by Dawn McClure
“So what, you expected us to sit out in the car instead of coming inside?”
“I never said that. I just thought you’d be a few more days, that’s all. I texted you and told you about the storm the same day you called. I didn’t think you’d try to outrun it.” He glanced at the entrance to the kitchen, thinking he’d better get back out to Mel. He needed to take her home and sort all of this out. He wasn’t in a relationship with Mel, but he felt the need to explain this situation in better detail. All he’d said before he’d left her in the living room with Ben was, “Mel, this is Ben. Ben, this is Mel. Can you give us a minute?”
After the night he and Mel had shared together, this scenario felt wrong on so many levels. Which was stupid. He knew there would never be anything between him and Mel again, and after today he likely wouldn’t see her again in years. He needed to focus on the here and now. Ben was back. John could make sure he had a good breakfast and dinner again. He could reiterate how important school was. He just didn’t think that Jessica was gunning for Mother of the Year in any of those categories.
“Listen, I need to drive Mel home, check on cattle and get the generator running. It’s Christmas morning. She should be at home celebrating with her own family. I’ll get the generator running and situated before I leave. It should only take me a few minutes. When I get back we can talk.”
“Where were you last night?”
“We got stuck in town. At the Espresso Café.” The café was one of Jessica’s favorite places.
“I missed you, John.”
John looked at Jessica—really looked at her—for the first time since he’d walked in the door. Even after driving through most of the night and not having electricity on when she’d arrived, she’d done her hair and makeup. She’d worn one of her nice sweaters and a pair of expensive ripped jeans. She’d had enough money to buy fake nails, and because she was barefoot, he could see she’d gotten a pedicure too. Ben was in threadbare pajama bottoms that had stains on them.
She hadn’t missed him and he hadn’t missed her. He felt sorry for her. Sorry for her son. Pissed that the timing of her arrival made him feel as though he’d done something wrong. But he knew without a shadow of a doubt that she hadn’t missed him. Her declaration had come from seeing him with another woman. She was scared. Scared he wouldn’t help her out because Mel might be living with him. Jessica figured if he were in a relationship, then that meant she had to leave.
He wasn’t sure exactly what he was going to do, but first thing was first. “I’ll be back. Don’t worry about having a place to stay, Jessica. You know you can stay here. Bull all this other crap about missing me has got to stop. We’re past that bullshit. We haven’t been a true couple for over a year.”
The fear went out of Jessica’s eyes instantly. She searched his face for several seconds before she must have come to the conclusion that he wasn’t bullshitting her. “I’m sorry, John. I just didn’t know who else would take us in.”
She was the opposite of Sophie. Jessica hadn’t rebounded from the split from Ben’s dad like Sophie had from her husband years ago. Jessica had suffered an unfortunate run of extremely bad luck since her senior year of high school. She wasn’t a bad person. She just didn’t have the tools to forge a better life for herself and her son. John was going to change that—without the pretense of a relationship this time. “Like I said, I’ll be back shortly. I have to drop Mel off at her place. When I get back we’ll have lunch and I’ll run into town to get Ben’s presents. Let me go start the generator.”
He headed out of the kitchen and into the living room where he’d left Mel and Ben. Mel was on her hands and knees helping Ben hook up his video game. The power was off, but apparently that hadn’t deterred them in the least. John would get the generator running in the next few minutes.
Just as he opened his mouth to say that, the light came on in the kitchen. There were a few beeps and sounds throughout the house, and one excited whoop from a little boy who realized the power had come back on. Ben grabbed the remote off the coffee table, and within seconds the flat-screen TV came to life.
Ben held the remote high in the air and wiggled it. Then, as he turned to give Mel a smile, he caught sight of John. “Look, John! The power’s back on!”
And amidst all the crap that had just happened in the last twenty-four hours, Mel sat back on her heels and turned to give John a huge smile. A smile that said so many things. She was happy that Ben was happy. That jealous bone of hers obviously hadn’t snapped.
She’d matured. Another surprise, since she’d been a college student when she’d left, and he had certainly kept her that age in his mind. She was a woman who was sure of herself. Like mother, like daughter.
He stood there staring at her, one fact weighing down all the emotions currently claiming the cavity of his chest: She was headed to California soon.
And he had never loved her more than in that moment.
Chapter 16
Mel and John were finally able to leave his ranch. Several hours had passed because he’d had trouble with the generator, and then he’d had a few head of cattle missing. Mel had played video games with Ben while Jessica had showered and made them all something to eat.
It was surreal and awkward, and thankfully it was over and she could breathe a sigh of relief.
“When do you leave?” John asked.
It was the first thing he’d said other than “I’m sorry,” over and over again. Mel buckled her seatbelt as John maneuvered the truck onto the road. Looked like the city plow had made a few passes while they were inside, because both lanes were now clear. “The day after tomorrow,” she answered him.
The snowflakes were tapering down to nothing. The wind had all but quit. The storm had passed.
As John drove her home, Mel thought back to why she’d come home to Pine Grove in the first place. For one, she was supposed to showcase that small town feel in her articles and pictures. Cindy had wanted rustic country. Mel felt she’d delivered on that, only she wasn’t so sure that pictures of freshly fallen snow or children opening presents was going to cinch her that promotion, and that was all she had to give the readers today. She might as well kiss that promotion goodbye. Her Christmas Day article wasn’t going to top her Christmas Eve article, and it was going to be late to boot.
And two, she’d come home to close chapters. Specifically John’s chapter. If she were being honest with herself, seeing Ben had helped aide that process. She and John were in two very different places right now. She was setting up her career, and finally making advances in that area. She was ready to settle down. Start a family.
John wasn’t. In a strange way he already had a family.
And yet something lingered inside her chest, as though to tell her she shouldn’t close this chapter. Something unexplainable that wouldn’t go away. Love, she supposed. She loved John. But, as far as circumstances went, they were at a loss. Even if they were in the same place figuratively—which they weren’t—they certainly weren’t literally. There truly wasn’t anything for her in Pine Grove when it came to her career. She wasn’t ready or willing to let go of all she’d worked for the past several years.
She’d been weighing Liam and John’s qualities as though she were shopping for mattresses. Trying to figure which mattress would be better suited for her back. Firm or soft? Ridiculous.
Accepting a marriage proposal was a huge next step, and though she didn’t feel butterflies when Liam walked into a room, she did love him. Not in the same way she loved John. John was a comfortable throw blanket you could take anywhere in the house. It was a little worn, and you could easily put it in the washer and dryer because it was smaller than your average blanket. He was like a throw your grandmother had given you. You’d never toss it in the garbage, no matter how tattered it became.
Liam was an expensive comforter. It kept you warm at night, and it looked so great in your room, you wanted to show it off. You snuggled into it at night. It made you fee
l comfortable and warm.
And it lived in California. That damn throw was halfway across the country.
Everyone had to make decisions that effected their lives on a daily basis. Some decisions were easy, and some were hard. Having only been in Pine Grove for a few days, she couldn’t really say for certain that she truly wanted to come back. She’d been on vacation—a working vacation, but a vacation nonetheless. She hadn’t worked eight hours of the day, and she certainly hadn’t had to do all those things she normally did, like workout at the gym, rush off to meetings, clean her house.
Her Pine Grove visit wasn’t real life. Not in the sense that she’d experienced over the past week. And her feelings for John were skewed, because she hadn’t seen him in a while.
“Do you need a ride to the airport?”
She shook her head. “No. I have my rental.”
“Mel—”
She waved off whatever it was he was going to say, feeling as though she’d shatter into a million pieces if he went in the same direction her thoughts were going. If he said he loved her, she’d fall apart. She didn’t have the liberty to do so. She had a job and a life. “John, you don’t have to explain yourself to me anymore. You have your life, just as I have mine. I know and understand what you’re going to do for Ben, and I think you’re a saint. We just…” she left the rest of what needed to be said in the center of her chest. Just left it there.
The rest of the ride was uncomfortable. He definitely didn’t grab her hand as he had when they’d been driving up to his house. Before Jessica and Ben. Before reality had delivered that last blow.
When he pulled up to her house, she turned the tables and grabbed his hand and squeezed, unable to leave the vehicle without some form of contact. “It was nice seeing you again. You take care of yourself.”
He nodded, barely looking at her. She reluctantly let go of his hand and exited the vehicle, wondering why it was so hard to take a breath. Nonetheless, she put one foot in front of the other and repeatedly told herself not to look back. Close the chapter, Mel. Close the chapter.
Her mother had already cleared the snow from the porch. Mel took her time going up the porch steps, hoping not to slip as she heard the sound of John’s truck pull away. She opened the door, a strange sense of numbness taking over her body. She slipped out of the jacket John had given her and hung it up, taking a long, deep breath. She wanted to run back outside. Wave him down. Tell him not to go.
Grow up, Mel.
She made her way down the hall, and once in the kitchen, she heard voices in the living room. She’d seen Brian and George’s truck in the drive, so she knew they were here. She was sure Tim would be around later, after his family had their own little Christmas morning with the little ones.
When she came into the living room she was prepared for the shit-talk. She was sure Brian was going to start ragging on her about staying overnight with John, and possibly about her California driving skills—great for five o’clock traffic and shit for snow-covered roads—and their mom having to send someone out to rescue her.
But all those thoughts were blown out of her mind when she walked into the living room and stopped dead in her tracks. At first her brain couldn’t wrap around what she was seeing—or who she was seeing—so she just stood and stared.
“Hello, Melanie.”
When Liam Marks intended to do something, he did it. How had Melanie so easily forgotten who she was dating? A change in plans certainly wouldn’t deter a man like him.
She should have known. Not even a blizzard would have kept Liam from proposing on the day he’d chosen.
_______
John was halfway home before he remembered the presents in the backseat of his truck. He pulled over and ran a hand down his face. It wasn’t as though the presents couldn’t wait. Of course they could. He just didn’t want to go another five years without seeing Mel. Couldn’t.
Damn he’d missed her. He hadn’t known how much he’d missed her until she’d been standing on the sidewalk, shivering in that little red sweater of hers. She was like a piece of him. No matter what was going on in his life right now, he didn’t want to go back to the way things had been between them.
By the time John turned around and headed back to Sophie’s house, he had made a decision. He’d give Jessica some money, offer to help her get her footing once again in Pine Grove, but he’d keep a polite distance. Hell, he’d even pay for her first and last month’s rent, give her a loan. Whatever he had to do. Jessica wasn’t a bad person, she just needed help.
And as for Ben, John had to realize he wasn’t a stray cat. The child needed a stable household, and keeping the two of them around because he felt sorry for Ben wasn’t creating that for the child. John would never be his dad, and to pretend otherwise was cruel. He wouldn’t cut himself completely out of Ben’s life, but to act like his caregiver was only going to screw everyone up in the long run.
He was going to head into Sophie’s house and pull Mel aside and beg her to stay—exactly what he should have done in the airport eight years before. Sometimes you could right an old wrong, and that’s exactly what he was going to do.
There was something between them. Some would call it chemistry. Others lust. He called it love. A connection he could no more deny than the need to eat or drink. He loved Mel. Always would. He wasn’t about to sit back and watch her leave again. Not when he could try and stop her. If she decided not to come back to Pine Grove, then at least he couldn’t blame himself if he gave it his best shot.
He pulled into Sophie’s drive and quickly cut the engine. With a new pep in his step and a hopeful heart, he grabbed the presents out of the backseat and headed up the porch steps. Things would work out. Don’t let your nerves get the better of you.
He opened the door without knocking and put the presents down by the shoe bin, kicked out of his shoes and shrugged out of his jacket, hanging it next to Mel’s. He smiled. All was not lost.
He headed toward the voices he heard. No one was in the kitchen or dining room, so he rounded the corner to head into the living room
Melanie, still in the clothes she’d worn yesterday, stood with a hand to her throat. A man in dark grey slacks and a white shirt knelt in front of her. He was handsome. Model-type handsome, with a clean-shaven face and short, black hair. John came to a dead stop as though he’d run into an invisible wall. But no one saw him. All eyes were on the couple standing near the Christmas tree. For good reason.
The man opened up a small, black box, revealing a beautiful ring. “Melanie Edwards. Will you do me the utmost honor of becoming my wife?”
All the breath left John’s lungs. He didn’t make a sound. He suddenly felt like an intruder. A thousand things raced through his mind. Was this a surprise proposal? How and when did this guy get here? Last night, or this morning? Did he fly commercially? Own a jet? Stupid, ignorant questions ran through his mind.
Mel was angled slightly away from John. She couldn’t see him, and she probably didn’t care, because she nodded her head and said yes.
John couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t talk. A small part of him wanted to shout no! But the bigger part of what he wanted to do won.
She never saw him leave.
Chapter 17
The office was perfect. The office furniture—black leather and glass—was a little too cosmopolitan and modern for Mel. The large window, which was from floor to ceiling, overlooked the small park where she and some of her co-workers ate their lunch. Just a few trees, a walking trail, some benches and a water fountain in the middle. A little slice of country in the midst of towering buildings.
Liam’s proposal had gone viral, thanks to Brian’s new fiancé, Macy. She hadn’t known Macy was recording, and the tears Mel shed in the video were real. They were from shock. From disappointment. From wishing she’d told her family about Liam before he’d made a surprise proposal in front of them. Her mom had been absolutely flabbergasted, having thought Liam was just a guy she dated. No on
e had thought they were serious. Because she’d never made mention of him.
Mel left her perch at the glass wall and sat back at her glass desk. Christmas was two weeks ago, but it felt like a lifetime had passed. She was downright melancholy.
She wanted to go home.
The door to her office opened, and Cindy shouldered through. “I’ve known you a long time, and in that time I have never seen you so…subdued. Or is it depression? I can’t tell from here.”
“Depression isn’t something to joke about.”
“Tell me about it. I’m the one on pills.”
Mel looked up from the paperwork she’d been staring at but not seeing. She’d thought the new office and shiny new ring would have a balming effect on what she considered might be a wounded heart. She knew she shouldn’t need one man’s ring—a cherished sign of everlasting love—to cover the pain another man had left. It was wrong. Abhorrent.
Necessary. “I emailed you my article for March’s issue,” Mel said, leaning back in her chair. Blog articles could go up within a day. Magazine articles had to be written several months in advance. “It should be sitting nice and pretty in your inbox.”
“That’s not why I stopped in.” Cindy held up to-go cups.
Café mochas. Mel tensed in her chair when Cindy took the seat opposite her across the desk. It was a move Mel had made a hundred times with her friend, but never on the flip side—though to be fair, Mel had never really had an office Cindy could go to until now.
She somehow doubted Cindy was heading into Mel’s office with a personal problem of her own. So Mel didn’t even try to beat around the bush. She accepted the mocha, took a sip and set it down. “We kissed on Christmas morning.”