“Oh,” Lauren said, clearly taken aback, and she hesitantly placed the magazine she’d been reading on the table in front of her as she stood.
“Right this way,” he said, turning and walking into one of the exam rooms behind them.
Lauren felt the slight anxiety begin in her chest as she followed this new doctor into the room.
“Um, is Dr. Wells out sick?” she asked with strained casualness.
“No, he transferred you this morning. You’ll be finishing up the remainder of your therapy with me.”
Lauren froze, and Dr. Lawrence must have noticed the look on her face.
“He didn’t mention this to you?”
She shook her head, silent.
“I apologize then. I thought he’d gone over the switch with you. Let me assure you though, I’ve thoroughly acquainted myself with your information and your therapy plan, and I’m well versed in all the procedures Dr. Wells has been using with you. I’m fully comfortable in going forward as long as you are.”
Lauren swallowed and nodded, too focused on her own insecurities to even acknowledge her anxiety over having another doctor work on her.
Had she done something wrong? She honestly thought the flirting had been mutual. Things had never gotten inappropriate; it had all been so harmless.
At least, she thought it had been harmless.
She laid down on the table, her mind so lost in her own self-doubt that she forgot to panic as the new doctor adjusted her.If you really want something, you shouldn, le
When Lauren left the office twenty minutes later, she was still in a fog of humiliation. She approached her car, mindlessly digging in her purse for her keys, and she found herself trying to come up with an excuse to discontinue her therapy there.
She didn’t want to chance facing him again now that he was clearly trying to avoid her.
“Lauren?”
She froze with her hand in her purse, and she closed her eyes and swallowed before she turned.
He was leaned up against a silver car, dressed in a T-shirt and jeans. It was the first time she’d ever seen him outside of his scrubs.
“Hi,” she said, forcing a smile, and he pushed off the car and walked toward her.
“Listen, I switched you over to Dr. Lawrence’s care,” he said as he shoved his hands in his pockets.
“Yeah, he told me,” she said, the same contrived smile in place as she looked down and continued searching for her keys. She was so aware of herself, of her awkwardness as she tried to ensure that she wasn’t flirting, but at the same time, wasn’t showing her disappointment.
“He’s wonderful,” Adam said. “Taught me everything I know.”
Lauren smiled politely, glancing up as she finally pulled her keys out of her purse.
“You’re in good hands with him,” he assured her. “You only have about two weeks of therapy left anyway, so you’ll be fine.”
Lauren nodded. “Okay, well, thanks for everything,” she said before she turned and started walking toward her car.
Then she stopped.
No more avoiding unpleasant things, she reminded herself, and she turned to see him still standing where she’d left him.
“Can I ask you something?” she asked, straightening her posture.
“Of course.”
“Why did you switch me?”
Adam took a deep breath, running his hand through his hair. “Well, I just thought it would be unprofessional if I asked out one of my patients.”
Lauren blinked, her hand dropping to her side. “What?”
“I know. I could have waited the two weeks until you finished your therapy, but I’ve already waited seven, and it hasn’t been easy.”
She blinked at him again, unmoving, and he smiled his trademark grin.
“So, can I take you out? You basically have to say yes at this point, otherwise I’ve given away my favorite patient for nothing.”
What he was saying finally registered, and Lauren tried not to smile. “So basically I have to go out with you now out of sympathy? Like a pity date?”
He laughed her favorite laugh. “You can call it whatever you want, as long as you let me take you out.”
And when he looked up at her from under his eyelashes, she couldn’t fight her smile any longer. “Well,” she sighed, “I guess one pity date couldn’t hurt. I can always have a friend call me with a fake emergency.”
“Or excuse yourself to the bathroom and escape out the window.”
“That’s right,” she laughed. “I always forget about that one.”
“But Lauren?” he said, beginning to walk backward toward his car.
“Yeah?”
“Give me a chance. I promise you won’t want to escape.”
She bit her lip. “I believe you.”
Adam grinned. “I’ll call you later. We’ll make definite plans,” he said, holding up his hand before he turned and walked back toward his car.
And Lauren watched him go, fighting the urge to jump up and down like a little girl.
Michael stood in the vestibule of Learn and Grow, disappointed to see it was the curly-haired woman who stood in the doorway of the pre-K room dismissing the children today.
He moved over to the bench along the wall, resigning himself to the fact that this was a sign he should leave well enough alone. But as soon as he sat, his new vantage point gave him a clear view of Lauren sitting on top of a table inside the classroom, writing on some type of clipboard.
He watched her chew the corner of her lip the way she always did when she was deep in thought, and he smiled.
She glanced up then, scanning the vestibule, and after a second her eyes landed on him. Before he’d even fully decided to do it, he motioned for her to come out, and she pointed to herself and raised her eyebrows as if to ask, me?
Michael laughed at her innocence and nodded, and she put down the clipboard as she hopped off the table and walked toward the entryway. He stood and circumvented a group of waiting parents as he met her at the door.
“Is everything okay?” she asked.
“Oh, yeah, everything’s fine. I just wanted to run something by you.”
“Okay, what’s up?” she asked, smiling and waving at a little girl who ran past her and out to her mother.
“I wanted to know if you wanted to try that dinner thing again. A real restaurant this time. Someplace without games and kiddie rides.”
“Oh. Um, I have class tonight.”
“Not tonight. I was thinking this Saturday.”
“I can’t.”
Whatever expression crossed his face, it must have been pathetic, because she immediately added, “It’s not because I don’t want to. I just…I already have plans.”
“A date?” he asked, instantly embarrassed by his own brazenness. “Sorry,” he added quickly. “That’s none of my business.”
“It’s okay. But, um…maybe another time?” She smiled politely up at him, and he nodded.
“Sure. That sounds good,” he said, and as soon as she turned and walked back into the classroom, he pulled his brow together and looked down.
“Erin Delaney,” the curly-haired woman called, and seconds later Erin came bounding out of the room.
“Hi Daddy!” she beamed, hugging him around the leg, and he bent and scooped her up.
“Hi baby girl. Did you have a good day?”
“Yes! We played hide-and-seek and I won!”
Michael laughed. “Good job,” he said, kissing her forehead before he put her down and took her hand. “Maybe we can play tonight after dinner.”
“Okay, but you’re gonna lose!” she sing-songed. “I’m really, really good.”
As they walk straight out to the car, Michael tried to focus on what he’d make for dinner that night and where he would hide when Erin asked him to play later.
But instead, his mind kept going back to the fact that Lauren had a date this Saturday night.
He had been right when he said it was no
ne of his business. It wasn’t. Yet he couldn’t help feeling irritated by the whole thing. It was ridiculous; he knew that. He was trying to reestablish a friendship with her, so why should he care if she was dating someone else?
He kept asking himself that question, although he damn well already knew the answer.
It would be hard enough trying to win back her trust, he reminded himself, hard enough trying to earn back her friendship. So he needed to put a lid on whatever possessive, jealous bullshit was fueling his thoughts. He needed to get a grip, and fast.
Because if he thought for one second he had a shot at anything else, he was out of his mind.
June 2001
Lauren sat on Jenn’s bed, reading aloud the questions to the latest Cosmo quiz titled, “Are You Good-Girl Hot or Bad-Girl Hot?” to Jenn at her insistence.
“Last question,” Lauren said. “You spot a cute guy across the room at a party, and your interest is piqued. Do you: (a) Stroll right over and whisper, ‘Need another drink?’ breathily in his ear; (b) Stay put until he finally chats with a mutual friend and then make your move; or (c) ‘Accidentally’ brush up against him, smile, and introduce yourself?”
“Hmm,” Jenn said as she put the cap back on her nail polish and gently blew on her freshly painted fingernails. “C.”
Lauren smiled and shook her head, jotting that down as she totaled up Jenn’s points. “Okay,” she finally said. “According to the Cosmo gurus, you are a Badass Bombshell.”
Jenn nodded proudly. “Damn straight. What else does it say?”
“It says you strike the right balance between being naughty and nice, and you lure guys in by being playfully provocative. You put just enough out there to keep guys guessing, and anticipation is sexy.”
“Sounds about right,” Jenn said with a smile, hopping up on the bed next to Lauren and holding her hands up with her fingers fanned out. “You like?”
“Very pretty,” Lauren said, closing the magazine and tossing it to the floor as she flopped onto her stomach. “What do you want to do now?”
“Hmm. Oh, I know. Let’s talk about how hopelessly in love you are with Del.”
Lauren whipped her head toward her friend. “What? What the hell are you talking about?”
Jenn tilted her head. “Oh come on, Lauren.”
She turned away from Jenn with a huff. “It’s too bad there’s not a quiz in there about how well you know your friends, because you’d fail it miserably.”
“Would I?” Jenn asked, and Lauren ignored her, reaching for the remote and trying hard to focus on the television as she flipped quickly through the channels.
“I still don’t know what you see in him,” Jenn went on casually, checking out her nails. “I mean, I think he’s a scary maniac. But he obviously acts different with you, so like, if you want him, and it will make you happy, then I say go for it.”
A silence filled the space between them, and Lauren chewed on the corner of her lip.
“How?” she asked softly.
“I knew it!” Jenn yelled, hopping up onto her knees as she pointed at Lauren.
“Yes, you’re a genius,” Lauren deadpanned. “Are you going to help me or make fun of me?”
“Help you, of course,” Jenn said, sitting back down on the bed and fanning her hands.
Lauren rolled onto her side, facing her friend. “I think you’re going to have your work cut out for you. I mean, we’ve been friends for almost a year. He hasn’t made a move at all.”
Jenn blew on her thumbnail as she looked up at Lauren from under her lashes. “Have you?”
“No!”
“Have you even flirted with him?”
Lauren sighed. “I don’t know. I mean, we laugh a lot. We always have fun. But I don’t know that I’ve intentionally flirted. Besides,” Lauren said, rolling onto her back and staring up at the ceiling, “he’s not the kind of guy who holds back his feelings. If he liked me, I kind of think I’d know it by now. I’m like a sister to him.”
“No,” Jenn said, shaking her head. “I don’t believe that.”
“He calls me Red.”
“So?”
“So that’s like the equivalent of guys calling each other by their last names,” Lauren said. “Guys don’t call a girl they’re interested in by her last name.”
“It’s not your last name. It’s a pet name. It’s adorable.”
Lauren rolled her head to the side to face Jenn. “I thought you said he was a scary maniac.”
“Oh, he is. He totally is. But you’re, like, his kryptonite.” Lauren laughed, and Jenn flopped down on the bed next to her. “I just think his head is so far up his ass with all of those sluts he hooks up with that he doesn’t realize he wants to be with an actual good girl.” She turned toward Lauren. “You, of course.”
“Charming, Jenn.”
“But,” Jenn continued, not missing a beat, “there’s a surefire way to get a guy to realize he wants you, and tonight’s the perfect night to pull it off.”
Lauren rolled back on to her side to face her friend, totally on Jenn’s hook. “What do I have to do?”
“You have to hook up with someone else.”
Lauren laughed, but Jenn looked at her straight-faced until her laughter gradually slowed. “You’re serious?” she asked hesitantly.
“That junior Travis what’s-his-name is having a party tonight. His parents are out of town, and there will be drinking there. No adults plus booze equals Del. So tonight, he’ll go. We’ll go. And you’ll find a cute guy, and you’ll hook up with him,” Jenn said pragmatically.
Lauren threw her hands up in the air. “How in the hell would that be productive?”
“Because you’re just so ... pure. Which is a great thing,” Jenn added quickly, holding her hand up. “But sometimes, guys need to be reminded that there’s another side to girls like that. If he hears you hooked up with someone, it will make him think of you in a sexual situation. And once he does that, he won’t be able to help thinking of himself with you in a sexual situation. And then he’ll get jealous that it wasn’t him, and you’re golden,” she said, as if she’d just explained the simplicity of two plus two equaling four.
Lauren bit her bottom lip, blinking up at the ceiling. In a twisted way, there was some logic behind what Jenn had just said.
“I don’t know,” Lauren said, but even she could hear the lack of conviction in her voice.
“Trust me, Laur,” Jenn said. “If you want Del to want you, you have to make him think about what he’s missing.”
Lauren inhaled deeply, wringing her hands together. Maybe she should take Jenn’s advice. She was popular with guys, and always seemed to get the attention of whomever she was interested in.
And after all, she had just been deemed a Badass Bombshell by one of the most popular women’s magazines.
She closed her eyes and covered her face with her hands. “I can’t believe I’m going to do this,” she said, and she felt the bed bounce as Jenn jumped up beside her.
“That’s my girl!” Jenn said, grabbing her wrist and pulling her off the bed. “Get in the shower. We’ve got a party to go to.”
Okay, this is kind of nice, Lauren thought to herself as she felt Mark’s lips find hers again in the darkness. They were in the den on the first floor of the party, and through the closed door, Lauren could still hear the muted sounds of everyone outside.
Jenn had picked Mark out for her not five minutes after they arrived at the party. Lauren had seen him around school a few times. He played lacrosse, and according to Jenn, he had helped her find her class once when she had gotten lost the semester before. “He’s nice,” she assured Lauren. “And single. Go for it.”
So they had mingled a little bit as Lauren slowly sipped a beer, allowing her inhibitions to become slightly fuzzy, until eventually Jenn said it was time to make their move. They walked over to where Mark and a few of his friends were hanging out, and Jenn got the conversation going until Lauren and Mark were t
alking and laughing on their own.
At one point, Jenn leaned over and whispered in Lauren’s ear that Del had just gotten there, although Lauren had yet to see him. “Ask Mark if he wants to go talk somewhere else. He’ll get what you mean,” Jenn said before taking a step back and continuing her conversation with one of his friends.
And as soon as Lauren asked him, he smiled and nodded as he took her hand and walked her to the den.
She had to admit, Jenn knew her stuff.
They had sat on the couch with the door slightly ajar, talking for another few minutes, and then Mark leaned in and kissed her. As soon as he realized she was willing to kiss him back, he had gotten up and locked the door.
And now they were lying on their sides, facing each other on a wide, comfortable couch in the darkness as he continued to kiss her.
She liked the way he kissed, how soft his lips seemed. He was playful, alternating as she rested her head on his shoulder. It only took a few minutes of that before Lauren felt herself growing breathless.
But then they started to move past kissing. It wasn’t that it was unpleasant; it was just…weird. Maybe it wouldn’t have been if she hadn’t been so nervous.
His hands on her breasts were kind of nice, but when his hand ended up between her legs, it was awkward and a little uncomfortable.
And when she put her hand on him, she tried to do what she thought would feel good, but it was the first time she’d ever touched a boy like that. Her movements were kind of clumsy, and he ended up putting his hand around hers and guiding her until it was over.
And then he got up, turned on the lamp, cleaned himself up, and asked if she was ready to go back to the party.
As soon as they opened the door, Lauren found herself squinting against the brightness of the light in the house. She reached up and ran her hand through her hair, realizing it was a tangled mess, and she began combing through it with her fingers.
She looked up at Mark, and he winked down at her before he turned and walked back toward the party.
Lauren stood there, blinking against the light as she tried to spot Jenn in the crowd, when suddenly someone grabbed the top of her arm and spun her around.
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