by C. Fonseca
Eleanor teetered backwards and grasped Alexa’s shoulders.
Alexa’s hands moved down to Eleanor’s hips, to steady her. “Whoa that was nice…more than nice, actually,” she murmured and asked softly, “Are you okay?”
“I’m good, thanks,” Eleanor said. She was still reeling from her steamy response to Alexa’s kiss.
Alexa’s smile was inviting and playful. “As you know, I have a guest room, but I’d be happy for us to share my room.”
Eleanor ran her hands through her hair. Their kiss had her light-headed. Longing sent a slow burn through her entire being. Once Alexa had drawn attention to the two bedrooms, Eleanor had assumed they’d be sleeping separately. What now? Had Alexa presumed all along they’d sleep together tonight?
Alexa whispered into her ear, “Eleanor, bed?”
Eleanor wanted to reach up, pull down Alexa’s head, and kiss that self-assured smile off her face. Alexa was infuriatingly sure of herself.
Eleanor recalled Alexa’s earlier words about her transient lifestyle; how she must want to have fun, live it up before heading back overseas on her next assignment. Eleanor hadn’t corrected her. Did Alexa think that she was someone who regularly engaged in brief sexual liaisons? Or perhaps that was what Alexa wanted. Impermanence. It may have been true for Eleanor in the past, but she was tired of one-night stands and soulless connections.
“Well. Shall we?” Alexa turned her lips up in what could only be called a smirk.
Eleanor’s uncertainty about what she wanted and what Alexa expected was all it took to change her mood. “I’m really tired. I’m afraid I wouldn’t be great company.” What a lame excuse. She took a deep breath and resisted her desire to grab Alexa’s sweatshirt and to hang on to it.
Disappointed and irritated with herself, Eleanor gently pushed Alexa away, turned around, and took the few steps to the blanket box where she’d placed her rucksack. She picked up her bag and started walking towards the guest room. Alexa must think I’m a complete twit—it’s not as though I didn’t kiss her back. Eleanor stopped and turned back. She lifted her chin, forcing herself to meet Alexa’s gaze. “Thank you.”
Alexa had her arms crossed as she stood and watched Eleanor, a bemused look on her face. “What for?”
Eleanor involuntarily took a step closer. “Driving me all over Chewton and Castlemaine. For bringing me here, sharing your beautiful cottage, cooking me supper, my delicious hot chocolate—”
“Stop, please.” Alexa uncrossed her arms and held up her hands. “Thank you for coming along. I—”
They both looked at the ceiling. The rain had returned, and what sounded like hail pounded against the side of the house.
Alexa hitched her shoulders. “So much for the abating storm. I should have brought you here in better weather.”
“Even the weather bureau can’t always make accurate predictions. How were you to know?”
“You’re really sweet.” Alexa leaned forward and pressed her lips to Eleanor’s cheek.
With this small gesture, the tension melted from Eleanor’s shoulders. Maybe she hadn’t short-circuited their friendship.
“Why don’t you go ahead and use the bathroom?” Alexa asked. “I’ll batten down the hatches and turn off the lights.”
“Thank you…if you’re sure?”
“If you’re sure?” Alexa gazed at her for a moment, then nodded towards the bathroom. “Go on.”
She was at the door when Alexa called with a soft, mellow tone, “Oh, Eleanor?”
Eleanor gripped the rucksack handles; a tremor of indecision had her questioning what she’d do if Alexa asked her again. No. She wouldn’t let Alexa sway her resolve. She turned around. “Yes?”
“I’ll stack the fire, but it may get cold during the night. Do you need a hot water bottle?”
“Thank you. I’ll be fine. I’m a warm sleeper.” That is if I actually get any sleep.
Alexa’s mouth tilted in a smile. “The cottage is stone, but these inner dividing walls are paper-thin. Give me a call if you change your mind.” She hesitated before saying, “Goodnight, Eleanor.”
Eleanor couldn’t even hear her own voice, for the thumping in her chest when she whispered, “’Night, Alexa.”
Chapter 12
Whispering motions
Rain had pelted all night long. The radio news reported that there were trees down, flooded roads, and hazardous conditions. Alexa knew there was absolutely no way they could drive home today in her precious car and risk a leak from the windscreen blowing a wiper fuse and turning Farina into a rust bucket.
The modern, bright carriage was almost empty when they boarded the train at the historic red-bricked Castlemaine Station. As they settled in at the back of the quiet carriage, Eleanor chose to sit by the window, and Alexa sat down in the seat diagonally across, not wanting to encroach on Eleanor’s space this morning.
Alexa had left behind her frayed mood, not allowing herself to dwell too much on last night’s anti-climax. She’d had a restless night, kept awake by the total silence from the adjacent bedroom. Her guest obviously had no trouble falling asleep, while Alexa lay awake itemising the events of the day.
Mild flirtation had taken place. The chocolate incident—she’d almost kissed Eleanor, then. Romantic setting with candlelight, pattering rain and log fire. A nice meal and easy conversation. Eleanor freshly showered, in pyjamas hanging loosely on her slender hips. The kiss. Delicious, tumbling, at first tentative, their kiss had turned into a full-on, open mouthed, almost sexual caress. Culminating in rejection. In bed, alone, feeling sorry for herself.
Had she made a mistake? Had she moved too fast? Whatever that meant. If Eleanor was going to take off on assignment, surely, they shouldn’t waste time. Alexa licked her bottom lip, remembering the taste of Eleanor’s mouth, the stroke of her tongue—the way her mouth fit perfectly against hers—like pieces of a puzzle. She groaned.
Eleanor tapped her lightly on her foot.
Alexa looked up and covered her mouth with her hand. Eleanor must have heard her. “Yes?”
“It was good of Louise and Kelly to drive us to the train station. You’re lucky to have friends in Castlemaine.”
“I am.” Alexa smiled. “It’s not the first time they’ve come to my rescue.”
As soon as Alexa had explained the situation, they’d hopped into their dual-cab utility and, despite the hazardous weather, arrived at the cottage bearing fresh croissants, homemade strawberry jam, and milk.
Gradually, their barrage of questions and effusive compliments, all aimed at Eleanor, of course, had subsided, and the four of them got stuck into breakfast before the girls drove them to the station. In the back seat, Louise had surreptitiously nudged Alexa, glancing at Eleanor, raising her eyebrows in question. Alexa had adamantly shaken her head. She didn’t even want to think about what had happened last night, let alone tell Louise about it.
Eleanor tapped her on the foot again to get her attention.
The rolling motion of the diesel locomotive train had the effect of lulling Alexa into a reflective mood. “Sorry.”
“They were extremely curious. Tell me about Louise and Kelly.” Eleanor angled her body towards Alexa and gazed at her intently. “Have you known them long?”
“Louise and I went to school together,” Alexa began. “They’ve been a couple for over ten years.”
They chatted for a while, then fell into a comfortable silence until the train lurched out of Woodend Station halfway through their journey.
Alexa browsed through the latest copy of Archivist Magazine while trying not to listen to Eleanor’s phone conversation. When she’d taken the call from her mother a few minutes ago, Eleanor had plugged her ear with a wireless headphone, positioned herself as close as she could to the window, and lowered her head.
“I sent you a text last night, Mother,�
�� she said in a loud whisper. “So, you knew I wouldn’t be back for lunch. I gave you plenty of notice. Even sent you another text this morning.” She sighed heavily.
The carriage filled with new passengers from the last stop, forcing Alexa to give up the aisle seat and shuffle over to the window, opposite Eleanor. She carefully arranged her feet in between Eleanor’s parted legs, trying not to disturb her while she was having a heated conversation with her mother.
Alexa turned to a random page and stared. She wasn’t reading anything, but she couldn’t watch Eleanor’s distress. Hearing the one-sided conversation was bad enough. Even the muffled sound from the large over-ear headphones worn by the teenager sitting beside her wasn’t enough of a distraction.
“No. You misunderstood. I messaged you this morning that we couldn’t take an earlier train. Didn’t you get the storm in Melbourne? There are trees down in Castlemaine causing traffic chaos. We had to wait for Alexa’s friends to give us a ride to the station.”
After a moment of silence, Eleanor glanced Alexa’s way, held up her phone, and rolled her eyes. Sorry, she mouthed, and Alexa gave her a warm smile. “Well, please apologise to the Wrights for me. Anyway, Leo is there.” Eleanor glanced at her watch. “Yes. Are you sure Leo doesn’t mind? We’re running on time, I think. If it’s any consolation, I’ll be there for afternoon tea. Yes. Around 1.30 at Southern Cross. In the public car park near the bus terminal. Thank you. Bye.”
She yanked the earpiece out of her ear and tucked it with her phone into the outer compartment of her rucksack. “Fuck.” Eleanor leaned back against the seat and closed her eyes.
That one word summed up the tone of the conversation. Hopefully it didn’t encapsulate the entirety of Eleanor’s relationship with her mother. She couldn’t bear to think how painful it must be to have a fractious relationship with your mother.
Alexa removed her glasses, placing them on top of the magazine. She gazed at Eleanor for a few seconds. “Trouble?”
“No more than usual.” Eleanor sighed, opening her eyes.
“I couldn’t help but hear. It’s a bummer we didn’t get you back in time for lunch. I guess your mum was really keen to have you there.”
“You could say that. My mother doesn’t like to admit she’s wrong.”
Alexa placed her chin in her hand and considered the situation for a moment before saying, “I suppose it was confusing. Our plans did change.”
“That’s the whole point! I kept her informed. She’s so intent on controlling me.” Eleanor’s eyes narrowed. “Even when I try and do the right thing, it’s wrong.”
“She’s just disappointed.” Alexa tried to calm Eleanor’s indignation.
“Ha, you’ve got that part right. I’m a constant disappointment to her.” Eleanor scoffed. “As far as she’s concerned, my career is too unstructured. I take photos. That’s not good enough. She wanted me to follow in her footsteps and become a lawyer. She doesn’t understand what I’m doing with my life, and that’s an ongoing point of tension.”
“I’m so sorry you feel that way. It’s a shame you two don’t get along.” Alexa soothed. “I never experienced that with Mum. Of course, she was strict when she had to be, but I always felt it was out of love. Things were tough when my father took off, and Mum had to work really long hours to make ends meet.”
Eleanor leaned forward, reached for Alexa’s hand, and gave it a gentle squeeze. “God, I’m sorry, Alexa,” she said. “You lost your mum only two years ago.”
“It still seems like yesterday.” Alexa took Eleanor’s hand in both of hers, relishing the comfort. Eleanor didn’t appear to object; she didn’t pull away.
How could two years have passed already? The memory was still so raw she could feel the pain welling up inside of her. When Alexa had received the call about her mother’s death, everything had changed in the flash of a second. How could she explain to Eleanor the million things she would never experience in the same way again? She and her mother would never sit at the movies with a huge bag of popcorn between them; spend all day in the cottage garden and then rustle up a meal just for two with produce they’d freshly harvested; or play Scrabble with Gran, turning a blind eye to her made-up words, often letting her win.
Alexa let go of Eleanor’s hand and stared blankly out the train window. The three weeks before her mother died Alexa had been juggling her PhD studies and work commitments, choosing to spend what little free time she had in the arms of her former post grad professor. They’d re-connected at an art history conference in Melbourne, flirted over cocktails at the seminar dinner, and the rest was history. It was three weeks she hadn’t spent with her mother. Three weeks she’d always regret.
She turned away from the window to find Eleanor still focussed on her. “Mum always called us the three musketeers. Gran, her, and me,” Alexa whispered. “I have no right to say this, but please don’t take the moments with your mother for granted. When she’s gone, you’ll wish you’d tried harder to understand her.”
Alexa squeezed her eyes shut. She would not cry. Why on earth was she giving Eleanor advice? Half expecting to be told to mind her own business, Alexa glanced up shyly and was heartened by the look of understanding in Eleanor’s eyes.
“My mother and I don’t always see eye to eye, but I do love her,” Eleanor said softly. “Thanks, Alexa.”
The train slowed, and the loudspeaker announced they were approaching Southern Cross Station. “Please collect all belongings and disembark from the right side of the train. Watch your step.”
“Mind the gap,” Eleanor said.
Alexa smiled and tucked her glasses and magazine back into her satchel.
Eleanor’s phone beeped with an incoming text, and she checked the screen. “Leo’s here already.”
“I can grab a taxi, Eleanor, so I don’t delay you any longer,” Alexa said, not wanting Eleanor to be in any more trouble. In a lighter tone, she added, “You promised your mum you’d be at the Heysen home in time for afternoon tea.”
“It’s not Downton Abbey, you know.” Eleanor snickered. “There’s no fixed time.”
“Is that so, Lady Eleanor?” Alexa laughed. For all she knew, the Heysens did live in a mansion. Hawthorn was a ritzy suburb, after all.
“We’ll take you home,” Eleanor insisted.
“Are you sure about dropping me in Abbotsford? It’s out of your way.”
“Hardly.” Eleanor nudged Alexa with her shoulder. “Anyway, you’ll get to meet my favourite brother.”
“Your older brother?”
“Actually, Leo is my only sibling. And yes, he’s five years older than me.”
They stepped out of the cosy carriage and onto the chilly platform, joining the stream of Sunday commuters. Eleanor transferred the folded umbrella to her right hand and linked her left arm through Alexa’s as they made their way towards the exit. “I don’t want to poke you with the umbrella or lose you in the crowd,” Eleanor said in a raised voice, over the intercom announcements, the general hum of people, and the squeal of trains arriving and departing.
Alexa tugged Eleanor closer, blushing at the realisation that Eleanor had initiated the physical contact. At the Bus Terminal sign, they stepped onto the moving escalator and continued to walk as it rode upwards.
“Sorry to rush you. It’s only a drop-off, pick-up point, so Leo can’t park there long.”
“No problem.”
At the top, Eleanor slid her arm free and headed directly towards a nice-looking man with an affable smile who was leaning against a compact black hatchback. He was fashionably dressed in a fitting checked polo shirt, narrow dark trousers, and leather loafers. A bit preppy. His hair was a little darker than Eleanor’s, and like his sister, he was agreeably well-proportioned.
Alexa stood back as Eleanor went to her brother and he slipped an arm around her shoulder, hugging her tightly. Considering El
eanor’s troubled relationship with her mother, it was reassuring to see the siblings’ obvious affection for each other.
He shifted his attention to Alexa, let go of Eleanor, and held out his hand. “Hello, Alexa, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”
Eleanor turned. “Excuse my manners. Alexa, this is Leo.”
Alexa gave his hand a firm shake. “Nice to meet you, too. Thanks for picking us up. I’m sure you had better things to do on your Sunday afternoon.”
Leo shrugged, and when he looked directly at her, his blue eyes were kind. “Believe me, I was more than happy to escape Mum’s luncheon for an hour or so,” he said. “We’d better get moving, though, before I get a parking fine.”
Leo opened the front passenger door, leaned down, and tilted the seat forward. “Eleanor, squeeze in back here and watch your head. Alexa will be more comfortable up front with me.”
Before Alexa could protest, Eleanor stooped and clambered into the back seat with her rucksack and umbrella, then pulled the rear door closed.
Without further hesitation, Alexa climbed into the passenger seat. Leo gently closed the door and jogged to the driver’s side, sliding in. It would have been cosier to sit in the back with Eleanor, but that would have been rude.
Eleanor lightly bopped Leo’s headrest. “Drive on, chauffeur.”
He glanced at his sister in the rear vision mirror, winked, then backed out of the car space.
Alexa turned around to Eleanor and gave her a big smile, and Eleanor grinned back. It was clear she and her brother were close.
As an only child herself, Alexa’s mother had encouraged her to bring schoolfriends home and mix with the neighbourhood children. She’d never lacked for company, but watching Eleanor and Leo, she couldn’t help but feel a slight pang of envy. It would have been amazing to have a built-in support system. Especially after her mother died—when the pain was unbearable for her and Gran, and Alexa had longed for someone with a shared life story, experiences, and memories.
“Fasten your seat belts, ladies. We’re off,” Leo said. “Alexa, I guess you’d better give me directions.”