“Devon—” he began, searching for some way to reassure her while still maintaining the distance he felt was necessary for his own good “—you haven’t done anything.”
Frustration clawed at her. Devon felt as if she was going around in circles. “Then why won’t you talk to me anymore?” she asked.
This was hard for her because she was all but baring her soul to him and it wasn’t getting her anywhere. But Devon knew that she wasn’t going to have any peace until she found some way to resolve this.
Her eyes met his. She played her ace card. “I miss you, Cody,” she told him.
That look on her face was going to be his undoing, he thought.
“Oh damn, you’re making this really hard, Devon.”
She raised her eyes to his. “Making what hard?” she asked.
He debated saying it, but she left him no choice. So he did.
“Staying away from you,” he told her simply.
“Then don’t,” she entreated.
With his last fiber of resolve, Cody struggled to hold himself in check.
“I don’t want you to feel that you’re obligated to me in any way.” He could see by the look on her face that she didn’t understand what he was trying to tell her. He let out a ragged sigh, trying again. “I don’t want you thinking that I helped you in order to help myself to you.”
And then she understood.
Idiot, she thought.
“Did it ever occur to you that maybe, just maybe, I’d want you to?” she asked him in a low voice that seemed to undulate throughout his entire being.
He didn’t believe that for a second. He couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d be taking advantage of her. “Your emotions are all in an uproar and you’re confused, Devon,” he told her.
“Don’t tell me how I feel,” she said, raising her voice. “I know how I feel and I’m only confused because you did such a U-turn on me. Now, if I did nothing to offend you, why won’t you talk to me?” she asked. “Why don’t you hang out with Layla and me the way you did before?”
Once he said this, he didn’t know how to unsay it. But she left him no choice. There was nothing else that he could do.
“Because I want you,” he said simply.
Cody expected her to look upset or at the very least, retreat from him. Quickly. He did not expect her to say, “Thank God.”
Cody blinked, certain he hadn’t heard her correctly. “What?”
“I said, ‘Thank God,’” Devon repeated, her eyes on his.
He’d heard her the first time. That wasn’t what he was asking her. “I heard you,” he told her. “But—”
The rest of his words died in his throat as Devon put her arms around his neck, bringing her body up against his.
“Enough talking,” she said.
And then, before Cody could say anything further, she pressed her lips against his, initiating a kiss that seemed to go on forever, growing deeper and more passionate with each second that went by.
A moment later, all his good intentions seemed to dissolve. Cody wrapped his arms around her, the feeling of her body against his warming his very soul. Desire suddenly spiked up so high within him that it all but swallowed him whole.
At the very last second, before he felt himself going down for the third and final time, Cody managed to draw his face back from hers, terminating contact even as his body pleaded for him to continue.
“You don’t want to do this,” he told her.
Devon’s soul-melting smile began in her eyes, which crinkled as she informed him, “See, you don’t know everything.”
“But we can’t,” he protested. “You just had a baby.” He knew nothing about the way a woman’s body worked at a time like this, but he was attempting to be cautious for her sake.
“Everything’s back in working order. Trust me,” she whispered seductively. “I know my own body.”
It had been more than six weeks since she’d given birth and prior to that, there had been several months of complete abstinence, not because she hadn’t wanted the intimacy, but because Jack didn’t. He had come up with one excuse after another to keep her at arm’s length. He hadn’t so much as kissed her in the last two.
The longing she felt right now was overwhelming.
Cody wanted to resist, to be noble for her sake. But good intentions only went so far and all of his disintegrated in the face of the passion that had come to the surface.
His lips locked with hers, Cody carried Devon over to his bed, gently laying her down as if she was the most precious of packages. A fire had been lit within him, a fire that wasn’t going to be easily sated, not until they’d made love.
Maybe not even then.
But again, guilt raised its head and he struggled to put an inch of space between them, giving Devon one last chance to change her mind and come to her senses. He couldn’t do any more than that.
“You’re sure?” he asked breathlessly.
His question only made her want Cody more. No one had ever cared about her feelings, about how she felt, certainly not to this extent.
“I’m sure,” she murmured. “If it’ll make you feel better, I’ll sign an affidavit later,” she breathed against his lips. “Now make love to me before I go up in smoke entirely.”
She felt his lips curve against hers as he smiled. “Can’t have that happening,” he told her.
Finally!
She kissed him back with a fresh wave of passion that all but submerged them both, a giant tsunami of unleashed desire that only kept building, heightening, making her feel almost frantic as she twisted and turned beneath his large, capable hands.
Cody stroked her—over and over again he stroked her—bringing her up higher with every pass of his hand, every wild beat of her heart.
It took a huge effort to hold herself in check, to keep from reaching the final climax on her own.
But she wanted more than that, more than just gratification.
She wanted Cody to feel what she was feeling. Wanted him to experience what she was experiencing. Whatever was going to happen, she wanted it to happen to both of them together because she had no idea what tomorrow might usher in.
She needed this memory to cling to if everything that was transpiring tonight suddenly went away.
Shifting, moving her body along his, Devon reached for him, her fingers deftly caressing his muscular back, slipping along his hard biceps and then, with swift, eager strokes, she brought her hands gliding along his hard thighs. Hearing him moan excited her, bringing her up to an even higher plateau.
She moved ever lower until she managed to come to the very essence of him.
As her hands worked their magic, she could feel Cody responding, could feel his body hardening. Pulsating.
He wanted her and it was time.
Devon parted her legs and arched her back, the invitation unspoken but clear.
Just before his next move, she opened her eyes. She saw that Cody was looking back at her. Their eyes locked even as their bodies forged a union.
His hips moved, thrusting and she mimicked the movement, eager to ride out the wave with him. Eager to feel that final, wild, ecstatic thrill that would have her gasping as it stole her breath away.
She held on to him as hard as she could, absorbing the thrill. Something stirred within her that, until this very second, she hadn’t realized had been missing all those other times before, when she’d made love with Jack.
The emotion burst open within her chest like a hungry spring flower searching for the light. It took everything she had not to say the words aloud.
Because she instantly knew what she was feeling, even if she had never felt it before.
Because nothing but love could feel this way.
It took g
reat effort not to shout “I love you” even as the sensation filled her. She knew that she would continue to feel that way long after tonight was just a mere memory.
Happiness mingled with sadness. Because she was in love and because she had no idea what he felt.
Chapter Sixteen
Euphoria’s hold on him tiptoed away slowly, slipping back into the shadows where it had come from.
Cody held fast for as long as he could. He didn’t want to let the moment go, didn’t want to allow the outside world and reality to come barging in, taking its place.
All he wanted to do was hold on to this feeling.
Hold on to her.
He lost track of time. Maybe he dozed off, maybe he didn’t. But he kept his arm tucked around Devon, comforted by the sound of her even breathing.
Had she fallen asleep, or...?
And then he heard it, heard the tiny cry that swiftly heralded in the outside world like nothing else could.
Devon raised her head from his chest, cocking her ear and listening. He felt her breath rippling along his chest as she sighed.
Devon glanced in his direction. “I’d better get her before she wakes up everyone else.”
“Stay,” he told her, gently moving her aside so that he could slip out of his bed and look in on Layla. “I’ll go see what she wants.”
She felt extremely confused by everything that had transpired tonight, even as her heart quickened just to look at him. But she didn’t want him feeling that he needed to help her. The baby was her responsibility.
“But—”
Cody was already shrugging into his jeans. Standing up, he leaned over and kissed the top of her head.
“Just this once, Devon, don’t argue,” he requested. “I’ve got this. You get your sleep.”
With that, he padded out of the room barefoot and into the baby’s new room.
His path was illuminated by the light from the new lamp Devon had gotten at the baby shower. A shy pink lamb was gamboling across the lamp shade. Cody crossed to the crib.
“So what’ll it be, Princess?” he asked as he lifted the fussing baby into his arms. Taking a deep whiff of her diaper, he ruled out one reason for the middle-of-the-night summons. “Well, you don’t need changing,” he concluded. “That leaves hungry or bored.”
One look at her small, intent face answered his question for him. “Hungry, it is. What say you and I go downstairs and raid the refrigerator? How does that sound?”
Layla’s face was pressed against his chest and he could feel her little lips rooting around.
Tickled, Cody laughed softly. “I guess that answers that.”
Holding Layla close to him, Cody made his way down the stairs and into the kitchen. Although for the most part, Devon was still breastfeeding Layla, she had prepared several small bottles of formula to be used just in case.
“What do you say we let Mommy get her beauty rest—not that she needs it,” he went on. “You grow up to be half as pretty as your mama, I’m going to have to make sure that all those young bucks out there know that they’ll have me to reckon with if they so much as step one inch over the line.”
The bottle warmer Devon had received as another gift at the shower was set up on the counter. Cody took out a bottle from the refrigerator and placed it in the warmer. It did its job quickly. He smiled to himself as the timer went off.
“That’s a hell—I mean heck—of a lot more efficient than just putting it into a pot of boiling water.” Even so, he tested the bottle’s contents to make sure it hadn’t gotten too warm. “Perfect,” he murmured. “Okay, let’s get you back upstairs.”
Cradling Layla against him with one arm, Cody held the bottle with the other and slowly made his way up the stairs back to Layla’s room. Cody wasn’t accustomed to moving so slowly, but he wasn’t about to take a chance on jostling the infant.
When he got to her room, he crossed over to the rocking chair by the window. He sat down.
After positioning the infant, he began to feed her and gently rock at the same time. He hoped the combination of warm milk and rhythmic motion would help Layla fall asleep again.
And after a while, it did.
Despite the hour, Cody sat for a few minutes just looking at her. No doubt about it. Layla held his heart captive in that tiny fist of hers just as much as her mother did.
Ever so slowly, he removed the bottle’s nipple from the rosebud lips that had been so intently clamped around it.
He set the bottle aside but continued sitting there for a moment longer, just watching Layla sleep.
* * *
FEELING GUILTY, DEVON had gotten out of bed to look in on her daughter and to see if Cody needed help.
What she saw warmed her heart to such an extent she could feel tears gathering in her eyes. If she hadn’t already admitted to herself that she was in love with Cody, she would have fallen in love with the man right at this moment.
For however long this lasted, Devon promised herself, she was going to enjoy it and be grateful that their paths, hers and Cody’s, had crossed just when she’d needed him. But being with Jack had taught her that nothing lasted forever, so she intended to savor this while she could.
Suppressing a sigh, Devon tiptoed back away from the room.
* * *
WHEN HE FINALLY put Layla down and then went back to his own room, Cody found that his bed was empty. Devon had obviously returned to her room.
For a second, he thought of going to her. Not to make love again but just to slip into her bed. He liked the comforting sensation of having her next to him, of holding her. But he had no idea how Devon might react to his presence there. She might think that he wanted to make love again—he did, but that wasn’t the main reason he wanted her beside him.
She needed her sleep, he told himself, surrendering the notion. He resigned himself to sleeping alone.
His bed felt cold and empty as he slipped into it.
* * *
“ARE YOU UP to meeting someone?” Cody asked Devon suddenly as he walked into the kitchen. He made no effort to hide his excitement. Less than a week had gone by since the parameters of their relationship had shifted.
He’d initially thought about pretending that nothing had happened, but that was a lie. Something had happened. And over the course of the next few days, it kept on happening by very mutual consent.
“Who?” she asked as she turned from the stove for a moment.
Whatever she was making smelled really good, he thought absently. As did she, he added as a silent afterthought. Just looking at her stirred him and made him think of things that had nothing to do with cooking.
He paused for a moment to choose his words, but then gave up and just let them come tumbling out. She’d get the gist of this soon enough.
“Her name’s Julia Shaw and she’s the principal of Forever’s only elementary school. She’s an old friend,” he qualified. “And she’d like to meet you whenever it’s convenient.”
Devon stopped stirring the beef stew she was making and looked at Cody. She wasn’t following him. “Why would she want to meet me, Cody?” she asked. “Just what’s this all about?”
“Well, you mentioned that you’d been a substitute teacher in New Mexico and that you were thinking of getting back to teaching someday. I happen to know that one of the teachers at the elementary school is leaving Forever, so I checked it out. I found out that there’ll be an opening for a fifth-grade teacher in the fall. Now, I know you said that your goal is to teach at a junior college, but I figure maybe some baby steps might be in order.”
Devon was stunned to say the least and very close to speechless as she looked at him. When she finally found her tongue, she had to ask. “How did you manage this?”
The corners of his mouth curved
into a grin that could be called nothing short of sexy.
“There are some advantages to living in a small town,” he told her. “For one thing, everybody knows everybody—or knows someone who knows the someone you want to meet.” Cody realized that he was getting lost in his explanation and so he simplified it. “Bottom line is that Julia would like to meet you and talk to you about your experience.”
“Well, I have teaching credentials,” she said. “But I actually didn’t teach for that long.”
“Then that shouldn’t be a problem,” Cody concluded. He knew for a fact that Julia was actively searching for a teacher to plug up the unexpected hole in her staff. And then it occurred to him that Devon looked less than excited about this prospect. Had he misunderstood something? “I mean, if you still want to be a teacher.”
“Oh, I do,” she assured him quickly. And then she sighed. Nothing was black-and-white anymore. “But things have gotten a little complicated the last few weeks. I mean, I’d need to find someone to watch Layla for me while I was teaching every day, so—”
“We’ll come up with something,” he promised her. “That’s not a problem.” He handed her a folded piece of paper. On it was Julia’s private number. “Why don’t you talk to Julia and make an appointment to meet with her?” he suggested.
Devon opened the paper and stared at it for a moment. “Really?” she asked, unable to believe that it was going to be this easy. Almost too easy, she couldn’t help thinking.
He smiled as he went to pick up Layla out of her portable playpen.
“Really,” he assured her before he looked at the infant and cooed, “Hi, Princess. Miss me?”
Devon pressed her lips together as she watched Cody with her daughter. Temporary, it’s just temporary, she reminded herself. Don’t get used to it.
But it was hard not to.
* * *
ALL TWELVE GRADES of Forever’s school system could essentially be found within the confines of one building. The first eight grades were located in the larger wing of the building while the last four were in the other, far smaller wing.
COWBOY AND THE BABY, THE Page 15