by J. L. Beck
“Truth? You want the truth, Maggie?” I growled the words, slamming her small frame against one of the walls. I didn’t care if anyone that anyone could come down the hall and see us. Nothing else mattered in this moment but her and the unsaid words between us.
She nodded her head yes, her eyes roaming over my face as if she wasn’t sure she could speak the words out loud.
“The truth is, I knew. I’ve known for a fucking while…” I laid a kiss against her throat, listening to her heart beat under my lips. “I didn’t say shit about Ty to you because he was my problem and he still is….” I trailed my lips down her throat, listening to her sigh into my touch.
“But the truth is, I don’t really give a rat’s ass that I lied to you because the reason I did is the only important thing.” I pulled away, watching the softness in her features turn hard. Her brows knitted together, her eyes grew darker and I could feel her small fists clenching at her sides. She was angry and on the verge of attacking me.
Let her. Make her draw your blood. Feed off her rage as she feeds off yours. The monster inside of continued to instruct me.
I released the hold I had on the back of her neck and gripped her chin between my fingers. There was so much intensity in those beautiful eyes of her. She had seen the good, the bad, and even the ugly inside of me now she needed to see the best side of me, the side that was designated just for her.
“The most important thing is you. Nothing will matter more than you. If lying to you protects you then I will always choose to protect you. You’re everything, my breath of fresh air, the reason my blood pumps. You’re mine, even when I deserve absolutely nothing, even when I don’t deserve you.” My eyes were fixated on hers and I witnessed the resolve in hers almost immediately. She believed me, and that was the thing about Maggie. The thing that made her the most appealing to me, she believed me, despite the evilness that raged just below the surface.
“You kept it from me, Killer. You made me believe you knew nothing, when all along you were harboring secrets.” I could feel the hurt in her words, her voice. It broke my heart and made my blood boil.
“I did what was needed to protect you!” I seethed. I couldn’t let her emotions get to me. I was in the right, and I would show her I was. I would prove the good in what I had done.
“You did what you thought was right. You did what YOU wanted.” She enunciated the you in her sentence, unclenched her hand and hit me in the chest directly over my heart with her small fist. The hit didn’t hurt, not nearly as bad as the words she had said.
“Again, you made a decision that wasn’t yours to make.” The sadness she had showed just moments later dissolved and in its place rage and fury came. I craved it though, the darkness in her drew me in wrapping me in a coldness that my body welcomed.
“You’re mine. The choice was mine and I know it was the right one. I love you, Maggie and I protect what’s mine. Always.” I spoke firmly, placing my lips against her soft ones. Her protests were muffled under the press of my lips to hers. Her body grew soft and her sex seeped a pheromone into the air that almost made it worth fucking her right here in the hall.
“Killer…” She sighed into the air as I lifted her up and gripped her tightly against my chest, wrapping her legs around my waist and pressing my cock into the soft center of her thighs.
“I’m going to fuck you, Maggie and when I’m done you’ll understand just how much you mean to me.” My voice fading to the animal that I was underneath it all.
Ten
Maggie
“Fuck me…” I panted as he navigated the hallway, carrying me in his arms. Thoughts of Ty and the secrets that had been exposed fell to on the back burner. All that mattered now was being as close as humanly possible to Killer.
“Shhh, baby.” Killer purred in my ear, his hands gripping my ass firmly as he massaged it. I could feel his grip work upwards towards my lower back . I could hear his gruff laugh as I tried to widen my legs so he could touch more of me.
“I want you. I’ve begged and dreamt of this day forever.” I confessed out loud, not even caring that it was a thought I had never shared with him. Killer’s steps echoed down the hall as he headed towards our room. My belly filled with butterflies and my pussy clenched in anticipation.
“I won’t lie and say I will be gentle because I’m not sure I can be,” Killer spoke as soon as we stopped in front of the door to our room. The door swung open behind us and with a soft push, we were in the room. Heat pooled between my legs, as I gripped my hands behind his neck, pulling his face down to mine. I pressed my lips against his as hard as I could, forcing all my anger into that one kiss and he gave it back to me with just as much pain.
Anger and sex swirled around us, covering us in a blanket of emotions that neither of us understood.
“I don’t want gentle, Killer. I just want you.” I whispered, pressing my forehead against his as he closed the door behind us. A moment passed between us, a moment of forgiveness, or maybe it was just passion, but it was a moment. We stared into one another’s eyes, letting what was about to happen wash over us.
He was my damnation. When I died it wouldn’t be because of a careless sin, it would be because I loved him too much.
When the unsaid words floated away and evaporated into the air, our hands started to move, carving out the rivets and contours of our bodies that we each wanted to discover. I slipped from his hold and down his body, my hands rubbing over all the hard planes of his chest, shoulders, and back. I felt as if I was mapping him out, trying to see if there was a piece of him I had yet to explore. Things were different now, sex with him would be rougher and darker than it had been before.
There would be no comparison to the man he was now and the man he was then. We both stayed silent as his shirt was ripped from his body, mine following suit until we both stood before one another completely bare and exposed. I stared at him for a long time, at the muscles in his chest, and the very place where there should’ve been a scar or something from the port that had been placed in him when he had cancer. Instead, there was nothing there that showed the damage of his previous life.
The trickling of a memory was right on the edge of surfacing.
“You’re beautiful. Amazing. Far more than some monster like me should be given and way more angelic than you will ever believe.” Killer whispered, wrapping a piece of hair around one of his fingers and pulling me further away from that memory. My eyes trailed down over his stomach, which was smooth and hard at the same time. The man had the body of an athlete that worked out every single day, muscles tight and ridged. I bit the inside of my cheek, forcing a moan away.
“When I see you, as I do now, I see you for who you are. Not the person you were before, or the person you are now, but the person you are in here.” I pressed my hand over his heart where the steady beat radiated into my own soul. I could see tears forming in his eyes and I didn’t want the strong man he was to cry. He didn’t need to give me those tears, we both had shed far too many for each other.
Lifting my hand, I trailed my fingers over his muscles watching them clench at my touch.
“Keep touching me like that Maggie and I’ll flip you over this bed right fucking now and take you from behind like the animal I truly am.” The growl in his voice did nothing but turn me on more. That’s why when he gripped me by the hips and picked me up placing me on the bed I didn’t object. Neither did I when he pressed a hand against my abdomen and placed his head between my thighs. I knew he could see my juices glistening, the smell of my desires wrapping around us in the air.
With nothing more than a smile, he sank deep into my pussy, his tongue sucking up all my goodness. My hands flung up and into his hair as I moaned deeply, the entire room echoing with the noise.
“I want to hear you more than anything…” He growled and I swear to God I came right then all over his face. My muscles clenched together and my insides soared. I was floating and time was moving so very slow. I could feel every
single flick of his tongue, the stubble on his chin, and the way he gripped my skin as if he wished he could be one with it. Like there was too much still between us even after all our clothes had been removed.
“Killer!” I screamed his name and then silenced myself right after by biting down on my bottom lip as hard as I could. The copper taste of blood-making things that much more erotic. I lifted my head off the bed and leaned forward on my arms, watching him lap up my orgasm. The look in his eyes as he sucked, as he lifted my hips for his own pleasure, I took it in. He devoured me in the darkest, most intimate way. I was broken open, ripped straight down the middle for him. Exposed in ways I had never been before.
“You’re more than ready for me…” His voice was rough, almost pained as he slipped two fingers deep inside of me. As he did so, all thought flew out the window. My arms gave out and I fell back against the bed, my back arching into every stroke he gave me. I was right on the verge of coming again when he pulled his hand away, his mouth nipping at one of my nipples. Pleasure, that bordered on the line of pain consumed me. I was rubbed raw, a clean slate now that Killer had gotten to me.
“I want you. I need you. I need more.” I begged, my eyes holding his as he released my nipple with a pop only to nip at it again, his teeth grazing over it causing goose bumps to cover my skin.
My body burned with need as he continued to nip at each breast, switching between the two as he watched me with mesmerized eyes. It was in that stare, the intimate feeling between us, the lack of any words that pushed me to my second orgasm. The walls of my pussy tightened around him and relief flooded me as I rode out the small waves of euphoria that filled my body.
Exhaustion started to take hold as Killer adjusted me, gripping my hips in his hands and pulling me up off the bed a little bit. I withered beneath him still coming off my high. I couldn’t take my eyes off his cock as he gripped it with his hand, stroking it roughly and fluidly as he placed it at my entrance. He smirked a cocky grin as he noticed where my gaze was.
“Like what you see?” He laughed softly, something I had never heard before. I couldn’t even speak because just as I was about to respond he entered me with one push. My back bowed off the bed and my fingernails dug into the skin of his arms. His pulse was beating loudly against my ear as he held himself up and over me, the muscles in his arms, shoulders, and chest taut and tense as he waited for me.
It was then that I realized I needed to tell him it was okay to go on, that I was good and ready for him. Gripping him by the back of his head with one hand I stared into his dark blue eyes, the raging monster I craved on the verge of breaking free.
“Fuck me, Killer. Fuck me like there is no tomorrow and tonight was our last chance. Fuck me like you love me.” I held him there, our foreheads against one another, sweat covering our bodies as the room grew hotter with every passing second. The moment the energy in the room changed, I knew it because it grew darker like a thunderstorm that was brewing.
Killer thrust upwards and deep inside of me, his cock pressing off my back wall. Pleasure racked my body like I had never felt before. My legs shook and my fingers tingled with intense waves as my body started to build up in preparation for another climax. Every single part of me was in tune with Killer. His strokes matched my own, his fingers sank into my skin just enough to remind me how closely connected we truly were to one another. I pressed into him more, wanting and needing every single ounce of him until there was nothing more for him to give me.
“It’s always been you, since the moment I laid eyes on you that day on the bus.” His lips possessed mine, his tongue entering my mouth wildly while his cock slipped in and out of me at a high-intensity rate. Our slaps filled the room and my moans sounded right after them.
“I’m going to come…” I could barely speak or comprehend anything outside of Killer and I and this bed.
“Ride it out, baby… I’m almost there…” Killer groaned into my ear, sinking his teeth into the pulse at my throat. My clit throbbed and my body ached all over as he continued to slide into me, working me through my climax and the start of another. It was then that I felt the tightening of his muscles and felt his pace quicken. He pulled my back up off the bed and slammed into me so hard that if he hadn’t been holding me in place I would’ve hit the headboard. Growls filled the room along with our heavy pants and just as I was about to tell him I couldn’t take it anymore, I fell off that cliff again, this time, the orgasm lasted for what seemed to be an eternity. All I could see was Killer. All I could feel was Killer, the tight push of his cock inside of me, his fingers which left indentions on my skin, and the hot streaks of cum that he was now filling my pussy with.
“Fuck! You feel so good.” He moaned, slamming one of his fists down right next to my head. Aggression and rage showed in his emotions as he came, hard and feral like.
We clung to each other letting everything that we had just done sink in. Closing my eyes as we relaxed into the bed, I realized just how much I loved Killer, and what I would have to do could possibly be the end of him.
The end of us.
Eleven
Killer
“I broke my rules for you…” I breathed into her hair, the sun shining down on us through the open window in her bedroom. I had fallen for her in the worst way, a way that left me craving for her touch long before she was even gone. I wished I could slow time down, the cancer surging through my veins, the deathly outcome that was lingering at the end of every passing day.
The truth was, I was dying and I had already come to that conclusion. Still, I had never wanted to fight against the cancer until I felt Maggie’s love. Until she wrapped her small form around me and claimed my heart as hers, until she shoved the hate and anger away and took its place.
Her form lay against my chest, her breath against my cheek. I allowed the feeling of her against my skin to sink in, relishing in the feelings for as long as I could truly allow. The memory had hit me at full force, reminding me of the past I had tried so hard to fight against. It was pointless because look at us now.
Look at how much things had changed, but still stayed the same. Maggie was still out of reach, I thought to myself as I skimmed my fingers down her arm, her silky smooth skin causing my cock to grow hard again.
There was nothing on Maggie that wasn’t perfect, that wasn’t made for me. Still, I reminded myself of how different we were, and how God never gave me what I truly wanted.
“It’s always been you, Mags…” I whispered into her hair, pressing a kiss against her scalp. I knew she was still sleeping because I would be able to sense the moment she woke up.
I sucked in a deep breath, her scent overwhelming me, so much so that I blinked my eyes closed and found myself in a familiar place.
“What’s wrong with me Killer?!” She screamed. I could hear her erratic heartbeat pounding in my ears. I snapped my eyes open, the smell of her blood hitting me in the face.
“Maggie…” I said her name as softly as I could, the smell of her blood causing something to snap inside of me. I could feel the shift in change the moment my eyes collided with hers.
“Why am I bleeding?” Maggie sounded scared and I could tell she was; I could feel it. I could feel everything.
“Because….” The past and future collided in my mind and I wasn’t sure which was reality or a facade. Images flickered in my mind; the good ones, the bad ones, and then the one that showed the outcome of Maggie and I’s future.
“Killer…” She pleaded, right before her body went limp in my arms.
And it was then I knew what all of this finally meant.
Death was the only thing true in this life.
I flung myself off the bed and away from Maggie. Terror rushed through, her touch fire to my body. How could I be the end of Maggie?
It’s just a dream. But was it really?
“Killer…” Maggie’s voice was full of sleep as she blinked her eyes open, her face full of concern as she took notice of what it was th
at I was doing.
“Don’t come near me, Maggie,” I growled. I was losing control. The memory felt real as if it had actually happened. There was no way, though, she wouldn’t be here right now if I had truly taken her life.
“What’s wrong Killer? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Maggie sat up in the bed, her dark brown eyes growing wide with anxiety.
Deep breathes. Gauge’s words filtered in my thoughts.
I had to get myself, get my senses under control.
I could handle this, I could change the future and alter it. I could save Maggie from myself. I would give up everything to save her, even our love. I knew there were things going on that were out of both of our controls, but I had to find a way to keep us together.
Fear rooted itself deep into my heart. Maggie was the only true thing in my life, the only thing worth risking everything for.
“I can’t…” I mumbled as I searched the floor for clothing, throwing on a pair of shorts and t-shirt. I could call myself stupid for giving her that one glance or maybe it was just wishful thinking, praying that what I had seen wasn’t true and rather just implanted into my mind.
“If you walk out that door without telling me what’s going on Killer, everything between us changes.” Tears welled in those beautiful eyes of hers as she beat one of her fists into the mattress.
My whole body was tethered to hers when she moved I moved. Every breath she took I felt in my own chest and the moment my fingers grasped the doorknob in my hands, I felt her heart break.