Pull You Through

by Kaylee Ryan

  “Austyn?” His voice is pained.

  “I’m here,” I manage to croak out. “Why so soon? I mean, I thought we had more time?”

  “That’s just how these things work, angel. There’s no rhyme or reason to it. They say when and where I go.”

  “I know that, I just thought…. When do you leave?”

  “July. That’s all we know. We won’t have the exact date until right before we deploy. A week or so notice maybe?”

  I’m quiet, biting hard on my bottom lip to keep the sob that so readily wants to break free from my chest. I’m so not ready for this.

  “Say something.”

  A lone tear falls, trailing down my cheek. Sucking in a deep breath, I put on my game face. I need to be strong for him, for us. He needs to know I’m good, that we’re solid while he’s gone. He needs to focus on staying safe and coming back to me. “We knew this was part of it, right? We’ll get through it.”

  “When I signed up for this, I had nothing and now, with you, I have everything. This is my job, but you are my fucking heart and soul.”

  “I’ll be here when you come home to me.”

  He exhales heavily. “I love you.”

  “I love you, too.”

  “What was your news?” he asks.

  I swallow hard. “Well, I was going to tell you that I was coming to you. That I’m going to transfer schools so we can be together, but with this news, maybe I should stay here another year? I don’t know what to do.”

  “As much as I want you here, I think the idea of you being close to your family is a good one. Savannah, she might do the same. I don’t know. They have to apply for married housing, so maybe they’ll do that and put the target date of when they need housing as the date we’re supposed to come home.”

  “When is that? I mean how long are you going to be gone?”

  “Six months.”

  “If I move now, I’ll get all that time with you before you leave. School is out in late May. That would give us an entire month, maybe longer, depending on when you deploy.”

  “I want that, Austyn. I do, but I like the idea of your family being close to you while I’m gone. We’ll figure something out. I don’t get leave, but we’ll figure something out.”

  His words wash over me. We’ll figure something out. We have to. “So,” I change the subject, “how was your day?” There’s no sense in letting the news keep us from being real. The news is real. He’s being deployed. We can’t stop it, and he wouldn’t want to. He loves being a marine, and it’s my job to support him.

  He chuckles. “Other than the deployment news, it’s been good.”

  “This is what you’re trained to do, Slade. You’re going to be great, and when you get home, I’ll be there. I’ll be packed and ready to go. We’ll start the next phase of us when you get home.”

  “I like the sound of that.”

  “Good. It’s done.”

  “I need to get back. I just stepped out so I could give you the news. I don’t know if Combs has called Savannah.”

  Just then I get a text. I pull my phone away from my ear, and I see a text.

  Savannah: Have you talked to Slade?

  “She just texted me,” I tell him.

  “Call her. You two will need each other when we go. She’s going to be married weeks before he has to deploy.”

  “I’m going to try and talk her into staying here. I hate the thought of her being there all alone.”

  “I’ll call you later,” he says.

  “I’ll be waiting. Love you, knight.”

  “Love you, too, angel.”

  As soon as we hang up, I dial Savannah. “Hey,” she says. I can tell she’s been crying. “You talked to Slade?”

  “Yeah, he just called.”

  A sob comes through the line, and it takes all I have not to join her. “Are you okay to drive? I assume you left class?”

  “Yeah. He called right before I went in. I knew I’d never be able to focus.”

  “You okay to drive? You need me to come and get you?”

  “No, I’m good.”

  “Come here. I’ll make us some buffalo chicken dip, and we can veg out in front of the TV.”

  “I’m on my way.”

  Jumping into action, I head to the kitchen and start the dip. By the time she arrives, I have it in the oven. I cheated using canned chicken. “Hey,” I greet her, giving her a big hug.

  “I don’t know how to handle this, Austyn. How are you so calm?”

  “We have to be, Savannah. This is who they are. This is their job. We knew that going into this. We have to be strong and support them. That’s our role right now.” Even as I say the words, and know they’re true, I’m freaking out on the inside. This is a day that I’ve dreaded. I don’t want him to go. I want him here where I know he’s safe.

  “God, I don’t want him to go.”

  “I know the feeling, but the reality is they are. We’ll get through this, together.”

  “What would I do without you?”

  “You’ll never have to find out.” I take a seat next to her at the kitchen table. “Listen, I want to run something past you. It’s something for you to think about. I know you said that you and B have to apply for married housing. Why not apply for an opening date of when they come back and stay here while they’re gone. Don’t transfer yet.”

  “Why?”

  “So you’re not there alone,” I say gently.

  “I’ll have you.”

  “I’m gonna wait until they come home to move. I can change my major here, and I’ve already talked to the schools and my gen ed classes transfer. I’ll just work on those while I’m here.” She’s quiet. I’m sure processing what I’ve just said.

  “You’re not coming?” she says brokenly.

  “Not yet. I am, but I think being here at home it would be… easier while he’s gone. I know one day, if I get to be in your shoes and we’re married, that option won’t be as easy, but we’re so new, and he’d be leaving almost as soon as I got there. I just think it’s best to wait.”

  “I want to be with him as much as I can before he goes. We can’t stay at the barracks.”

  “No, and I know. I want the same thing. There has to be a solution.” I go to the oven to check the dip, and it’s ready. We serve up huge helpings, grab a bag of chips and a couple of bottles of water, and head to the living room.

  “There has to be something,” Savannah says, taking her first bite of dip. “Gah, this stuff is so damn good.”

  “I could eat it all day every day,” I agree. We finish off our plates, and that’s how Mom finds us.

  “Hey, you’re home early,” I tell her.

  “Yeah, I brought work home with me.” She points to the bag on her shoulder. “What are you girls doing?”

  “The guys got word they deploy this summer,” I tell her. Saying it out loud to my mom causes an onslaught of emotions I’ve been trying to push back to break free. I’m scared as hell for him. Even though I try to fight it, a tear slips down my cheek.

  “Oh no.” She drops her bag to the floor and sits in the recliner. “That changes your plans?” she asks me.

  “Yeah, I was going to tell him today, and I did, but we talked about it and we both agree not making the change yet is the best option.”

  Mom nods her agreement. “What about you, Savannah?”

  “It makes sense, but I want to be with him before he goes. We’ll be married, and even if it’s only a couple of weeks, I want that time with him.”

  “So we need a solution.”

  “Exactly.” I laugh. “We’ve been thinking and eating on it all day.” I point to our empty plates.

  “Your dad’s gonna love to see you made that.”

  “We better get more before he gets home,” I say, only half joking.

  “You know, what if the two of you moved down there temporarily. You could share an apartment. I’m sure the guys would be all for this and help out financially. Re
nt would be cheaper if you get a two bedroom and split it.”

  “What about our jobs? No way we can both take leave from the diner that long,” I ask.

  She shrugs. “Sometimes you have to pick your battles. What’s more important? I would say you both give notice now and give her time to replace you. When you get back, you can apply again, but chances are you’ll have to find another job somewhere else.”

  “It would be worth it.” Savannah perks up for the first time since we heard the news.

  “You think we can find a place for two months? I mean, Brandon said July, but they don’t know when. I don’t want to leave until he does.”

  “I’m sure you can. There are a few short-term stay places that are fully furnished,” Mom says casually, as if we’re discussing the weather.

  “How do you know this?” I ask her.

  “I’ve been looking online and even called a few since I knew what you were going to do.”

  “Thank you.” I jump from the couch and hug her. “I don’t know why we didn’t think of this.” I can’t believe that she did. Then again, I can. This is my mother we’re talking about. She knows how I feel about him and that my decision to move to North Carolina and switch schools is not one I came to lightly.

  “You’re too close to it. The pain of them leaving. Call the guys and see what they say. I’ll give you the information of the places I checked out. Fingers crossed they have an opening when you need it.”

  Immediately, we’re both on the phone calling the guys. They’re together and are on board before we can finish explaining. Just like that, a shit day turns not so shitty. He’s still leaving, but I get a good month, hopefully two with him before he has to go. That’s the best-case scenario.

  SINCE THE MOMENT I FOUND out the girls will be moving here temporarily, it’s all I can think about. I told her not to work while she’s here, that I can cover the cost. Combs agreed. Between the two of us, we can easily afford the rental on the apartment. It’s two months; I don’t care if I go broke because of it. Not that I will. The girls are driving their cars, and I’ve been checking my phone all damn day. Austyn has been checking in every few hours when they stop for food or gas. I hate the thought of her driving this far on her own, but she was quick to remind me she’s a big girl. They’re following one another, and if I know them, they’ve been on the phone talking all-things wedding since they pulled out on the road early this morning.

  My phone rings and I rush to pull it from my pocket and answer it. “Hey, you okay?”

  She laughs. “I’m fine, Slade. Just wanted to let you know the GPS says we’re about ten miles out.”

  “Ten miles.” My hearts pounds in my chest. Just ten miles and I’ll see my girl. I sit up from where I was lying on the bed in our new apartment. Yes, ours. No way am I not staying here with her. Combs said the same thing.

  “Yep. You are at the apartment?”

  “I am. We’re going to order some pizza. We figured you guys would be tired and hungry.”

  “What? You’re not making dinner?”

  I laugh. “Nope. I don’t plan on taking my hands off you when you get here.”

  She sighs. “Yeah?”

  “Uh-huh. Be safe, babe. I’ll see you in a few.” I end the call and open the bedroom door the same time Combs does. “Your fiancée call you?” I ask him. His face lights up when I call her that. Can’t say that I blame him.

  “Yeah, what kind of pizza you want?”

  “Anything. Austyn likes pepperoni,” I tell him.

  “She was mine first, Reeves. I know what she likes on her pizza.” He says this to get a rise out of me and even knowing that, it’s still gets to me.

  “She was your friend. She was never yours. She’s only ever been mine,” I remind him.

  He just shakes his head and smiles, while pulling up the number for the pizza place and ordering dinner. “Thanks for doing this, man. I don’t know that we could have afforded to otherwise.”

  “Are you kidding? Pass up the chance to spend every night with her? No thanks needed, my man. Enjoy your time with your future wife. I just hope it’s the end of July before we leave. The more time we have with them, the better.”

  Combs and I head outside to wait for the girls. I don’t know about him, but I’ve felt like a caged animal pacing, waiting for her to arrive. Austyn pulls in first, and I’m moving. My feet carry me toward her car, and by the time she stops and puts it in Park, I’m opening her door. I don’t give her time to get out. Instead, I drop to my knees and pull her into as much of a hug as I can with the seat belt between us.

  “Slade.” She laughs.

  Pulling back, I frame her face with my hands and kiss her, deep and slow, trying to show her how much I missed her, and how much it means to me that she’s here. She quit her job to spend a month with me. I can’t even explain what that does to me—knowing she’s in my corner and that we’re in this together.

  “I love you. I missed you,” I mumble against her lips, before going in for another taste.

  She’s smiling when I pull away, and those blue eyes of her are sparkling. “Can I get out of the car?”

  “Good plan.” I reach over and unbuckle her seat belt. Standing to my full height, I offer her my hand and help her out of the car. This time, I wrap my arms around her, bury my face in her neck, and lift her feet off the ground. “You’re really here,” I murmur.

  Her hold on me is tight. “I’m really here. I’m not leaving until you do.”

  “I missed you so fucking much,” I tell her again.

  “I missed you too, knight.”

  I set her back on her feet with a quick kiss. “Let’s grab your bags. Pizza should be here soon.”

  “How is it?” she asks, referring to the apartment.

  “Good. It’s not the Ritz, but it’s clean, and there are two bedrooms. Fuck, Austyn, it could be a cardboard box, and as long as you’re with me, I’ll be a happy man.”

  “Yeah, no cardboard boxes, though.” She pokes my side.

  “Not for you, angel. Never for you.” I kiss her temple and grab three of her five bags. “Leave those. I’ll come back and get them.”

  “I’m capable of carrying them, Slade.”

  I don’t argue with her. I know I won’t win. Besides, I don’t want her first day here to be about a silly argument.

  By the time we have her bags in our room, the pizza is delivered. The four of us sit around the tiny four-person kitchen table and eat. The girls talk about the drive up, and just as I guessed, they talked on the phone the majority of the time.

  When Austyn yawns for what seems like the tenth time, I stand and offer her my hand. “Let’s get you to bed.”

  “I’m sure you’re exhausted too,” Combs says, standing and doing the same.

  I tune them out and focus on my girl. Reaching for her, she laces her fingers through mine, and I lead her to our room. Once inside, I lock the door. I want to ravish her, but I can see the exhaustion. “Let’s get you undressed.” I reach for the hem of her tank top and pull it over her head. She reaches behind her and takes off her bra. Meanwhile, I unbutton her shorts, tracing my hands up her sides, loving the feel of her skin against mine. She drops her bra to the floor and shimmies out of her shorts and panties.

  “Your turn,” she says, huskily lifting my shirt. I have to bend to help her get it off, making her laugh.

  I take over and quickly discard my shorts and boxer briefs. Grabbing her hand, I lead her to the bed and hold the covers up for her. She climbs in, with me following after her. She snuggles in next to me. With my arm around her, I release a sigh of contentment. Kissing her temple, I enjoy the feel of her silky-smooth skin against mine.

  “I can’t believe I’m here.”

  “Here in North Carolina or in our bed?”

  “Our bed. I like the sound of that.”

  “Me too.”

  “Both. The last time I saw you it was when you surprised me and stayed with us. I didn’t get to
lie with you like this. It’s my favorite thing.”

  “Anytime I get with you is my favorite thing.”

  “Aww,” she says through a yawn.

  “Get some sleep, angel.” I kiss her temple one last time, then close my eyes, drifting off to sleep with my entire world in my arms.

  IT’S HOT, TOO HOT. I go to move the covers and feel a heavy hand holding me still. Slade. I can’t believe I just fell asleep on him. That’s not how I planned our reunion to go. Carefully, I lift my head to look at the clock. It’s three in the morning. We went to bed fairly early, but now I’m wide-awake. How can I not be with his naked body snuggled up against mine? Tomorrow is Saturday, and he’s assured me that he’s off all weekend. Waking him up shouldn’t be an issue.

  Rolling over, careful not to wake him just yet, I rest my hand on his chiseled chest. He’s more defined than the last time I saw him. That’s saying something. I can’t imagine the workouts he’s put through as a marine, the training. I close my eyes and feel his heart beat against my palm, praying he returns to me, safe and sound.

  My hand roams down his chest until I reach the V at his waistline. Going lower, I palm him in my hand, loving the velvety feel of him.

  “Austyn,” he murmurs.

  I’m not sure if he’s asleep or awake, but I don’t stop. I want him. No, I need him. It’s been too long, and I need him to fill me. I need to know this is real. That I’m really here with him until he has to leave. I pump him a few times, slowly, leisurely.

  “Love your hands on me,” his sleepy voice greets me.

  “Yeah?” I whisper into the darkness.

  “Yeah, only one thing I love more,” he says groggily.

  “What’s that?” I ask, still stroking him.

  “My hands on you.” He rolls me over and settles himself between my legs. When his lips find mine, I open for him, letting his tongue caress mine. “God, I fucking missed you,” he breathes into me.

  “Make love to me.”

  “Let me get a condom,” he says, kissing me chastely, then moving out of my embrace.