by Julie Kenner
“You know what,” he said harshly. Unable to take anymore, he leaned forward, grabbed her arms and flipped her once more onto her back. She’d barely taken a breath before he thrust into her.
“Ahhhh,” he sighed, angling deep.
Winnie literally felt her eyes roll back in her head. A gasp caught and held in her throat. She wrapped her legs around his waist, then grabbed the twin globes of his ass and simply absorbed the feeling of having him inside of her.
Perfect. Flawless. Without blemish.
He bent and pressed a series of kisses along her jaw, punctuating each little caress with a determined thrust. Slow and steady, deep and sure.
God, he felt wonderful.
She squeezed his ass, and pushed up against him, trying to drag him more completely into her. She didn’t want to know where he ended and she began, she didn’t want to be aware of anything but the feel of his body—sleek skin, supple muscle, beautifully masculine—inside her own.
Winnie slid her hands over his back, along the narrow corridor of his spine, over his wide shoulders, then pushed her hands into his hair and brought his mouth down to hers for another kiss. His chest heaved against hers, abrading her nipples and her breasts bounced, absorbing the force of each thrust.
Harder and faster, he pushed and pushed and she could feel herself spiraling out of control again. He kindled the flame of orgasm and fanned it determinedly with each magnificent press of his body into hers.
Adam grabbed her hands, threaded his fingers through each one of hers and stretched them up above her head. Something about the movement shifted things between them—physically and emotionally—and she felt it on every level of her soul. He was laying her bare, making her vulnerable and she wanted that if it meant she could be his. She’d give everything to him, wouldn’t leave a single bit of herself left over.
She was his for the taking. Always had been. Always would be.
She arched up, flexed her hips against his, taking more and more of him.
Adam groaned, a masculine purr that made her feel distinctly feminine. A rare thing for a girl who was essentially a tomboy at heart. Maybe that’s what made him so special, Winnie thought, as the revelation unfurled like a morning glory to the rising sun. Maybe that’s why she felt so safe and protected with him?
Because she never felt like less of a girl when she was with him. She was always just…herself. Adam had given her the freedom to do that. To just be.
She smiled up at him and tightened around him as this newfound understanding wrapped itself around her heart, settling over her like a warm blanket.
Adam’s gaze tangled with hers and something about his territorial expression, the utter awe and defenselessness she saw in his gaze made the orgasm that had hovered just out of reach suddenly bear down on her. Her breath came in hard, labored little puffs and with every hammering blow he laid into her body, she got closer and closer, could feel release nearing the breaking point deep inside of her.
“Adam,” she groaned. “I need—I want—”
She bucked beneath him, tightened once more, holding on to him as he plunged in and out, in and out.
Without warning, he leaned forward and nipped at her skin, biting the sensitive flesh where neck met shoulder.
She shattered.
Wave after wave of sensation pulsed through her. Her mouth opened in a scream and she was surprised to discover that it wasn’t soundless, but tore from her throat with all the force of a battle cry. Her vision darkened around the edges, everything faded to gray, then black, then back to vivid color, shades she would have sworn she’d never seen before. Her body fisted around him and with every contraction of her orgasm, he continued to hammer into her, dredging every bit of pleasure he could from her.
Oh, no, Winnie thought. She wasn’t going to be the only one to literally come apart.
She leaned up and bit him, as well, a gentle nip that had instant and desired effect.
A guttural cry ripped from his chest and he seated himself so firmly into her she imagined it would take the Jaws of Life to get him out. She felt him shudder above her, his magnificent frame tense and shiver. Her badass, her wounded warrior, Winnie thought, as warmth pooled deep in her womb, igniting another little sparkler of pleasure.
Adam looked down at her and the emotions she saw reflected back at her made a lump well in her throat. She bent forward and kissed him, lingering until the moment it was almost too bittersweet to take.
With a soft sigh, he rolled off her, then dragged her up against his chest.
Contentment weighted her limbs and lids and she fell asleep listening to the sound of his heart beat—the most reassuring sound in her world—beneath her ear.
12
ADAM AWOKE THE NEXT morning with the feel of a soft, womanly body bellied up to his back, a sleek thigh pressed between his legs and an extremely large tabby cat curled around the top of his head.
In the time it took to mentally review and place all three, a smile was already sliding over his lips and images from the night before came rushing back to him, making him wish for a morning repeat.
Without the cat, he thought, feeling Fido’s tail swish across the top of his head.
Warm skin, supple breasts, her hot tight heat…
Winnie’s sweet palm lay curled against his chest and he could feel her soft, reassuring breath between his shoulder blades. Morning light spilled across her bed, bathing the room in a clear glow. Though he would love to turn over and look at her sleeping face, wondering what secrets he might discover in the relaxed visage, Adam didn’t want to risk waking her up.
A glance at the bedside clock confirmed the time—eight-thirty. Despite the fact that he didn’t want it to, reality soon intruded. The idea that he would be sitting in front of Colonel Marks this time tomorrow made him inwardly tense with regret.
Their time together was circling around, getting smaller and smaller, Adam thought, unwilling to name the ache that suddenly formed in his too tight throat. He swallowed tightly and bit it back.
He couldn’t think about that now. He’d have to think about it later, when he was alone. He would not spoil their remaining day together by being depressed over the inevitable outcome.
He was leaving. She was staying. This was the way it had to be.
They both had to move on.
Winnie would be better off, Adam tried to tell himself. She would grieve and mourn, of course—so would he—but ultimately she would heal and find someone else. Particularly if he didn’t leave her a choice. The idea of someone else taking his place in her life, his place in her bed, was more repugnant to him than he could have ever imagined. The absolute fury of the thought made him set his jaw so hard he thought his molars would crack.
Someone else…right here…with Winnie.
Her arm around someone else, her breasts against someone else’s back, her leg insinuated between someone else’s thigh.
Bile rose behind his teeth and the revulsion was almost impossible to swallow.
Dammit all to hell.
Adam knew that he was lucky to be alive, and even luckier that he’d only lost part of his leg. As far as amputee cases went, the fact that he’d been able to keep his knee had made his recovery and prognosis so much better than for those who didn’t. He had many things he should be thankful for.
But at the moment, he was having a hard time hanging on to that sentiment.
Because someone else would ultimately have his Winnie. And though he wasn’t ready to admit it to himself—couldn’t, dammit—he knew there was more to this than his irrational commitment to his career. Feelings of inadequacy as a result of the accident had been stirring in the back of his brain for months, but he’d refused to acknowledge them, telling himself that he was fine. He had to prove that he was normal. That he could be the same guy. And that same guy had never planned on this.
On Winnie.
As if he’d called her name, she stirred behind him, slid her knee further between
his legs and cuddled closer. He knew the exact moment when she awoke because her breathing changed—hitched a bit—then settled back into rhythm.
He put his hand over hers and squeezed. “Morning,” he said, his voice rusty.
“Hmm,” she agreed sleepily.
Unable to help himself, he turned to face her. Morning light gleamed over her messy, black curls and painted her skin with an ethereal glow. Her lips were soft and pink and a wash of color stained her cheeks. If he’d ever seen anyone so beautiful in his life, he couldn’t recall it.
Adam smiled at her. “You’re gorgeous, you know that?”
Her dark blue eyes widened with surprise, then the color deepened. She lowered her lashes, looking away. “Thank you.”
He blinked as a thought occurred to him. “I’ve never told you that before, have I?”
She bit her bottom lip and gave her head a small shake. “Not that I can remember, no.”
And she would have remembered, he knew. Adam tsked under his breath and shook his head. “I’m sorry. I’ve always thought it, you know? Even before the night we shipped off last year.”
And he had. While admittedly he’d never been romantically interested in her until then, he’d always been aware of how finely she was made. She had an interesting face. Wide forehead, heavily lashed blue eyes with a slight slant that neatly harmonized with her cheekbones. Smallish chin and the mouth… A mouth that was what wet dreams were made of. It was shockingly sexy.
Seemingly intrigued, Winnie peered over at him. “You did? Really?”
“I did.”
“Hmm.”
What sort of hmm was that? Adam wondered. He frowned. “What do you mean hmm?”
“You never said anything.”
“I was a fool.” He smiled. “And at the time I was a lot more interested in getting a hit off your knuckle ball than looking at your ass.” He reached down and filled his hand with a cheek. “Which is also especially fine.”
She chuckled wryly. “Yes, well. I’m sure there isn’t anything I can tell you that I haven’t told you before.”
He’d certainly had the advantage there, Adam thought. While she’d never been particularly vocal or forthright with her feelings, Adam had never had to wonder about how Winnie Cuthbert felt for him.
She’d loved him for as long as he could remember.
He’d said it to her a minute ago, but it beared repeating. “I was a fool.”
Winnie ran the pad of her cool finger along his jaw. “Yes, but you’ve always been my fool.”
And he was a fool for her now. Too little too late.
Evidently sensing the change in his mood, she cuddled next to him once more. “So…what’s on the agenda today?”
“You mean aside from going up to McKinney Point and having my wicked way with you so that we can fulfill one of your secret wishes?” He looked down at the floor. “I’ve, er…” He hated to bring this up, but it couldn’t be avoided. “I need to go home for a couple of hours and pack.” His mother, the saint, had been doing his laundry for the past couple of days in preparation.
Winnie went utterly still. “Pack? You mean you’re not coming back tomorrow afternoon?”
Damn. He should have mentioned this sooner. “No,” he admitted reluctantly. “I’m relatively certain of the outcome. I’ll get new orders. There will be a bit of paperwork that will need to be taken care of on base, so to expedite matters I’ll stay there until I go back to Baghdad.”
“Oh.”
One word and it slayed him.
“I…see.” Winnie sat up and looked away from him. “Excuse me a minute,” she said, her voice hoarse. “Erm… Nature calls.”
Dammit, he’d made her cry, he thought as she darted naked to the bathroom. The sound of the faucet rang out like a gunshot in the quiet house. Behind him, Fido meowed loudly, twitched his tail, then dropped from the bed and went in search of Winnie.
A few minutes later, her lashes a bit wet, she donned an off-center smile and came back into the bedroom. “So when were you planning on going home today then?”
“Winnie you don’t have to pretend for me, okay? I know you’re upset.” He felt like a first-class bastard.
Her smiled slipped. “I am,” she admitted. “You know my heart as well as I do, Adam, so I don’t have to explain why.” She drew in a bracing breath. “But I agreed to your terms—happily,” she emphasized, her voice breaking. “And I’m not wasting a single moment that I have left with you crying over the fact that you’re leaving. You’re here now,” she said. “And for now, that’s all that matters.”
“Are you sure?”
A sad smile touched her lips. “You know better than to even ask me that.”
He blew out a breath. “I actually thought I’d head over this morning and get everything put together.”
He had another errand too, one that he was desperately determined to see to now. He wanted to get her something, a small token of his gratitude. If she hadn’t barged into his bedroom two weeks ago, who knows what might have happened to him? Winnie had dragged him from the edge of the unknown and set him back on the path he was meant to tread.
She nodded once. “Okay. So you’ll be back later, then?”
“Most definitely. I’m yours until…”
Another sad grin. “Until you have to go,” she finished.
He nodded once more, dreading that moment more than he had anything else in his entire life.
WINNIE DROPPED ADAM off at his house and, with a sinking heart and the sound of the clock ticking loudly in her mind, reversed out of the drive and made her way back to her own little cottage.
Into her garage, specifically.
Though she’d taken Adam’s parking spot sign down when he’d gone away to college, she’d been unable to throw it into the trash. Too many hours spent agonizing over the paint and thinking about the girls he’d taken up to McKinney Point had made it nearly impossible to chuck into the garbage like any normal woman would have done.
But Winnie was not normal.
She’d been neurotically in love with the same guy for more than a decade. That feeling had never shaken, waned or wavered. Not once, in spite of the fact that he’d never returned those feelings.
Or at least he hadn’t…until now.
Winnie didn’t know what sort of change had come over Adam, didn’t know the exact moment when he’d fallen for her, too, but she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he had. She could read it in every look, feel it in every touch. She saw it when those wonderful eyes went soft and indulgent, felt it when he pressed an affectionate kiss to her cheek. The tender way he tugged her to him, the playful sling of his shoulders around hers. He was happy with her. Truly, genuinely happy.
And this wasn’t a product of wishful thinking or false hope.
Adam loved her.
Whether he knew it or not.
Thankfully, years of observing his behavior had served her in good stead. She knew the best possible thing she could do at the moment was simply be herself. To take what he was giving her.
Despite the excuse Adam maintained—the fact that he was leaving—Winnie knew something else was at play here. Things, she suspected, he hadn’t even admitted to himself. In many ways he was the same old Adam, the confident, irreverent, driven boy she’d fallen in love with long ago.
But in other ways—particularly since the accident—he was different.
There was a weariness around his eyes that never truly left, an occasional haunting expression when she wondered if he was reliving the horrific event. Adam was clinging to the life he’d had before almost too hard, as if the injury would swallow him whole if he made any concessions for it at all.
Admittedly this morning when he’d told her that he wouldn’t be returning to Bethel Bay after his meeting, she’d had a little meltdown. She’d thought that they’d have some time together before he actually left for Iraq. More time to work him around to her way of thinking, to convince him that he didn’t wa
nt to be without her.
No doubt Adam thought a clean break would be in both of their best interests—particularly hers—and that was more than likely the reasoning behind his decision to remain on base. She’d faltered when he’d told her because she’d counted on that additional time, had grown attached to it even, and didn’t want to miss a minute with him before he boarded a flight bound for the Middle East.
His change to her plans had thrown her into an emotional tailspin, and she’d suddenly found herself on the verge of breaking into tears, which would have been unacceptable behavior on her part. It would only serve to make him feel guiltier and all the more determined to go before doing her further damage.
Noble idiot, she thought, stashing the sign and a rubber mallet in the back of her SUV. She slid behind the wheel and made her way up to McKinney Point, found Adam’s old spot and replanted the sign.
Ah, Winnie thought, as the mallet swung limply from her hand. Now this is more like it. She’d suffered endless hours of agony wishing that he’d been up here with her, desperately hoping that she could be the girl in his arms, the girl who was helping him fog up the windows in his old Chevy.
Weekend after weekend, hour after hour, girl after girl.
A slither of satisfaction moved through her veins. It was her turn, by God, and she had every intention of taking it while she could. Furthermore, she was just competitive enough to want their time together up here to obliterate the memory of any other girl in his head.
And if she had to act like a bonafide tramp to make it happen, then she would.
Winnie was staking her claim.
He might be determined to leave her and never come back, but dammit, she was going to make it hard for him. Leaving her—leaving what they could be—would not be easy.
She wanted him to fight for her, to fight for them.
The fact that he could take his prosthesis off—an act that made him more vulnerable than anything else—and spend the night in her bed ought to tell him that he was safe with her. More specifically, that they were safe.
Last night when he’d settled onto the bed and started to remove his leg, she’d watched the anxiety race across his face—the barest hint of fear—and tried to imagine herself in his place. Tried to imagine the fear of needing to act in an instant, get up from bed…and realize that she couldn’t. The thought absolutely terrified her. Granted he could be into the leg in less than ten seconds, but that didn’t lessen the knowledge that he was completely vulnerable.