by Sable, R. J.
The rest of the family seemed to have picked up on the fact that Ian was talking and zoned in on the kitchen island.
“Any news, E?” Matt asked, resting his hand on my shoulder.
“We got the third guy,” he shrugged. He didn’t look pleased and that struck me as odd. Surely he should be happy that none of the men who had kidnapped me can do so again?
“Oh?” Elise prompted hopefully.
“Dead,” Ian shook his head dismissively. “Car crash early this morning.”
“Seems like a bit of a coincidence,” Matt frowned.
“Exactly,” Ian nodded. “Got a DNA match to evidence left in the van and at the warehouse, so it’s definitely the same guy. A task force from MI5 have been assigned to the case.”
“MI5?” Jason frowned. “I thought they dealt with domestic terrorist threats?”
Ian shot Jason a look that would have had me shutting up but Jason either hadn’t learnt Ian’s meaningful glares or simply didn’t give a crap because he continued.
“What the hell has that got to do with an abduction?”
“Maybe nothing,” Ian glowered. “Better safe than sorry.”
I could tell Jason wasn’t satisfied with Ian’s answer and had a million more questions but I squeezed his hand gently and relied on his psychic abilities to tell him that he shouldn’t push for more. It must have been hard for Ian, maybe more for him than any of the rest of us, because he felt responsible and couldn’t do anything about it. I was sure that he would tell us as much as he was able and I didn’t want him to get pissed off with us for asking too many questions.
“From what we can tell, the three of them were just hired hands. All of them had a history,” Ian sighed.
“But they’re all dead now, right?” Jake prompted.
“Which is no use to us,” Ian frowned. “Just because they’re dead doesn’t mean whoever did this can’t hire someone else.”
My head was starting to throb again from trying to take in all this information. I’d naively thought it was all over once I’d woken up in the hospital bed and realised I was safe. I reached for my tablets and took one but immediately wished I hadn’t because of the uncomfortable expressions my brothers wore. I shouldn’t have drawn attention to the fact that I was hurting. It made them all feel guilty.
“Any way to tell who paid them?” Karl prompted, his face locked in a stern expression.
“The payment was made from an account in Switzerland and we’re having to cut through a lot of international, bureaucratic, red tape. As far as we can tell the money came from a group in the UK with ties to a whole catalogue of illegal activity, not least of which is selling arms to terrorist organisations,” Ian grimaced.
“So it’s just a waiting game until we find out more?” Karl frowned.
“’Fraid so,” Ian nodded grimly. “There’s nothing more I can tell you for now.” He looked remorseful and I suspected he wished he could tell us something that would put us at ease. I didn’t envy the situation he was in.
The atmosphere in the kitchen grew suddenly uncomfortable. Silence washed over us in a chilling wave and I assumed everyone was deep in thought, just as I was. I glanced at Elise and it killed me to see the worry on her face. She didn’t need the stress on top of the pregnancy. If she was too stressed then she might get ill and that might not be good for her or the baby. I don’t want to think about that.
“Dinner’s ready,” I smiled and tried my best to sound cheery. “Will somebody help me lay the table?”
They all seemed relieved to have something else to think about and the silence was exchanged for bustling activity as everybody tried to help at once. Ian hopped off his chair and pressed a brisk kiss to my forehead, which I knew was his version of an apology, both for the situation and not being able to fix it. I smiled reassuringly back and set about getting the food out of the oven.
“This sucks,” I sighed to Jason as we climbed into bed together later that night.
“What sucks, baby?” He asked, scooping me up so I could lie on top of him.
“You’re all treating me differently,” I pouted. He and my brothers had been pussyfooting around me as if they were scared I would have a mental breakdown at any moment.
Jason sighed and began running his fingers through my hair. “Can you blame us, Jamie?” He whispered. “It was horrible.”
I tensed up and squeezed him tightly. It had been horrible for me too but I could still empathise with what they’d been through.
“I know it wasn’t exactly a walk in the park for you, I didn’t mean to sound like an ass,” he said quickly. “But you should have seen your brothers, Jamie. If I ever doubted how much they cared about you, then I was wrong. They were distraught. We all were.”
“I’m safe now,” I whispered, trying to reassure him. His voice sounded so pained and it killed me that he’d been put through all that because of me. “I’m scared as well, Jason,” I admitted, closing my eyes tight because I was sick of crying. “But I don’t want all this to change things. I don’t want to be looking over my shoulder every few seconds and I don’t want you to feel like you have to protect me constantly.”
“We need to be on our guard, Jamie,” he sighed, still holding me close to him. “Just for a bit, until we know more. Maybe Ian will get some more info soon.”
“Yeah… Ian,” I sighed. “I don’t understand what his job has to do all this.”
“What does he do exactly?”
“No idea,” I shook my head. “We always joked that he was like James Bond, but we were only kidding around. Now I’m not so sure.”
“I thought he was in the army,” Jason said.
“He is. The SAS. He stopped telling us about his tours of duty after a few years. He was pretty young when he was selected. Granddad was crazy proud.”
“Special Forces,” Jason nodded. “Don’t see how that could effect your family though.”
I shrugged. I didn’t either but Ian obviously suspected something and his gut instincts were usually spot on. I trusted him to handle the situation for now. I just hoped he didn’t blame himself too much. I sometimes worried Ian would explode from stress. He didn’t show it very often but he carried the world on his shoulders.
He’d been the effective head of the family for thirteen years and, in that role, he’d taken responsibility for all of us. All of our successes were his successes. Our failures were his failures. That was why he always took everything so personally. If we let ourselves down then we let him down, and worse, we let the family down. The family our parents had given us and Ian had kept together.
This sense of responsibility was, in part, the reason why he felt the need to protect us. I guess he thought he owed it to Mum and Dad to keep us all safe and well behaved. What he never realised was that we needed him as a big brother more than we needed him as a protector.
I took a deep breath and tried to push all these thoughts away. The past few days had been too much. I refused to let it affect me any more. I wanted to forget and I knew just how to do that.
“Jamie…” Jason said cautiously as I began slowly sliding down him, trailing kisses down his body.
I ignored him and continued on, pausing at his nipple to tease him with my tongue. The familiar buzz of energy charged through my lips and invigorated my every nerve ending. His heat warmed my skin as it pressed against me and ignited my senses. Jason groaned as I continued downwards, letting my nails graze his skin gently.
“Jamie…” he groaned again. “You should be resting.”
I knew he was trying to castigate me but he didn’t sound very enthusiastic and the hard length in my hand wasn’t very convincing either.
“Please, Jason,” I pleaded, looking into the depths of his blue-green eyes, which were twinkling in the moonlight shining through the bedroom window.
“Fuck,” he exhaled as I tightened my grip around him. “Dammit, Jamie. I’m really not good at saying no to you.”
He sat up
so that we were eye-to-eye and pulled me into a kiss, his hands travelled up my back, onto my neck and I winced as they brushed against the bandages on the back of my head. It was still a little sore where they’d put a few stitches in.
“Shit, sorry,” Jason winced, immediately withdrawing from me and flopping back down onto the bed.
“Jason,” I pouted. “It’s fine, honestly.”
He sighed deeply and gently grabbed my wrists as I tried to get his interest back to playtime. “We shouldn’t, Jamie.”
I frowned as he helped me off of him and rolled over onto his front, clearly denying me access. This wasn’t going to plan. I knew Jason was doing what he thought was best for me but I was not happy.
“Jason,” I pouted again. “I want you.”
“I know,” he grinned, pushing himself up off the bed slightly to look up at me. “But you need to take it easy, Jamie.”
“You don’t get to decide that for me, Jason,” I said softly. I was one hundred percent serious but I didn’t want him to take offence.
“The hell I don’t, Jamie,” he growled protectively. “You’re mine. I’ll do everything in my power to keep you safe and look after you. Even if it means I get blue balls for a while.”
“Then look after me,” I whispered brushing my fingers over his cheek gently.
“Jamie…” Jason growled again.
I could see the tortured look on his face and I knew it was taking every ounce of self-control he had to say no to me. I loved that he wanted to keep me safe but I loved that it was so hard for him to keep his hands off me even more.
“Fine,” I sulked when he rebuffed my attentions again. I wasn’t happy about it, but if he was going to deny me then I was going to have my revenge. “Suit yourself. But, Jason?”
“Yeah, Jamie?” He answered, looking a little relieved that I’d backed off.
“I want to come,” I blushed. I always blushed.
“I know,” he chuckled, pushing up to kiss me chastely on the lips. “I’ll make it up to you soon, baby, I promise.”
“No,” I shook my head petulantly.
“No?” He raised his eyebrow at me.
“No,” I repeated. “I want to come now.” I relaxed back onto the bed and pushed the cover off me. I wanted to make sure he could see what I was about to do.
“What are you doing, Jamie?” He asked huskily.
I let my actions speak for me as I slowly edged my hand down over my abdomen. I spread my legs as I reached the curls at the apex of my thighs and let my fingers trail slowly down my leg. I wasn’t sure if I was confident enough to actually go through with it and I was hoping Jason wouldn’t call my bluff.
“Jamie,” Jason prompted again, his voice a low growl of carnal promise.
“I want to come, Jason,” I repeated. “And if you won’t give me what I want, I’ll have to get it myself.” I closed my eyes as my cheeks burned. I was coming off as way more confident than I felt and I hoped Jason was buying it. He could usually read me like an open book but I was hoping his vision would be clouded by the lust that I could see dancing behind his darkened eyes.
“You’re not allowed to touch yourself, Jamie,” Jason warned, the side of his lips quirking up slightly.
I nodded. “I know. I figured either you’ll step in and save me, or you’ll have to punish me and we both know how that will end. Either way, I get what I want.”
“Jamie,” he groaned. “You’re killing me here.”
I smirked at the look of pure desire on his face. I could see he was battling hard with his conscience and I knew I’d won. He sighed as he pushed away from the bed and gave into me.
“I’ve created a monster,” he whispered as he pushed himself over me, wrapping his arms around my waist as he lowered himself into me gently.
I grinned broadly at my victory and closed my eyes to enjoy every second of our intimate minutes together. There was nothing in the celestial world that could top the feelings that overwhelmed my senses when Jason and I merged into one. I wouldn’t be denied those blissful moments for anything.
Chapter 7
Monday, 1st July 2013
I couldn’t help thinking that this was the most beautiful moment I had ever experienced. It was easy to forget all the stress and anxiety in my life over the past few weeks whilst I held the little bundle of soft cotton in my arms and cherished her every detail. The soft feel of her skin, her thick black lashes, the delicate smell of new-born life. There were no words to describe how my little niece smelt, the closest word I could think of was pink. She smelt pink. Pink and beautiful. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.
Karl and Elise had been staying at the house almost constantly over the last week or so. We’d all been awakened by screams of pure terror. If I hadn’t been so sleepy from being woken up at four in the morning, I would have been amused to see Karl running around like a headless chicken looking absolutely terrified.
“Craig Carter you are not delivering this baby!” She’d been yelling as I darted into her room to find out what all the fuss was about.
“I’m not trying to, Elise,” he reassured her, calm as usual. “Just let me-”
She cut him off with a scream and hit him on the arm. I bit back a smile as I saw him wince. Craig was wincing from being hit by a girl.
“Will all of you just stop coddling me and get me to the hospital,” she said calmly.
I shook my head as I watched my brothers falling over each other trying to remember what car keys were, where one might keep them, and what should be done with car keys once they were located. My brothers were usually fantastically organised, but clearly not so much in the presence of a woman with her waters broken.
I’d felt a brief wave of anxiety as I stepped closer to Elise to help her but I’d quashed it because she was so strong. Even as she went into labour, she’d had the strength to whip my brothers into line.
All the panic at the house had been worth it. The past hour in the hospital had been so serene. My little niece had come to us with a smile. She had the Carter blue eyes, but they burned with her mother’s fiery personality. I liked her already.
“Give me back my daughter,” Karl demanded cheerfully.
I’d been the last to hold her and, as she was passed around, I’d seen Karl growing more and more restless with every second he couldn’t hold her in his arms. I was reluctant to let her go but I could see how much Karl needed to hold her.
“Come on Grace, your Daddy wants a cuddle,” I cooed happily to the little girl curled up asleep in my arms.
I saw Karl’s eyes light up as he heard the word Daddy. He looked so comfortable and at ease holding his daughter, but that shouldn’t have been a surprise. He’d been almost eleven when I was born and I knew he and Ian took as much care of me as Dad had done. The way he held her was so amazing to see. He held her so gently, so lovingly, as though she was the most precious thing in the world to him and I suspected that, next to her mother, she probably was.
“Grace Helen Carter,” Elise’s mother smiled happily from her bedside. “I like it. It is the name of a free spirit.”
My brothers all suppressed smirks at her remark. They’d never quite seen eye-to-eye with her worldviews.
“It’s a beautiful name,” I added quietly so that she knew that at least one of us was listening.
It was a beautiful name. They’d asked if any of us would mind if they gave Grace our mum’s name and nobody had minded. It somehow seemed right.
Jason and I hung around for a few more days so we could be there to wish the twins a happy birthday and be close in case Elise and Karl needed anything. They were fine though. They were managing perfectly and I figured it was good for them to be a family for a while. They needed to learn their own routines and patterns.
We couldn’t stay there forever. We needed to get my stuff moved into the new house and the contract for student halls was due to expire on the seventh so we had to go up the day before.
“We leave at five,” Ian frowned, watching me packing the last of my stuff into my bag.
“Is that really necessary, Ian?” I asked, cringing because I hated the idea that everyone would have to get up early because of me.
“There’ll be less traffic on the road,” he nodded.
I knew there was more that he wasn’t saying but I didn’t push it. I wasn’t looking forward to getting up so early but I figured I could just sleep in the car. I felt a bit guilty that my brothers would have to get up early but I’d find a way to make it up to them.
Elise brought Grace over so that I could spoil her with cuddles before we went back to Leeds. I almost had to fight with my brothers to be allowed to spend any time with her and I could tell they all adored her. That girl was going to be spoilt.
“You’re really good with kids,” Jason smiled uncertainly at me when we finally got a minute alone.
“I love children,” I smiled. “Don’t you?”
He shrugged noncommittally and I felt my heart sink a little. I already knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Jason, even though I knew I wasn’t ready for the rest of my life to start just yet. I had always pictured myself as part of a traditional Carter family with at least four children running around and causing havoc. I wanted my children to have what I had; siblings who would always be there for one another. The idea that Jason didn’t share that dream cut me deep to the soul.
“You don’t see yourself with kids one day?” I asked, trying hard to keep the hurt from my voice.
Jason shrugged again and refused to meet my eye. I wanted to confront him, wanted to get him to open up to me, but I knew he wasn’t ready. I could see that he wasn’t. I sighed inwardly and closed my eyes a second so that I wouldn’t push him. It hurt that there were still some things he couldn’t talk to me about but I knew that he would open up one day. I just had to give him time.
“Five o’clock! Really, Jelly?” Danny groaned, bursting into the kitchen as I put the tea and coffee cups in the dishwasher.
“Sorry,” I pouted. “Ian’s decision.”