by J. J. McAvoy
If you only knew how hard I was for you,
Your Sexy Pussy Fucker
P.S. I’m forever going to use that name against you.
P.P.S. You’ve told me nothing about Seoul or South Korea, our night together really has you dazed. Don’t forget you have a job you need to finish so you can do more than just Facetime.
P.P.P.S. I love you more than Peter Pan loves Neverland.
From: Guinevere Poe
Subject: Please note…
Date: October 12th at 3:17 AM (
To: Eli Davenport
Dear Sexy Pussy Fucker,
Please note that I was not in the correct frame of mind and should not be held accountable for anything I said, especially when you’re talking about tying me to a bedpost and…
Anyway, sorry I forgot, Seoul is beautiful and the food is AMAZING. Tell Ian I will never forgive him for not introducing Buldak into my life earlier.
Love,
Your Cherry On Top
P.S. I was not the only one giving out names.
P.P.S. You haven’t told me much about what has been going on back home. How is Sophia?
P.P.P.S. I love you more than a dominatrix loves her whips.
From: Eli Davenport
Subject: What I’m Thankful For
Date: November 25th at 7:13 AM
To: Guinevere Poe
Dear Cherry On Top,
I’m thankful that I met you. I’m thankful that not only did I fall for you, but you fell for me too. I’m thankful that you’re completely different from me because you make me see the world in a whole new way. I’m thankful you’re alive because it makes me feel alive too.
Sophia is growing by the day. My mother says she has my father’s eyes. I never realized I was missing so much until you both were in front of me. Sometimes I get your messages while she’s over and for the rest of the day nothing can bring me down. I feel blessed that you both are in my life…so blessed in fact that part of me feels guilty for those who have lost so much. Toby has gotten better, but not much. He’s lost his company, but luckily he’s got a good amount of wealth built up. He’s moved out of the city and now lives in the Hamptons where he spends most of his time fishing. When I visit we don’t talk much, just sit outside in the cold. I understood he was hurting, but it never really hit me until I realized how badly I love you and Sophia. If I lost either of you I don’t know how I would be even able to fish.
Anyway, be safe. All right…really.
Eli
P.S. I love you more than fish love water.
From: Guinevere Poe
Subject: I’m Thankful For…
Date: November 25th at 9:19 PM
To: Eli Davenport
You. Eli.
When I thought my life was over, when I couldn’t laugh or sleep or even focus on the people around me, you helped to bring me back.
I’m thankful your brother punched knives, forcing us to go to the hospital. I’m thankful for all of our fights and drunken rants.
If I could go back, I wouldn’t change anything. You were and are my second chance.
I only hope that one day Toby gets that second chance at love too.
If you’re safe, I’m safe.
Your Guinevere
P.S. I love you more than Cinderella loved Prince Charming.
From: Eli Davenport
Subject: Merry Christmas
Date: December 25th at 9:47 PM
To: Guinevere Poe
My Guinevere,
I miss you.
Your Eli.
P.S. I love you more than Romeo loved Juliet.
Eli
Almost a week had gone by and we hadn’t had much time to talk. She was busy getting ready to move to another country for the month and I was swamped between work and Sophia. Even so, I still missed her. It was one thing to say, “Let’s have a long distance relationship,” and another to actually be in one. Thanksgiving, Christmas, and now New Year’s…the holidays were hard enough to get through by yourself, let alone apart from the person you wanted to spend them with.
“Urgh, Eli what is wrong with you?” I groaned, lying back on my couch. Hannah had Sophia for New Year’s Eve and most of the next morning before we would trade off. It wasn’t the life I wanted for my daughter, to be bounced between parents, but I honestly didn’t know what else to do.
The last few months have been insane.
Grabbing my phone again, I refreshed my inbox.
Nothing.
When had I become this person? The type of guy who waited by the phone? It was annoying me and even still I was tempted to hit the refresh button again.
“Five.”
“Four.”
“Three.”
“Two.”
“One.”
I counted down, hearing the cheers roar outside the window.
Happy New Year.
For the third time I hit refresh and the moment I saw the notification, I sat back up against the couch.
From: Guinevere Poe
Subject: Happy New Year
Date: January 1st at 12:01 AM
To: Eli Davenport
Being away from each other like this is hard…too hard, Eli.
“That’s it? She has to be fucking kidding me.” I muttered, tossing the phone onto the other side of the couch and getting up. Taigi glanced up at me, barked once, and then turned his head away as if he couldn’t even be bothered. “Don’t start with me.”
Pulling off my shirt, I threw it on the couch before heading to the bathroom. Whatever freak out Guinevere was having, I’d deal with it in the morning. I was far too tired to even—
BARK
BARK
“Taigi!” I hollered as I pulled off my pants. He whimpered, then went silent.
BARK
BARK
BARK
BARK
What in the hell?
“Taigi what is—” I started to say as I headed into the living room. Then I saw her. My Guinevere, dressed in a dark, knee-length red dress and gold sparking heels that were not on her feet but beside them. Next to that was a winter jacket. Her brown hair was a mess, some parts of it blown out from what I could only guess had been the wind, other parts curled tightly. She was even sweating a little bit, her chest still rising and falling.
“I… Gu…” I couldn’t put what was on my mind into words because I wasn’t sure if I was dreaming or not.
“I’m late,” she said, taking a deep breath, a frown on on her beautiful lips. “I wanted to make it here before the count down. But this city is like a maze—”
With each word I walked closer and closer to her, until I was right in front of her. My hands cupped the sides of her half-frozen face.
“You’re here,” I whispered, amazed.
“I’m late, but I’m he—”
I kissed her. I couldn’t not kiss her. Her body pressed up against mine and her arms wrapped around my neck. God I missed this. All of it, the taste of her, the sounds she made as I grabbed her ass, my hands traveling down until I reached her hips and lifted her up, her legs wrapping around me tightly.
“You’re here,” I repeated softly.
She grinned. “I’m here. I’m also homeless because I sold my apartment hoping that my Dr. Asshole, Boyfriend, Sexy Pussy Fucker, Eli would take pity on me and let me stay with him.”
“I don’t understand.” I still wasn’t a hundred percent sure this was real. She was in my apartment, in my arms, and she wanted to stay.
“Didn’t you get my email? I don’t want to be apart any more. I want to be here with you. So do you mind, Dr. Asshole, Boyfriend, Sexy Pussy Fucker, Eli?” She smiled so wide I couldn’t help but smile back.
“I’ll have to
think about it… Your snoring is kind of a deal breaker…”
She made a face at me before trying to pull away, but I only held her tighter. I didn’t want to let go or look away.
“Guinevere.”
“Yea?”
“Don’t panic when I say this but…I’m going to marry you.”
She didn’t say anything and I knew she understood what I meant. There was no doubt in my mind that she was the one I was meant to be with all along.
I loved her more than I loved myself.
Sneak Peek at A BLOODY KINGDOM
This is Chicago
The land of crooks
Liars
Thieves
And murders.
The home of those who hope
In spite of no hope
Where children become gangsters
And gangsters are coated in blue.
The Capital of fuck you.
A place of beauty
A place of despair
The land of the unholy
Yes, THIS. IS. CHICAGO!
A kingdom most bloody…
~J.J. McAvoy
PROLOGUE
“I feel like myself, strong and weak at once.”
~ Veronica Roth
MELODY
The moment my feet touched the marble flooring at the entrance of our house, I felt my whole body relax. The coolness of the floor eased my aching feet as our butler reached for my coat.
“Welcome home, Ma’am. Would you like anything?” He nodded and folded my coat over his arm.
“Are the children in bed?” I questioned as I leaned over to pick up my black Dolce and Gabbana heels from the ground.
“Yes, Ma’am. And the master is in his study.”
The master? I’m sure Liam enjoyed that one. Without another word to him, I headed up the stairs. Once again because of the goddamn teachers union, I was coming home late. Knowing Ethan, he was still probably trying to stay awake. He never went to bed without seeing me first and I looked forward to it more than anything else in the world…he, all of my children, made my heart ache in the best possible way. I didn’t understand it. I barely recognized myself with them…I was at peace. It felt odd. I’d never felt peace in all of my life.
Since I was child, my father beat into me that I was a Giovanni. I needed to be strong. Be ruthless. As a teenager, I watched as he slowly died in front of me, his legacy fading along with him. I gave my life to the Italian family. As an adult, I fought my mother, my grandfather; the world felt like it was going to crumble around me. And yet I made it to the other side and every time I looked into my children’s, face I saw that victory.
My life had changed drastically over the years and it still felt like a dream.
“Knock, knock.” I whispered softly. I poked my head inside Ethan’s room and saw him shift immediately. Smiling to myself, I dropped my heels by the corner of the door before running towards his bed and jumping next to him to tickle his sides.
“Mommy!” He laughed outright, his body twisting and turning away from me, which only made me tickle him more.
“Someone is up past their bedtime,” I said as I sat up and ran my hands through his messy brown hair.
“You promised to come home early,” he said with a frown.
“Blame the teachers,” I said, cupping his face.
“I w—” He coughed before he could finish his statement. But it wasn’t just one cough. He grabbed on to his chest, his whole body leaning forward.
“Ethan? Sweetheart?” I grabbed on to him, his face slowly turning purple. “ETHAN!” I yelled.
“Momma…” he gasped, blood coming from his nose.
“ETHAN! ETHAN! LIAM! LIAM! HELP ME!” Picking him up, I ran towards the door when—
BANG
BANG
BANG
The gunshots never ending, all of coming from…
“WYATT! DONA!”
“Ma’am, we’re under attack!” Fedel yelled and rushed into the room.
“Attack, who?” Fuck, none of that mattered. “Take him! Take care of him now!” I basically threw Ethan into his arms.
“Ma’am, it’s not safe!”
“SAVE MY SON!” I screamed, spit flying from my lips as I ripped the family photo off the wall beside Ethan’s desk. Behind it, I’d stashed my assault rifle, and Glock along with three magazine clips. Strapping them, I didn’t even hesitate before kicking in the door to Wyatt and Dona’s room.
Blood.
On the walls, the floor, but worst of all—all over them.
“Urgah…” A sound that didn’t even seem human came from lips—my eyes on fire as I stared at my children. My babies. “No…no. No. No.”
It was the only word I knew as I ran to them. Wyatt’s body over Dona’s, both of them slumped over the bed.
“Wyatt, sweetheart,” I whispered, petting his head. “Come on, this isn’t funny…get off your sister. Dona baby, push your brother off okay?”
They didn’t move.
They didn’t breathe.
They just lay there…like dead things.
“No…No…” Lying on top of them, I hugged tightly. I didn’t understand. What happened? What was happening?
BANG
BANG
BANG
Again the shots rang out. I didn’t even bother to pick up the guns that I’d dropped. But even opening the door felt impossible; my body felt as if it was going numb. I wasn’t sure if I was fainting or crying, but my vision blurred.
“Mel, run!”
It was only because it was him. Liam. His voice made everything clear again and I wished it hadn’t. I didn’t want to see him like that. On his knees, a gun pointed at his head. His green eyes wide with fear, but for himself, not me.
“Mel, go! GO!” he screamed before the man smacked him across the side of the face with the butt of his gun. His lip ripped open, blood dripping down to the Persian carpet I had been forced to buy at one of those damn charity drives with Evelyn.
“Mel—” He never looked away from me, even as he took another hit.
Stop, I thought.
“Stop,” I whispered.
“Please stop!” I finally yelled.
“Please? What have I told you about saying please, Melody?” The man turned around and when he did, all the air in my lungs evaporated.
“Dad?”
“Am I? Because the daughter I trained, the daughter I raised, she isn’t this weak? Melody Nicci Giovanni, the daughter of Iron Hands, Bloody Melody—that is who you are. What? You thought just because you defeated the Russians, your mother and your grandfather, that it was over? That you’d just ride off into the sunset with your Irish family! THERE IS NO SUN FOR YOU, MELODY! There is no place you can hide. There will always be someone after you. How many goddamn times do I have to teach you this lesson?”
“This isn’t real.” I shook my head and backed away. “I’m going to wake up now.”
“If this isn’t real, then you wouldn’t mind?” he questioned once again—this time with the gun pressed into Liam’s head and I knew this wasn’t real. I knew it, but I couldn’t stop my heart from racing.
“Look at you. I should have never let you into this family. They’ve made you weak. You are a boss, Melody. You belong to the Mafia. Not the Brady Bunch. Get your head out of the fucking clouds and act like who you are.”
BANG
His body fell over sideways, blood pooling out in front me…his eyes never looking away.
“LIAM!”
My eyes opened as I snapped up from bed, gun in hand, my heart still pounding against my chest, my whole body coated in sweat.
“Mel? What is it?” Liam sat up on his elbow, his eyes still half shut.
“Nothing. Sorry, go back to bed,” I whispered, lifting the sheets up and sliding my feet out to the side.
I could still feel his eyes as I walked to the bathroom.
Closing the door behind me, I dropped the gun by the sink before reaching ov
er and turned on the faucet.
“Breathe. Just breathe,” I whispered to my reflection as I tried to shake the images from my mind.
Liam dead.
Ethan dead.
Wyatt dead.
Dona dead.
Just me. Always just me…the thought scared me. Me who had spent almost all of my life being alone was scared of being alone. Just when I was feeling…like a Callahan…of course my father would pop up in my mind to remind me I was Giovanni before everything else.
“Damn Orlando. You’ve really fucked me up.” I smiled even though it wasn’t at all funny.
Washing my face, I stepped back out expecting to see Liam in bed. Instead he leaned against the wall to the bathroom, his eyes shut and his arms crossed over his bare chest. Lazily, he opened his eyes and looked over to me, the corners of his mouth turned up.
“You okay?” he asked.
This. This was the reason why I was afraid to be alone…since we got married, since I came into his house, he never looked away from me, he never let me be alone. He always had my back and so I leaned on him.
I was weak for him.
“Mel?”
“Yeah.” I took his hand. “Let’s go to bed, tomorrow we’ve got so much to do.”
He groaned and followed me towards our bed before jumping on top of me forcing us both to fall.
“Love you.” He snickered when I tried to wiggle out of his arms, but he held me tighter.
Sighing, I gave up. “Love you too.”
Like always, he fell asleep with ease. I, on the other hand, just lay there brushing my hands through his hair, wide awake and remembering the number one rule my father had always cautioned me to.
Never get comfortable because I will only know peace the day I die.
ONE
“I am an American, Chicago born – Chicago, that somber city – first to knock, first admitted; sometimes an innocent knock, sometimes a not so innocent."