Reason emerged, sleep retreated, and the puzzle pieces of dreams scattered, leaving only reality. Her eyes shot open in startled realization. No, no, no! The cold morning light slapped her hard in the face, and she tensed her muscles, ready for flight.
She tried to sit up, but Kiernan tightened her grip and held tight.
"Let me up." The pressing warmth receded, and she tried to rise, only to have two strong hands press her shoulders hard against the mattress.
"Ariel, don't go. Stay. Please."
The soft beseeching voice lulled her for a moment. She lifted her eyes to the face looking down at her, seeing a melting tenderness she could easily mistake for a stronger feeling she wasn't willing to name. Was this the truth or only the remnants of the night?
"I only want to talk to you. Please?"
Ariel stilled but did not relax. She licked her lips, dry from sleep and nervousness. Her voice was husky from apprehension. "I--what about?"
"I--I--last night, I want--" She stopped for a moment and bit her lip. "Will you have breakfast with me?" Kiernan asked in a shy voice. A soft smile appeared and squeezed around Ariel's heart for a moment, invoking memories of soft caresses and gentleness in the night. "I'll have Ricardo make whatever you want. We'll take it in my sitting room. Or yours if you prefer."
Ariel needed time alone though. She needed to analyze and process what had occurred. She needed to sort through the tumultuous emotions and examine them--break them down to simple equations she could understand. Any other contact with Kiernan, at least for the day, would distract her. No. She couldn't deal with Kiernan until she dealt with her chaotic emotions and with the way Kiernan reversed the polarities of her feelings. If only it were as simple as a physics problem. She said gently, "I need to be alone--for a little while."
She rolled hurriedly from Kiernan's hands and off the bed, not bothering to pick up her clothes, and retreated to her own suite.
Kiernan watched as Ariel took her heart and fled, leaving a hollow place not even her tears were able to fill.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
THE BLACK ARTERIES that led to all four quadrants took Ariel on that Zen toward the perfect Nirvana. She journeyed into that mysterious realm of woman in metamorphosis. One with the metal beast she rode, she was no longer flesh and blood, but also steel and rubber. She's the modern embodiment of the ancient centaur: part woman, part machine.
Lean, lean, throttle, up shift, down shift, lean, throttle, up shift--the motions were as natural to her as breathing. Her engine heart was as real to her as the living muscle in her chest. Its roar was now her voice and sang oracles from the road gods that only she can decipher.
The wheels spun in an eternity of three hundred and sixty degrees, moved through time and space and dissolved the past, present, and future, as they took her to her destination. She arrived at that perfect nirvana. She was no longer Ariel, but all things and all knowing. She was nihility.
The cold seeped underneath her helmet and sifted in through the micro-fiber of her gloves pulling her back into time. Feet and hands numb and stinging, she pulled her bike into an overlook and along the side of a railing that hugged the edge of a drop. She dismounted, removed her helmet, and placed it on the seat.
She took in the vista of the mountains in mid November. The brilliance of autumn's splendor was fast fading, leaving the mountainsides a patched worn coat of gold, rust, and muted reds with only the occasional smear of evergreen. The sky was a crystal blue eternity with no clouds to mar it.
She opened one of her black saddlebags, pulled out a Thermos of coffee, and walked over to a nearby picnic table. After brushing the dry leaves from the seat, she sat. The coffee she poured into the deep lid roiled with steam. She brought the lid to her mouth, feeling the steam condense warmly on her cold nose. She sipped slowly, feeling the warmth go down her throat and thaw the chill.
Once again she turned her eyes to the autumn vista, but her brain had disconnected from that sense and what she saw didn't register. Instead, her memory came into focus, sharp and clear. Kiernan.
Her synapses zipped at light-speed to images in the moonlight, in Kiernan's bed, in her arms, the sound of her voice.
"Tell me what you like."
"Is this touch too much?"
"Yes, like that."
"Touch me."
"My angel."
"Come for me."
Could it be Kiernan was considering her as more than a means to something else? Could it be possible that Kiernan had feelings for her beyond friendship? Or was last night a trick of the moonlight? The moon had waxed full and would soon wane. Would this Kiernan wane with it?
She wanted to believe that this Kiernan--the one she was falling in love with--was the real Kiernan. But she wasn't ready to trust her. Kiernan had the power to hurt her. Falling in love? No. She must put it aside--hide it away with her desire and hunger from the light so it wouldn't grow--for how long, she didn't know.
THE SKY WAS one of the deepest blues Kiernan had ever seen. There wasn't a cloud or vapor trail to distract the eye. She gazed toward the nearby mountains, wondering whether Ariel was up there on one and looking toward the mountain Kiernan was on. She scampered up on a flat gray boulder and sat, feeling the cold seep through her dark brown corduroy trousers. This was the highest place on her mountain. From this spot she could see the Ocoee River below and the mountains of east Tennessee and North Carolina. She brought her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. A nip in the air heralded the arrival of winter. She lifted up the collar of her heavy green wool shirt and a slight stirring of air, not even a breeze really, touched her face.
She closed her eyes, remembering the moonlight, and Ariel. Images of Ariel beneath her, over her, and beside her. Ariel in command, wringing orgasm after orgasm from her until she thought she would die from pleasure. Ariel surrendering, hearing her soft moans and almost breathless cries. She could still taste her, feel her softness and the muscles flex beneath her hands.
For the first time in her life, Kiernan was in love. For the first time in her life, she made love. Before, with others, it was all about sex and physical gratification, emotions played no part in it.
For Ariel she sensed it was all about making love and not sex. For her sex was tied in with emotions of love and caring. Was that why she ran away this morning? She acted on the physical and not the emotional, perhaps feeling guilt, shame, and confusion.
Kiernan knew Ariel liked her and desired her. In time, she might even come to love her. Ariel needed to come to terms with what happened in her own way.
With Ariel probably feeling confused and vulnerable, now wasn't the time for Kiernan to tell her she loved her. Ariel would think she was lying to get her way. But she could show Ariel she loved her. She could be patient, supportive of her goals, listen when she needed it, and be a friend. Kiernan also felt a niggling of fear. Fear that the progress they were making, the friendship they were forging, might be hurt by what occurred the night before. All she could do was wait--and hope.
ALMOST AN HOUR later, Kiernan walked down the road from the mountaintop and turned the curve. She paused, startled for a brief moment. Ariel sat on the low stone fence of the orchard eating an apple. Ariel took an apple out of her jacket pocket and held it up. This gesture gave Kiernan hope things would be all right. She picked up her pace, almost running, and stopped breathlessly in front of Ariel "For me?"
Ariel handed her the apple. "For you. Have a seat."
Kiernan clambered on top of the stone fence next to her and bit into the apple. Its crunch was loud, and she tore off a chunk with her teeth causing a fine mist of apple juice to spray. Around the mouthful Kiernan said, "Good."
Ariel took a bite of her apple.
"How did you know I was up here?"
"I asked Mrs. Belfort. She said you headed up the road a little over an hour ago."
"I never told her where I was going."
"I have a feeling all of your staff knows where
you are at all times--and where I am as well."
"Yes, I suppose you're right. Did you go up to the falls to search for me?"
"No. I wasn't sure where you were, so I figured if I sat right here you would eventually pass by."
They ate their apples in silence, glancing occasionally at each other and smiling shyly.
Kiernan watched as Ariel's expression became serious. "Kiernan, about last night. I have to be honest. I wasn't ready for that. I'm sorry."
"There's nothing to be sorry for. I understand, more than you know. Let's chalk it up to the tango and the full moon."
Ariel smiled shyly at first, but in a blink, her expression became dazzling. "Would you like to watch a Star Wars movie with me tomorrow night?"
Kiernan couldn't keep the silly grin off her face, feeling things between them would indeed be fine. "Sure. What time?"
"How about my place at eight? I'll provide the movie, and you arrange for the popcorn and sodas."
"That I can do."
Ariel threw her apple core across the road, stood up, and brushed her hands on her jeans. "I guess we should head on back. It'll get dark soon." She held out her hand and Kiernan took it. Ariel pulled her up, but didn't let go of her hand as they walked back down the road toward home.
Chapter Thirty
1:30 P.M. DISPLAYED on the LED clock on Kiernan's desk. She glanced at it frequently, not only because she was anticipating her date with Ariel, but also because the clock was the bottom portion of a Plexiglas frame that held a picture of Ariel in her red dress. Helen had taken it at the fundraiser and e-mailed it to her the night before. Kiernan had printed it to photo paper and brought it into work this morning, replacing the picture of Celeste with it.
Reluctantly, she went back to the various reports for the day, slogging through them until she came to the report from Dwayne Campbell about the recent completion of updates and engine overhaul for Celeste. She buzzed through that one with keen interest, delighted to learn that the ship was now ready for whenever Kiernan wanted to use her.
She remembered when Ariel first boarded her, the excitement in her eyes, and the smile she couldn't keep off her face. Those memories brought a wistful expression, followed by a brief laugh. "Why the hell not?"
KIERNAN KICKED THE door to Ariel's suite while trying to keep steady the tray full of soda cans and a big bowl of popcorn.
"Come in."
"Ariel, open the door please."
A few seconds later Ariel opened the door, and Kiernan handed her the tray.
Ariel sniffed loudly. "Yummy, hot butter on the popcorn. I'm impressed."
"You should be. I popped it myself."
"What else can you cook?" Ariel placed the tray on the coffee table and took her seat on the sofa.
"A lot of things I'll have you know."
"Oh? Name me three things you can cook--besides popping popcorn."
"Fried eggs, scrambled eggs, and boiled eggs."
"I bet you bust the yokes on the fried eggs."
"Do not. Before you start the movie, I have to make a trip to your bathroom. I'll be right back. Don't eat all the popcorn."
"I can't guarantee that. Better hurry."
On the way out of the bathroom, Kiernan saw Ariel's motorcycle helmet on the dresser and picked it up. She put it on, closed the tinted shield, and walked back into the sitting room. She stopped in front of Ariel, and gave her best Darth Vader harsh breath sounds.
Ariel laughed. "What do you think you're doing?"
"Luke, Luke, I'm your daddy, Luke." Kiernan's voice was low and muffled by the helmet.
Ariel snorted in amusement. "I'm your father."
Kiernan lifted the helmet's face shield. "Funny, I never knew I had a father. And you certainly don't favor either of my mothers."
Ariel threw a piece of popcorn at her. Kiernan took off the helmet, set it on the end table, and plopped down on the sofa. She reached into the bowl of popcorn between them and took a handful. Ariel ordered the EM to play the movie and they settled back to watch.
A quarter of the way through the movie there was a knock at the door, and Ariel called loudly, "Come in."
Mrs. Belfort entered carrying six gold and six silver metallic balloons attached to a doll. Her expression was one of fleeting surprise when seeing Kiernan, which she soon replaced with satisfaction. "I have a special delivery for Ariel."
Ariel wore a puzzled expression as she went to retrieve the delivery.
"EM, pause movie," Kiernan said, watching Ariel with a glow in her eyes.
Mrs. Belfort exited after handing Ariel a stuffed gold C-3PO doll with the balloons attached by foot long strings to his waist. Ariel examined the doll, searching for a card. Kiernan leaned back against the sofa cushions, trying to appear casual.
Ariel squinted at her suspiciously. "What's this?"
Kiernan shrugged innocently. "Why don't you ask C-3PO? If you press the little red dot on his right hand, he'll tell you why he's here."
Ariel did so, and a recording of C-3PO's voice said, "Greetings, Ariel. I am C-3PO, and I am acting in my function as an official Protocol Droid, and as an Ambassador for Kiernan O'Shay. Be it known, your presence is required aboard Celeste, on December Second, to embark on a journey to the red planet, Mars. Kiernan guarantees you will have a good time."
Ariel's mouth dropped open in surprise. She gazed in wonder at Kiernan, who said, "Cat got your tongue?"
Ariel plunked down on the sofa, and delivered a squeezing hug. "This is--wow!" They disengaged, and Ariel said, "That's only two weeks away."
"I guarantee Celeste will be fully crewed and ready to go."
"Er--what about Christmas and my family coming over? Won't we miss it? Not that I would miss a trip to Mars for the world."
"We should be back a few days before Christmas." She said in her best command voice, "Ready to report for duty, crewman?"
Ariel straightened up, with chest out and shoulders back, and saluted. "Reporting for duty, Captain O'Shay, ma'am."
Kiernan made an effort to keep her eyes on Ariel's face and not on her prominently displayed chest. She gave a rakish grin. "At ease, crewman, before you slip a disc."
Ariel dropped her salute. "Permission to speak freely?"
"Granted."
Ariel leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. "Thank you."
"You're welcome."
Ariel moved the popcorn bowl to the coffee table, scooted over beside Kiernan, and put an arm around her shoulders. "Now, back to the movie. EM on."
Kiernan settled contently against Ariel's side.
Chapter Thirty-One
"I SWEAR IT, it goes in one ear at the speed of sound and comes out the other ear at light speed," Joanna said to the twins who sat on the sofa by Ariel and Kiernan. Joanna sat across from them in a chair. "I'm sorry, Kiernan. I told these two not to pester you about going with you and Ariel on the Mars trip."
Kiernan leaned forward slightly to say to the twins, "I'll tell you what. How about I arrange for you two and your mom to take a tour of Celeste and stay aboard a couple of days when you have your spring break?"
Leigh said, "Can we, Mom, please, please?"
"Please, Mom," Seth begged.
"That depends on how well you two behave," Joanna said, looking from one to the other. "So far, it doesn't look good."
"We'll behave. Won't we, Seth?" Leigh promised.
"Yeah. We'll behave."
Joanna rolled her eyes. "For around five minutes." She said to Kiernan, "Thank you. That's a few months away, and I'm not sure what I'll be doing at that time. But you have my permission for these two to go. I warn you though, they're a handful."
Kiernan glanced at Ariel, a sly smile on her face. "Ariel can keep them in line, I'm sure."
"Just show me where the airlock is located," Ariel said as she made faces at her brother and sister.
"Mega supreme!" Seth said. "Wait 'til I tell Larry and the gang."
"Thanks, Mom." Leigh said.
&
nbsp; "Don't thank me--thank Kiernan."
Leigh grinned. "Thank you, Kiernan."
"Yeah, thanks," Seth said.
"You're welcome."
Kiernan and Ariel had arrived at the Thorsen residence some fifteen minutes earlier for Thanksgiving. She was nervous on the ride over, not knowing what kind of reception she would get, but the warm welcome she received from Joanna and the twins put her at ease. So far, they'd managed to avoid any uncomfortable topics, and Joanna had not brought up the new computer processing job she started a week ago at a credit union.
A few minutes after arriving, Kiernan had surveyed the living room with interest to see whether there was any new furniture or anything else to indicate Joanna had spent any of the money Kiernan paid out as part of the prenuptial agreement. Granted, she had been in the house only one time and hadn't taken a tour, but it appeared the furniture was the same older pieces showing wear from daily use. She also noticed the older model Saturn in the driveway when they drove up to the house.
She was puzzled by Joanna's returning to work when she didn't have to and by the lack of material goods. Joanna could well afford to move into one of the upscale gated communities. The more Kiernan thought about it, the more she felt suspicious that something didn't ring true with the notion that greed had been the motivating factor in Joanna's theft of the new engine specifications. She decided that she would have the matter more thoroughly investigated when they returned from the Mars trip.
A buzzer sounded from the kitchen and Joanna said, "I need to check on the turkey and a few other things."
"Are you sure I can't help?" Ariel asked.
"I have it covered. Why don't you show Kiernan your picture album? I'm sure she wants to see your baby pictures."
The Dreamer, Her Angel and the Stars Page 26