"Liyo-"
"I would not have you believing that I knew Roh's nature. I would not have you thinking I sent you against him, knowing that. I did not. I did not,Vanye."
"Now you have rne between two oaths. Oh Heaven, liyo.I was thinking of Roh's life, and now I am afraid of winning it. I do not… I swear I do not try to pull against your good sense. I do not want that. Liyo,protect yourself. I should never have questioned you; this is not how I would have persuaded you. Do not listen to me."
"I know my own mind. Do not shoulder everything." She tossed her head back, thin-lipped, and looked at him. "This is Nehmin. Yon will see it as I have seen it; I am not anxious to spill blood in this place. We are far from Andur-Kursh… far from every grudge it had… and I pity him. I pity him, even as Liell-though that is harder: I knew his victims. Give me time to think. Go to sleep a while. Please. There is at least something of the night left, and you look so tired."
"Aye," he agreed, though it was less for weariness than that he would not dispute her, not now.
She gave him the mat by the east wall, her own. He lay down there with no real desire of sleep; but the ease it gave sent a sudden heaviness on him, so that he cared not evento move. She drew the blanket farther, over him, and sat on the mat beside him, leaned there against the post, her hand over his. He shivered for no reason-if he had taken a chill he was too numb to feel it. He let his breath go, flexed his fingers against hers, enclosed them.
Then he slept, a hard, swift darkness.
Chapter Fifteen
She was gone in the morning. There was food there, milk and bread and butter, and slices of cold meat. Written in a dab of butter on the side of the pitcher was a Kurshin symbol, the glyph that began Morgaine.
Safe,she meant. He ate, more than he had thought he could; and there was water heated for him over the coals. He bathed, and shaved… with his own razor, for his personal kit was there: they had recovered it from Mai, surely; and his bow was laid there with his armor, and other things that he had thought forever lost. He was glad-and dismayed, to think that they might have risked themselves, she and Lellin and Sezar, to recover them.
But her own weapons were still standing in the corner, and it began to trouble him that she stayed so long, unarmed. He went outside, unarmored, to see whether she was in sight: Siptah was gone too, though the harness was not.
Then a movement caught his eye, and he saw her coming back, riding down the slope, bareback on the gray horse, a strange figure in her white garments. She slid down and wrapped the tether-line over a branch, for she had been riding with only the halter. Her face had held a worried look for an instant; but she put on a different face when she looked up at him… he saw it and answered it with a faint smile, quickly shed.
"We have a little trouble from the outside this morning," she said. "They are trying us."
"Is that the way to go looking for it?" He had not meant his voice to be so sharp, but she shrugged and took no affront. The frown came back to her eyes, and they fixed beyond, back the way she had come.
He looked. Three arrhahad followed her, and a Man walked with them, a tall man in green and brown, coming from the shadow of the trees.
It was Roh.
They brought him to the front of the shelter and stopped: they laid no hand on Roh in their bringing him, but he had no weapons either. "Thank you," Morgaine told the arrha,dismissing them; but they withdrew only as far as the rocks near the shelter.
And Roh bowed, as lord visiting hall-lord, with weary irony.
"Come inside," Morgaine bade him.
Roh came, passed the curtain which Vanye held aside for him. His face was pale, unshaven-and afraid, although he tried not to show it. He did not look as if he had slept.
"Sit down," Morgaine invited him, herself settling to the mat by the brazier, and Roh did so on the opposite side, crosslegged. Vanye sank down on his heels at Morgaine's shoulder, an ilin'splace, which said what it might to Roh. Changeling,he thought uneasily, for the sword was unattended in the corner, and Morgaine unarmed: he had at least placed himself as a barrier between Roh and that.
"Chya Roh," Morgaine said softly. "Are you well?"
A muscle jerked in Roh's jaw. "Well enough."
"It took me some argument to bring you here. The arrhawere minded otherwise."
"You usually obtain what you want."
"Vanye did speak for you-and well.. None could be more persuasive with me. But counting all that-and my gratitude for your help to him, Chya Roh i Chya-are we other than enemies? Roh or Liell, you have no love for me. You hate me bitterly. That was so in Ra-koris. Are you the kind of man who can change his mind that thoroughly?"
"I hoped you would be dead."
"Ah. Truth from you. That does surprise me. And then what would you?"
"The same that I did. I would have stayed…" His eyes shifted to Vanye's and locked, and his voice changed. "I would have stayed with you and tried to reason with you. But… that is not how it came out, is it, cousin?"
"And now?" Morgaine asked.
Roh gave a haggard grin, made a loose gesture of the hands. "My situation is rather grim, is it not? Of course I offer you my service. I should be mad not to. I do not think that you have any intention of accepting; you are hearing me now to satisfy my cousin's sensibilities; and I am talking to you because I have nothing left to do."
"Because Merir and the arrhaturned a deaf ear to you last night?"
Roh blinked dazedly. "Well, you did not expect me not to try that, did you?"
"Of course not. Now what else will you try? Harm Vanye, who trusts you? Perhaps you would not; I almost believe that. But me you never loved, not in any shape you have worn. When you were Zri you betrayed your king, your clan, all those men… when you were Liell, you drowned children, and made of Leth such a plague-spot, such a sink of deprav-ity-"
Terror shot into Roh's eyes, horror. Morgaine stopped speaking, and Roh sat visibly shivering… gone, all pretense of cynicism. Vanye looked on him and hurt, and set his hand on Morgaine's shoulder, wishing her to let him be; but she did not regard it.
"You do not like it," she murmured. 'That is what Vanye said-that you had bad dreams."
"Cousin," Roh pleaded.
"I shall not call it back for you," she said. "Peace. Roh… Roh…I shall say nothing more of it. Be at peace."
Roh's hands, shaking, covered his face; he rested so a moment, white and sick, and she let him be. "Give him drink," she said. Vanye took the flask she indicated with a glance, and knelt and offered it to him. Roh took it with trembling hands, drank a little. When he was done, Vanye did not leave him, but held to his shoulder.
"Are you all right now?" Morgaine asked him. "Roh?" But he would not look at her. "I have done you more harm than I wished," she said. "Forgive me, Chya Roh."
He said nothing. She rose then, and took Changelingfrom the corner… withdrew from the shelter entirely.
Roh did not look at that, nor at anything. "I can kill him," he breathed between his teeth, and shuddered. "I can kill him. I can kill him."
For a moment it made no sense, the rambling of a madman; and then Vanye understood, and kept hold of him. "Cousin," he said in Roh's ear. "Roh. Stay with me. Stay with me."
Sanity returned after a moment Roh breathed hard and bowed his head against his knees.
"Roh, she will not do that again. She saw. She will not."
"I would be myself when I die. Can she not allow me that?"
"You will not die. I know her. I knowher. She would not."
"She will manage it. Do you think that she will ever let me at her back where you stand, or rest when I am near her? She will manage it."
The veil shadowed, went back. Morgaine stood in the doorway. "I am afraid I hear you," she said quietly. "The veils do not stop much."
"I will say it to your face," Roh said, "syllable by syllable if you did not get it clear. -Will you not return the courtesy, to me-and to him?"
Morgaine frowned, re
sted Changelingpoint down on the floor before her. "I will say this: that there is some good chance it will make no difference what I will and will not." She nodded vaguely westward, at the other wall. "If you want to walk through that woods and take a look at the riverside, you will find enough Shiua to make any quarrel we have among ourselves quite pointless. What I say I would say if Vanye were not involved. The kindnesses I attempt generally come to worse than my worst acts. But murder sits ill with me, and,…" She lifted Changelingslightly from the floor and rested it again. "I have not the options of fair fight that a man has; nor would I put that burden on Vanye, to deal with you in that fashion. You are right; I cannot trust you as I do him. I do not think I could ever be persuaded to that. I do not want you at my back. But we have mutual enemies out there. There is a land about us that does not deserve that plague on it… and you and I made it, did we not? You and I created that horde. Will you share in stopping it? The fortunes of war-may make it unnecessary to concern ourselves about our… differences."
Roh seemed dazed a moment… and then he set his hands on his knees and laughed bitterly. "Yes. Yes, I would do that."
"I will not ask an oath of you or take one, no great one: it would bind me to an honor I cannot afford. But if you will give your simple word, Roh-I trust youcan bind your other impulses."
"I give it," Roh said. He rose, and Vanye with him. "You will have what you want of me. All…that you want of me."
Morgaine's lips tightened. She turned and walked to the far wall and laid down Changeling,gathering up her armor. "Do not be too forward in it. There is food left, probably. Vanye, see he has what he needs."
"My weapons," Roh said.
She looked at him, scowling. "Aye, I will see to that." And she turned again and began working into her armor.
"Morgaine kri Chya."
She looked up.
"You… did not bring me from Ra-koris; I brought myself, I. You did not aim that horde at this land. I did, no other. And I will not take food or drink or shelter of you, not as matters stand. If you insist, I must; but if not-then I will take it elsewhere, and not inflict any obligation on myself or on you."
She hesitated, seeming stunned. Then she walked over and flung back the veil to the outside, waved a signal at the arrhawho waited there. Roh left, pausing to offer a bow of courtesy; Morgaine let fall the veil after him, and lingered there, leaning her head against her arm. After a moment she swore, in her own tongue, and turned away, avoiding his eyes.
"You," Vanye said into that silence, "you did as much as he would have asked of you."
She looked up at him. "But you expect more."
Vanye shook his head. "I regard you too much, liyo.You are risking your life in giving what you have. He could kill you. I do not think so, or I would not have him near you. But he is a risk; and I know how you feel. Maybe more so. He is my cousin. He brought me here alive. But… if… he is overmuch tempted, liyo,then he will lose. I know that. What is more, he does. You have done the best thing you could do."
She bit her lips until the blood left them. "He is a man, your cousin. I will give him that."
And she turned and gathered up the rest of her armor, put it on with a grimace of discomfort. "He will have his chance," she said then. "Armor and bow: little use for anything else if this is like the last time… until they reach the rock itself. We are in no small danger."
"They are prepared?"
"Some of them are well up the Silet, the tributary river to our south; the force at Narnside began moving across to our bank at dawn."
"You permit this?"
She gave a bitter laugh. "I? Permit? I fear I am not in charge here. The arrhahave permitted it, step by step, until we are nigh surrounded. Powerful they are, but their whole mind, their whole conception of the problem, is toward defense, and they will not hear me. I would have done differently, yes, but I have not been able to do anything until recently. Now it comes to the point that the only thing I can do is help them hold this place. It has never been a matter of what I would choose here."
He bent and gathered his armor from where he had left it.
They saddled the horses, not alone Siptah, but Lellin's and Sezar's, and gathered up all that they might need if it came to flight. What was in Morgaine's mind remained her own; but he reckoned in his own thoughts what she had told him, the isolation by wood and water of the area that was Nehmin, and the Shiua possessing the rivers that framed their refuge.
All the area about them was tangled and wooded, and that was a situation no Kurshin could find comfortable; there was no place to maneuver, no place to run. The horses were all but useless to them, and the hill was too low to hold.
They rode up the slope of the hill and among the twisted trees, down again by the winding trail among the rocks, so that they came out again on the meadow.
"No sight of them," Vanye muttered, looking uneasily riverward.
"Ah, they have learned a slight caution of this place. But it will not last, I fear."
She turned Siptah to the right hand, and warily they rode away from that vicinity into the woods, through brush, into an area where the trees grew very large. A path guided them… and our enemies next,Vanye thought dismally. Horses had been down it recently.
"Liyo,"he said after a space. "Where do we go? What manner of thing have you in mind?"
She shrugged, and seemed worried. "The arrhahave withdrawn. And they are not above abandoning us to the enemy. I am concerned for Lellin and Sezar. They have not reported back to me. I do not like to take their horses from where they expect to find them, but likewise I do not want to lose them."
"They are out there-toward the enemy?"
"That is where they should be. At the moment, I am concerned that the arrhaare not where they should be."
"And Roh."
"And Roh," she echoed, "though in some part I doubt he is the center of this matter. He may himself be in danger. Merir… Merir is the one who deserves watching. Honorable he may be-but thee learns, Vanye, thee learns… that the good and virtuous fight us as bitterly as those who are neither good nor virtuous… more so, perhaps-for they do so unselfishly, and bravely , . . and we must most of all beware of them. Do you not see that I am what the Shiua name me? And would a man not be entitled to resist that… for himself-most of all for what the arrhendprotects? -Forgive me. Thee knows my darker moods; I should not shed them on thee."
"I am your man, liyo."
She looked at him, surprised out of the bitterness that had been her expression.
And around the bending of the trail there stood one of the arrha,a young qhalurwoman. Silent, she stood among the branches and ferns, light in green shadow.
"Where are your fellows?" Morgaine asked of her.
The arrhalifted her arm, pointed the way that they were going.
Morgaine started Siptah forward again, slowly, for the trail wound much. Vanye looked back; the arrhastill stood there, a too-conspicuous sentinel.
Then they passed into another space where few trees grew, and in that open space there were horses; the arrhendimwere there, seated… the six who had gone out with Merir, and Roh. Roh gathered himself to his feet as they came.
"Where is Merir?" Morgaine asked.
"Off that way," Roh said, and pointed farther on. He spoke in Andurin, and looked up… shaven, washed, he looked more the dai-uyohe was, and he bore his weapons again. "No one is doing anything. Word is the Shiua are closing on us from two sides, and the old men are still back there talking. If no one moves, we will have Hetharu in our midst before evenfall."
"Come," said Morgaine, and slid down from the saddle. "We leave the horses here." She wrapped Siptah's reins about the branch, and Vanye did the same for the horse he rode and the ones he led.
None of the arrhendimhad done more than look up.
"Come," she bade them; and in a stronger voice: "Come with me."
They looked uncertain; Larrel and Kessun stood up, but the elder arrhendimwere reluctant. F
inally Sharrn did so, and the six came, gathering up their weapons.
Wherever they were bound, Morgaine seemed to have been this way before; Vanye stayed at her shoulder, that Roh should not walk too near her, watching either side and sometimes looking back at the arrhendimwho trailed them on this suddenly narrower path. He was far from easy in his mind, for they were all too vulnerable to treachery, for all the power of the weapons Morgaine bore.
Gray stone confronted them through the tangle of vines and branches… lichen-spotted, much weathered, standing stones thrust up among the roots of trees, closer and closer, until the stones formed an aisle shadowed by the vast trees.
Then they had sight of a small stone dome at the end of that aisle. Arrhaguarded the entry of it, one on either side of the doorway that stood open, but there was no offer to oppose their coming.
Voices echoed within, echoes that died away at their tread within the doorway. Torches lit that small dome within; arrhasat as a mass of white on stone seats that encompassed more than half the circuit of the walls: the center of the floor was clear, and there Merir stood. Merir was the one who had been speaking and he faced them there.
One of the arrhaarose, an incredibly old qhal,withered and bent and leaning on a staff. He stepped down onto the floor where Merir stood.
"You do not belong here," that one said. "Arms have never come into this council. We ask that you go away."
Morgaine did nothing. A look of fear was on all the arrha…old ones, very old, all those gathered here.
"If we contest for power," said another, "we will all die. But there are others who hold the power we have. Leave."
"My lord Merir." Morgaine walked from the doorway to the center of the room; Vanye followed her: so did the others, taking their place before that council. His distress was acute, that she thus separated herself from the door. There were guards, arrha,bearing Gate-force, he suspected. He could not prevail against that. If it came to using her weapons she needed him close to her, where he was able to guard her back… where he was not in the way of what had taken at least one comrade of theirs. "My lords," she said, looking about her. "There are enemies advancing. What do you plan to do?"
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