by Anil Chawla
The wedding at church was a novel experience for Kalpu. As she walked down the aisle in a flowing white gown, she felt like she was gliding on air. The ceremony was small, with only close friends and family present. Vinodbhai and Sadhanaben had taken a break from wedding preparations in India to be present at their daughter’s first wedding ceremony. Steve’s parents were there too.
Of course, since they hadn’t yet had their Hindu wedding, Kalpu and Steve couldn’t go for a honeymoon. Instead, they flew to India. Among their friends, Maria was the only one who could join them. Steve enjoyed the elaborate wedding preparations, assorted functions, singing and dancing, feasting, and being pampered by his in-laws.
During the marriage rituals, he asked Kalpu, ‘Do you know Sanskrit?’
When she said no, Steve laughed. ‘How do we know what we’re promising each other?’ he asked.
The priest got quite upset at all this talking and laughing, and gave them a stern look. The ceremony was followed by more dancing, singing, feasting, and general fun.
After their second wedding ceremony, they went to Goa for their honeymoon, where they did typical honeymoon things.
When they returned to Chicago, buying a house was their topmost priority. Both of them earned well, and easily found a roomy house in Naperville. There were open spaces in the front as well as the back. They liked to entertain guests and Steve loved barbecuing in the backyard. The house was close to a park, and they often went for walks.
Married life was quite good. Kalpu and Steve had to travel for work but they were always home during weekends. They came to know their neighbours, a nice American family with two-year-old twins, and a young couple of Mexican origin. Veronica and Miguel were fun-loving people and both couples started hanging out often.
A year passed. As she saw the twins next door growing up, Kalpu felt it was time for her to experience motherhood. She and Steve talked it over and decided to have a baby. Less than a year later, Neel was born. He had his mother’s sharp features and his father’s colour. As he grew older, it became clear that he had inherited two other traits from his parents: Steve’s height and Kalpu’s intelligence.
Kalpu had decided to hire a nanny to help with Neel’s care from the start. Their neighbours helped find Sofia. When Neel was born, Kalpu’s mother came over and spent three months with them to help with the baby. Then Sadhanaben returned to India and Kalpu had to go back to work, and Sofia took over. Kalpu and Steve changed their schedules as well. She went to work early in the morning and returned in the afternoon, whereas he went later and came back in the evening. They also reduced their travel and coordinated their plans to ensure that they didn’t end up being away at the same time. Her boss was happy to offer her this flexibility.
Sofia could speak a little English and mostly talked to Neel in Spanish. As he learned to speak, Neel picked up many Spanish words. Sofia was very caring and looked after Neel like her own child. When Neel was four, Sofia had to go back to Mexico over some immigration issues. Neel cried as if his own mother was leaving him, and Sofia was heartbroken too.
Kalpu moved steadily up the professional ladder, but Steve wasn’t doing so well. This gave him more time to spend with Neel, but she felt him slowly growing distant. She tried talking with him, but Steve had never been good at expressing his feelings. She guessed part of the reason for his change: she was now many levels senior to him at ElVeeDee. In a planned move to ease the situation between them, she changed jobs and joined a smaller company as their global head of marketing. This helped cut down her travel even further. But it did nothing to change Steve’s behaviour, and he continued to remain aloof. The only time he seemed genuinely happy was on weekends when he took Neel to the nearby park to teach him baseball.
In 2006, two of ElVeeDee’s blockbuster drugs, a statin and a beta-blocker, went off patent. Once the patents expired, generic drug manufacturers took a big chunk of the market share and ElVeeDee lost significant revenue. The company did not have enough new drugs in the pipeline to make up for the loss. Over the next few months, hundreds of employees were laid off—and Steve was one of them. After this, he withdrew even further, and became depressed.
Steve tried to find another job, but many pharma companies were in the same situation and there was a complete freeze on hiring. He began to drink heavily. Kalpu tried to comfort him, saying that they had no financial difficulties, the house was already paid for, there were enough savings in the bank, and she still had a good job. But it didn’t work. His behaviour became increasingly erratic. He went to bars and came back drunk late at night, often in a taxi as he was unable to drive. He stopped taking Neel to play baseball. On Maria’s advice, Kalpu tried marriage counselling, but Steve stopped going after the first two sessions. He also refused to seek medical help on his own.
Late one evening, Kalpu came home after a very stressful day, and found that Steve had still not returned. She tried calling him but he didn’t answer his phone. He came home after midnight, heavily drunk. When she tried speaking to him, he slapped her. That was the last straw. She told Steve to move out of the house. He had perhaps seen it coming, and moved out without any fuss.
‘Mommy!’
Neel’s voice broke into her reminiscences. He was too young to know what was going on, but he missed his daddy. To take his mind off things, Kalpu encouraged him to play with the twins next-door and his other playmates in the neighbourhood.
‘Do you have any homework? Do you need my help?’ she asked Neel.
‘No, Mommy. Can I watch cartoons? What’s for dinner?’ They decided to order pizza. After dinner, Neel once again asked Kalpu about Daddy. She consoled him and read to him his current favourite story, which was about a boy who learns that he is a wizard.
With Steve gone, Kalpu was feeling increasingly helpless and lonely. Although it had been more than a month since he’d moved out, she hadn’t contacted a lawyer to start divorce proceedings. She really wanted to talk to someone but could think of no one other than Maria. Maria was a great shoulder to cry on, but had never been married and didn’t know what advice to give her.
The next day was Sunday. Making her morning coffee, she remembered how Steve used to take them all to a place of worship every other Sunday. Sometimes it was the neighbourhood church, at others, the nearby temple. She had always found the church to be calmer than the temple. Over the last decade, more Indian families had moved to the area, mainly because of the outsourcing boom in India. Most of the new Indian community didn’t seem keen on mixing with anyone else. When they went to the temple, Steve’s presence attracted odd glances. So they preferred to go to church.
Father Joseph of their neighbourhood church was a very open-minded person who welcomed people of all faiths. His Sunday sermons were well-regarded in the community, and his church was full most Sundays. Kalpu had also found his sermons to be of great depth and derived comfort from them. After his sermons, Father Joseph would meet people, listen to their problems and give advice. She decided to visit the church and talk to him. Neel had been invited to play with the twins. She took him to the International House of Pancakes nearby for breakfast and then dropped him off before going to church.
When she arrived, Father Joseph was already halfway through his sermon. She listened quietly and prayed for her problems to get sorted out. Once the sermon was over, a small crowd gathered around Father Joseph, eager to talk to him. She stood to a side. He noticed the unrest on her face and asked her, ‘Beti, what’s wrong?’ Living near a large Indian community, he had picked up a few Hindi words.
‘Father, can I talk to you in private for a few minutes?’
‘Sure, beti. Let’s go to my office.’ Once there, she briefly explained the situation with Steve and the hopelessness she was facing.
‘Have you talked to Steve recently?’
‘No, Father. I can feel Steve’s dejection but I can’t understand why he’s refusing counselling. And why is he not talking to me?’
‘Steve pro
bably feels equally lost and helpless. Go and talk to him. It’s been more than a month; he has also had time to think. Steve is a good soul. He will turn around, and God will solve all your problems.’
As she was leaving the office, he asked, ‘Beti, when did you last go to India?’
‘It’s been three years,’ she said. Once Neel was old enough to go on holiday and have a say about the destination, he generally chose places like Disneyland rather than India. Work pressure did not let her take more than one holiday a year.
‘You should probably take Steve to India. A change of location, and connecting with Indian family values might do him good,’ Father Joseph said.
Kalpu decided to visit Steve at his motel room the same day. As she knocked on the door, she worried that he might be drunk, but instead found him doing yoga. He seemed sad but calm. Looking at him, she was overwhelmed by emotion and started crying. Steve came forward and embraced her.
‘Please come back home,’ she said against his chest. ‘Neel misses you and so do I.’ They talked for a long while.
After Steve came back home, Neel’s mood changed for the better. He finished all his summer projects in five days. Kalpu’s mother back home was so relieved by the news of Steve’s return that she choked up on the phone. One week later, Kalpu, Steve, and Neel boarded a flight to Delhi. They had decided to stop at Delhi for a couple of days and visit Agra to see the Taj Mahal before taking a flight to Ahmedabad.
The time in Delhi and Agra was well spent. Kalpu had been to the Taj Mahal when she was young, but neither Steve nor Neel had seen it before. Despite the heat and humidity of north India’s August, for the first time in two years, they felt like a family travelling together. After a day of sightseeing in Delhi, they flew to Ahmedabad. Kalpu’s brother, Arnav, his wife, Shilpi and their ten-year-old daughter Sachi came to receive them at the airport. Arnav and his family had visited them in Chicago. Kalpu, Steve, and Neel had also stayed at Arnav’s place on their visit to India three years ago. They communicated often by email and phone and, overall, everybody knew everybody reasonably well. The next two weeks in Ahmedabad just whizzed past. They visited friends, family, and some of their favourite places from the old days. To Kalpu’s surprise, Steve went to the ISKCON temple several times and spent quite a bit of time there.
All good things come to an end. Before they knew it, the eve of their departure was upon them. Kalpu had taken great pains in packing their bags, six altogether. The bags came to India light, but all the stuff they’d bought and all the home-made preserves Sadhanaben and Shilpi had given her quickly filled them up. She knew there was a good chance that customs in Chicago would throw away much of the stuff, but she didn’t want to offend them by refusing their gifts. Back in their room after a late dinner, Steve asked her, ‘Can we speak for a few minutes?’ Something about his look and tone alarmed Kalpu.
‘Kalpu, I want to stay back here in ISKCON for a few months.’
Rewind_Rendezvous@Nine
Venue: Hotel Beach Resort Residency, Goa
15 October 1997. It was a pleasant Saturday morning in Goa. Sri had gotten up at five o’clock as usual, changed into a tracksuit, and gone out for a walk on the beach. The early morning breeze was as refreshing as it could get. He’d arrived in Goa the night before. Pantu had masterminded the Pandavas’ third Rewind_Rendezvous. By now, he was quite well established in the IT space with his fingers in different pies—hardware import, body shopping, and the emerging software business. The Pandavas hadn’t met in years. The previous meet—in 1992—felt like the long distant past.
All their best efforts and a series of important happenings notwithstanding, chance had simply not let them come together in one place.
Goky and Varsha had married two years previously, but three of his friends could not attend the wedding; Sammy was busy with his own wedding with Roma and their subsequent move to the US, Kalpu’s brother too, was having an elaborate wedding around the same time, and Sri had to attend to his ailing father in Vijayawada. Pantu was the only Pandava who’d managed to attend both Goky and Sammy’s weddings, bringing Bubbly along. None of them had made it to his own big fat Punjabi wedding a year before that, and Pantu made sure both his friends got a serious verbal firing before they could become grooms.
Sri heard a scooty’s horn behind him and moved aside to give way, but the honking continued. Just as he turned around angrily to face the offender, the scooty came to halt with its front wheel almost between his legs. He screamed for his life, jumped to a side and turned back, fuming. A helmet covered the rider’s face but it took Sri just a fraction of second to recognize Kalpu. Then two more scooties arrived, one carrying Pantu and a woman who turned out to be Varsha, the other, Sammy and Goky. They’d all arrived in the middle of the night and reached the resort while Sri was asleep. Kalpu had brought Maria along. Roma and Maria were resting at the hotel but the others had decided to look for Sri.
Kalpu took off her helmet and asked Sri, ‘So, Professor, do you want a ride?’
This triggered a riot of laughter as the Pandavas recollected how Kalpu had given Sri the ride of his life on her Bullet many years ago. Varsha kept asking them what the joke was but it took a while for the laughter to stop and the story to be told.
The sun was emerging on the horizon and its reflected rays painted the ocean beautiful colours. The riders got off their machines, took their helmets off, and looked at each other fondly. After a few moments, they all came together and hugged. Varsha quickly brought out her camera and took some pictures. When the hugging just went on and on, she jokingly complained, ‘I’m feeling so left out! Old friends meeting and hugging each other and not even looking at me!’
Pantu broke free from the gang and pulled Varsha into the circle. They enjoyed the spectacle of the rising sun for some time and then stopped by a roadside shop for a cup of tea, although Pantu was very keen to try Goa’s famous feni even this early in the morning. It was around eight o’clock when they decided to head back to the resort. Kalpu, while warning Sri that she had been on a flight for more than twenty-four hours, urged him to be her pillion and hold her tight, which he did.
Bubbly and Roma had heard so many stories about the quintet from their husbands that they were waiting for the famous Pandavas to arrive.
There were several more rounds of hugging and laughing once everyone got together. Pantu had been looking around thoughtfully, and said, ‘There is only one thing missing.’ And then, looking at Sri and Kalpu, he told them, ‘Why don’t you get into a maitree karar?’
It took Kalpu some effort to explain the term to others. Maitree karar is a mutual agreement between a man and women to stay together, not necessarily through the institution of marriage.
Sri looked sheepish, but Kalpu unabashedly said, ‘Interesting thought!’
Somehow, no one laughed.
Jet lag was hitting the overseas travellers and the others were also tired, having been awake the whole night. They decided to retire to bed.
At lunchtime, everybody gathered to enjoy the resort’s special buffet lunch. Maria was the only person who hadn’t met the others yet. Kalpu introduced everyone to her one by one, but Maria couldn’t keep track of all the names and relationships. Pantu suggested a way out and asked all the couples to stand together: Pantu–Bubbly, Goky–Varsha, Sammy–Roma, with Sri and Kalpu on two corners. Maria was quite amused at this approach.
Kalpu introduced Maria as her friend, philosopher and guide in the US, her go-to person, and a great colleague. Maria was warmly welcomed by all.
In the lunch queue, Pantu whispered in Bubbly’s ear, ‘Now I understand why Kalpu is blind to Sri’s feelings.’
Bubbly looked confused as she knew nothing about the existence of any such feelings.
With a big wink, Pantu went on, ‘Maria is the culprit. I suspect there’s something between Kalpu and Maria.’ Bubbly exploded at Pantu and he didn’t utter a single word for some time.
After lunch, they decided to r
elax in the sea-facing lounge and relive life since their last meeting.
Sammy was doing extremely well at SVT and life was exciting. Roma sat with an arm around him, looking fondly at her husband. Goky had become busier and busier as he moved up the ladder. Varsha added her tidbits to Goky’s narration, and confessed that he spent less and less time with her. Bubbly had the same complaint but the moment she said this, Pantu pulled her into his arms and assured her that she was the only one in the world for whom he had time. Kalpu talked candidly about her adventures in the US and her enjoyment of the American lifestyle. Sri spoke of his Ph.D. programme and his educational experiments at LEC Trichy.
After some time, Roma, Bubbly, Varsha, and Maria felt their interest wane. They decided to explore a few sights around their resort. The Pandavas continued reminiscing.
Pantu had planned meticulously for the evening. They reassembled after freshening up to find the lounge bedecked with flowers and lights. A variety of Indian and international dishes had been placed on some tables. A small but well-stocked bar had been set up on one side. Needless to say, Pantu was the first to hit the bar with a patiala peg. Sammy and Goky joined him. Kalpu got a glass of red wine, Roma chose white. Maria was curious about the patiala peg and adventurously ordered one. Sri and Varsha asked for juice. When Pantu saw his wife idling around, he said loudly, ‘Bubbly darling, why are you feeling shy? Come here and let me fix a scotch for you, in a glassful of ice cubes.’ Bubbly blushed, but looking at the free and relaxed atmosphere, joined them with a loud ‘cheers’.