A Nurse, a Surgeon, a Christmas Engagement
Page 4
“Okay, then.” He didn’t quite agree, but he let her have this one. “And I think no emotional attachment is a pretty obvious one. Anything else?”
When she shook her head, he brought the conversation back to getting to know each other by asking, “So, what brought you to Nashville?”
Lena grumbled low enough Dex didn’t catch her words.
“What was that?”
Her fingers traced little designs in the condensation on her water glass, and he thought maybe she was going to blow off another answer, when she finally did speak. “A relationship gone horribly wrong and my freaking father’s inability to be faithful to my mother—both of which ruined not only my personal life but spilled over into my professional life as well.”
“That sounds like a loaded topic.”
Her bottom lip quivered a bit and she sucked in a shaky breath. But thankfully, she didn’t burst into tears. He wasn’t so great with tears.
“He makes me so angry I can barely think straight.”
“Your dad or your ex?”
“Both.” She shrugged. “My ex only dated me because I was the medical director’s daughter and being with me got him closer to the man who could—and did—advance his career.”
“How long ago did that end?” The wound still seemed raw from his perspective. He just wasn’t sure which man had caused her the most pain.
“April.”
Less than a year. Considering the timeline, Lena was doing far better than he’d been at the same point. Jessie had broken him for a long while. He could relate to a relationship gone wrong if she’d just open up and tell him about it.
“And your dad?”
“My father, well, other than repeatedly cheating on my mother with women half his age—including my best friend while I was dealing with the worst breakup of my life, by the way? He’s a cold, overbearing jerk who expects total obedience and has standards so high that an Olympic high jumper couldn’t reach them.”
Clearly any conversation about her family would be a touchy one. He couldn’t quite decide if she was more angry or hurt by father, but their relationship wasn’t good. What sort of dad slept with his daughter’s best friend? And for that matter, what sort of friend slept with their best friend’s dad? Was the friend climbing the career ladder by climbing Lena’s father? He’d ask, but Lena had made it crystal clear that she was ready for happier topics.
He’d struck out on trying to start a conversation twice. Maybe the third time would be the charm and he’d finally get some insight into what made her tick.
“Are you an only child?”
She nodded. “I am. What about you? I know you have a brother since you need a date for his wedding. Is it just the two of you?”
Her answer was exactly what he’d expected to hear. The familial obligation he’d only seen with only children. People with siblings, in his experience, were more likely to tell their parents when they needed to back off and would even walk away if it became necessary.
“Oldest of three boys, actually. The one closest in age to me, Tommy, is getting married to the literal girl next door. And I should probably go ahead and tell you that Jill is my ex’s younger sister.”
Lena raised a brow in surprise.
“Small town.” He shrugged.
“Does that bother you?”
Tommy had asked him the same thing before he’d ever asked Jill out the first time. He couldn’t blame Jill for Jessie’s actions, though. That wouldn’t have been fair to her. “Nah. Jill is nothing like Jessie. And if my brother is happy, then I’m happy.”
“You said there were three of you?”
“My baby brother, Wade, is a senior at the University of Tennessee this year.”
“I always wanted a brother or a sister.” Wistfulness softened her voice. “But apparently I did so much damage to my mother’s figure that she was unwilling to do that again.”
Dex desperately wanted to lighten the mood. He tried a little joke. “You can have one of mine. I have a spare.”
She snorted at his offer, and he could see she was trying desperately to hold back a smile.
The laughter in her eyes contradicted everything he thought he knew, and she was quickly becoming a code he was determined to break. Behind the laughter, there was a sadness that lingered in her eyes, and she often looked like she held the weight of the world in her slim fingers.
He wanted to make her smile for a bit. To chase the shadows out of her gaze and hear her laugh while she relaxed in his arms.
* * *
Lena shifted and her leg bumped into Dex’s under the table. Even sitting in a booth, he had managed to spread himself out and take up so much space. The way his shoulders filled out those navy-blue scrub tops had fueled more than a few fantasies since she’d moved to Nashville. She fought against a blush as the memory of one of those fantasies popped into her mind.
Even in scrubs, Dex oozed masculinity. Tonight, in khakis and a button-down shirt, an air of power surrounded him, not unlike what she’d come to associate with her father and her ex-boyfriend. But with Dex, she didn’t feel like being female made her less.
She’d have to examine that thought in more detail when Dex didn’t sit so near she could barely breathe. She’d been hoping to find something about him that she hated. Some little detail that confirmed her suspicions of him being too much like her father, maybe. Or anything that reminded her of Connor allowing her to push him firmly back onto the “men she’d never date” list.
Dex was in line to be head of general surgery when the current head retired. It was common knowledge at Metro Memorial that Dr. Miller had been grooming Dex to take his place by letting Dex take a leadership role within the department. Like her ex, Dex would be in a position of power. In a decade, he’d be running a hospital, just like her father. Powerful men caused powerful problems for the women in their lives. Lena could not allow herself to forget that.
But here he sat, smiling that gorgeous smile of his, doing something incredibly sweet by offering to share his siblings with her. While he surely meant it in a teasing way, she couldn’t help but find the gesture endearing.
What was wrong with her?
“It’s so kind of you to share,” Lena deadpanned.
Dex laughed. “Consider it self-care. If he has someone else to pick on, then I get a break.”
The delicious sound rolled over her, tempting her to want things that a fake relationship could never provide. Lena swallowed hard, fighting to regain her control and perspective. Fake meant she walked away unscathed. Real meant the consequences were equally as real. And she refused to do real.
“Which brother are you talking about?” She needed to get the conversation on something light, something that wouldn’t be too tempting, because she couldn’t take much more tonight. If he pushed her one way or the other, she might break.
“Both.” He shrugged. “Either. You’ll see when we get to Westfield.”
“Tell me about them. Or about your parents,” she suggested. Dex didn’t seem to mind talking about his family. Starting there meant she didn’t have to open up just yet. She’d left LA to get away from the embarrassment of everything that happened with Connor and her father and to escape his influence, and bringing them up and talking about their actions felt like tempting fate and potentially destroying even more of the peace she’d found here in Tennessee.
While they ate, Dex launched into a lively description of his parents and his hometown, and Lena had to squash down the envy. His narrative portrayed the idyllic childhood she’d only seen on television. From hiking in the Smoky Mountains with his parents, to trying all the touristy attractions in the area, every story spoke of a family with a solid and loving commitment to each other.
By comparison, her family had been a dysfunctional mess hidden behind a cosmetic front of perfection. Their family vacat
ion spots were chosen for their exclusivity and her parents’ enjoyment, never her own. Memories of her parents involving her in any sort of family-style entertainment slipped through her mind like wispy clouds pushed by a stiff breeze. When none cemented into a solid recollection, she released a deep sigh.
“You don’t have a single bad story, do you?”
Dex had the type of family Lena had always wanted. When Dex talked about his family, love warmed his voice like a perfect cup of hot cocoa, and Lena had never had that. Might never have that if she couldn’t find it in her to trust a man enough to have a family.
“Uh... Nothing much. We’ve had our squabbles through the years, but what family doesn’t? Nothing we couldn’t work out.” He grinned at her. “There was this one time that my dad and I...”
Dex launched into a story about how he and his dad had pulled a series of pranks on his younger brothers, and her heart hurt. She’d be willing to bet that his father would never have slept with a woman under his employ, nor ruined the woman’s career when the relationship went sideways. And from his description of his mother, she’d bet Mrs. Henry would not have ignored being cheated on and certainly would never have just gone on with her life as if it never happened. The man sitting across from her would never have to fear what his own father might do to his career, and he’d certainly never have to move across the country to get away from his father’s influence.
But the worst part, the part Lena was really struggling to reconcile, was her dad sleeping with her best friend. During the absolute worst months of her life, she’d had no one to talk to. Her mother turned her away, dismissing her and her emotions like an unwanted telemarketer. And her best friend, the girl she’d grown up with and trusted with all her secrets, had slept with her father until he tossed her aside like yesterday’s leftovers. And so then Lena had lost her best friend as well. It had been a long and lonely spring for her and she’d jumped into the travel nurse gig without a second thought—anything to get her away from California and the negativity that abounded there. Her memories weighed heavy on her, her heart aching like she’d been stabbed.
Swallowing hard, she blinked hard at the tears that all the thoughts of her upbringing and more recent turmoil had brought up. As she blinked, a tear dripped from her eye and slid down her cheek.
She should have canceled this fake date. Her nerves were already on edge after losing Mr. Clemons this afternoon, and her emotions couldn’t handle being this close to a man like Dex—completely her opposite in so many ways and yet somehow drawing her in like waves to the shore.
Despite a smooth surgery with Dex, her day had been a roller coaster full of unexpected twists and emotions. A sweet elderly man had come through surgery yesterday looking like a champ, only to code that afternoon on her watch. He’d been alone, never married, no children, and it had hit Lena hard that she was staring down her own future. The thought hit her again that she might never have a child of her own, and her lower lip quivered.
“Hey, are you okay?” A warm hand covered hers.
Embarrassment washed over her. She met his gaze, feeling super self-conscious about how he caught her mired in the depths of her thoughts. “Yeah, sorry. I got lost in my own head for a minute.”
Worry highlighted the gold flecks in his dark eyes. The weight of his hand over hers was warm and solid. Comforting. And when he spoke, his soft tone soothed her more than the teasing words themselves could have ever done. “I’ve never bored a woman to tears before.”
“Well, you can’t say that any longer.” She laughed as she swiped at the stray tear on her cheek.
“Wanna talk about what’s really bothering you?”
She searched his face, surprised to find genuine concern there. “Not at the moment,” she finally answered. “Your childhood sounds perfect.”
“I was lucky.” His thumb rubbed circles on the back of her hand until she pulled away. That simple touch sparked a far too tempting awareness that radiated from the skin on her hand all the way down deep into her core. The attentiveness he showed was quite honestly the most irresistible feature she’d seen in a man in a long time now.
She needed a distraction. Something to take her mind off how every nerve in her body stood up and took notice of his touch. A television mounted to the wall behind him played a professional basketball game. She focused her gaze on the screen while she tried to pull herself together. Usually she could stare at something from a distance and put her emotions in check in the process. But this time, it wasn’t working. Not even a little.
“I’m sorry. Could you take me back to my car?” She covered her plate with her napkin. She had to get out of there before she lost all control over her emotions. “I’d really like to go home.”
Shock briefly crossed over his face before he schooled his expression back to neutral, but to his credit, Dex didn’t question her decision to end their evening. He merely waved the server over and asked for the check. Within a couple minutes, they were out the door and on the way back to the hospital.
Several times, she saw him glance in her direction as he drove. He had to be thinking she was a nutjob. But she was on the verge of tears and she did not want to break down in front of him. And if she didn’t get away from him soon, that’s exactly what would happen.
“Where are you parked?” he asked as he turned his SUV into the parking garage.
“Exit side of level three.”
When they got to her level, she pointed out her car and he slowed to a stop near her trunk.
“Thanks for dinner,” she murmured, reaching out to grab the door handle.
“Hang on a second.” Dex hit the lock button to keep her door from opening.
“What are you...?” She stared over at him in confusion.
“I thought tonight was going well, but then you just shut me out.” His frustrated sigh filled the SUV. “What happened back there? Did I do something wrong? Say something that upset you?”
Lena shook her head, trying hard not to cry.
“I’m trying to wrap my head around how this went downhill so fast. This isn’t going to work if you don’t talk to me. We go see either of our families like this and it’s gonna look like we’ve been fighting the whole trip.”
“I know. I just...” She choked back a sob. If she started crying, she might not be able to stop. Holding it together until she got away from him was the only hope she had to keep from embarrassing herself beyond recovery. “I can’t tonight, Dex.”
“Okay, well, if you aren’t in, if you can’t stand to be around me for even a single evening, then let me know, sooner rather than later, because I need time to come up with a new plan before Tommy and Jill’s wedding.” When she nodded, he unlocked the doors. “Good night, Lena.”
She moved to shrug out of his blazer and he stilled her with a hand on her shoulder.
“Keep it until you get your own. You need it more than I do right now.”
She got out of the SUV and closed the door. Dex waited until she’d gotten in and started her car before he pulled away.
Sitting in her car, she sucked in several deep breaths. She tried to be strong, really, she did, but now that she was alone there was no stopping the tears. They burst out of her like water spilling from a dam, cascading down her face. She leaned her head against the steering wheel and let the sobs punch through the remnants of the walls she’d surrounded herself with.
Today had taught her something—she did not want to spend the rest of her life alone, even if she had argued that point with her parents more than once. She didn’t want to be eighty and have no one to miss her when she was gone.
A rap on the glass sent her heart straight out of her chest and into orbit.
She trembled as she looked toward the window at her side.
Dex.
He yanked the door open the second she hit Unlock, grabbing her hand and tugging
her out of the car and into a gentle embrace. “Tell me what I did to cause this. Lena, I really have no idea.”
She swiped at her tears with the sleeve of his jacket. Great, not only was Dex witnessing her breakdown firsthand, he thought he’d caused it.
“That patient we lost today,” she found herself confessing on a sob. “It was like looking at the Ghost of Christmas Future—no family, no friends, just him alone and dying at Christmas with no one to miss him when he was gone.”
“That’s not your future.” Dex pulled her in closer. She sank into his warmth, her heart fluttering at his nearness. His touch made the world around them fade, and suddenly the future seemed less bleak. He murmured reassurances as he rubbed his hand up and down her back. “One day you will find someone who makes your heart skip a beat. He’ll sweep you off your feet when you least expect it. You won’t be alone. I know it.”
Why did he have to be such a nice guy? Making it through the next two weeks at his side would be a lot less scary if he wasn’t the antithesis of everything she’d assumed he’d be. Yes, he was arrogant and powerful. But he was also thoughtful and kind. He came back after dropping her off to make sure she was okay and if that wasn’t a sign of true character, she didn’t know what would be.
As a result, a single question currently dominated her mind—if Dex treated a virtual stranger like this, how would he treat the woman he gave his heart?
CHAPTER FOUR
A FEW DAYS LATER, Dex wandered around Green Hills Mall, looking for the perfect Christmas gifts for his family. He normally made sure to get his shopping done long before Thanksgiving and the nightmare of Black Friday, but time had gotten away from him this year and with less than two weeks before Christmas, he’d had no choice but to make another attempt at the mall in December. The memory of the little old lady who had not only snatched a sweater out of his hand but then smacked him with her purse for protesting held a spot in his mind any time he got near a crowded mall, even though years had passed since that incident.