by Kally Ash
Chapter 30
Gigi watched Max’s cab drive away, its taillights disappearing around a corner too soon. The goodbye they’d just shared was bittersweet, but in a way she thought she preferred it to the one they would have had in two days’ time. This one was veiled with another kind of sadness, which seemed to eclipse the pain she felt because Max’s was that much more potent.
She couldn’t fathom losing one of her parents. It was one of her greatest fears, but something that every child had to experience along this long road called life. Turning, she stepped back into the apartment building. The place felt so empty, knowing Max and Erin wouldn’t be returning. Walking the quiet hallway, she shut Max’s bedroom door behind her and breathed in the silence. It settled heavily in her lungs, making her feel as if she were suffocating. She re-packed her suitcase and then climbed into Max’s side of the bed. The scent of him lingered there and Gigi clutched at his pillow.
She felt the first of her tears fall. She wondered how it hadn’t taken all that long for him to become so important to her. It made absolutely no sense at all, but she supposed it didn’t have to. He had become imprinted on her soul and she knew she would never forget him.
*
Sunlight streamed through the sheer curtains, waking Gigi. Her eyes felt puffy and sore, evidence that she’d cried herself to sleep after Max had left. Grabbing her phone from the nightstand, she looked at the time; he would be boarding his flight. She got out of bed and staggered to the bathroom for a quick shower. She had classes this morning that she couldn’t miss, considering she’d skipped the one the day before. Once she was satisfied with the state of the apartment, she dragged her suitcase out into the hall. But instead of going to the elevator, she went just a few doors up from Max’s place and knocked.
Jeremy looked surprised to find her standing on his doorstep. “Gigi, right?”
She nodded. He did remember her from the club, then. Holding out her hand, she dropped the set of keys Max had cut for her into his palm. “I’m sure you’ve heard by now.”
“Yeah, I did. Is he all right?”
She shrugged. “He’s okay—shocked mostly. Anyway, I thought I’d give you my keys to pass onto the realtor since I won’t be needing them anymore.”
Jeremy frowned. “Why won’t you need them?”
“He won’t be coming back.”
His frown deepened. “Am I missing something?”
“You don’t know?” she asked. Jeremy shook his head. “Max was returning to LA on Friday. His boss found a replacement for him.”
“Right.”
“I’m sorry if I’ve told you something I shouldn’t,” she said in a rush.
“It’s fine, Gigi. Don’t worry about it. I’ll make sure to get these keys back to the realtor.”
“Thanks. I guess I’ll see you around.”
He nodded and Gigi turned, riding the elevator down for the final time and stepping from the apartment building.
*
Classes dragged by that day. Gigi couldn’t recall a single thing that had been discussed—nor could she summon the interest to care. She was functioning on autopilot until lunch when Alex tracked her down at a local deli.
“Gigi, I’ve been trying to catch you all day,” he said, taking the empty seat beside her.
She didn’t even bother to look at him. Her attention was firmly fixed on the turkey on rye in front of her. “Sorry.”
“Hey,” he said softly, touching her shoulder. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong.”
“You know you can tell me anything, right?” he said, ignoring the way she’d just shrugged off his concern.
With a sigh, she looked at him. “There’s nothing to tell, Alex.”
“Is it the AMNH internship position?”
Yeah, that’ll do, she thought. “Sure.”
“They do second-round intakes, you know. Some of the people who applied turned down their offer.”
“When are those positions announced?”
He looked at the date on his watch. “In the next few days.”
“Great.” Her voice was hollow. Nothing seemed to matter anymore. Before Max, all she’d cared about was studying and getting a great job after university. Now her life seemed to lack color.
“How about this,” he started, “to cheer you up, we can do whatever you want after the last class today. We can catch a movie, or get an early dinner. We can try this dating thing again.”
She gave him a watery smile. “I appreciate it, Alex, I really do, but I’m just not in the mood. I’m just going to go home after last class.”
He studied her for a long time before he gave a short, sharp nod. He turned to face the window. “I get it, you know.”
“Get what?”
“You brushing me off as nicely as you can. You’re seeing someone else, aren’t you?” She said nothing. “And I’m pretty sure it’s your boss.”
Gigi stiffened.
“And it’s okay,” Alex continued. “I could definitely sense something between you two when I came over.”
She stared at him. “So why did you kiss me?”
He shrugged, smiling bashfully. “I had to try, didn’t I?” He laughed, stood up and kissed her on the head. “Take it easy, Borello,” he said, Jen’s nickname for her falling easily from his lips.
She finished her sandwich, and had every intention of going to her final class for the day, but she found her feet taking her in the direction of her apartment instead. Jen wasn’t home yet, giving her time to herself—time to grieve. She dumped her messenger bag on the floor in her room and went into the bathroom, running the bath while she searched for a bottle of wine in the fridge.
By the time the water was ready, Gigi had poured herself a glass of wine and had it set up on the side of the tub along with her phone. It was two o’clock now, and Max would be texting soon. She was desperate to talk to him, to find out how he was. Undressing, she stepped into the bath, hissing through her teeth as the hot water lapped at her bare skin. She submerged herself, resting her head back against the bath pillow and closing her eyes.
She couldn’t keep going on the way she was. Yes, she missed Max, but he’d barely been gone a day. The reality was what it had always been: he was always going to leave and she was going to continue studying and hopefully get a job at the Museum of Natural History. If she failed in that, then she’d try at another museum. New York wasn’t the be all and end all for her, but it was her first preference; she didn’t want to be too far away from her parents.
If someone had asked her last year whether or not she’d be moping over a guy, she would have laughed in their faces. But things had changed. Along the way, she had changed. Her thoughts were jarred when her phone started to ring. Picking it up, she answered the call.
“Max?”
“Yeah, it’s me,” he replied. Just the sound of his voice soothed her and she relaxed back in the tub. “There’s an echo. Where are you?”
“The bath.”
“Fuck, Gigi. Why’d you have to tell me that?” he growled, his voice sending shivers along her skin.
“How’s your mom doing?”
Her question seemed to sober him. “I called her again before I left New York. She was doing okay. I’ve just landed at LAX. I’m going to go straight to the hospital to see her now.”
“I miss you, Max,” she muttered.
“I miss you, too, Gigi.”
“Call me after you leave the hospital. It doesn’t matter what time it is.”
“I will. Talk soon.”
She hung up the phone and took a big drink from her wine glass. She wouldn’t let this speedbump in her life drag her down. It could very easily distract her from her goals in life, but she wouldn’t let it. She was better than that—stronger than that.
Chapter 31
The funeral was three days later in Seattle. Standing shoulder-to-shoulder with his brothers, Max nodded at one of his father’s colleagues as they sho
ok hands at the wake, accepting his condolences stoically. People had flown in from all over the country to pay their final respects to his dad and it said something about his father that Max hadn’t considered before: he was a well-respected and well- loved man.
Max, along with the triplets and two of his uncles, had been the pallbearers at the funeral. They loaded their dad into the back of the hearse, watching it drive off to the crematorium. It was his father’s wish that nobody attend that part of the funeral. His dad had wanted people to celebrate his life, not watch his coffin burn to ashes.
“I’m so sorry, Max,” one of his aunts said in a soft voice. “It was such a shock.”
“Thanks, Aunt Lucille.” He hugged her. “We’ll miss him.”
She nodded and moved along the line, talking to one of his brothers. Max excused himself when another friend approached him to tell them how sorry they were; he was so sick of hearing the words. They didn’t bring his father back, and they certainly did nothing to ease his pain.
But of course, that pain was two-fold. Leaving Gigi behind had broken something inside him. At the time, he hadn’t wanted to acknowledge they weren’t going to get another goodbye—that that was it. It was only when he was in the cab that it dawned on him just how much he had wanted her to come with him.
It was too late, though—he couldn’t have asked her to just drop everything and travel across the other side of the country to go to a funeral of all things. To ease some of the pain, he called her every day and he found that as soon as he was off the phone with her, he wanted to call her back to hear her voice once more. It was insane to think that someone could have had such an impact on his life in such a short time.
In the kitchen of his father’s house, he opened up the cupboard and found a glass. His mom had forgone the no-alcohol rule on account of the occasion, so malt whiskeys and bottles of bourbon were clustered together on the counter top. Max picked up a bottle indiscriminately and opened it. Pouring himself a healthy sized drink, he swallowed it all in one go, wincing as it burned.
“I think she wants her daddy,” his mom said from the entry to the kitchen, frowning when she saw the glass of liquor in his hand. In her arms was a fussing Erin. Max put the glass down, feeling like he was getting scolded, though she hadn’t said a word.
He took his daughter, feeling her little arms snake around his neck. It had been a long day and she was tired. “She just needs her nap,” he said, leaning down to kiss his mom on the forehead. “Thanks for looking after her.”
She nodded, her eyes misting. “It’s been nice to have a distraction.”
“Yeah,” he agreed. He knew exactly how she felt. “I’m going to see if she’ll go down for a while.”
Max carried Erin away from the wake, away from the buzz of voices. He opened up the door of the room he and Erin had been staying in and closed it behind him. Blissful silence enveloped them both. Closing up the drapes, he rocked Erin for a while, feeling her getting more and more relaxed in his arms. When he was sure she was out, he gently placed her in the travel cot, tucking in the blankets around her. With any luck she would get a good couple of hours rest. Retreating quietly, he stepped back into the hall and closed the door. He just stood there for a moment, savouring the privacy.
When he felt ready, he turned back to the living room but stopped when someone stepped into the hall ahead of him.
“What are you doing here?” he asked in a hiss.
Chelsea gave him a sympathetic smile that he knew to be fake. That woman didn’t know the meaning of empathy. She was dressed in black, as the occasion had called for, but the cut of her dress was too tight to be appropriate. Her blonde hair was loose and falling over her shoulders. “I came to pay my respects to my father-in-law.”
“Ex father-in-law,” he reminded her. To distract himself from the terrible reality that his father had died, Max had seen his lawyer before flying to Seattle and set the divorce wheels in motion.
She pouted. “Yes, I received the papers yesterday. I wanted to talk to you about them, actually.”
“How about you get your lawyer to talk to mine. I’m not discussing anything with you, especially at my father’s wake.” He would have shoved past her, but he was the only thing standing between her and Erin. She obviously picked up on his anxiety.
“Is she sleeping?” she asked.
“You know she is.”
“Can I see her before I go?” Chelsea looked penitent as she spoke.
He shook his head. “I’m not letting you near her again.”
Her expression turned to rage. “She’s still my daughter, Max. You can’t keep her from me.”
“Actually, I can. You walked out on us. According to my lawyer, that gives me every right to keep her from you. And I’m sure you’ve already read the details of the divorce, but I’m getting full custody of her.”
Her lips thinned. “I’ll fight you on this.”
He shrugged. “I’m sure you will. Now, get out of my father’s house before I call the cops.”
She laughed at him, throwing her head back. “What are you going to tell them? I came to say goodbye to my father-in-law?” she challenged.
He gave her a sardonic smile. “How about trespassing? If you try to touch Erin, I’ll add attempted abduction to the list of complaints.”
Max could see the moment when Chelsea accepted defeat. She turned away from him, rolled her shoulders back and sauntered back the way she’d come. He stayed in the hallway for a few more minutes before re-emerging.
“Was that who I thought it was?” Sam asked, handing him a glass of scotch.
Max drained the glass before answering. “Yep.”
“What did she want?”
“To talk about the divorce.”
“So you’re going through with it?”
“Yes. I’ve forgiven her too many times before.”
Sam raised his glass to him. “About fucking time,” he said, taking a drink. “Do you want to go outside for a bit?”
He nodded. “Let me get a refill first.”
“I’ll meet you out there.” Sam walked towards the front door while Max headed in the direction of the kitchen. Using the same glass as before, he filled it up then joined his best friend outside.
“So, you’re back for good then?” Sam asked, his eyes on the street in front of the house, on the cars lined up on both sides.
“I was supposed to start work on Friday night.”
“Evangeline give you some time off?”
“I have to be in on Monday.”
“Tough, brother.” Max couldn’t agree more. “What happened to that New York girl you were seeing? Gigi, was it?”
Pain lanced through his heart. “She’s still there.” He could feel Sam studying him, but he didn’t turn his face.
“Things got serious, didn’t they?”
Max took a sip from his glass, balancing it on the armrest of the wooden deck chair he was sitting in. “More serious than I ever thought they would.”
“Is she going to come to LA, or are you doing long-distance?”
“I don’t know,” he replied honestly. “We didn’t get around to discussing it,” he said with a shrug. “We were supposed to have two more days together, but because I had to come home so quickly, we didn’t talk about it. I just said goodbye to her outside my apartment as I was getting into a cab.”
Sam shook his head.
“What?” Max demanded.
“This is the first time I’ve ever seen you torn up about a girl.”
“So?”
Sam put down his glass and turned his body to properly look at him. “She obviously means a lot more to you than you’re letting on. Let me ask you this: do you want to have a relationship with her?”
“Yes.”
“Then have one.”
He made it sound so easy. “It’s complicated,” Max replied.
“Uncomplicate it, Max. If you want her, tell her. She can’t read your mind.”
Being spoken to so bluntly made him realize he hadn’t really ever tried to have a serious conversation with Gigi about what would happen when he left. All he had ever done was predict what would happen. He looked at his watch. It was three p.m., which made it six p.m. in New York. Leaving his glass where it was, Max reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. There was a text there he hadn’t seen; it was from Gigi.
Just letting you know I’m thinking about you today. I hope you get to say good bye to your father comforted by family and friends. Call me if you need to talk. I love you. xxx
He got up, took a few steps away from Sam, and dialed Gigi’s number.
“Hello?” she answered.
“Hey.”
“How are you? How was today?”
“It was nice—sad, but nice.”
“How was the wake?”
He turned around and looked through the front window, seeing all his family recounting different stories about his dad. The scene made him smile. “It’s still going.”
“Oh…We can talk later—”
“No. It’s fine. I wanted to speak to you about something.”
There was a squeak in the background, and he could picture her sitting down on the end of her bed. “Okay.”
He breathed in deeply and let it out. “I left pretty quickly, huh?”
“You had a good reason,” she replied cautiously.
“I didn’t want to leave you, Gigi. As that cab was driving away, all I was thinking about was how I wanted you sitting next to me on the backseat.”
“Max, you don’t have to say that.”
“I want to. I said I couldn’t live in the same city without touching you. The truth is, I can’t live in the same country without touching you.” He heard her sharp intake of breath on the other end of the line. “I know I have no right to ask you, but would you consider moving to California to be with me?”
The beat of silence that followed his question made him sweat. He knew he was asking a lot of her, but his life was on the west coast.