This spurred Ariel over the edge. She threw back her head, gulping in a breath, holding it for a moment, and letting it out in a raw growl of release. Feeling a gush of hot wetness from Ariel's core flow down the sides of her thigh, Kiernan riveted her eyes on Ariel's face which was suffused with the intensity of her orgasm. Never had Kiernan seen anything so profound as this. Ariel's features were a sculpture of both rapture and vulnerability. Kiernan held her, feeling the shuddering aftershocks before she stilled, drawing in rasping breaths.
Ariel opened her eyes and gazed down and Kiernan was shocked by the level of bewilderment and hurt she saw. What had Kiernan done to cause that expression? Remorse assailed her that she allowed this to happen--that she wanted this to happen. Replacing the remorse was tenderness drawn forth by the bruised look in Ariel's eyes. She desired to hold Ariel close against her and feel her heart beat against her breasts and in rhythm with her own heart. She wanted Ariel to know she desired a connection with her beyond the physical. She stroked her hands soothingly down Ariel's back, seeing the eyes shut.
Ariel collapsed to the side of Kiernan, rolling onto her back, and flung an arm over her eyes.
"Let me hold you," Kiernan gently said. She put a hand on Ariel's shoulder, feeling it tense. She leaned over to place a tender kiss on Ariel's cheek, only to have her twist sharply away and hurl herself off the bed. "Ariel?"
Her back to the bed, Ariel pulled on her robe with agitated motion.
"Ariel, come back," Kiernan said softly. "I would like to talk to you."
Ariel tied the robe and spun to face Kiernan, her eyes hot, mouth twisted. "I don't ever want to hear what you have to say. The marriage is consummated. We are now legally married, and the contract is now in effect. I know the contract grants you conjugal rights. But know this, Kiernan--I will never make love to you--only fuck you." She swiveled and hurried from the room.
"Ariel, no, come back. Ariel--" Kiernan slid off the bed to follow, but faltered and flung herself back onto her pillow. "Damn, damn, damn!"
Her eyes watered and her throat closed on a sob that led to a further realization. She knew now that she should never have taken her anger and jealousy out on Ariel. She behaved like a bitch-- worse than a bitch. Kiernan felt empty, sad, and very alone.
ARIEL ORDERED THE shower on full force. A pulsating stream of compact water, almost stinging, hit her skin. The temperature was on the hot side, as hot as she could tolerate. She wanted to wash away what she'd done, wash the scent of Kiernan's passion away--and her own. She soaped the washcloth and roughly scoured her skin. When she scrubbed between her legs, she jerked abruptly when the soapy washcloth rubbed her clitoris, still tender from her orgasm. She turned, and put out her arms stiffly, placing her palms on the back wall. Leaning, she felt the hot water thrum against her shoulders, back, and buttocks and sobbed aloud, "Why, why, why?" She knew the answer to why she did this, but couldn't explain the why of her response--why she lost control-- why she fell.
"I WILL NEVER make love to you--only fuck you." The words wouldn't leave, echoing over and over, as Kiernan lay in the dark agonizing over what had occurred.
The words pummeled her with guilt, regret, and shame, flaying her conscience into agonizing pieces. She left her bed, flung on a robe, and fled into the sitting room and over to the bar to pour a finger of whiskey into a snifter.
A wall lamp cast a muted golden glow, enough to see by, but didn't reach into the shadows. She shambled over to the fireplace and turned on the gas fire in an attempt to ward off the chill from her tumultuous emotions and sat in the old rocking chair that had been in her family for over two hundred years. Her mothers, Maureen and Nicole, rocked her in this chair when she was a baby. This chair also rocked Maureen, her grandmother Shanna, as well as generations of O'Shay babies before her. One day, she hoped to see Ariel in this chair rocking their daughter. Perhaps sitting in it would lend her solace. Rocking slowly back and forth, she stared forlornly into the fire, seeing nothing, yet seeing everything.
All of this was her fault. What in the hell did she think she was doing ordering Ariel to inform her who she saw and where she went? Ariel wasn't some wayward teenager who needed her permission. Then to make matters worse--Kiernan threatened to press charges against her mother. She had treated Ariel as some shady business negotiator trying to pull a fast one. But, wasn't this marriage business? She'd never been jealous over any business deal, or over any woman. She'd been attracted to Ariel ever since she first met her, but now this was more than attraction, much more. She couldn't consider this strictly a business deal at all, though Ariel must. Ariel hated her for sure and would probably always consider this relationship only business. Kiernan wasn't sure what to do. She would tell her she was sorry, and hope she'd forgive her.
"I will never make love to you--"
"I know the contract grants you conjugal rights--"
"Oh my God!" Kiernan said aloud.
Bolting from the chair, she hurried across the room to open the wall safe and withdrew the prenuptial agreement. She clicked on the desk lamp and flipped through the pages until she came to the spot she wanted and felt her blood go cold with rage. "I'm going to kill him."
THE SOUND OF soft sobbing woke her. Ariel opened her eyes, realizing they were full of tears, and her nose full of mucus, making her sniff forcefully. In her mind flashed an image of Mysha, her eyes dark obsidian, condemning and accusing. She had been dreaming of Mysha. Sorrow filled her, and she rolled onto her back, staring into the morning gloom. With sudden clarity, another image seared her thoughts: Kiernan, beneath her as she--"Oh, God."
The taste of bile flooded her mouth and an onslaught of dark emotions assailed her: anger, regret, and shame. But shame was uppermost. Shame that she'd allowed anger and lust to control her actions-- and her reactions. She had succumbed to her attraction for Kiernan. Flinging the covers aside, she exited her bed, trying to leave behind the harpies who tormented her.
Gazing out her window, she saw the chill blue sky and the neighboring mountains still shrouded in clouds where the morning sun had not yet reached. A glance at the clock on her bedside table showed it was 9:30. Kiernan would be at Stellardyne, which was a relief, as Ariel was in no way ready to face her this morning.
The night before, she had disarmed Kiernan of her main weapon and now she couldn't threaten her family. But Kiernan still had other weapons to use against her--especially one she couldn't ignore. Kiernan could demand she have sex with her, and she had no choice but to comply. Her thoughts briefly touched on the pleasure she'd experienced, thinking that wouldn't be such a terrible thing. Shame once again pinned her, and she twisted on the needle point that often accompanied shame--guilt. How could she be such a traitor! She had to remember what Kiernan had done to her mother.
After all that had happened the night before, maybe Kiernan wouldn't want her now, didn't want to see the hate in her eyes and feel it in her touch. Ariel could only hope--for her own sake.
Chapter Twenty
"MS. O'SHAY. MR. O'Shay is here to see you," Kelly said over the desk-com.
"Send him in." Kiernan rose from her desk chair and crossed her arms over her chest.
Theodore opened the door and was a couple of strides in before he saw her expression. He stopped abruptly, consternation crossing his face.
Before he could open his mouth, Kiernan said, "You have some explaining to do."
"Kiernan, I don't understand--what's this about?" He approached the desk and stood across from her.
Gritting her teeth, she reached for the contract on her desk and tossed it to him. "Stipulation nineteen. I thought I told you to remove it."
"I thought I did." He searched over the contract. "Somehow, I inadvertently gave you and Ariel the first draft to sign. I have the corrected one and will get it to you--."
"Uncle, I think you need to retire. In fact, I'm going to insist on it."
"Kiernan--please. I'll drop by tonight and have you and Ariel sign the right document.
I'll bring Franklin with me to notarize it. You will only need a couple of witnesses--Mrs. Belfort, and one of your staff. "
"I'll expect you at seven tonight."
"Frankly, I don't see what the problem is."
This comment caused her to have the sensation that the top of her head would explode from rage. "No. Being male, you wouldn't. It's degrading, that's what it is."
"Degrading? Sex is sex. You're sounding like a prude. Why, it wasn't too long ago you--"
She put her hands up, palms out, to halt his words. "I don't want to talk to you. Go!"
"I'll never understand the female mind."
"GO!" Kiernan pointed at the door.
"Very well." Theodore ambled off, and Kiernan heard him mumble something about women, proof, and a different species.
As soon as he exited, Kiernan fell heavily into her seat. She let out a frustrated sigh. How could she ever make amends to Ariel? She had acted like a jealous fool, pushing Ariel into-- She closed her eyes, trying to force images from her thoughts that made her feel shame, and arousal, which only compounded her shame.
The images were only replaced by the memory imprinted on her body of the feel of Ariel, and her touch. Never had anyone taken her so thoroughly. She was the one who always led the way in having sex--who took control. Never had she allowed a woman to dominate her in bed. Again and again, Ariel had brought her to orgasm. This was something she'd never experienced with any of her lovers. Once had always been enough. She couldn't help but wonder whether Ariel liked taking control if she wasn't angry or desperate. She couldn't help but wish she could find out.
Remembering bites on her nipples by neat white teeth, while that hot tongue flicked the swollen tips, caused them to harden. She moved her hand to her breast and felt the erect point push against the silk of her blouse. Grasping the hard tip between her thumb and forefinger, she pinched, imagining it was Ariel doing this. Raw lightning struck her hard in her core, and she moved her hands to the waist of her trousers, fumbling with the belt buckle. Suddenly, she froze, and removed her hands.
Enough! That wasn't going to happen with Ariel hating her. And what if someone walked in to her office?
She put her head in her hands.
Could she ever make things right? Where to begin? She'd apologize and work from there.
KIERNAN COULDN'T CONCENTRATE and left the office at three that day, wanting to go home and talk with Ariel. A heaviness of spirit and dread lay on her, dread of what she would see in Ariel's eyes.
As she climbed the steps to her suite, Mrs. Belfort called from the foot of the stairs, "Ma'am, you're home early. Is everything all right?"
"Everything's fine." She didn't owe her staff an explanation, and they knew not to expect one. "Is Ariel about?"
"Yes, ma'am. She's in the recreation room playing pool."
Kiernan went back down the stairs to the recreation room. She heard the clatter of pool balls before opening the door. Ariel peered up when the door opened and seeing Kiernan, her features tightened and posture straightened.
"I need to talk to you," Kiernan said in a soft voice.
"Yes?" Ariel asked cautiously.
"Can we go over to the sofa so I can sit?"
Ariel tossed the pool stick on the table and strode across the room to take a seat on one end of the couch, while Kiernan sat on the other end. They stared at one another, and Kiernan saw the wariness in Ariel's expression. She took a deep breath and let her words out evenly. "I want to apologize to you for treating you as a child yesterday. My behavior was unacceptable. Most of all, I want to apologize for my threats. I had no intention of annulling our marriage."
Ariel's eyes were steely, cutting right through Kiernan. "You want to apologize, do you? Why? Are you going to demand I have makeup sex with you?"
Ariel's words hit Kiernan hard, and she flinched. "No, Ariel, I would never demand sex from you--not even if it were one of the stipulations in our agreement."
Seeing Ariel's eyes widen with confusion, Kiernan said, "I have something else to tell you, something that--well--there has been a misunderstanding about a provision in the prenuptial contract. Stipulation nineteen, the conjugal stipulation, I never authorized it."
Confusion remained in Ariel's expression. "What do you mean?"
"Uncle Theodore--he was going by some sort of standard for these types of contracts and included it. When I saw it, I asked him to remove it, which he did, but somehow he managed to send us copies of the original contract and we signed the original one. He's coming by tonight with the corrected one for us to sign."
"I'll sign the contract, provided I can have time to review it."
"That won't be a problem. If you like, we can postpone the signing, and you can have Joyce--I mean your lawyer--go over it with you."
"That won't be necessary. Could you arrange for it to be signed in a few days?"
"I can do that." Kiernan hesitated, a tightness in her chest with what she wanted to say next. Meeting Ariel's eyes with her own, her words stumbled out. "Ariel--about what happened last night--"
"I don't want to discuss last night," Ariel said frostily, but her eyes were blazing. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have something I need to do."
As Ariel stood to leave, Kiernan said, "I need to talk to you--about us. About--"
"There is no us, Kiernan! There's only you!" Ariel's face reddened. "No one else matters but you and what you want!" She pivoted and strode swiftly from the room.
Kiernan closed her eyes and leaned her head against the sofa, wondering where they could possibly go from here.
Chapter Twenty-One
FOR THE EIGHTH night in a row, Kiernan ate dinner alone. She would leave for work in the morning, come home, eat, work in her study, go to her suite to attempt to sleep, and never once see Ariel. Other than the few minutes when Theodore brought the corrected contract for them to sign, Ariel had been a ghost. Oh, Kiernan knew what she did during the day because Mrs. Belfort kept her informed. Ariel went to a Harley Owner's meeting. She visited her mother, or rode over to Cherokee National Forest with her Harley Group. She stayed in her room, or played pool in the recreation room, or went for a walk after lunch.
Kiernan knew things would need to change. They would need to come to an understanding, or this could be hell for the next five years. They needed to think about their future child. If they couldn't get along, their child might develop psychological problems.
This marriage, it had happened so fast. They didn't know each other. She should have waited and dated her, according Ariel the opportunity to get to know her better. Maybe that was what was needed. Tomorrow was Saturday, and she would see Ariel in the morning to present her case.
ARIEL WAS FINISHING downloading applications to a select few of the universities that offered courses in aerospace engineering. Embry-Riddle, Kiernan's alma mater, was one of those, as was her alma mater, MIT. Georgia Tech in Atlanta had a top-rated program. Atlanta was closer to Crestview Estate and would make it easier to go back and forth when required to attend campus. She heard a knock. "Come in."
Kiernan entered cautiously. "I hope I'm not disturbing you."
Ariel thought about making a snide remark, but kept her voice and features neutral. "You want to see me about something?"
"Yes. Can we sit on your sofa?" The nervousness was evident in Kiernan's voice and the slight wringing of her hands.
Ariel couldn't believe this was the fearless and intimidating business tycoon. Ariel tipped her head in agreement and took a seat at one end of the sofa, with Kiernan taking a seat in the middle to face her.
Ariel waited expectantly. Kiernan's features were somber, and her voice strained. "Ariel, I know things are not good between us. I would like to make things better. Not only for me, but for you, our future--and for our child."
Ariel knew Kiernan had a point. They couldn't continue to reside in the same house with things as they were. She would probably be pregnant in a few months. They had to come to some underst
anding, some resolution. She swallowed and asked evenly, "And, we will make things better--how?"
"What I'm asking is for you to give us a chance. I think--I know we could--" Kiernan ran her fingers through her hair and looked Ariel full in the eyes. "Ariel, will you go out on a date with me?"
Ariel stared at her, baffled for a moment, and not sure she heard right. "What?"
Kiernan repeated, "Will you go out on a date with me?"
"You mean, as in a date, date?"
"Yes, as in going out together," Kiernan said almost shyly.
Ariel drew back against the arm of the sofa and studied Kiernan closely, wondering whether this was a joke. "I'm not sure what you mean."
"We never really got to know each other, and that's my fault. I was thinking we should date."
Suspicion immediately entered Ariel's mind as to Kiernan's motives. She asked warily, "What does this dating include?"
"Going out together, finding out what each of us likes and dislikes--that sort of thing."
"Let me get this straight. When you say 'date,' you mean something along the lines of a friendship."
"Yes, and getting to know each other better. I still don't know what your favorite movies are besides Star Wars, and I don't think I ever told you what my favorites are. Who are your favorite authors, your favorite music, and musicians? We could learn more about each other--like you do when you're dating."
Ariel was still confused. "But we're married."
"Yes, but where is there a rule that says we can't date? We never had that. I know it won't be the same as if we're single, but we can get to know each other the same way."
Ariel rubbed her forehead, her mind going over what Kiernan said. Was this a good idea? Then again, she didn't have another idea. Kiernan would have to make concessions. Ones Ariel wasn't sure she would make. Sounding harsh, she said, "And who would call the shots, Kiernan. You? Like you've always done? 'Oh, Ariel, I grant you permission to pick out the restaurant we're going to tonight. I'll even grant you permission to wear what you want.' Is that the way it's going to be?"
The Dreamer, Her Angel and the Stars Page 19