by Susan Lowry
She nodded, but her racing heart was making her ill. She gasped. “I thought you weren’t real for a second.”
“You look pale,” he said. “Put your head between your legs for the blood to flow back into it.”
She rested her head on her knees and mumbled. “I didn't expect anyone—”
“Sorry… I startled you.”
She lifted her head and gazed up at him. “Where did—”
“I just got into town. Your fresh car tracks were out on the main road, in the sand,” he explained. “I could barely believe it.”
“I thought…” She blinked at him. “Man! You are real.”
His brow lifted and he extended his arm. “I'm Jack… so sorry I—”
“Kate,” she said, allowing him to embrace her hand in his large palm. “It’s been four months since…” she said.
He sat down on the step beside her. “I know. Four and a half. Feeling any better?”
She nodded. “I’m fine now, really. It was just the initial shock but, you know… I didn’t think it would affect me like that… I mean I was hoping to find people. And not after everything else.” She supported her head in her cupped palm and gazed at him. “I’m in pretty good shape, relatively speaking, considering the plague nearly did me in. What about you?” She could already see the scars on his skin.
He looked out at the ocean and with almost a grimace, sighed. “Nope. I didn’t expect to survive it either. Looks like a decent place you’ve found here, by the ocean.”
She peered at his profile.
“Where did you come from?” she said, hearing her tone of surprise.
“Well, I’ve been on the road about two months, weaving my way out here. Started out in Florence,” he said soberly, turning to nod at her and then gazing back at the ocean. “Colorado. Nothing but corpses out there… Everywhere you go.”
“I—I was planning to get more supplies again tomorrow. The Publix isn’t too bad you know. Up the road,” she said. “Hardly any bodies in there.”
“The outskirts are the only way to go,” he agreed. “Tolerable compared to the cities. Disaster zones… every one of them.”
“Was there any wildlife out your way?” she asked. “I didn’t see anything at all.”
He frowned, glanced at her briefly and drew together his dark brows. “Seems to have wiped out the entire country’s livestock, as far as I’ve seen. Cows, pigs, horses, poultry — all dead. As for the wildlife?” He covered his eyes and sighed, as if he was trying to remember. “Not many birds… a few here and there, some fish in the rivers; I did see squirrels though, now that I think of it, two of them, not far from here.”
“I haven’t noticed a decline in insects though,” she said. “And I seem to have three seagull comrades. Always around when I’m out on the beach.”
He gazed at her. “I noticed you got lucky with your pet. What is it, a parrot?”
Kate blinked. “Oh, you mean Snowy. No he’s a cockatiel, belonged to my neighbour, Wendy. But how did you—”
“He’s loud. I heard him singing from down the road.”
“When was that?” she snapped, immediately wishing that she hadn’t.
His eyes shifted. “A few hours ago. I knocked.”
“You did?”
“Yeah.”
“I was on the beach. And then I was sitting on the swing for a while, and then I had a nap.”
“Look, when you didn’t answer I decided to go for a walk. Got back a few minutes ago. I was going to knock again but then you came out before I could.”
“Oh,” she said, unsure of what to think.
He bit his lip, took off his shades and peered into her eyes with a dark, strained look. “You were telling me about Snowy.”
“Oh, right. Well, it was certainly inspiring, let’s say, to discover he’d survived. He keeps me company. You know… a pair of ears to listen to my troubles — not to mention my screams — especially on the way down here. We were stuck, snowed-in up in Ontario… no heat, lights, phone… nothing. It was cold.”
She paused. There was something in his eyes. He’d definitely been watching her out on the beach earlier… that was it. He remained quiet and so she continued.
“I wasn’t planning to stay too long here though,” she said. “Was going to be heading west in a bit.”
Jack looked confused. “Err… do you have family out that way?”
“Not that I’m aware of. No… Just want to continue my search for more survivors,” she sighed. “I had a feeling there were others and it looks like you’ve just proven me right.”
“Here I am,” he said soberly.
Chapter Sixteen
Hot on the Beach
(April 22nd, Year One, PA)
Kate fluffed her pillow, flopped back down and gazed out her bedroom window at the stars. Jack had been there for two whole nights now and she could not get him out of her mind. She hadn’t exactly realized it at the time, but the electricity — even during that first, bizarre conversation — had been present; a flowing current when he was near her that was difficult to ignore.
She’d been alone far too long. He claimed to be a doctor, a pediatrician. And surprisingly, it wasn’t his intelligence or even his tall, dark and handsome looks that she found so appealing. He had other qualities that were strangely compelling; his disposition was sober, with a mysterious depth that seemed impermeable, yet alluring. She found herself sitting closer, touching his strong arm and gazing with fascination into his dark, unreadable eyes when she spoke to him.
He’d seemed terribly shocked each time she laughed at his words and then a tiny amount of pleasure would seep into his eyes, revealing a hint of repressed humour. That would make her smile as she continued to talk to him.
But sometimes when he looked at her, with those obscure eyes, she felt her stomach churn slightly. She was certain he had secrets… but then, so did she.
“What?” he had asked earlier. She had been peering inquisitively at him.
“Nothing. You just seem cut-off somehow though. I—I’d love to see what’s going on inside that complex brain of yours. But, I guess we have plenty of time for that,” she’d snickered.
That evening after a swim, he heated some oil in a frying pan over the barbeque grill and sautéed some fresh onions - they had discovered them earlier, growing in a nearby backyard garden — with a can of mushrooms. When they were caramelized, he threw in some canned chicken and doused it with red wine and lots of spices.
They had eaten the meal out on the veranda and were finishing the rest of the wine when he said quite seriously, “I’m glad I found you Kate. Of course I’d like to stay around — but only if you want me to. You’re not stuck with me or anything.”
She was sure that she’d blushed. With the edge of her thumbnails she had been making an ornate design in the wine cork and examined it as she replied, “Don’t be silly. I’m happy that you’re here too.”
Later, she’d yawned, “Well, all that swimming has made me exhausted. I'm hitting the sack. Goodnight.”
It felt safe having him there, just outside her bedroom in case she wanted to talk, or something.
She drifted off to sleep. Jon was now in bed beside her with his tousled blonde hair and concerned brown eyes. “Get away from here as fast as you can Katie — that man is dangerous,” he urged.
“I know what I'm doing Jon. I’m the one who’s still alive. It's my decision.”
Jack was rapping on her door. “Kate?” She could see him peering through the crack at her. “Can I come in?”
He didn't wait for an answer. He sat on the side of her bed and frowned. “Did you have a nightmare? I heard you screaming.”
“I don’t remember.”
He pulled his legs up on the bed and lay back against the headboard. Then he gazed down into her eyes. “Do you mind if I lie down? I just want to be close to you for a while, nothing else.”
“No, I don’t.”
He shuffled down, sli
pping his arm under her and pulling her close until her head rested on his shoulder. But neither of them had any words. She stared up at the ceiling with her thoughts whirling around. What kind of a life was waiting for them?
Soon all of the manufactured food and bottled water would be toxic. They’d have to start over — anything similar to the civilization they’d known could never be recreated. All of that was lost. It was too much to fathom.
She felt comforted, but uneasy at the same time. They had been thrown together by catastrophe and if they couldn’t make it work, they’d be entirely alone. Enough of that. They both suddenly peered into each other’s eyes and sighed.
The soft ocean air puffed in through the window screen with the sound of it breathing in the distance. She drifted off to sleep in Jack’s arms.
(May 2nd, Year One, PA)
In the morning he was still beside her, asleep. She studied his straight nose, wide forehead, the dark stubble on his handsome jaw. He appeared agitated. His eyes twitched beneath their lids, long wisps of hair falling across his tensed brow. A vein pulsated beneath the skin on his hot, moist neck.
Her gaze skimmed his tanned arms, broad shoulders, and his wide firm chest — nipples visible through a thin, black t-shirt. She was almost disappointed he hadn’t tried something last night.
But she didn’t know him. He’d shared so little of his life with her — even when she’d not so subtly encouraged him to open up; their conversations were restricted to the present.
It would not be good to start anything yet. God, he was good looking though.
She couldn’t possibly tell him about the boy and Ping. It seemed ridiculous to even consider it. Why would he believe such things? Not having had a single conversation with either of them since Jack’s arrival, she was back at square one again anyway, suspecting they were figments of her imagination.
Usually, they would be thinking about each other at the same time when their minds linked. That hadn’t happened, but of course she’d been too busy with Jack.
Now, while he was still sleeping, she tried to reach them. But just as there was a feeling of connection Jack inhaled a deep breath, opened his eyes and gazed over at her. The sensation floated away.
His eyes seemed even gloomier when they were sleepy, but he made an honest attempt at being cheerful.
“You’re awake,” he mumbled, stretching out his arms with a yawn.
“Good morning,” she said.
He sat up on the edge of the bed. “Wait right there,” he said stumbling to his feet and out of the room. In a moment he came back handing her a box of orange juice. She sipped through the straw, watching Jack disappear with a bottle of water and a tube of toothpaste. She heard the backdoor and realized he had gone outside to brush his teeth.
His face appeared from the other side of the window behind the cottage. “Are you up for a swim?” he said, through the screen.
Kate followed him outside. “Jack, I need to talk to you about something.” She pulled on a light sweater over her bathing suit.
His vigorous brushing came to a halt, and the suspicious look in his eyes almost made her want to giggle. He spat, rinsed, spat again and wiped his entire face with a dampened cloth. “What?”
“Do you remember me telling you that I intended to go searching for more survivors?”
“Of course.”
“Well, I have a very strong feeling there are people out there who need our help desperately. I just can't get it out of my mind. I'd like to leave here fairly soon and I was hoping you’d—”
Jack gave her a look that was difficult to read. “Come with me,” he said, resting his toothbrush and water bottle on a rock.
“Where are you going?”
“Come on. Try and catch me.” He was jogging away from her.
“Jack… not this early. I'm not awake yet!”
It was their new game apparently — he’d started it the day prior, forcing each other to exercise and get stronger. Jack was adamant that what they needed more than anything was lots of physical activity. He was the doctor; and he seemed to have assumed the role of her personal trainer.
Undeterred, he formed his hands into fists and teased her with boxing gestures. She swung at him and then he ran.
“Jack,” she called. “Wait! Now I'm mad.”
By the time they reached the shore they were both out of breath. He fell laughing onto the sand and she collapsed beside him, waiting for her lungs to calm down and staring up at the clouds. When she gazed over at him he combed his fingers through her hair.
“The cold water is just what we need,” he huffed. “It will increase your stamina.”
“I'll wait ‘til the sun comes out, thanks.”
“Oh come on, don’t be a coward.”
“Jack… I wanted to talk—” He put his finger to her lips; on an impulse she kissed it, holding his hand close, mesmerized by his intense eyes — behind their brooding darkness she saw sparks and a delicious chill ran down her spine.
“Come here,” he whispered, gently guiding her chin toward him.
Their lips came together and the taste of him made her breathe deeply, her hand grasping the back of his neck, pulling him closer, her fingers spreading out and then roaming through his hair. She wanted more of him.
Her other hand came around, both palms sliding down to his shoulders, feeling his warm flesh. Her lungs were filling with his masculine smell which was making her weak; her mouth fell open wide and she sighed, yielding to his tongue, her hunger growing.
She pulled him down and climbed on top of him, feeling his body, firm and beautiful against hers. As her bare legs straddled him, her hands explored. She gazed down at his dark locks, stroking them back from his forehead. His tragic eyes penetrated her and her body began to quiver.
She tore his top over his head. Gazing up at her now with a look that seemed almost lethal, he skillfully loosened a clasp of her bikini top and it dropped away from her body into the sand. He paused, his eyes greedily taking her in.
Then he peeled off her bottoms, guided her back down in the sand and mounted her. She felt drunk from the sight of him and exhilarated by his gaze skimming her nakedness. Heart thumping, she helped him rip his shorts off.
Jack pressed himself against her, running his fingers over her flat belly and up over her breasts, grasping them firmly with both hands. She could feel the thunder of the rolling ocean rumble through her.
“Stop!”
But he was forcing her legs apart.
“Jack! I can't…”
He moved his body slow, breathing heavily, his face flanked close to hers with eyes wild like a leopard and yet in control. She inhaled his intoxicating scent.
“It’s okay,” he mumbled, unravelling a condom.
She moaned and pulled him closer, aching for more of him, burning and then igniting as he heaved — her body bursting into weightless fragments that floated like the mist above the sea.
Chapter Seventeen
A Shift in Priorities
(May 2nd, Year One, PA)
“I couldn’t imagine getting pregnant right now,” Kate said, peering through her sunglasses at Jack. She poured herself some cereal, added some warm soymilk from a tetra-pack and handed the boxes over to Jack. They had just finished a long, playful swim, and she was starving.
Jack's gaze was eating through her towel.
“I'm serious. Can you imagine dealing with a kid at a time like this? We have so much to work out; it would be the most hideous, unfair thing we could possibly do to a child, bringing it into such a vacuum. I mean, the things that could go wrong even in the best of—”
She suddenly noticed the yellow and purple wildflowers Jack had placed in a glass and snuck onto the table.
“Those are pretty. When did you pick them?” she smiled.
He grinned, took a mouthful of cereal and munched while he spoke. “A baby would be a mistake.”
She blew a sigh of relief through her lips. “I’m glad
we see eye-to-eye on that one. I mean, if there were actually more survivors, that could potentially be different. Otherwise I think it would be cruel – the child would have no-one after we die. But why are we even talking about something like this? I barely even know you,” she said, digging a spoon into her cereal.
“Well, it takes time to get to know someone,” he mumbled while chewing.
“You aren’t exactly forthcoming you know Jack. I feel like you already have so much more information about me than I do you.”
“My past is unimportant… it’s not part of who I am anymore.”
“Well, I hope you will share some of it. Anyway, I really wanted to discuss my plans with you earlier, before you got me sidetracked. I’m going to be leaving soon, to search for the others. Would you consider coming with me Jack?”
“There are no others,” he muttered, his eyes glued to his breakfast.
Kate stared at him, exasperated. “Don't say that. Why on earth would you give up so easily? We can't be the only ones. That isn’t logical.”
“Why isn’t it?”
She was losing her temper and took a deep, calming breath. “We need to be open-minded about this, and optimistic. What if you hadn't been looking? You never would have found me. Aren't you glad you did?”
“Of course I am.” Jack kept his eyes on his cereal.
“I’m so thrilled that you found me Jack, but I want more in my life than just the two of us. We need more people if we hope to have anything near a normal life. And when it comes down to it, that’s all I really ever wanted — normalcy.”
He put down his spoon finally and gazed solemnly into her eyes. “I’m afraid you need to face the reality of the situation Kate. Let’s just say, for argument’s sake, that there were a few more survivors out there somewhere. It’s an awfully big planet. Don’t you realize how remote the possibility of finding anyone would be? It’s staggering. Finding you was… well, like winning one hell of a lottery. We should consider ourselves incredibly lucky.”
Kate’s spirits were suddenly beginning to sink. What he was saying made too much sense. But she didn’t want it to.