by J. J. Bonds
Luka holds my gaze, and, although I try to look away, I find that I can’t. He’s salivating now, panting like a dog as the thirst overcomes him. “If you won’t join me, then you’re only good for one thing,” he says, parting his lips and revealing his fangs. It seems he’s decided that if I won’t be his mate, I’m fit only to die.
I say a silent prayer and will myself to be brave. I will not cry. I will not beg. I don’t want to die, and for the first time in a long time I realize how desperately I want to live. Really live. Despite everything that’s happened, everything I’ve done, I want a chance to make things right, to make my parents proud. As I prepare myself for the inevitable, I hope that I’ll at least be rejoined with them in death.
As Luka closes in on me, his grin widening with every step, Nik charges into the clearing and tackles him. Their bodies roll sideways, and Luka is thrown into the air. He lands on his feet and wastes no time launching a counterattack against Nik. Their bodies collide in mid-air at full force. Nik lands a fist on Luka’s jaw and the sound of crunching bone resonates through the air. I find it deeply satisfying. Still, I’m worried for his safety.
With renewed determination, I focus all of my energy on pushing Luka from my mind. I have no idea what I’m doing really, but I concentrate on expelling the poisonous tentacles that seem to have settled over my brain. I have to do this. I have to help Nik. I know he’s a skilled fighter, but he’s still in danger. Because of me. This isn’t his fight, and yet here he is engaged in a bloody death-match with Luka. I won’t be able to live with myself if anything happens to him.
I will my body to follow the commands I issue. I find that I can move slowly if I direct all of my energy on one simple task—walking. It’s difficult to do with the battle taking place just a few feet away, but it might be our only chance. I just hope I’m fast enough.
I move deliberately toward the discarded crossbow. Thankfully, I find it just a few feet away. I’m gaining better control of my motor skills now, although I still feel lethargic. I reach to the ground and scoop up the crossbow, bringing it immediately to my shoulder. As I take aim, I falter. Nik and Luka are embroiled in an all-out slugfest. They’re moving so fast that it’s almost as if they occupy the same space. If I don’t time the shot right, I could kill Nik. There can be no hesitation when I pull the trigger.
I bring the scope to my eye and watch them. I study their moves for what seems like an eternity but in reality is only seconds. Nik kicks Luka in the stomach and follows up with a second rapid-fire kick to the jaw. Blood spurts from his mouth. Nik is also bleeding. Luka’s likely broken his nose judging by the blood that’s gushing from it. The blood runs freely down his chin and onto his shirt. I feel my own stomach tighten at the sight of it.
I take a deep breath and let my instincts take over as Nik has taught me. I free my mind allowing it to anticipate their next moves, my finger balanced precariously on the trigger. I take the shot almost without knowing it.
Luka’s head explodes as the Annihilator enters his temple. His body drops to the ground twitching. Nik places his boot on Luka’s chest and pulls a knife from his belt. I watch silently as he removes what’s left of the head.
It’s over. I feel the last remnants of Luka’s grip on me slip away. The Vampiric Nexus has been permanently severed.
“Nice shot.”
“Yeah? Well, I had a good teacher.” I walk over and stand by Nik’s side, forcing myself to look at the bloody heap at his feet.
“For a minute there, I thought you were going to shoot me,” he teases, wincing in pain.
“That makes two of us.” I smile wryly as his arm encircles me protectively. For once, I don’t resist and lay my head softly on his chest. I’m too tired to fight anymore. “Let’s get a fire going and get out of here. I don’t know about you, but I’ve had enough fun for one night.”
Nik wipes the blood from his face and adjusts his broken nose. I cringe at the sound of the shifting cartilage. Although I know he has to set it quickly, the pain must be agonizing. He moves efficiently from this task to the next and once again collects kindling for the fire. I leave him to it and stare grimly at Luka’s remains. He doesn’t look nearly as menacing in two pieces.
“He got what he deserved,” Nik says rejoining me. He squats to the ground and stacks the firewood before throwing Luka’s remains into the pile.
“I know.” I don’t feel remorse for killing him. It’s all of the lives he destroyed that weigh on my mind. All of the lives I’ve destroyed. There are a lot of bodies on my conscience, and now it seems I’ll have to add my parents to the list.
Nik lights the flame, and we step back to watch Luka’s body burn.
“It’s not your fault, Katia.” Nik reaches out and takes my hand. “The things he did. They weren’t because of you. He twisted his actions to make you feel guilty. He was a plague on this earth.”
“I know.”
“Do you?” He asks turning me to face him. “I don’t think you do. There was nothing that you could have done to save your parents. There was nothing you could have done to save Damian.”
He heard everything. He must have been close by the whole time, just waiting for an opportunity to catch Luka off guard. I shift my weight and cross my hands over my chest defiantly. “Now you know all of my dirty little secrets.”
“I don’t care about any of that stuff, Katia. So what if you were born human? That doesn’t matter to me. It doesn’t change who you are. It doesn’t change how I see you.”
His words get caught up with emotion at this last part. He runs his hands through his hair, pushing the dark curls back from his forehead in frustration. His hands settle on the back of his neck, and he turns his back to me so that I can’t see his face. It’s too late. I’ve already heard the anguish in his voice.
I feel my resolve melting. He too has had a rough night. Not only did he find out that everything he thought he knew about me was a lie, he’s faced a demon from hell. His clothes are dirty, his shirt is torn, and he’s covered in blood. I can only imagine what a train wreck I must be.
“Don’t act like it doesn’t matter,” I tell him running my hands over my wrists, touching my scars self-consciously. “I lied to everyone. I killed innocents. Those aren’t small matters.”
He turns to face me again. “You lied because you had to. You fed in order to survive. And, from the sounds of it, those victims,” he emphasizes the word to imply he doesn’t think they’re victims at all, “were far from innocent.”
There’s nothing I can say to justify my actions. Even if there were, I wouldn’t try. It doesn’t matter how despicable my victims were. What I did to them was wrong. I’ll never be able to forget what I’ve done. I’ll never be able to forget their faces. Nor would I want to. I push a strand of bloody hair back from my face and come to the realization that Nik can’t understand because he’s never taken an innocent life. He’s never drained a human and watched as the light faded from their eyes, leaving nothing but an empty husk.
Nik growls in exasperation. My silence is not the response he was hoping for. “I’m not saying those things don’t matter. I’m saying I understand that you did what you had to do. It’s what any of us would have done in your place. You survived, Katia. And you came out stronger for it. You can’t punish yourself for that.”
His words do little to ease my shame. I can’t bring myself to meet his eyes. Instead, I focus on the flames. I watch as Luka’s body crumbles into nothing but a pile of dust.
“You have a good heart, Katia. I know it.” The passion in his voice is unnerving. It reminds me of Aldo. There’s no reasoning with either of them once they’ve made up their minds.
We stand in silence until the flames burn down. Once they smolder, Nik stamps them out with his foot.
“Ready to go?”
“Not really,” I tell him truthfully. “I’d like nothing more than to run, but if I learned anything tonight it’s that my problems have a way of following. I’ve
got to go back. I’ll have to face Blaine and deal with the fallout.”
“Everything is going to be alright,” he assures me, taking my hand again. The sun is coming up. It rises over the forest announcing the arrival of a new day.
“Easy for you to say.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
We manage to sneak back onto campus through the stables. I don’t know why I didn’t think of it before. I’ve seen Keegan jump the horses over the back corral more times than I care to count. I don’t know how the Pazitor ever left such an obvious breach in security, but I’m not complaining. I know that even if Keegan catches us, he won’t give us any trouble.
Nik escorts me to my room and leaves to update Anya on the night’s events. I need to call Aldo, but I’m not doing anything until I’ve had a chance to shower and feed. Or maybe feed and shower. I need blood badly. Between the stress of the night and the stab wound, I’m thirsty. I drain two pouches of blood, not even bothering with a glass. Etiquette is the last thing I need to be worried about right now.
Every inch of me is caked with blood and dirt. To top it off, I smell like death. The cloying stench emanates from me. I doubt any of my clothes are salvageable. I peel them off and throw everything in the trash bin. I quickly assess my shoulder and find that it’s fully healed. Other than the layer of dried blood there’s no evidence of my previous wounds. I climb into the shower and let the scorching hot water pour over my head. I wash my hair twice and scrub my body until the water runs clear down the drain. If only my soul were so pristine, I think, shutting off the water. I towel dry my hair and avoid looking in the mirror.
Once I’ve dressed in my favorite sweats, I climb into bed. I’ll call Aldo after I’ve had a chance to rest. My head will be much clearer then. As is my habit, I’m stalling. I tell myself that I have the right after everything that’s happened in the last twenty-four hours. Exhaustion sets in as soon as my head hits the pillow, and I easily drift off to sleep.
**********
I’m aware of a presence in the room even before I open my eyes. I slide my hand under the pillow and grab Nik’s ruby encrusted dagger. Will this nightmare never end?
“Katia? Are you awake?”
“Aldo?” I release the knife and roll over. Aldo is sitting at my desk. From the looks of it, he’s been there a while.
“I didn’t mean to startle you,” he apologizes. “I let you sleep as long as I could. I’ve already spoken to the others.”
I sit up and throw the covers back, trying to clear the cobwebs of sleep from my brain.
“What are you doing here?” I glance at the clock. It’s late afternoon. I slept most of the day.
“I was worried about you after our talk yesterday. I knew you weren’t going to stay put. When I couldn’t get you or Anya on the phone last night, I had Viktor charter a plane.”
He says this as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. Who can’t charter a private international flight at a moment’s notice? I smile and pull my knees up to my chest as I wrap my arms around them. It makes a good chin rest. For the first time I notice Viktor’s presence. He stands stoically in the corner of the room hands clasped together. I know from experience that he could spring to action at a seconds notice. His relaxed demeanor is surprisingly deceptive.
“Hello, Viktor.”
“Katia.” He’s a man of few words. It’s one of the things I like about him. He hasn’t changed a bit since I last saw him. He’s a hulk of a man, standing 6’4. His head is shaved, and the only telltale sign of his natural hair color comes from his goatee, which is brown like his eyes. More often than not, Viktor’s eyes are hidden behind dark sunglasses. Today is no exception. He always wears a black suit with a black shirt and shoes. I’ve never seen him wear anything with color. Everything about him says he means business. I feel safer just having him here.
Aldo clears his throat, and my attention returns immediately to him.
“I owe you an apology, Katia. It was arrogant of me to assume that I could protect you from the harsh realities of this world. I knew from the time Viktor and I found you that your sire might come looking for you some day. When the dreams started, I should have told you what I suspected.” He pauses, shaking his head. “Instead, I tried to control the situation by having Anya keep an eye on you. I just wanted to protect you. You had been through so much already.”
“I know you did what you thought was right Aldo, but I’m not a child. I don’t need to be protected from everything that goes bump in the night,” I tell him lovingly. “You have to let me stand on my own two feet. I’m stronger now. I deserve the truth, and I deserve the right to choose for myself.”
“You killed him?” he asks. His tone is emotionless and I wonder how my answer will be received, if it will please him.
“Yes, with Nik’s help.” I can’t take all of the credit. I might not have lived through the night on my own.
“Despite the Nexus you were able to maintain your free will and overpower him?” he asks, now clearly intrigued. He moves to the edge of his seat anticipating my reply.
“It wasn’t easy. To be honest, I wasn’t sure I could do it at first.” I wrap myself in the comforter that lies at the foot of the bed. It’s not really for warmth. It’s for security. “But, I couldn’t let him kill Nik,” I say fiercely. “I couldn’t let him kill anyone else. I did what had to be done.”
He looks out the window, seemingly contemplating his next words.
“Do you remember the night that Viktor and I came for you in that tenement?”
“How could I forget? I’d just drained a drug dealer. But he was a child. He couldn’t have been any older than sixteen or seventeen.”
“We came to kill you.”
His words are a revelation to me. I had never considered that Aldo had come for me with the intent to kill. He never presented himself to me as a threat. Not even then.
“I was in New York for a Council meeting, and there was talk of a murder spree in the city. We all suspected it was the work of a mixed-blood.” He leans back in his chair and crosses his legs. “They were going to send a local Linkuri team, but I volunteered Viktor instead.” He pauses. “I will never know what compelled me to do it. I just knew that I had to go, that it had to be us. I hadn’t been on a mission like that in ages,” he tells me shaking his head.
I’m speechless. I guess I hadn’t thought about what kind of irregularity it would have taken to get Aldo on the hunt again. To say it was beneath his position would be a gross understatement.
“When I saw you crouching over that child, remorse evident in your face, repulsed by your actions and longing for death, I knew that you could be saved. I had great faith in you, and that is why I brought you to my home in Romania. You, too, were a child in need of help.” He looks at me guiltily, and I wonder what’s coming next. “I did something then with the best of intentions that I never disclosed to you.”
I look from Aldo to Viktor and back. Their faces reveal nothing. The suspense is killing me! Aldo has never been so forthcoming with me before. Usually our conversations are fraught with obscurity and cryptic messages. We’ve never talked much about the things that happened before I came to live with him, before he adopted me into his family.
“I began feeding you with my own blood. I stored it and diluted it with small amounts of animal blood so that you wouldn’t know. I only wanted to offer you control. I wanted to give you the ability to tame the thirst that comes with age. But with that control came speed, strength, and wisdom.”
I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Aldo’s blood runs through my veins? He is one of the oldest living elders. The power of his blood is virtually unmatched. There are those who would trade their soul for a vial of it. I wonder if it was the presence of his blood that allowed me to neutralize the Vampiric Nexus with Luka. I have no doubt that, although I’d already been transfigured, the effect of his blood passing through my body would have sparked additional changes, not the least of which wo
uld be increased mental and physical strength.
“I don’t understand. Why?” I’m totally confused at this point. Feeding on Aldo’s blood is completely out of the realm of things that are likely to happen. We are way past the impossibility of dying a human and waking up a vampire now.
“I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to doubt your own morality or control. Your initial transgressions do not define you, Katia. You will be so much more than that, if only you would let go of the past and embrace your future.”
He sees me in a way that no one else does. I have no idea what gives him such confidence in me, but I’m touched by it. Still, my mind is reeling with the enormity of this news. What kind of untapped power am I sitting on? If what Aldo says is true, then it may only be my conscious mind that is holding me back. And what of the risk? It’s dangerous enough that he’s passing me off as his heir. But, if anyone knew that he’d fed me with his own blood? I can’t even think of the repercussions.
“Aldo, you take too many risks for me.” I watch as he toys with the bloodstone ring. Anastasia. “I can’t replace her, Aldo.” His body goes rigid. I’ve struck a chord.
“I never expected you to.” His face is sad. I’ve hurt him. I throw back the blankets and climb from the bed. I go to Aldo’s side and kneel by his chair. Wanting to make things right, I kiss his hand gently to show gratitude for his continued grace.
“Tell me about her.” We’ve never discussed Anastasia. Although I pretend to be born of her bloodline, even I don’t know the real story about what happened to her. Lissette warned me long ago that the subject was off limits. But today is a day of revelations, so I decide to push my luck.
“Anastasia.” He says her name reverently and closes his eyes. They remain closed as her story unfolds. “She was always strong willed as a child. As a young woman she was no different. She was like you in that way.” He opens his eyes then and looks out the window. “Things were very different then. Women did not enjoy such equality, nor did vampires who were de sange amestecat. The Consiliul de Batrani was less forgiving, and punishments from the Linkuri were swift and bloody. Our father was a ruthless man. He ruled by fear. Anastasia was one of the few people that ever crossed him and lived.” He smiles sadly and I am anxious to know the rest of the story.