The DJ yelled out, “Is everyone having a good time tonight!” The men and women in the club screamed and cheered. “I said is everyone having a good time tonight!” They all screamed, hooped, and hollered even louder. “Next on stage…she’s from Chicago. It might be the second city, but she’ll be first in your hearts…give it up for Harriet Drezden!”
Harriet was the shortest girl in the club. She barely stood three feet, and that was in heels. Her fake breasts were actually bigger than her head, and they were barely concealed by her tiny leather duster. She walked out as Lenny Kravitz “American Woman” started blasting out from the speakers. Even Damien wanted to stand up and clap as the woman flung her duster off exposing both giant breasts. Instead all he could do was say through his speakers, “Yeah baby. Shake it for Daddy.”
“Would you like a dance?” Sukya said with more than a hint of down home southern charm. The tourists ate the southern drawl up, and the locals were too busy staring at her tits to care.
“Yes please, but you will have to take the money out from my wallet. It is on the side.” Damien said. Sukya stepped around and found the young man’s wallet.
“Damn boy…you’re loaded. How about we go back to the Champagne Room for a little more private time?” Sukya asked seductively as she eyed his thick wallet stuffed with twenties and fifties.
“Ship yes.” Damien answered, and followed the blonde through the crowd. “Out of curiosity, is the Chris Rock song about no sex in the Champagne Room wrong.”
“Baby with this kind of cash you can have whatever you want in the Champagne Room.” Sukya laughed.
“Ah…rue.”
***
Callie Hix leaned over the bar and grinned, “So cutie…what’s a girl got to do to get hired around here?”
Mortimer Jenks, or Mo as most of the regulars called him cleaned the glass and never even looked up, “Be about a foot and a have shorter, and lose nine inches.”
“Wait…what? You want me to lose a foot and a half, and nine inches? What the hell are you talking about?” Callie asked.
Mortimer looked up, and his comb-over flopped over exposing his bald head, “We only hire little people here. You’re too tall, and I’ve seen one of your videos. All our women have to be women.” Then Mortimer turned his attention back to cleaning the glass. “Damn spot.”
“I’m a hell of a dancer, and I’d bring plenty of money in. Not just from walk-ins either. I have plenty of fans that’ll pay to watch me dance. Come on…give me a chance.” Callie smiled.
“Sorry…we have a no cock policy for our dancers. Besides, I’m not stupid. I know most of the other club owners personally, and I already know about you trying to stab a cop with your heel. You’ve been banned from almost every other strip club in the city for a reason. You’re welcome to stay and drink, but I’m sorry…I just can’t hire you.” Mortimer said with a grin as he finally got the spot removed.
“You midget fucker! I don’t have to put up with this shit from the likes of you. I’m a star! I can do so much better than this rat hole.” Callie screamed.
“Angus! One for pickup!” Mortimer barked.
Angus stomped over to Callie, “Come with me Ma’am.”
“Keep your filthy midget hands off of me.” Callie howled.
Angus snapped his fingers, “Boys.”
All of the clubs bouncers surrounded Callie Hix and lifted her up like they were carrying a roll of carpet. The skinny blonde screamed and kicked, but the men didn’t put her down until they had her outside the club. Angus handed the shemale her purse and said, “Thank you and have a nice day.”
“Fuck you!” Callie spat.
“Sorry…you got a pretty wrapping babe, but I don’t go for chicks with dicks.” Angus laughed as he walked back into the club.
Callie screamed with frustration and then started walking towards Bourbon Street. She took out her phone and called her manager, “Rex! This is Callie. Is that part in the movie still open? Yeah I can be over there tonight as long as the check clears. Tell them to have my contract ready.”
***
“Next up on stage! Jasmine Vayl!” A young black woman bounced across the stage on her butt to “More Human Than Human” from White Zombie. She bounced around the stage before crawling up the brass pole. When she reached the top, Jasmine slid down the pole with a loud squeak as her thighs gripped the pole.
“Colt! This place is awesome. Hey…what’s that over there?” Bobby asked the waitress as she walked by.
“That’s for midget tossing.” The waitress answered.
Bobby’s eyes got huge, and he looked like a child that just woke up on Christmas morning, “No!”
“Yeah, and if you set the record all your drinks are free.” The waitress said.
“Well shit! Sign me up!” Bobby said as he stood up to walk over there.
***
Sukya bounced and ground on Damien’s crotch. “You like that baby?”
Damien would have been happy to respond, but for her to give him the lapdance, she had to move all the computers and sensors away from his lap. The only thing left for Damien was the tube that he blew into so that he could move. Sukya pumped her hips back and forth, and Damien could only sit there in silence.
“Well, we know at least one thing that still works.” Sukya laughed as she felt the young man’s groin swell under her. She whipped her hair around and gyrated all over his body. Damien had never had a woman writhe all over him like this before, and he was so aroused that he began to change. Both of his feet ripped through his shoes, his chest bulked up and got hairy, eyes changed to yellow wolf eyes, but the only part Sukya noticed was the three foot long penis that ripped its way up through the front of Damien’s pants. “Oh my...Baby where have you been all my life?”
Sukya marveled at the heft of it. It was thick, and veiny, and menacing. “What’s this for?” Sukya asked as she looked at the catheter tube that ran from the head of Damien’s penis down to his empty urine bag. Fortunately for Damien, the blonde completely misunderstood the purpose of the tube and bag, or she might have lost interest immediately. “You kinky motherfucker.” She said as she began to stroke it. “You like that baby?”
When Damien didn’t respond, she stopped and moved his computers and sensors back in place. “Thank you.”
“No Baby…thank you. I’ve been waiting my entire life for a cock like this.” Sukya answered as she began stroking him again. It didn’t take long before Damien was close.
“Gopher, fish, donut, Batman.” Damien’s eyes fluttered from word to word as he neared his orgasm. When Sukya started playing with his testicles it just proved too much for the young man. In seconds his urine bag was filled with semen, and Damien just kept cumming. Even after his dick went limp, semen kept oozing out. The only sound he made came from his labored breathing and when his computer read one of his eye flutters as a word choice. The urine bag burst and it looked like someone had dropped a jar of mayonnaise on the floor. “So good.”
“It’s just a shame you already finished. I kind of wanted to give that big anaconda a ride, but I guess…WOW!” It really was all she could say as she watched his cock grow rock hard at the mention of sex.
“Take out the tube, and bend over.” Damien ordered.
Sukya did exactly what he said. There was a little bit of blood as she pulled the catheter out, but Damien didn’t seem to mind it. “Do you have a condom baby?”
“No. Is that a problem.”
“It’ll cost extra.” Sukya said, but honestly looking at the size of his manhood, she considered giving him a freebie. He was absolutely huge.
“I will pay it.”
Sukya pulled her g-string down and bent over. She was too short initially, but then she watched as Damien’s shocks lowered him into position. Sukya reached back and positioned the man at her entrance. “Go easy. I’m going to need some time to adjust.”
Damien blew into his tube, and the wheelchair moved forward. He slowly began to
press against her. His hard cock bent for a second, and then slipped between her folds. Sukya gasped, “Holy shit! I can’t believe it’s actually inside.”
Damien blew and sucked to move himself in and out. It was slow at first. Every time he started to push in his penis bent under the added pressure before slipping inside. As she grew more wet, Damien started to blow and suck faster to build his rhythm. The wheelchair rolled forward and back as he buried himself into her.
Ten minutes later Sukya was howling as the man had his chair going back and forth as quickly as he could make it go. Damien was practically hyperventilating as he blew out and sucked back in as hard and fast as he could. Sukya was going wild with every pump of the man’s cock. “Oh gawd! I love it. Fuck my nasty pussy you crippled son of a bitch!”
If Damien was offended, he certainly didn’t let it show. He didn’t stop, he didn’t slow down. He just kept driving himself in and out of her at a maddening pace. He was getting so close, but he was trying to hold out. He wanted to feel her climax. He’d felt the first few flutters of an impending orgasm, but Damien just couldn’t get going fast enough to really get the woman to climax. Instead he’d kept her just on the edge of orgasm for almost four minutes.
Sukya couldn’t stand it anymore. She’d been so close that her pussy was actually throbbing as it begged for some sort of release. She reached between her legs and started rubbing her clit as fast as possible. “Oh FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!” She gasped as her inner walls clenched and spasmed around Damien’s throbbing hardness.
“I’m going to cum. I can not hold out any longer.” Damien said. His mechanical voice never even once giving away the struggle Damien was having in avoiding ejaculation at that moment.
“Fill me up! Pump me full of your cum!” Sukya howled as one of her orgasmic aftershocks suddenly became a full blown orgasm in its own right. It was too much for the young man. Thick, gooey, and slightly green semen blasted out of Damien like an uncontrolled fire hose. There was so much pressure built up that when it roared forth from the undead werewolf it actually shot Sukya across the room. She splatted against the wall, and was pinned there as blast after blast of semen. She was coated with a slightly green splash of ejaculate that left her looking not unlike a Krispy Kreme donut.
“Ah…ah…ah…rue” Damien’s robotic voice howled over the speakers as he kept spurting. When he was done there was hardly even a hint of the black wall. Slightly green semen splattered the entire all, and Sukya was still sliding down the gooey mess that they’d both made.
“Sorry, I guess I was a little backed up.” Damien said.
Sukya finally reached the ground and sort of just peeled off the wall. She flopped onto her back in a puddle of semen. She couldn’t even answer the man. Instead she just giggled and gave him thumbs up.
“Hey Sukya! You decent in there? We got a little girl outside that says her man is in here, and it sounds like…” Jasmine Vayl said as she peeked inside the private room. She saw Sukya covered in jism with her legs spread still giggling as Damien’s giant cock still dribbled cum. “Shit! I need to find me a crippled man.”
“Room for one more.” Damien said as his limp dick started to grow hard again.
“Sorry big guy, and I mean it. I’d love to ride that pony, but there’s a girl outside acting a little crazy, and so you’re going to have to go.” Jasmine said.
“Well ship. Can we pretend that I am not here.” Damien said.
“Sorry, and you’re going to have to put that monster away before you leave the room.” Jasmine said. “Sukya, are you going to be able to help this man outside.”
“I can’t feel my legs.” Sukya laughed.
“I’ll help you zip it back up, but then we gotta get you out there. She’s getting pretty agitated.” Jasmine said.
***
“One, two, three!” The five bouncers screamed as they threw Bobby into the air. Bobby did just as they said. He held himself as rigid and stiff as a board when they were readying to throw him, and then when he was in the air he stretched out.
“Go Coonass!” Colton screamed as he watched his friend get midget tossed. It was a very different version than most people would have expected. In just about any other bar the midgets were the ones sent sailing, but here at Shorty’s the little people did the tossing. Colton laughed as he saw his best friend treat the whole experience with all the seriousness of an Olympic event. Bobby strained to stretch out for every inch.
The club was hopping. A stripper by the name of Stephanie King was jackhammering her pelvis into the air. The bartender was pouring drinks as fast as he could. Beautiful midget strippers were giving lapdances all throughout the club. Bobby could even see the little handicapped guy wheeling back through the crowd as he drifted through the air. Bobby was certain he’d beat the record. He could see the line on the ground. His hands were going to hit a good three inches past the line. Free beer, midget strippers, and a great friend like Colton to spend the evening with had Bobby thinking that he was a dead ex-wife away from this being the best night of his life. That’s when the top half of Angus the bouncer went flying past him leaving a trail of blood and organs.
Chapter Fifty-Three
“Are you absolutely sure you want to do this?” Sarah asked.
“It might help if we had some idea how these zombies got started.” B.J. answered.
A fifty something woman with curly blonde hair and a face that had seen a face lift or two walked up to the crowd. “Hello.” She said.
“That’s the lady I booked this with. Natalie Yates.” B.J. said.
“Hello, I’m Mistress Bloodraven.” Natalie said in what could only be called a truly horrible fake Transylvanian movie accent.
Sarah snickered, “I think we aren’t going to learn nearly as much as you thought.” B.J. glared at Mistress Bloodraven and contemplated how to get her money back.
“Tonight we have some special guests.” Mistress Bloodraven grinned. “First author Sarah Mudd.” The group clapped as Sarah waved sheepishly. She hadn’t expected to be put on the spot like this, and hated it when people pointed her out just to impress other guests. “Our other group of guests are the world famous men from the all-male review Genitalia from Australia.”
Eighteen perfect physical specimens walked around the corner, each man looking more Adonis-like than the next. Several of the men waved and smiled while saying, “G’day!”
Suddenly B.J. wasn’t so concerned with getting her money back. Instead she was focused on how to get as many of those men in a boat with her. Sarah and B.J. both watched the men like two hawks watching a mouse. Sarah leaned over and whispered, “You know that promise I made about letting you sleep? Don’t count on it. I just got enough eye candy for the next month.”
“Nope. They’re all mine. I called it.” B.J. giggled. “Besides you’re married.”
“I’m married, but I’m not blind. Besides if my hubby can go to see strippers tonight then he certainly can’t complain if strippers just fall into my lap…repeatedly, and with vigor.” Sarah grinned, “Besides, there’s never any harm in window shopping as long as I don’t try to buy anything.”
Mistress Bloodraven then pointed at the airboats, “If you’ll all climb up on the airboats we’ll depart for our spooky decent into the scary world of voodoo.”
At first B.J. tried to follow the men from Genitalia from Australia, but Sarah grabbed her arm and started walking to one of the boats instead. “Noooo…me want.” B.J. said under her breath.
“Trust me.” Sarah said as she got them onto the first airboat. “Now watch.”
B.J. and Sarah watched patiently as the crowd of mostly women tried their hardest to stay with the muscular men. The married women lingered around the outside with their husbands waiting to see what boat to jump on. The single women were the ones closest, asking questions, and trying to touch. Then there were the people that really didn’t care one way or another, but just hovered around to watch the commotion. “It’s like watching
those nature shows where the pack keeps harassing the herd until they separate one of the weaker ones and then drag it down to eat. Meanwhile scavengers are circling.” B.J. laughed. The male dancers huddled around one another for protection from the salivating women. Little Brad was the first one picked off as saintly nuns somehow managed to get him distracted long enough while their two sisters stepped into the gap between Brad and his friends. “I would never have believed it if I didn’t see it with my own two eyes.”
“What? Nuns are just like any other woman. They might not actually get to ride the ride, but that sure won’t stop them from appreciating the view.” Sarah said.
The men made a break for it. The boats could hold six people not counting the drivers. Sarah and B.J. watched patiently as the first of the men practically leapt onto the boat with them. The oldest of the men, with just a hint of gray in his hair was named Paul, he introduced the others. B.J. grinned as Paul called the youngest one Avery, and then giggled like a little girl when he introduced the two as “Fish and Chips.” Markus Fish, and Simon Chips both seemed as interested in B.J. as she was in them. Sarah sat in one chair between Paul and Avery, while B.J. was sandwiched between “Fish and Chips”.
The other men realized that the one boat was full panicked and began to scatter to the other boats. As they broke apart the women snatched them up like the easy prey they were. It wasn’t long before all the men were divided one or two to a boat with everyone else. Meanwhile Sarah and B.J. had the lions share, and were getting plenty of attention from the four men. Paul showed Sarah a picture of his two daughters and his very pregnant wife at home, and Avery talking about his boyfriend Gabriel, and their adopted daughter Faith. Meanwhile Fish and Chips were both single men that had become very good friends since being paired together for the show.
The name combination was what got them stuck together, but once they started working together they realized they complimented one another perfectly. The two men were the hottest part of the show for most of the women that came to see it. They were always having little friendly competitions with one another, and it was no different with B.J. As a beautiful young American woman, the two men couldn’t resist falling all over themselves in an attempt to win her affections. They both wanted to be able to brag to the other how they’d gotten a date with the pretty caramel skinned woman, and B.J. wasn’t complaining about all the attention.
Uncle Gary's Campfire Stories: Bayou Zombie Werewolves Page 55