by Erin Trejo
Walking back down the hallway I take it all in. I already know I’m about to blow this motherfucker to pieces as soon as we have the all clear. I can only hope that these girls will see it as a new start. A chapter closed in their book of life. It’s time to start over and live.
“How many we round up?” Looking at Torch as I walk outside and light up a cigarette, he smiles.
“Twenty six brother. They said that’s all that’s left of them.” Scrubbing a hand over my face, my heart drops. That means there were more. We missed the fucking time line to get them out. Rage simmers just below the surface of my skin.
“Hey, that’s a good number Ryker.” With a quick nod, I motion for Rob.
“Move them to the van. Cover your ass.” Rob nods as he starts rounding the girls up. A few of the others follow behind him, but I set my sights on the Dusts’ across the lot. The shots have stopped which only worries me slightly. I know Creed and Tank are careful with what they do.
“Let’s go get ready to play light the night.” Chuckling, I make my way toward the rusty shack they use as a secondary club house when I see Tank.
“Everybody good?” His eyes dart to mine before he nods.
“Yeah, but there’s a situation. Your boy Bone is in there.” Nodding toward the building I make my way over there. No one will be taking him out. He has laid his ass on the line for all of us for far too long. Walking in I see death all around me. Not all of them are dead, but a lot of them are. It almost brings a smile to my morbid face.
“Thing is; your boy isn’t doin’ so good.” Creed looks at me as I make my way toward him. I know that look. He isn’t good,, he’s dying.
“Where is he?” I know how this scenario plays out. I don’t like it at all but I know it needs to be me. Creed directs me to a backroom where one of the other guys stands.
“Get out.” Growling at him, he quickly leaves the doorway he was standing guard at. I take a deep breath before pushing through the door. I never expected this. I never thought I’d see him this way. Bone is on the bed, bloody and broken. He looks like he should already be dead but I can tell by the cuts they made on him, they wanted this to be long, and drawn out. My hands clench at my sides as I walk up next to the bed.
“Goddamn brother.” He’s barely breathing from what I can see. He isn’t good at all.
“Ryker. I tried brother. I tried.” In the weakest voice I think I’ve ever heard, he tries to speak to me.
“I know you did. You chanced a lot on this brother. I just don’t know what to do now.” His eyes barely open as he looks over at me. I can see the look, but hell help me, I don’t want to do it. I don’t know that my head would ever be right if I do. Shaking my head, Bone can see the look on my face before he grabs my hand. SHIT! I can’t handle this.
“I’m gone brother. Just finish it, yeah?” Shaking my head, I can’t force myself to look at him. I can’t see the pain and pleading in them.
“Ryker. You’re the only one I want to finish it brother. It would be an honor. Don’t leave me like a fuckin’ dog.” I look down at the person that risked his life, to give those girls theirs back. The man that is lying here bleeding to death to make sure they didn’t suffer the same fate. How the hell could I walk away and leave him like that.
“You know you’re a good man Bone. I never doubted that.” Bone tries to nod his head but he can barely move. It kills a piece of me to see this.
“You too, brother.” The words barely leave his mouth as I pull my gun out of the back of my jeans. Placing it to his forehead, he gives a slight nod before closing his eyes.
Chapter 42
I lie here in the apartment with tears rolling down my face. I don’t know if it’s because I miss Jersey so damn much, or the fact that I put my best friend out of his misery tonight. A man that risked his ass for the sake of girls he didn’t even know. To all those motherfuckers that say time heals, it’s all a fucking lie. Time has done nothing but make my heart feel like a lead weight in my chest. It gets heavier and heavier every day. I never knew missing someone could take its toll on me the way not having Jersey has.
We’ve searched and put out calls. Nothing comes back to her. Shifter’s have moved from their old locations and clubhouse to God only fucking knows where, taking my world with them. I don’t know if I will ever see my wife or child again. It all slams into me every single day. I try to hold back as much as I can, but there is so much heartache in there. It’s been almost four months now. I never give up though. She’s out there somewhere and any day now she will be having our baby. My baby. I can’t think negatively because that’s all I want anymore. I want them both back in my arms.
I sit up and look at the furniture I bought and set up in the room. A crib, dresser, clothes. I have everything with the help of Bella, Jada and Cher. Who knew those girls would get so excited? Bella has been a light in all this darkness. Even though she fights her own battles, she never once said no to helping me. She has been around almost every day.
I can’t function these days. I can’t focus on shit either. My mind whirls as I try to come up with new plans and ways to find out where the hell the Shifters’ have her. I know she’s out there. It’s like I can feel her presence out there somewhere. It’s calling to me, and I want to answer.
Standing up I look at all the little clothes that are folded neatly in the drawers. I want my baby home. I want to be the father I never really had. I want to be the man that Jersey and my child needs. The provider, the keeper. I want to be their world.
Grabbing my cut, I make my way toward the door knowing that I need to get the hell out of this apartment before I lose my mind completely. I have barely been around the club, but it’s just too hard to look at them there. I can’t see the girls with their kids so happy and smiling. It eats at me to know that mine is out there somewhere waiting for me, and I can’t do shit about it. Walking out the front door, I spot my neighbor Steve. I haven’t talked to him either.
“Hey man.” Steve turns to look at me.
“How you been brother?” Steve shrugs as I walk over toward him.
“Just trying to live. How’s everything?” Shaking my head, I don’t know how to answer that. I don’t know how everything is.
“I’m not sure brother. My life is a fuckin’ mess right now.” Steve sighs like he understands. He doesn’t, not even close.
“I heard about your girl. I’m sorry man. If I hear anything I’ll let you know.” With a quick nod, I don’t want to rehash this shit again. I quickly turn around and make my way back to my bike. Climbing on I’m overwhelmed with grief. I know I need to get my ass back to the clubhouse, but this shit isn’t working out for me. The fact remains I lost her, my baby, and I was forced to take my friends life. What does that make me? At the end of the day what kind of person am I? Driving back to the club it’s with a heavy heart. As soon as I pull into the parking lot my phone rings.
“Yeah?” I cut the engine and pull my helmet off as I bring the phone to my ear.
“You comin’ back to the world of the livin’ motherfucker?” Piper’s old ass voice booms through the phone making me laugh.
“I’m in the goddamn parkin’ lot asshole.” The slight chuckle leaves my throat before I can stop it.
“Oh thank shit! Get the fuck in here.” Piper hangs up as I shake my head. I make my way toward the door in a fog. I don’t know how I feel about coming in here right now.
Stepping inside, my heart flips in my chest. Everything that I’ve tried to stay away from slams back into me. My past, my present, and my goddamn future. I don’t know how this is going to work out.
“Good news motherfucker.” Creed comes at me smiling like he’s won the lottery. Crazy son of a bitch has lost his mind.
“Oh yeah? What is it?” Tank comes out of the office smiling too. Hell, if both these motherfuckers are smiling there has to be some kind of good news.
“We got a hit on Shifters’.” Waving his phone in the air, I shake my head.
“We got word on Shifters’. They were last seen over in Wolves’ territory. They had a very pregnant girl with them.” Everything else fades out. All I can hear is that she’s alive. She’s still alive. My stomach swims with the news that her and the baby are alive. I don’t give a shit about anything else that he has to say.
“Where the fuck are they?”
Chapter 43
My heart slams in my chest as I run my hand through my hair. She’s ok. The baby is ok. That’s all I can keep thinking to myself. Now I need to know where the fuck they have her, and put a plan of action into motion. I want to make every motherfucker that had anything to do with her being taken to suffer at my hands, I want blood.
“Calm down brother. We talked about this.” Nodding my head, I already know this. I’m going to be calm, and try to be level headed about this.
“We know they have her. We know the Wolves’ are backin’ them. Why, we don’t know. I have eyes on them. Boys up north have that covered. As long as they stay there we will move on them in a few days.” Creed’s eyes land on mine as if to ask permission. I already know he has final say so my opinion means shit right now.
“This is good news. We know she’s ok.” I can’t say that I disagree. It is good news that we know she’s alive and the baby is ok, but what has been done to her is still unknown.
Jersey came a long way from the hell she lived in before. She was used to being abused, but she never let that keep her down. She rose up and became stronger from all the shit that she lived through. She made herself into a better person, my person. Grabbing a beer off the bar I take a drink before I light up a cigarette.
“We will get her back.” Piper slaps my shoulder as I nod. I don’t need the reassurance from them, I already know I’ll get my family back. I never thought that I’d say that, but here I am saying, my family.
“I know. I’m bringin’ my family home brother.” Piper smiles over at me as I shake my head and smile.
“Don’t underestimate me Piper.” His laughter fills the room. I can’t stop myself from laughing with him.
“I never underestimate any of you. I see the power in your eyes, Ryker. You don’t always know it’s inside of you but I see it.” Piper turns and walks away before Cher sits down.
“You good? Ready to be a daddy soon?” Her bright eyes shine as she smiles at me. I have to say that Cher has been the calmest of all of the ladies about this shit. I don’t know how she does it, but I love it.
“You’re damn right I am. I’ve had enough practice with the kids around here. Shit, I’m 34 years old, it’s about damn time.” I smile over at Cher as she narrows her eyes at me.
“When was your birthday?” I knew she would catch that shit.
“A few days ago. I didn’t celebrate. Not without Jersey. It didn’t feel right.” Cher nods her head knowing exactly what I meant.
“What are you hoping for? Boy or girl?” There’s a question that I haven’t thought about. In all honesty what man doesn’t want a son? But then again who wouldn’t want a little princess that hangs off her daddy?
“Both! Shit, I was hopin’ for twins! Really though, I don’t care either way. I can always make more, yeah?” Cher giggles and it reminds me of Jersey. Hell, everything does these days.
“You think so, but I bet Jersey has other ideas about that.” Glancing over at her, I smile.
“That girl loves me. If I tell her I want a million babies she’ll give them to me.” Cher slaps me making me chuckle. I feel slightly better as I sit here joking around with Cher. I think the knowing that Jersey is ok and alive has set me a little at ease.
“You show that baby off and she’ll have a million. Tank is the same way. He said he wants more kids too. I don’t know about all that.” Cher giggles wrapping her arms around herself.
“You know you’re a great mother. Don’t doubt that, Cher. I see the way you are with Griff and Bella. You’ve taken a big fuckin’ step takin on a teenager. You should be proud of yourself.” Cher’s little cheeks turn red as I reach over and pull her to me. Hugging her she looks up at me.
“You’ll be a great dad, too.” With a quick nod, Tank walks over.
“Get off my woman!” With his cocky ass voice, I look over before letting go of Cher. I can’t stop the smile that crosses my face when I see him with Griff. He’s such a good dad.
“You know she likes me, Tank. Can’t help that.” Shrugging I tickle Griff’s little belly.
“You think everybody likes you, motherfucker. I’m glad to see you smilin’ yeah?” I nod my head because it actually feels good to be smiling. I know in my heart that this is going to work out for the best.
Chapter 44
I woke up extra early this morning. Surprisingly I am ready to start this day. I have a fucking plan in mind and I need to set it in motion before I bring Jersey home. I came into the club to find everyone in bed, except Bella. I stand in the bathroom holding her hair back while the poor girl throws up.
“You sure I can’t take you somewhere darlin’?” Bella shakes her head, but this is ripping my heart apart seeing her like this. I wish there was something more that I could do for her.
“I knew not to eat this early. It always makes me sick. I’ll be fine.” Letting go of her hair, I walk to the sink and grab a rag. Wetting it, I reach down and wipe her face before she looks up smiling.
“You need a daughter. You’ll be a great dad.” Wiping her face once more, I extend my hand helping her up.
“Why don’t you talk to your dad about this Bella?” Her eyes dart to mine before she shakes her head and looks away. Leaning over the sink she rinses her mouth before grabbing the towel again.
“I won’t do it Ryker. I told you, he needs to enjoy his life. I want to do the same. Everyone except you, would treat me like I’m already dead. Fuck that.” Bella’s eyes are so bright even with all she’s dealing with. She amazes me every day that I see her go on like there’s nothing wrong. She makes me look like a fucking bitch for moping around the way I do.
“What are you doing here so damn early anyway?” We walk out of the bathroom and toward the kitchen before I answer her.
“I need a favor. I’ve been thinkin’ about some shit.” Bella pours a glass of juice before she turns to look at me.
“Oh hell, should I be scared?” Her little giggle makes me smile. God, I hate that she’s going through all this shit. I hate it even more that there’s nothing I can do about it.
“Maybe! No, I want to have a real weddin’ for Jersey when she gets back. I know that’s somethin’ she was really lookin’ forward to. I couldn’t give it to her before, but I can now. Plus, I bought a ring.” Bella jumps up and down almost spilling her juice before she sets it on the counter. Before I know what the hell is going on she throws herself into my arms.
“I always knew you had it in you, Ryker.” I spin her around a little before I set her back on her feet.
“Does that mean you’ll help me?” Rolling her eyes, she puts her hands on her hips.
“That is the stupidest thing you have ever said. Of course I’ll help, but I want to see that ring.” Chuckling, I reach in my pocket and pull out the ring I bought the other day. I knew I wanted to get her one but this is a better idea. Remarry my wife.
“Oh my God, Ryker!” Bella squeals when the kitchen doors fly open. Piper walks in scrubbing his hand over his face as he yawns.
“The fuck is goin’ on in here?” He looks between the two of us before I glance at Bella. We both break into laughter as we look back at the shirtless Piper. He isn’t a small guy, at least not anymore. His tattoos are all stretched out with his old wrinkly skin.
“What the fuck is that? It looks like a dick Piper.” Pointing at something on his stomach, I’m not sure what the hell it’s supposed to be. Bella laughs hysterically next to me.
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“That’s a dagger, motherfucker.” Glancing at Bella we both lose it. I can’t help it. That shit isn’t a damn dagger, at least not anymore.
“That’s a dick and balls Piper! Don’t you wear shirts to bed?” Bella can barely stand up she’s laughing so hard. I chuckle along with her as Piper turns to leave the kitchen with his finger in the air.
“Don’t leave Piper! We all love dicks and balls in here!” Bella grabs her stomach as she bends over laughing her ass of and I can’t help but follow along. She is funny as hell when she wants to be.
“Oh hell, Bella. I almost pissed myself.” Bella stands up with a red face trying to catch her breath before she lays her head on my chest.
“Oh God, Ryker. I don’t think I’ve laughed that hard in a long fucking time. It feels good.” Wrapping my arm around her I kiss the top of her head. I’m going to miss this shit with her.
“It does doesn’t it. Thanks for that sweetheart. I really think I needed that, too.”
Chapter 45
“Ryker, do you like these flowers?” Bella wanders around the store like she has lost her mind. I told her we can’t keep buying live flowers. We aren’t sure how long this is going to take us and I don’t know what condition Jersey is going to be in.
“I like those, but I told you that we can’t keep getting them.” Bella throws a flower at me making me laugh.
“I didn’t ask you that. Besides, I’m like the fucking flower whisperer, I can keep this shit alive, no problem.” My stomach is in knots as I think about tomorrow. I know I’m ready to have her home but I’m still scared shitless that something could go wrong. I can’t have anything happen to her, or the baby, it would kill me.
“What about cakes? We can store it in the fridge downstairs. It will stay just fine.” Bella walks through the store piling flowers up on the counter.