So now, instead of calling Cat to ask if it would be okay to turn the late-over into a sleepover, Mala was now headed over there to… what? What was she hoping to accomplish there tonight?
After thinking about it for a moment, Mala realized she wanted to confide in a friend. To tell someone who didn’t know anyone else involved in the scenario just how bad it had been.
Sex wasn’t that important, right? Relationships had been forged off of a lot less than what Darc and she already shared. There was no reason that this needed to be a deal-breaker unless Mala said that it was a deal-breaker.
And what had she been expecting, honestly? She was dating someone who was on the autism spectrum, for crying out loud.
Sex was about intimacy, closeness, vulnerability. These were all things that were a challenge for someone with Darc’s condition.
It was just that Darc managed to be so capable. Asperger’s, even while defining him to a certain extent, had never held him back. He had risen above so many odds.
But seriously, tonight’s attempt could not have been more of train wreck if there had actually been a train wreck involved. Come to think of it, the night might have turned out better if there had been. At least it would have been exciting.
Mala felt a stab of guilt at that. Her thoughts weren’t all that kind or generous right now. But Mala knew enough about healthy behavior that she understood how important it was to experience what she was feeling, rather than try to pretend that she wasn’t.
Maybe she was a terrible person for wanting the sex to be good. But it was also the reality of how she felt. Denying it would only make things worse.
Which was the real reason for heading over to Cat’s house now, instead of waiting until it was time to pick Janey up. The companionship of another woman was exactly what Mala wanted right now. And Maggie was not an option.
Mala chuckled darkly to herself. Actually, Maggie and she could probably swap stories. And maybe that would happen at some point.
Just not tonight.
When Mala had returned to her apartment briefly before heading back out again, she had been pleased to see that not only had Carly managed to not burn down the place, she had spent some time cleaning up the kitchen. In spite of their fight earlier that day, Carly was trying here.
And so was Darc.
That was important to remember. And one bad experience didn’t have to mean that all other experiences would be equally bad.
She turned onto 6th Avenue and pulled up to Cat’s home. It was still relatively early, not much later than 9 o’clock, and all of the downstairs lights were on. One of the upstairs lights was also on, probably one of the bedrooms.
Stepping out of the car and moving across the yard, Mala noticed that Cat’s car was parked in the driveway. It hadn’t been there before, had it? Mala would have noticed.
It was a dark blue classic Mustang, which somehow seemed the perfect vehicle for someone like Cat to drive. On every level, this woman was so much cooler than Mala.
It was a beautiful car. Mala wasn’t a car buff, but even she could acknowledge beauty when she saw it. Steam rose up off the hood in wispy tendrils, showing just how cold the night was turning as the hour progressed.
The quiet giggle of one of the girls… it sounded like Janey… intruded on Mala’s thoughts, redirecting her attention away from a random thought that had just entered into her head. She tore her eyes away from the car and continued across the rest of the lawn.
She climbed the steps up to the house and rapped on the door. There was what felt like the shortest of waits before the door swung wide. There, framed in the doorway, was Mala’s newest friend.
Cat seemed a little harried, but that only made sense, considering the fact that she was watching two young girls. Even though Janey wasn’t all that loud, Mala knew from experience how challenging it could be to watch after her.
“Hey,” Cat said, giving Mala a distracted smile. “You’re here early.” She sounded a bit winded. “Oh. You’re here early,” she repeated, her face turning to one of concern.
“Yeah,” Mala acknowledged. “It was that bad.”
“Oh, sweetheart,” Cat gushed. “Come inside. Let me get you something to drink.”
She bustled Mala into the kitchen and sat her down. Once Mala was seated, Cat gave her a once-over, lingering on Mala’s face.
“This looks like more than what a good rosé can fix.”
Walking over to the fridge, Cat opened the freezer and pulled out a bottle of Grey Goose. Mala started to protest, but Cat waved her off.
“I know. I know. Don’t worry. I won’t let you leave drunk.” She pulled down two tumblers and poured a couple of finger’s worth in both glasses.
Mala had never been a big drinker, and vodka wasn’t a drink that she was all that familiar with. To be honest, she was pretty sure she’d never had it straight.
She took a sip and was surprised. This was a flavored version of vodka, La Vanille, and had accents of caramel and cinnamon, in addition to the lovely vanilla notes. The liquor was much smoother than she would have expected in a hard drink like vodka.
“Good, isn’t it?” Cat said. “I was never much of a vodka drinker until my ex introduced me to this one. ‘Bout the only thing he ever gave me that was any good.” She stopped and glanced toward the upstairs. “Well, that and my daughter, of course.”
Mala nodded, taking another sip of her drink. The warmth spread down from her throat into her belly, creating a lovely, expansive heat that radiated outward, soothing her hurt feelings.
“All right,” Cat said, planting herself in front of Mala. “Time to spill again.”
Looking up at her newfound friend, Mala was uncertain where to begin. She didn’t have a whole lot of experience with the whole spill-your-guts-to-your-best-friend thing. It was a new and awkward encounter for her. The chat earlier in the day had prepared her somewhat, but that had just been about her concerns. This was about something that had actually taken place.
“It was awful,” she finally blurted.
Cat gazed at her for a moment, and then she started laughing. The laughter caught Mala by surprise. She hadn’t felt like there was anything amusing about this at all, but now that she could see Cat responding this way, Mala could begin to see that there was perhaps some humor in it.
“You… sorry,” Cat said, wiping her eyes. “I’m sorry. It’s just that… you tried to sleep with a man that’s autistic and you’re surprised that it didn’t go well?”
Okay. That was kind of funny. Her words mirrored Mala’s own thoughts almost to the letter. Mala felt herself smiling, and a moment later she was joining in with Cat, their laughter mingling together.
“I guess that was pretty foolish, wasn’t it?”
“Well…” Cat said as she sobered a bit. “I guess you never know for sure… He always could’ve been a… whatsit? A savant… in bed, too.”
Mala thought about that and then shook her head. “I don’t think you understand just how bad this was.”
“Really?”
“Think Hindenburg and then apply that to romance. He gave me bare-rooted roses and made candles out of shortening cans. And then the room caught on fire.”
Cat sucked air in through her teeth. “The room caught on fire?” She shook her head. “Really? Ouch.”
“Ouch is right. Well, actually, maybe not completely right.” Mala chuckled. “I don’t know. Some real pain added into the evening might have almost been an improvement. At least it would have been… I don’t know. Adventurous.”
A mischievous grin covered Cat’s face. “I see how it is now. You’re naughty.”
Mala sighed. “Not really. Just not wanting to be bored in this department for the rest of my life.”
“Well, let’s think about that for a sec.” Cat tapped the edge of her tumbler. “Is he the kind of man who’s willing to try?”
That wasn’t something that Mala had to think about for even a second. “Of course.”
“What?”
“Guys have egos. Egos are fragile things, you know? But if you find someone who’s willing to put your well-being over their own pride, you’ve got a winner.”
Mala thought about that for a minute. Darc was bull-headed, hyper-intelligent and emotionally challenged. But was he arrogant?
The more she mulled it over, the more she realized that he wasn’t. Not only had he proven himself willing, and even eager, to change, he’d taken actual steps to achieve it. That was a big deal.
And Darc was a quick study. If Mala hadn’t been so worried about making the moment romantic, perhaps there would have been neither the expectation nor the colossal failure. The fact was, they had entered into this scenario without any real discussion. She knew better than to do that with someone on the spectrum.
Now that she was looking at the situation in this way, Mala realized that so much of this evening’s difficulty could be laid squarely at her feet. She had ramped up her expectations so high, there was no way anyone, let alone a man with Asperger’s, could have fulfilled them. Her own fears that things would not go smoothly in this area had led her to subconsciously sabotage the scenario.
As a psychologist, she saw this behavior in her patients all the time. She should be able to pick it out in herself, but self-diagnosis was always a tricky thing.
The real miracle here was that Darc had not run away screaming at the top of his lungs. It wouldn’t have been outside the realm of possibility.
A man with Asperger’s adapting to frightening change in the moment was nothing to sneeze at. Instead of being devastated by the challenges that had arisen, Mala could choose to be ecstatic about Darc’s marked improvement.
She pushed her drink away and broke the pregnant silence. “Thank you so much.”
Cat raised her eyebrows, looking surprised. “Are you leaving? You just got here.” Then her expression relaxed. “Oh, I see. Needing to make a call?”
Mala grinned and nodded. Cat waved her in the direction of the front door.
“Why don’t you just leave Janey here? It’s still early enough that I’d hate to break up the dynamic duo that’s formed.”
Hesitating, Mala thought about it. From the giggling that had punctuated the evening, it did sound like Janey was having a blast. And Mala could use the privacy, both for her conversation with Darc and perhaps to have another try at a connection with Carly back at the apartment.
“That sounds great,” Mala answered after a brief pause. “Mind if I go and tell her?”
“Of course not,” Cat answered. “Jessalyn’s room is just up the stairs and on the left.”
Mala climbed the staircase and found the door. Even without the directions, it wouldn’t have been hard. The girls were visible through the half-open doorway, and their heads were pushed together as they played with some small figures. Janey had a huge grin on her face, and Mala fought herself for a moment. She didn’t want to interrupt what was happening here.
“Janey?” she finally called out.
Her little girl looked up at Mala, her face lifting in recognition, but then falling as she realized what was probably happening. She placed the figures she had been using on the floor and started to stand up.
“No, no, keep playing,” Mala said, motioning for her to stay seated. “I just wanted to come and ask if you wanted to stay overnight?”
Realization dawned, and a huge grin spread over Janey’s face. She nodded her head with such enthusiasm that Mala worried about the state of the girl’s neck. Mala moved in closer and bent down to give Janey a hug. The return embrace was fierce and clearly happy.
“Looks like you’re already having tons of fun. Have Ms. Figueroa give me a call if you change your mind, okay?”
There didn’t seem to be much chance of that as Janey turned back to her friend and shared an excited look. Mala felt a pang. This was the first time since Janey had come to her that they’d spent a night apart, at least without a kidnapping being involved.
She squared her shoulders. It was a rite of passage. This was a good thing.
Minutes later, after saying her goodbyes to Cat, Mala was walking across the yard again. Steam was still curling off the hood of the blue Mustang, and the thought that had almost formed in her head earlier sprang back with full force.
Why was the car hot? Had Cat gone out that evening? The heat had to have been from not too long ago, or else it wouldn’t still be producing steam.
Mala almost went back up to the house to ask, but there was no way for her to ask that question without it feeling weird. More than likely Cat had just taken the girls out for dinner, or maybe some ice cream. Maybe Mala would ask Janey about it tomorrow.
For the moment, Mala had some chats she needed to conduct.
* * *
Das Spiel. The game.
The chessboard had been set and the pawns were in motion.
It was inspiring what these humans could do when they used all of their higher faculties. The wheels and cogs of this machinery that was now set to grind up all the lesser Tiere in its teeth was prepared. There was nothing that could stop it now.
Nothing but another human. And there was only one that could do much of anything at this point.
The animal still lurked at the human’s side, the lustful little half-man that the human detective allowed to stay with him. It made no sense.
But humans were capable of all sorts of things. Perhaps there was another, deeper plan the bald detective had set in motion for his bestial companion. It was something the tall man had within his skill set, of that there was no doubt.
But what of the woman? The girl was safe, human to the core. The older sister… now that had been a surprise… another beast, but perhaps one that could be reclaimed. But the psychologist. Such promise. Such potential.
And yet it seemed that her bestial instincts could get the best of her as well. Certainly it seemed that her judgment had been compromised. More than once.
And if she did chose to follow her inner beast, what kind of corrupting influence would that be? On the detective, on the girl?
She would need to be dealt with.
But first, the partner. And the partner’s wife. She carried the seed of a beast within her. She would fight to the death rather than lose it, of course. That was what animals did. Humans weighed the consequences, sometimes choosing to end such a pregnancy rather than carry it to term.
So… destruction for her as well. Unless… a thought occurred. It might be possible to find another way forward. One that would take care of the offspring while saving the life of the mother. Her humanity was not completely assured, but once rid of the partner… a lot could change.
So many permutations. And that was just within this small little group. An important group, to be certain, but not the only part of the engine that had been started.
Sometimes, it was necessary to burn the forest to flush out the quarry.
And Seattle was a rich hunting ground, indeed.
Die Jagd rief.
The hunt beckoned.
CHAPTER 11
Trey sat, his back against the door of Darc’s apartment, facing the hallway. It was his penance.
Mags hadn’t kicked him out. Not exactly. There were a lot of reasons why she didn’t want to be a part of this conversation about her ex’s sex life. Understandable, certainly. Trey was now regretting his own involvement.
No, Maggie hadn’t punished him. She’d just made it very clear that he had to fix the mess he’d made. The very big, industrial sized mess. And that he needed to fix it somewhere outside of the apartment. As for her, she was going back to her 50 Shades of Grey or whatever.
The implications here still smarted, even after Maggie explained that this didn’t mean that Trey was bad in bed. It just meant that he was a terrible teacher.
Trey remembered his own teachers, back at the Ca
tholic school he’d attended. Okay. He could live with that assessment.
In retrospect, using metaphors and analogies with Darc hadn’t been the best idea. Trey knew better, but in the moment he’d just gotten excited. Here was something that Trey could do well that his partner couldn’t. That didn’t happen all that much.
So… he’d choked.
Right after his conversation with Maggie, Trey had texted Darc, letting him know that he was available to talk whenever the date was over. That had been several hours ago, and it was now almost eleven o’clock. Maybe the date hadn’t gone so bad. As for Trey, there was only so much Candy Crush he could play on his phone before the batteries went dead or his butt fell off.
A random image of the new serial killer attaching an animal rear end to Trey’s own flashed through his mind, and he surged to his feet. Time to walk off some stiffness.
The killer.
Trey still wasn’t ruling out aliens completely, and lately his dreams had mirrored his obsession. Last night, he’d had one where he was in the episode of The Twilight Zone. “To Serve Man.” Except this time, instead of trying to feed Trey, they kept trotting in different animals, forcing him to chose which one he wanted to swap body parts with.
Trey had settled on the monkey, thinking that, in typical dream logic, a monkey would be the most compatible genetically. And then he’d woken up.
Freaky.
There were a whole lot of ideas that Trey had come up with that he wanted to talk through with Darc. Most of them had come to him while he had been sitting out here in the hallway. Apparently, all Trey needed in order to come up with ideas was to sit still for long enough.
Who knew?
Turning the corner to the elevator, Trey ran headlong into his partner and almost got thrown back. Seriously, what was Darc made of? Granite? Adamantium?
Brushing himself off, Trey started in. “Hey, man. I need to apologize for before. Maggie said that I totally screwed the pooch with this one. Like, completely messed with your head before sending you into combat or whatever.”
3rd Body: Just try to keep your head (Book 1 in the 2nd Darc Murders Collection) Page 18