by T. S. Frost
Kate nodded, still wearing that bittersweet-happy smile.
Suddenly Alexa knew this wasn't some sort of hallucination or dream or joke and before she even realized she was moving she'd reached the doorway and wrapped her arms around her aunt in the fiercest hug she'd ever given.
Kate was warm and familiar and–well maybe a little smaller than she remembered last, but Kate was right, she had gotten taller–and felt so safe and her voice was so calming and Alexa hadn't realized, even with thinking about her family every day, just how much she'd missed this.
Kate hugged her back just as strongly, and said softly, “I missed you too, Alexa.”
They stayed like that in the doorway for a long time–Alexa was irrationally afraid that if she let go Kate would just evaporate into thin air, and it was impossible of course but she couldn't bring herself to care–and her aunt seemed to think the same thing because she showed no signs of letting go either.
Vaguely, distantly, Alexa was aware of a quiet shuffle as Casey shifted away and relocated to a corner, probably uncomfortable with the display of raw emotion, but she found it hard to care about that either at the moment. Nothing mattered but this. Three years, and she'd finally found her family again.
After a long time Alexa finally pulled away, and Kate reluctantly let go as well. Grinning widely, she asked excitedly, “Are Mom and Dad with you? And Grandpa, is he–or, um, well, I guess you might not know–”
Kate led her over to one of the cots so they could sit, pulling off her thick winter coat. “Alexa, I... this isn't going to be easy, but...”
Alexa listened, eyes wide, numb with shock, as her aunt explained why Alexa didn't have parents anymore as gently as she could, how Kate still didn't know where her father was. Alexa didn't want to accept it as real. It couldn't be real. It was not possible and she refused to acknowledge it, her brain couldn't comprehend the news, in the exact same way she could barely comprehend that her Aunt Kate was here just a few minutes ago.
It wasn't real until Kate finished, and whispered softly, “Oh, Alexa, I'm so sorry,” and drew her into another hug. And suddenly she couldn't stop it from being true anymore and it hurt, it hurt so badly it burned inside of her.
Her heart was so constricted she couldn't breathe and her throat was thick and clogged and it hurt to swallow. Her eyes prickled painfully and the tears she'd kept herself from shedding for three years from determination finally fought their way out. She buried her face in her aunt's shoulder and she clung to her and sobbed.
She didn't care who saw it, her aunt, Casey, the whole world. She could feel her aunt rubbing her back comfortingly, but Kate's shoulder was shaking too and Alexa knew she wasn't the only one finally cracking under the joy of finding family again and the sorrow of knowing not everybody who was supposed to be there was, or would be, ever again.
But that was okay too, because they were family and they understood the other's loss in ways no one else could understand. For all the bad things that had happened, they were still together again, so somehow, everything might be okay one day. And most of all, they finally had answers.
Not all of them happy, but they knew now, and there was resolution somehow, and those things could finally be met head on and dealt with and gotten through, and now one day they knew for sure they'd finally be able to move on. Just like Casey had said once, long ago, back in New Avalon. And he'd been right.
They stayed like that for a long, long time. So long that it had gotten dark out, and the room was gloomy and filled with shadows, other than the candles now around them which Alexa knew hadn't been there before. Casey must have lit them, but she never heard her friend move or saw him at work.
She didn't really care about that, anyway. She just focused on her Aunt Kate, clinging to her and sharing her grief but also strangely happy, because it was horrible but at least she was here. Finally, after a long time they both quieted, but even then they still hugged, taking some small comfort in the other's presence.
Until finally Alexa felt... well, not good, exactly, but better, at least, and she knew it would take her a while to get through it completely but at least she could move on for the moment. And she had to help in her own way, too. “I don't know if Grandpa's dead, Aunt Kate. Blake thinks he might have survived. He's not on the confirmed military KIA list, anyway.”
“Blake?” Her aunt asked in confusion. Kate released her from the hug and Alexa sat back on the edge of the cot again next to her, looking her in the eye.
“He's in charge of New Avalon.”
“You've been making some... interesting friends,” Kate noted. “The leader of New Avalon... Casey...” They both glanced over at Casey, who had tucked himself quietly back into the farthest shadowy corner of the room and was pointedly looking away from them, clearly uncomfortable with the emotional displays. He seemed to be trying to give them some space, while not leaving entirely and earning more of Alexa's wrath.
“Tell me about it,” Alexa said, with another weak grin.
“Your grandfather would be impressed,” Kate noted, with a weak smile of her own. “We'll have to tell him all about it when this is over, since I'm sure Blake's intuition is accurate.” Her smile grew a little bigger. “But in the meantime, you'll have to tell me all about it. You mentioned having some good stories...”
It was a clever segue into a happier discussion. Alexa caught it, but she didn't care. It made sense for her aunt– Kate had always loved people and their stories–besides, she did have some good stories, things Kate was definitely not going to believe.
So she told them. She spent hours telling them, well into the night, and she barely approached a fraction of them, but it didn't matter. Her aunt was a great audience, commenting and reacting in all the right places, and Casey was still over in the corner listening but he'd always been a good listener, and his minute frowns and smirks were indicators that he was paying attention even when he was giving them space.
When she finally skipped ahead of herself late that night to explain precisely why she was bumming around with a clone, enthusiastically re-telling her tale about finding Gentech, Aunt Kate finally interrupted her to look over in the corner. “You really don't have to stay over there, you know,” she said, raising an eyebrow and waving Casey over.
Casey seemed a little hesitant to approach. “It's been over three years for you guys. I don't want to get in the way.”
“Geez, just get over here,” Alexa said with a laugh. “We're at your part of the story anyway, you gotta help tell it!”
Casey still seemed hesitant–Alexa realized he was behaving like an outsider would, still trying to give them space, like he figured he didn't belong to the dynamic. “C'mon, man,” she insisted, “We're family, right? I've been telling you for months we're practically siblings. I even offered to let you use my last name. That doesn't change just because you've got an aunt now, too.”
“Because I have an aunt?” Casey looked confused, and looked over at Kate with a blink. “You don't... mind that I'm here?”
Kate shook her head at him. “I'll admit I've never had a nephew before, but after Alexa here, how hard could it be? I think I can adjust.” She smiled. “Besides, I could do worse. You're the one that got us back in touch, after all–that's pretty incredible. If that doesn't make you part of the family I don't know what would.”
Casey still looked a little puzzled, and Alexa almost felt sorry for him–even after months of working with her, the clone still wasn't used to a family dynamic. But after a moment Casey's expression softened, and he came forward almost tentatively to sit on the edge of the cot adjacent to theirs. “Okay then.”
So Alexa continued telling of their more recent travels, ever since May when she first found Casey locked away in that Gentech pod–and it had only been about six months, but it felt like she'd always known Casey by now.
The clone offered his own memories and experiences on the trip, hesitantly at first but gradually more confidently as he started adjust
ing to the concept of Kate as a parental figure and not just a stranger he was escorting across the country.
Kate listened with genuine interest and remarkable patience, but it was when Alexa got to the last leg of their journey to the Base, and Casey's force-run for the last hundred or more miles of the trip, that she looked rattled.
“Not gonna lie,” Alexa admitted, “I was... well, I almost didn't make it here at all. I definitely would have died months ago if Casey wasn't there. He saved my life, like a lot. So. I guess there are still heroes in this age after all, right?” She grinned.
The grin grew wider when Aunt Kate, still looking unsettled at the near-miss, turned and gave Casey a hug that might have been bone-crushing to anyone else–because Casey's thoroughly shocked, uncomfortable look and stiff posture at the at the touch was too hilarious not to laugh at. “Did you really save her life?” she asked.
“She started it,” Casey muttered, still looking a little uncomfortable.
“I thought you said you didn't help me 'cause you owed me,” Alexa accused.
“I didn't. I'm just saying, that's where I learned it from.”
Aunt Kate, perceptive as usual, let him go before he became too uncomfortable, but not before she murmured, “Thank you for saving my niece. And for getting me back to her. Really.”
Casey shrugged. “I couldn't just leave her there. Like she said... family.”
Kate smiled. “Well, you're definitely part of this one now.” Casey offered a tentative smirk, but Alexa could tell her usually quiet friend's moods enough by now to know he was happy, and enjoyed having a place.
There was silence for a long time, but it was comfortable, even for Alexa who as a general rule was not so fond of quiet for extended periods of time in places where zoms were not a threat. After a while it became too much for her, and she broke it with a tentative, “I'm, uh... not really sure where we go from here.”
Casey almost immediately frowned. “You two aren't going anywhere until spring. Winter travel with one person through a predetermined path was hard enough.”
Alexa laughed. “Not what I meant, LS.” She tried to gather her thoughts, and added, “I meant... I've been looking for my family for... well, since Z-day. For answers. And now... well...” She swallowed a little. She definitely had answers all right, but she didn't want to think about some of them right now. Aunt Kate put a sympathetic arm around her shoulders and pulled her a little closer.
“There's still your grandpa,” Casey pointed out.
“That's true,” Alexa admitted. “Maybe... New Avalon again, next? Blake's the one that got us here. Maybe he'll have another lead for us by the time we get back next year.” She grinned at her aunt. “You'll like it there. Maybe we'll even stay there a little longer than last time. I bet Blake'd like that.”
“Better than here,” Casey said. “I, uh, have a feeling we might get kicked out, when the thaw hits.” Alexa gave him an incredulous look that she knew was mirrored on her aunt's face, and Casey said a little defensively, “The commander, uh, knows about me. I reached a truce with him so you'd get medical help but I might have threatened to destroy the whole place, a little bit, at one point, so...”
Alexa groaned and smacked a hand over her eyes. “You didn't.”
“They were being stupid, okay!”
“It might be a good idea to leave as soon as we can, then,” Aunt Kate said slowly. “Before they decide to... weaponize... Casey. Not that they would, but better safe than sorry, I think...”
“Okay,” Alexa said decisively, paling at the thought of her brother being used like that, after all the trouble she'd gone through to get him out of that situation, “New Avalon or bust, ASAP. Aunt Kate, we can start getting you ready for the long haul so you'll be good to go by the time spring hits, the first thing to practice is running, like a lot...”
As Alexa fell into the comfortable rhythm of explaining, once again, the finer details and intricacies of zom travel, she decided... things were going to be okay. They could do this. She'd found her answers, found her family–old and new–and there would always be something to work towards in this new age. It might be the apocalypse, but they were still going strong, and they weren't stopping for anything.
It was what they did best as humans, after all.
Acknowledgments
To Sharda and Krimoa28 for sharing their knowledge of sailing.
To J.B. for helping outline New Avalon and its defenses.
To Gigi_01 and Anna R. for patiently helping with all my grammar problems.
And especially to Karma for inspiration, encouragement, and support. I never could have done it without you.
Table of Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Epilogue