her spine.
"Is it?" She felt weak, but she didn't blame the lethargy on the champagne she had consumed. It was caused by his swaying hips and the seductive pressure of his legs brushing against her thighs as they moved to the slow tempo of the music.
"You know it is." His dark head bent to nuzzle the hair near her temple.
That was too much. Victoria fought back the rising lump of excitement in her throat. Her breath was coming much too shallowly, so she took deeper ones to steady her nervous stomach. The action filled her sense with the earthy fragrance of his cologne and his own unique scent. One disturbance was being traded for another of equal potency.
She lifted her head, seeking to dispel the intimacy with conversation. "Why haven't you ever married?"
"I hadn't planned to get married for several years yet, not until after I became more established in my profession and could cut down on the traveling. Why?"
She couldn't meet his level gaze so she looked over his shoulder and shrugged indifferently. "Racine asked me and I didn't know the answer." She fingered the smooth collar of his jacket. "What happens if you fall in love before that time is up?" Victoria realized that she was intensely interested in his answers and tried not to show it.
"Did Racine arouse all this curiosity about my love life?"
"Of course," she lied.
"To answer your question, it would all depend on the girl, wouldn't it?" Dirk countered.
Something in his tone made her glance at him. His gaze seemed to burrow deep inside her and Victoria couldn't risk that kind of penetrating scrutiny, so she looked away again.
"I imagine it would," she agreed diffidently.
"What would happen if you fell in love with a poor man?" he challenged.
Her first reaction was a startled laugh. "What?"
"Is that so impossible?" Dirk questioned, and his gaze made an arcing sweep of the room. "I suppose it is unlikely since you only associate with your peers."
"I wouldn't judge a man by the money he has—or the lack of it," Victoria defended. "If I loved him I wouldn't care if he was rich or poor—or middle-class."
"Every girl has imagined her ideal mate. What's yours?"
It was a question that made Victoria think. "He would be intelligent, have a sense of humor, be gentle and strong." She hesitated, then added, "Most of all, he would love me."
"Anything else?" Dirk prompted. "What about his looks?"
"Do you mean—would he be tall, dark, and handsome?" A phrase that most aptly described him she realized as she flashed him a look through the sweep of her lashes. She succumbed to the urge to prick his arrogant conceit. "Or fair? Frankly, I don't care what he looks like. Handsome doesn't mean anything. Look at you."
His nostrils flared in a sharp breath of anger. "Are you trying to pick a fight?" Dirk accused, unconsciously tightening the circle of his arms to remind her who was stronger.
"Why would I do that?" she blinked innocently.
His mouth thinned into grimness as he suddenly released her to take hold of her wrist. "Let's get some air," he stated and pulled her along with him to a side door.
Too startled to protest, Victoria let herself be carried along. Once outside he released her arm and reached inside his jacket pocket for a cigarette. With a scrape of his thumbnail across a match head, he ignited a flame and ca
rried it to the tip of his cigarette. Shaking out the fire he exhaled a thin stream of smoke and stared into the star-strewn sky. He seemed to have forgotten she was there.
"I think I'll go back inside," she murmured and started to turn away.
"Oh, no, you don't!" His hand snaked out to seize her arm and pull her back, "You aren't going anywhere." Dirk dropped the freshly lit cigarette and crushed it under his heel. With a muffled groan he crushed her to his length, burying his face in her hair. "Don't you realize what you're doing to me?" he muttered savagely. "I've been one big ache since I met you."
The passion in his voice was so raw that Victoria couldn't believe she had aroused it. "No," she attempted to protest it.
"Yes!" he growled and smothered any response with his mouth.
He moved against her lips with harsh demand until they parted as he pressed her ever tighter into his embrace, as if seeking to absorb her body into his own. Victoria was lost to the scorching rush of emotion that swept through her. The exquisite pain of his fierce embrace tingled through every nerve end. While his hands began moving over her body his mouth followed the soft curves of her face.
The urgency of his need immediately became hers and her hands moved convulsively around his neck. The tumult within was a glorious thing, dazzling and brilliant. She arched ever closer to his thrusting length. Her unconditional surrender removed the pent-up anger from his caresses. They were just as demanding, but more deliberate. She felt him take a shuddering breath.
"I want you, Tory," Dirk mouthed the words against her cheek. "I need you." He changed the statement to a more descriptive sentence.
"Yes." Her voice echoed the husky pitch of his, and she was rewarded with a hard, short kiss. His hand slipped between them to cup her breast. It seemed to swell at his touch, straining against the material that confined it. Her heart felt as if it would burst.
Voices and laughter from inside filtered into the night. They both seemed to realize at the same time that anyone walking out the door would see them. By mutual consent, a small space was allowed to come between them as Dirk removed his hand from her breast to let his fingers caress her cheek and neck. The smoldering desire in his dark eyes kept the flames inside her burning hotly.
"Isn't there any place we can have some privacy?" he questioned thickly.
"I don't know where." She shook her head in a rueful negative.
"My God, what I wouldn't give for a car right now!" A smile twitched at his mouth. "What did couples do in the horse and buggy days? It would be hard to make love in a carriage with the driver watching."
"I suppose that's what enclosed buggys were for…and barns and haylofts," Victoria whispered.
"Where's the nearest barn?" He brushed his mouth against her lips and pulled away as if unable to be content with just a kiss.
"I have no idea."
"Have you had enough of this party?" he demanded. When she nodded he folded her hand inside the clasp of his. "Then let's get out of here."
"We'd better tell my parents," she reminded him.
"Don't you think they'll guess where we've disappeared?" he mocked, then shrugged. "We'll tell them."
When they returned inside Victoria saw her parents standing together on the edge of a group. They worked their way through the throng of guests to the side of the older couple.
"There you are," her mother smiled and glanced at the two of them in silent speculation.
"We're going to leave now," Victoria explained.
"We'll come with you," her father said. "Your mother and I were just looking for an excuse to leave, but we didn't feel right about leaving the two of you in the lurch." Without giving anyone an opportunity to speak he held up a hand. "You wait here and I'll call a carriage."
Victoria caught the flicker of irritation that flitted across Dirk's expression, but it was the only indication he gave that he wasn't pleased by the turn of events. Her mother sent her a veiled look of apology.
"Let's find Daphne, shall we?" Lena Beaumont suggested.
By the time they had convinced their hostess that they had truly enjoyed the party, the carriage had arrived to take them home. While her father kept up an easy flow of conversation during the ride, her mother seemed to be the only one who noticed that neither Dirk nor Victoria were contributing much. His arm was around her shoulder, absently massaging her bone in a sensual way. Victoria cast a sideways glance at him. How long had she known Dirk? A week? She shivered.
"Cold?" he murmured.
"A little." At least, her feet were, an age-old symptom of second thoughts.
But Dirk took her literally and nestled her more closely against his side. It didn't seem to help, not as much as Victoria thought it would. The carriage stopped in front of the main entrance to the house and Dirk helped her out. When her parents started toward the door Victoria would have followed, but Dirk held her back.
"We'll be in shortly," he told them calmly.
"What?" Her father gave him a blank look before sudden understanding dawned. "Oh, of course. Good night."
"Good night," Victoria responded as Dirk was already guiding her toward the iron gates to the breezeway.
Without speaking he escorted her through them. All the while her mind kept remembering his statement that he had no plans for getting married for several years yet. So what was he offering her in the meantime? An affair? Of what duration? The length of his stay with them? Or maybe he'd stop in to see her whenever he was in the vicinity? Could she be satisfied with such a casual commitment? Her feet were becoming lumps of ice.
Some of the spreading numbness must have crept into her dips because they were coolly unresponsive when he turned her into his arms and covered them with his own. His mouth moved persuasively against them. Her lips softened, but with a weak imitation of their previous yielding. Dirk lifted his head, a gathering frown darkening his expression.
"What's the matter?"
"I don't know. I…" How could she tell him without exposing herself to be hurt? "I think I'd better go inside."
"Victoria?" He caught her shoulders and stared incredulously into her face. "At the party, you wanted this moment?"
"Yes, I know," she admitted.
"Now you don't," he accused.
"I'm not sure."
"My God, first you're hot, then you're cold!" Dirk released her in a burst of irritation. "How do you turn it on and off like water faucets? Will you tell me? I would really like to know. Is it some secret? Because it doesn't work that way with me."
His anger was justified, but it didn't make it sting any less. "Maybe I just want to know where I stand?" Victoria challenged.
"What does that mean?" he demanded. "Do you expect me to get down on my knees and beg for the privilege to make love to you? Am I supposed to swear some undying allegiance? Who does the giving and who does the taking, Victoria? Maybe that's something that I should know, too."
She stared at him wordlessly, a terrible pain shattering through her body. There wasn't anything she could say, so she pivoted toward the sliding glass doors. Again Dirk caught at her arm, but Victoria wouldn't turn around, aware of the tears filling her eyes, and he didn't make her face him.
"Just what the hell do you expect from me?" he declared.
Victoria had to fight to get the word out of her pain-taut throat, but she finally succeeded. "Nothing."
He let her go and she glided across the stone floor to the living-room entrance. Once inside the house, she didn't stop until she had climbed the stairs to her room. She undressed in the dark and fumbled in the closet to hang up her dress. Yanking the pins from her hair, she found the physical pain a welcome counterbalance to the emotional anguish tearing her apart inside. Victoria brushed her hair until her scalp hurt before finally going in search of her nightgown. It eluded her in the dark.
The sound of footsteps mounting the stairs froze her beside the dresser. She didn't make a sound to draw Dirk's attention to her bedroom. Yet his quiet tread approached her door
. The knob turned and the door was pushed open. Victoria was unaware that she was framed by the moonlight streaming in through the window. She was only conscious of the dark shadow that loomed in her doorway.
"I'll scream," she threatened in a voice that was lower than a whisper.
If he had said one word to her she probably would have raced into his arms. Instead, his shadow receded and the door swung closed. Rejection rooted her to the floor as Victoria listened to him walk to his room. Silently, she walked to her door and turned the lock. Forgetting the nightgown she hadn't found, she went to her bed and crawled under the covers where she cried silently.
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Chapter Ten
VICTORIA SPENT LONG, sleepless hours trying to decide whether she had made a mistake. She couldn't make up her mind whether her decision had been right or wrong. Either way, she was convinced she would have experienced the same anguish and doubt.
As a result, she awakened feeling more wretched than she had the night before. A glance in the mirror while she was brushing her teeth revealed that she looked worse than she felt. It took a series of cold water compresses to fade the redness in her eyes and dissolve their puffiness. Heavy makeup hid the rest of the damage from her restless night.
Dressed in a pair of red jeans and a striped top, Victoria was about to leave her room when she heard a carriage stop in front of the house. She glanced out the window as the driver alighted from his seat. Briefly she wondered where her parents were going this morning as she walked out the door.
From the top of the stairs she could see everyone gathered in the foyer below, her parents, Penny, and the housekeeper. Was everyone leaving, she wondered with a frown and started down the steps. Then she saw the luggage stacked beside the door and Dirk shaking hands with her father.
"What's going on?" Her sharp question drew everyone's gaze, including Dirk's. His expression looked as grim as she felt. When she looked into his dark eyes she had the sensation of falling into a black, bottomless well. At the same time it felt as if her heart was plummeting all the way to her toes.