Stunned, Karra had no idea what to say. Even her rehearsed story vanished in the face of Suzin’s fury. Of all the people she knew, Su was the one person she still respected, and her opinion mattered. I tried to get here to warn you, but it was too late. Security aircars already patrolled this neighborhood. I wanted to ask if you would still be willing to take care of Chalatta for me while I worked this out. But I waited until now, hoping you’d be more willing to listen. It’s just that I can’t think of a safer place for Chalatta right now… A hundred other words came to her mind, all sounding inadequate when confronted with Suzin’s outrage. I really am sorry they hurt you.
“Well?”
Karra opened her mouth to repeat the story she had practiced on Peeti, but the lie refused to come. “I should go,” she murmured instead.
Unexpectedly, her sister touched her arm, her eyes searching for something. “I didn’t know how to reach you. Maybe through Chalatta, but I really wanted to ask you in person, and it’s fortunate you showed up on this particular day.”
“Ask me what?”
“Carlon’s getting married. He’s bringing his intended here to meet the family. I’ve planned a dinner for everyone, including you, if you’d like to stay.”
Karra had forgotten that the invitation came from Jem and not Su. “Did you invite Jem too?”
“You’re the only one who knows how to reach him,” Suzin reminded her.
Then how had he known about the party?
“I guess I could stay.” She knew the invitation came from her sister and not Carlon. Never Carlon. “Are you sure you want me here?”
Su’s face showed a curious mixture of disapproval and longing, as if she couldn’t decide how she really felt. “Just today, this one party. You do know that you can’t come back here, don’t you? And you also know you can’t take your daughter with you? You can’t put her in that kind of danger.”
She knew. For the last nine days she had been arguing with herself about that very subject. Every time Chalatta visited, and it had been daily, she hoped to find a way to take her daughter with her. Take her where? On shoplifting excursions? Or to a bar to attract a Drake, and then hide her under the bed of the room they rented? What kind of life would that be for a little girl?
“Actually that was why I came here in the first place.” It wasn’t. “I was hoping you wouldn’t mind caring for Chalatta until I sorted all of this out.” Maybe forever. Her chest ached.
Suzin beamed. “I wouldn’t mind at all, hon, not at all. You are staying for the dinner, aren’t you?”
Karra forced a grin. “Would I miss a free meal?”
The front door flew open and Suzin smiled as three children burst inside. Nothing ever kept the younger ones quiet. Kata and Benej, thirteen and eleven respectively, had matured from squalling toddlers to boisterous youngsters. They usually greeted their oldest sister with generous hugs, but today their attention flew to Karra. Su felt a momentary pang of jealousy.
"Karra's home!" Benej and Kata shouted in unison. In the midst of it was a teary "Mama!" from Chalatta.
"Read me a story! Read me a story!" Chalatta demanded.
Karra laughed, a low, throaty sound like a purr. Chalatta seemed to be the only one able to make it happen. Su found her gaze drifting toward her sister to see the rare expression of affection on Karra's face.
Chalatta ran to the girls’ room to get a book. The story was about a peasant girl in love with a prince. Suzin remembered that the beautifully illustrated book had also been one of Karra’s favorites. Although illegal, either the Security failed to notice it or had ignored it during their recent intrusion. Food might have been scarce while they were growing up, Su remembered, but reading material never was. Chalatta handed the book to her mother in expectation.
Just as Su started toward the kitchen to finish washing the dishes, she heard Chalatta's low whisper.
"Mama, why can't you stay home all the time like you used to?"
Su froze to listen.
"I never stayed here all the time," Karra reminded her.
"But you were gone too long this time. Are you gonna stay away now like Uncle Jem does?"
"We've already talked about this, baby," Karra whispered.
Su could not help but to turn back in surprise. When had they talked? Was that why Chalatta disappeared for a few hours every day? Where did they meet?
Wearing a pout, Chalatta stared directly at Su who paused before escaping into the kitchen. "I belong with you, Mama, not Aunt Su.” She turned back toward her mother and nestled into her shoulder. “You need to take me with you."
Su fled to the safety of her kitchen, not hearing Karra's response. She fought angry tears. Oh, it was true Karra brought in the necessary wens, often enough to buy things for the rest of them as well, but it was the aunt, not the mother who saw the child through scraped knees, runny noses and tears. She felt betrayed. She did not hear Karra’s refusal.
"With me where?" Karra asked. "I don't even know who I'll be with. Sometimes I need to run very fast from the Security. I have no money and no food. It's hard enough just taking care of myself. I don't think I could take care of you right now. You need to stay with Aunt Su."
Chalatta's fingers traced a picture in the book. "Aunt Su says you're on the run. Is that what 'on the run' means?"
"Yes."
"This is all because of that Other!" she cried. "I hate them! And I don't want to be with Aunt Su! I belong with you!"
Karra held her as close as she could and rocked her as she had when Chalatta had been an infant. She relished the feeling. Too often Su had been too busy with their youngest siblings to hold the baby. But Karra looked forward to each moment she had been able to give her child, hoping for a time when she no longer needed to work so hard and so long to give her financial support. And just when she was almost there…
"We've been through this already," she told her through a suddenly fogged voice. "Come on, Chalatta. You can be a brave girl. If I can be brave, so can you. Are you ready for another story?"
A half an hour later, Dugaan and Saril arrived home, surprised looks on their faces when they saw their older sister who was now in an animated discussion with Benej about his new school project, some kind of unidentifiable art piece made of paper, glue and colored sand. Actually, Benej produced most of the animation. Karra nodded at his explanation, but her attention kept drifting to Kata who paraded around both of them in a party dress. Chalatta sat on her other side, happily reading aloud, unaware that she was no longer the center of attention.
"That's my dress!" Saril exploded.
"My fault," Karra told her with a casual grin. "That's fine, Kata. Change into your street clothes before we both get yelled at."
Kata stomped off with a sigh of frustration.
"Don't blame anyone but me," Karra said. "I saw it in the closet and asked her to model it for me. But I can see right now you'll fill it out much better."
At the compliment, Saril beamed. "Do you think so? I've been invited to a party. Will it make me look terrific?"
"Terrific?" Karra shrugged. "You're lovely. The dress is lovely. It's a color you wear well. Why wouldn't you look terrific? Why is this so important?"
Saril gave the room a furtive glance. "Privately," she insisted. "In the girls' room."
Benej, aware that he had lost his audience, glared at both older sisters.
"Why not?" Karra gave him an apologetic shrug and her daughter an affectionate pat. "Back in a minute," she promised both of them.
Saril shut the door behind them, throwing a withering glare at Kata who exited with an insolent toss of her long, dark hair. "Sometimes she's such a child!" Saril muttered. "But you understand how important a party like this would be for a woman. After all, you've known lots of men…" Her voice trailed away as Karra sat on the bed across from the shared with Kata. All at once, Saril turned on Karra, an accusatory fire in her eyes. "What if this is our last intimate discussion? Why did you let it happen?" sh
e blurted out instead of whatever she had planned to say. "I need you. Su doesn't understand like you do."
Taken aback, Karra had no idea how to respond for a moment. "Understand what?" she asked finally, stupidly.
"About men, of course. You know all about them, with your yellow certificate and all, don't you? But Su's still a virgin!"
Surprised, she could only stare. Although no more than two years older, Karra felt ancient next to Saril. Maybe Carlon was right after all the last time they had spoken, when he had accused her of being cold and hard and ugly, no more useful than trash.
"Su understands more than you think," she said at last. "Has it ever occurred to you I might be proud of her?" Who else could raise Chalatta the way I want, she wanted to add.
"But you know more about men, made love and all, right?"
"Love? When I use my yellow certificate, it has nothing to do with love."
"You've never been in love?" Saril was incredulous.
"No." Only once.
"But you've made love. You oughta know something."
"Saril, I've used sex. I haven't made love. I can give a man the kind of sex he wants, but love?" Remembering her first love, she gave a bitter laugh.
"Is it wrong what you do?"
"It's legal."
"See? Su says it's wrong to make love before you're married. She'll die an old maid."
"You know the rules. With an illegal pregnancy, they'll force you to go to Sann's for sterilization. It’s not reversible, Saril. They remove your womb. What you may not know is the pressure they'll put on you to take the yellow certificate option."
"Is that so bad? You have both."
"Saril, do you want to get married?"
"Sure."
"Then listen to Su. No man marries someone like me."
"Did you ever want to get married, Karra?"
"No." Only once.
"I see." But her face said something else. "Well, erren’t that just great? I want to do some girl talk about a party I’ve been invited to, and ask questions about what to expect. And I can’t talk to Su because she’s so…so…well, ruler straight, y’know? But I can’t talk to you either, because you erren’t gonna be here. And, hang it all, Karra, why’d you go and fix yourself so you can’t be here anymore?”
“I…What is it that you want from me, Saril? I’ve done everything wrong. Why would you want to ask me about anything?”
“Is that what you think? Why wouldn’t I want to talk to you? You’re a real person, and you’ve been out in the real world. Su knows nothing. She’s...she’s so single file she makes me sick. But…”
“What do you want me to tell you, that it’s all right to live on the edge of life? Well, it isn’t. Listen to Su. Whatever you want to talk about, she’s got the wisdom you need.”
“Yeah? Well, Chalatta’s not the only one who misses you. Did you ever think about that?”
“No,” she said. It had never occurred to her that anyone else in the family felt that way about her. Saril sounded as if she felt betrayed, or maybe abandoned. How was that possible? Only Chalatta cared whether or not she came here, didn’t she?
“Could you leave me alone to think a little?" Saril seemed very close to tears.
Karra left, but she knew that somehow she had failed her younger sister.
Chapter 10
Carlon arrived at Chi’ara's apartment and knocked lightly on her door. Much to his annoyance, he found himself biting his nails. Impatiently he shoved his hands into his pockets. “What-ifs” plagued him.
What if Chalatta started asking too many questions or volunteered too much information?
What if Chi'ara's wealth and refinement upsets any of his family?
And the worst: What if Jem or Karra arrived?
Just the thought of Jem and Karra at Su’s dinner clenched his stomach. He should never have mentioned Su’s invitation to her, then told Su his intended had refused. Lies, however, lies never came easily when he spoke to Su.
Worse, the fact that Chi’ara nearly jumped at the idea in her enthusiasm, nagged at him.
He wished tonight were already over.
Biting his lip instead of his nails, Carlon knocked again.
"Come in," she said while opening it. Her warm smile reassured him. "I'll just be a minute. Lela, please seat him."
She left him alone with her maid, to finish some undefined thing. His doubts lurked in the room like shadows. Both Karra and Jem would hate Chi’ara for the very reasons he loved her. In his mind, he still saw her velvety, pale blue-gray face framed by her silky blue-black hair. But he especially loved her large eyes, pupils of the deepest black surrounded by solid blue-black irises surrounded by blue-gray, so exotic without the white.
The moment she returned, he knew it would be a mistake to take her to his home, even if Jem or Karra never arrived. Even if her skin had been the shades of brown, cream, or pink of a Homelander, she would be a flower in a refuse mound. Her clothing set her apart. Besides the B’anu silk fabric, the gown covered her neck to wrist to ankle, proper for a Nevian lady of breeding.
But costume was only one problem facing their cultures. In all probability, she would be called Mirra, a title of respect in the Area. But Nevians considered Master and Mistress the only appropriate titles.
"Do you like what I'm wearing?" she asked, noticing his eyes on her.
"Yes." He loved it. No one else would. "But are you sure you want to do this? It's not the same as when I met your family for the first time."
"Of course it is. Besides, your family must be exceptional. I heard many stories of those who live in the Outer Area. You fit none of them. Aside from the fact that you speak our language, my father promoted you for very good reasons. How could a man like you be from the Area without an extremely supportive family? They must be very different from the tales I've heard."
"They are different," he muttered.
"Mistress," Lela said, her trembling voice barely above a whisper. "Perhaps you should listen to Master Carlon."
"What is your problem?" Chi’ara’s impatience showed.
"I must speak plainly, Mistress. It is the Outer Area. Is it wise for a woman of your social status to be seen there? But even more, does not the danger frighten you?”
Carlon glanced at the Nevian maid, surprised that she spoke so openly. To date, he had heard her utter no more than a handful of words.
"I think you're afraid."
"Yes, Mistress! Aren't you?"
"But we have my brave Carlon to protect us."
Carlon ignored her smile of confidence. Obviously she did not know the Area.
"Lela has a point," he said, hoping she would reconsider. "Instead of going into the Area, let's take my family to a restaurant someplace in the Inner City. That would be a real treat for them, and you could still meet everyone."
"How absolutely awful! And after you told me what a marvelous cook your sister Suzin is. I'm sure she has everything already prepared. Why, not to go would be an insult."
Perhaps, but offending Su was safer than the trouble Jem or Karra might cause when they saw his intended was an Other.
"Since it is Lela who is afraid," Chi’ara continued, “we could leave her here. I am certain you will see to my safety."
"But, Mistress!" Lela protested. "Not chaperoned! It is forbidden!"
"I cannot allow it," Carlon said as he helped Chi’ara with her cape, pretending not to notice her eyes glittering in triumph. He had seen this willful side of her many times.
He draped Lela’s cape around the maid's shoulders as though she also were a fine lady. "Lela, I must insist you accompany us."
"Yes, Master Carlon." They would go into the Area no matter who cautioned them.
Her head held high in victory, Chi’ara marched out the door, pausing only to make sure Carlon had secured the lock.
"Did you say your whole family would be there tonight? Would that include Karra and Jem?" she asked as they reached the elevator.
&n
bsp; He jabbed the button with far more force than necessary.
"No. I said Suzin wanted to make sure they were invited. Usually Karra stays away only a day or two, but she hasn’t been home since the murder. Furthermore, we haven't seen Jem in several years." Nearly the truth, Carlon thought as he recalled the few short visits over the years.
The elevator door blinked just before it dilated. No one spoke as they stepped onto the platform. Maintaining his silence, Carlon jabbed the button written in Nevian: LOWER ENTRANCE HALL. He wondered if Chi’ara thought his anger might be directed at her, and this time didn’t really care. Ever since the murder there had been nothing but questions, as though he could do something about Karra's behavior. The elevator floated noiselessly toward the first floor.
“What would you think if both of them arrived?”
That was exactly what he feared the most. If there were ways to complicate his life, those two knew how better than anyone. Because he bore the name Willo, most doors automatically shut. Chi’ara’s father had been the only one willing to allow him to prove that he could sell as well as anyone on the sales team. Of course the fact that he also read, spoke, and wrote in fluent Nevian helped. His ease with their conqueror’s language was the only advantage Karra’s childhood teacher had given him, although he did find it odd that Karra no longer remembered either the language or her teacher.
Regardless, it took him years to gain the trust he now enjoyed.
Or did before the murder. And now here was Chi’ara asking him the same questions as everyone else.
"I'm probably far too concerned." She lifted one shoulder slightly.
Carlon said nothing. Chi’ara would never understand his family. Too often, neither did he.
The elevator came to a stop and the door dilated open. Each move is bringing us closer, he thought with dread. Five minutes through the airway tubes, then the two-larga walk home. One hour. He wished the elevator had stalled, except the Nevian system rarely malfunctioned.
Her Darkest Beauty: An Alien Invasion Series - The Second Generation Page 9