by Nobilis Reed
I grabbed her hand and shoved it against my crotch. “Do it, Valka. Please.”
She chuckled and stroked my pussy lips. A part of my mind was aware that they had become warm and swollen, but that part was now very small and quiet compared to the lather of anticipation in the rest of it.
Then she knelt at my feet, gently pushed my thighs apart, and licked. At first, it was a tentative touch—a stroke here, a poke there—but gradually, she gave it more and more energy.
My eyes practically fell out of my head. How could anything feel like that? How could anything feel so good? I gasped with the pure pleasure of it. My head thumped against the wall of the shower but I didn’t care. My knees shook and wanted to buckle, but she held me there, as the broad softness of her tongue ran through my new sex, dragging over my clit with every stroke. There was no finesse, no exploration, just a relentless, insistent, driving stimulation.
Oh yes. This was arousal, like nothing I had ever felt before. Each touch of her tongue pushed me another inch higher on a wave that seemed to have no crest. Desperate to reach the top, I grabbed my breasts, squeezing them, pinching my sensitive nipples between my fingers. It wasn’t like my cock had been shrunk down to the size of my pinky finger without losing a single nerve ending—though, in a way, that was probably true. It was a completely different experience. My consciousness seemed to expand rather than contract, taking in everything. The feel of steam in my lungs, the faint antiseptic scent of the gel, the slick feel of my skin under my hands, the hard floor under my feet, and the unbelievable touch of Valka’s tongue on my clit—it all combined in a synaesthetic whirl of sensation, twisted together in a mind-bending cyclone of pleasure.
I whimpered something incomprehensible as the first shudders of true orgasm racked my body. My vision blurred. My knees buckled and, once again, Valka held me up, pinned to the wall, helpless under her tongue. As I paused and caught my breath, I thought that would be it, but Valka kept at it, and within moments, I felt my body launching into another cycle of arousal, even greater than the first. I cried out this time, her name I think, and I felt her slip her fingers inside me. In a more lucid moment, I would have been able to name the places she touched, but at that moment, I was too far gone for conscious thought. My whole body quivered as a third orgasm ran through me and I screamed in ecstasy. Every orgasm I had ever had as a man paled in comparison.
She relented then, finally, standing again under my shoulder, helping me to stay on my feet. I stared, mute, unable to put any of my experience into words. She put a gentle hand over my pussy, as if to protect it from further stimulation.
“When this is over,” she said, “I think you will be the best lover the Scouts have ever known.”
Then she flicked a finger across my nipple and shudders, weaker this time, echoed through my body again. I put my hands over them, but I had only two hands and four breasts. She flicked again and another spasm made me let out a little gasp.
Valka giggled and I had to laugh a little myself. Then she flicked a finger against my clit, and the laughter dissolved into another sigh of pleasure.
“Stop,” I said. My voice was little more than a breath. “That’s . . . oh . . . enough. You’ve made your point.”
Then she kissed me. It wasn’t like the quick little pecks we had shared now and then, but a deep, languorous kiss, making full use of tongue and lips and teeth.
When I regained something of my composure, we climbed into the warm air vent and dried each other off.
“I have something I need to tell you,” I said, my higher voice still sounding unfamiliar to my ears.
She shushed me. “It’ll keep. We have an hour ride in the transit car in front of us. There will be plenty of time to talk.”
We tied our hair back in braids and dressed in the clothes we had prepared.
I knew, then, why it was that more Scouts didn’t go through this kind of transformation. There was a disconnectedness, as if everything that was happening to me was artificial, a simulation. The change had a price, I could tell, a price borne by living through the slightly altered perceptions of a body not wholly my own. In time, I could get used to it, but going through this kind of change too often probably wouldn’t be good for my mental state.
As we made our way carefully through the empty section of the academy, my thoughts drifted to Trace. She had gone through something similar to this and hated it. I could understand like I couldn’t before. I loved the feel of a woman’s body, so having one of my own to play with wasn’t such a terrible thing. If I didn’t feel that way, though, this body could easily be a prison.
Once Valka had diverted control of the transit car and we were on our way, she turned to me with a serious look in her eye. “All right,” she said. “Something’s on your mind.”
I had to take a moment to collect myself, to remember what I had wanted to say after we had gotten out of the shower. Then another moment to think of exactly how to say it.
“I love you, Valka. Even with everything that’s happened, I still love you.”
She giggled and shook her head. “That’s just the hormones. A really good orgasm can make you feel like that for a while. Don’t pay it any attention.”
“No, I felt like this before. I’m sure of it.” I brought my gaze up to her eyes. “And I think you still love me, too.”
“Tell me that when you’re a man again, and we’ll talk.” She gave me a broader grin than I had ever seen.
“There’s something else,” I said.
She nodded.
“I love Shirley, too. When I thought I had lost you, when I gave up hope, I turned to her, and made something of a bond.”
“I hoped you would.”
I leaned over in the seat and hugged her. Maybe it was just the lingering chemical influence of the encounter, but in that moment, I could not imagine loving her any more than that. She was perfect.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
The trip to the Ovor maternity school took something like an hour, and Valka and I talked the whole way. I coached her a little on Ovor customs. I didn’t know whether the Ovors here at headquarters would follow the same rules as their counterparts out on the stations, but it couldn’t hurt to know.
But that was a cover. I was nervous. I couldn’t get the sex we’d had in the shower out of my mind. When the conversation paused, I just came out and said it.
“Do you like me better like this? I mean, as a female.”
She gave me a quirky little smile and looked out the front window of the transit car. “Better isn’t exactly the right word. More like, I just couldn’t stop myself. When I saw that you were all excited like that? I wanted to just make you come and come.”
“Do you like women more than men?”
“No. I like men too. Men are . . .” She shrugged. “Different.”
“Of course. What I mean is, would you rather have sex with a woman than a man? Because there was this cadet, Trace, who liked having sex with men. Only men. The Scouts turned him into a woman.”
“That’s rather drastic.”
“She hates it. Hates her partner, hates her life. I worry about her sometimes.”
“Well, you don’t have to worry about me. I like having sex with men just fine.”
“Fine?”
“All right, so Masters isn’t exactly the best partner in the world. It’s not like I can’t orgasm with him. I’d just like it better with someone a bit less wrapped up inside himself.”
“Like . . .”
She rolled her eyes. “Challers, we’re not going to be having sex any time soon.”
“We just had sex.”
“I mean with you as a man.”
“Why not? We’re already breaking all kinds of rules here, enough to get us killed, what’s one more?”
Her shoulders slumped and she closed her eyes. She sagged in her seat. A breath laden with emotional cargo passed her lips and she shook her head. “I can’t.”
I put my arm around he
r and pulled her close.
“You don’t understand, Challers. You can’t understand. You’re so innocent, so sweet . . .”
She sniffed and sobbed. I had a hard time keeping myself from breaking down, too, and I didn’t even know what she was crying about.
“Valka, what’s wrong? You can tell me. You can trust me. Okay, so I’m a virgin. So what? So are you. What’s the big deal?”
That just released a whole new burst of tears. “No, Challers. No.”
“Don’t do this to me. Don’t tell me there’s some reason that you don’t want me, and then not tell me what it is. Is it something I did? Something I said? Something that makes me always a boyfriend, never a lover?”
“Oh, Challers, no. You’ve always been a good guy.”
“Then what? I think I deserve that much, at least. To know why? Don’t I?”
She took a long, calming breath. I recognized the meditation trick from Physicality class. She spoke quietly with her eyes on the floor. “For a long, long time, back on the Station, my father was . . .” She swallowed. “He would come in my room at night and . . .” Her voice trailed off and she choked a bit.
“What?” She was trying to get me to fill in the empty spots for her, but the blanks were just blank.
Her tears suddenly flashed into anger. “Do I have to diagram it out for you? Do I have to show you a damn holo? Vack, Challers, how dense can you be?” She was nearly shouting at me.
“Are you saying he beat you up?”
“No! Come on, Challers! Don’t make me say it!’
“Say what? I don’t know what you’re talking about!” I slapped my hand on the seat between us.
She turned and shouted at me. “He’d fuck me, Challers! He’d vacking fuck me!”
The image of Valka’s father, huge and stern, loomed in my imagination. How could someone so much in authority take such advantage? I couldn’t imagine why anyone would want to do anything like that. It was completely alien. But he had never liked me and this told me why. The thought of him, on top of . . .
No. I wasn’t going to imagine it. I pushed the thought aside and tried to calm my angry stomach. I breathed, remembering my meditation exercises, keeping oxygen in a brain that very much wanted to fade into hypoxia. Time went by, seconds that felt like hours, and I realized that Valka’s expression was shading from anger to resignation.
“See? You’re horrified. Vack! I shouldn’t . . .” She sobbed thickly. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”
“What? No, no, Valka, I’m just stunned.” I put my hand on her shoulder. I felt like an idiot. I couldn’t think of what to say that would make things any better, so I just said what I felt. “I’m horrified by what happened. I’m not horrified by you. I love you. I could never be horrified with you. Come here.” I turned her around, held her close, and let her cry.
After a long time, her tears dried up and her gasping sobs quieted to quivering but mostly even breaths.
“I’m still here,” I said when I judged the time was right. “I’m stunned and I don’t know what to say, but I’m still here, and I still love you.”
“Thank you.” She managed to uncurl herself enough to give me a peck on the cheek, and then she lay her head down on my lap.
I stroked her hair. “I wish I could sing or something. I’d love to sing you a lullaby, but I don’t know any.”
“That’s okay. Just being with you is enough.”
I looked up to see a light approaching on the side of the tunnel. “Unfortunately, you can’t stay there much longer. We’re here.”
She blinked and looked around as if waking from a deep sleep. “We are?” Her voice seemed to convey dread at the end of our trip.
“You can wait here, if you like. With luck this won’t take long.”‘
“No,” she said, getting to her feet. “I’m fine. I’m coming with you. You might need me.” She sniffed and rubbed her eyes.
“All right.”
There was a sign at the station indicating that the maternity school was just up the main corridor, at the end of which, we found a pair of huge wooden doors with an iron clapper attached to the front of one. That impressed me; making anything out of real wood was unusual, let alone anything that large.
“I don’t see an intercom or anything,” said Valka.
“I guess this is the way to summon someone.” I lifted the clapper from the iron plate that was under it and let it fall back against the door. It made a satisfyingly loud noise in the quiet corridor.
“It’s dark shift; do you think anyone will come?”
“They have to have someone to handle emergencies in the middle of the night. Someone will come.”
It took another two knocks, but eventually the door opened. An Ovor girl, just on the edge of adolescence, pushed the door open and looked us over. She was wearing a white thigh-length robe with long flowing sleeves. I started to speak, but she put a finger to my lips and shook her head. Evidently, we were to keep silent. I nodded to Valka and followed her in.
The corridors were dark except for a pale orange glow coming from recessed indirect lights near the ceiling. The girl led us a short way down a side hall and indicated a doorway. Through it, we could see a small sleeping chamber.
“No, no, I . . .”
The girl stopped me with an upraised hand. Clearly, she was not going to hear anything I said. Before I could try to get through to her, Valka pulled me in and closed the door. Behind it, there was a pair of short robes similar in cut to the one the girl had been wearing, but blue in color.
“What are you doing? We need to get to Suna.”
She glared at me and whispered, “And we’re not going to do that by talking to that one. Look, there aren’t any cameras and I don’t think the door is locked. Once she’s gone back to bed, we’ll sneak out and have a look around. Maybe we can find Suna.” She handed one of the robes to me, and then put on the other one.
“Of course. I’m sorry, I guess I was just too focused on getting to her as soon as possible.”
“Just keep your head straight and your eyes open, Challers.” Valka poked her head out and looked both ways. “Looks like it’s empty. Come on.”
As we crept through the empty halls, I shrugged my shoulders and pulled at the garment around me. It felt heavy and constricting even though it was only loosely tied.
“What’s wrong with you?” Valka whispered.
“I guess I got used to wearing the cadet uniform.”
“Well get used to this and keep alert. You’re not doing me any good like this.”
All the rooms along the corridor where we were staying were the same—small apartments with two beds. Some were occupied, but most were empty. Luckily, the doors were very quiet and we could peek inside without waking anyone.
About halfway down the hallway, I stopped. “We’re not going to find her here.”
“No?”
“No. All these Ovors? They’re not carrying eggs. No belly. I’m not sure what they’re here for, but it’s not for help giving birth.”
“Hmm, okay, so?”
“So Suna came here with a belly full of eggs. I’m thinking she’ll be in a different wing.”
We doubled back and went out to the entrance. Sure enough, across the main hall, there was another archway. We crossed over and started looking through those rooms.
As I had suspected, the Ovors on this side of the school had huge bellies, even larger than a pregnant puregen would look. Unfortunately, this made our search harder. I had to get a good look at each one’s face to know it wasn’t Suna. Still, I felt that we were on the right track and the corridor wasn’t very long. We were going to find her.
That’s when I blew it.
I opened the door and saw a male Ovor dressed in a green robe, sitting in bed, reading from a tablet. He looked up, saw me before I could duck back out of sight, and smiled. He gestured for me to come closer. I shook my head and pulled the door closed.
We ran back towards
our room, pausing at the corner to look back. His door was opening. My heart thundering, I pointed back towards our room.
“He never saw you,” I hissed. “Get back, I’ll try to distract him.”
Reluctantly, she complied. Once she was out of sight, I crept back out into the hallway.
He smiled again, a genuine smile full of warmth. He gestured for me to join him in his room.
I went in, he followed me, and he closed the door behind us.
“There,” he said quietly. “We can talk now.”
“Isn’t that against the rules or something?”
“So is wandering the halls during dark shift.” He stepped over to a low table and poured two small glasses of a thick white liquid, and offered one to me.
I took it, but didn’t drink. “I couldn’t sleep. I was just . . .”
“You were looking for someone, maybe?” He took a sip from his glass and licked the residue from his lips. “Maybe I can give you what you came looking for.”
There was a twitch in the front of his robe and if it was what I thought it was, I wanted no part of it.
“I’m looking for a friend. I need to give her a message.”
“Maybe I can help you. Then we both can accomplish our goals.”
“And your goal is?”
“Expansion of the species, of course. That’s what we all want, here, don’t we?” He pulled off the belt of his robe and it fell open. Underneath, he was naked. His cock, only half-erect, seemed monstrous.
I gasped.
“There’s nothing to be afraid of. In fact, if experience is any guide, I’m sure you’ll quite like it.”
“No.” I went to the table and set the drink down. My hands were trembling. “No, I don’t think I will. I’ll go back to my room now, thank you.”
His hand caught my arm, just above the elbow. His voice went cold. “We have a duty to perform. Leave now, and I’ll report you to the headmistress.”
“I said no.” I grabbed his hand and twisted, forcing it up and behind his back in a classic armlock.
He squawked in surprise, but I knew he was going to shout for help any second. I needed to end this confrontation, fast and quiet. My other arm went around his throat and he began struggling in earnest.