“I’m happy to see you too Mum! It must have been a hard month on you. How’s Alex and Dad?” I asked softly.
“They are doing alright. Alex was a wreck at the start. Well, we all were at the start. The doctors convinced us it was all positive signs for Sarah. We visit her every day hoping for change and it finally happened two days ago. Your Dad has been in and out as much as he can, but he’s been busy with work as usual. I don’t blame him though, since we can’t all stop our lives.” She said. We moved toward the luggage carousel and changed subject to speaking of the little things that occurred while I was away. Collecting my bags we went to the car and left.
“Mum. Can we go straight to the hospital please? I’d like to see Sarah as soon as I can.” I requested.
“Of course dear.” She replied.
Arriving at the hospital she led me through all of the corridors up an elevator, and into a private room. Alex was sitting in a chair with Sarah’s hand in his, and didn’t see us come in. I stood near the entrance just looking at my sister in silence. She was hooked up to various tubes and monitors. My heart sank. It was not how I wanted to see her.
“Alex! How are you holding up?” I said, as I walked closer. He stood and placed Sarah’s hand back onto the bed.
“I’ve been better James. I’m glad you’re home. Sarah will be happy to see you when she wakes up.” He said quietly. Giving him a quick yet firm embrace we slapped each other’s backs, and a silent understanding passed between us. He moved to stand next to my mother and I positioned myself in his vacated chair.
Sarah looked hollow and lifeless, the most apparent difference was the weight she had lost. Her cheeks far more prominent in her face than previously, and her skin was a few shades paler. Her eyes fluttered now and then, which I assumed was a good sign.
“What makes the doctors think she will wake up soon?” I asked, not looking away.
“She’s started showing further signs of consciousness they tell me. Apparently, she woke up just for a moment but lapsed.” Alex replied, with a touch of hope in his voice.
I watched my sister until my mother’s hand landed softly on my shoulder. “We should head home. You need some food and some sleep. We will be able to come back tomorrow.” She said quietly. Nodding my agreement, I stood and leaned over Sarah and kissed her on the forehead.
“I’ll see you soon sis. You better wake up soon or I won’t be able to tell you about all of the thousands of girls I’ve been seeing.” I whispered with a smile. For a second I could have sworn I saw a twitch across her face. We left Alex in his chair and made our way out.
It was nice to be home, although I definitely wasn’t enjoying the difference in temperature. Coming from the start of winter to the start of summer was not fun, but it was nice to see Mum and Dad, even in such a stressful time.
The family house hadn’t changed a bit since I was last here. Mum put me up in my old bedroom which was now a guest room. The familiar surroundings made me cozier than I had been since I left.
Canada was an amazing place and I loved Banff, but it wasn’t home. Showering and changing I joined my parents in the family room as the smells of cooking drew me in.
My father, John, sat in his customary chair with his feet kicked up and socks on the coffee table. My mother, Katherine, was walking between the sofa and the kitchen trying to catch glimpses of the TV which had some sort of talent show on. Dad seemed to be ignoring it entirely while reading a book with his eyelids so low that he was either reading or asleep. It was sometimes hard to tell.
“Alright boys, dinner is ready.” Mum said, as she moved hot items from kitchen to dinner table. Dad was up without any hesitation, and made his way to the table to sit at the head. I sat down next to him and he nodded in my direction.
“You been keeping out of trouble Son?” he asked.
“You know me Dad. Do my best to stay in trouble whenever I can.” I replied, smiling. He grunted and gave me a wry smile.
“Glad you’re home. It’s been a tough time for everyone.” He said quietly.
“Me too Dad, but hopefully everything will be back to normal soon.” I added. He smiled at that, nodding his agreement.
“We’ll have more news soon I’m sure.” Added mum, as she joined us at the table placing down the remainder of the food, “Let’s just enjoy dinner and talk of other things for now. It’s been stressful enough. Tell us of your travels James.” She asked.
“Well, where to start!” I said, thinking. I set to telling them of my adventures. I spoke of everything barring a few tidbits. I spoke of Amanda, and how I had met her at the LA airport, and then again at Banff in a snowboarding lesson. I even added the kiss for Mum’s benefit to which I was rewarded with an ‘Ooh’ and a ‘She sounds lovely, when do we meet her?’ Laughing at that, I continued with my story. Filling them in on all the friends I had made, and the experiences we had shared. I had made the right decision to move to Canada.
I had only been gone for a short time, but I already had more fun in that time than I’d had in the last few years. Everyone’s mindset was so different. Instead of thinking about the work grind or the daily commute, it was a community of like minded travelers, all searching for something. Only now as I highlighted everything to my parents, did I realize just how much I had enjoyed my time there.
Our meal was filled with stories and laughter. Almost everything was like how it used to be in years gone by, and I smiled at the thought. Exhaustion finally getting the better of me, I excused myself and went to bed. International flights were not something my body enjoyed.
Waking late the next morning, Dad had already gone to work, and Mum was busying herself around the house. She had already made some breakfast for me and set it aside. I ate quietly and had a shower. I got ready, and Mum and I went to the hospital to check up on Sarah. Alex wasn’t there yet, but after sitting with Sarah for a while he arrived with flowers in a vase.
He replaced the ones on Sarah’s bedside table and joined me at her side pulling up another chair. We sat there quietly, speaking softly for hours. I filled Alex in on my adventures and we spoke of better times.
The next few days were filled with similarity as each morning I made my way to the hospital with my mother and more often than not saw Alex there. It was a waiting game pure and simple. The doctors kept filling our heads with positives and after a time I could understand why. Sarah’s color seemed to be coming back slowly bit by bit, and Alex could see it too. He had a glimmer of hope in his eyes.
We sat at the dinner table eating quietly one evening when Mum’s phone rang. She walked over to the bench and answered, “Hello?” After a moment, “Speaking.” Dad turned around and I put my knife and fork down and we both watched as her facial expression changed from confusion to understanding, and to what looked like sadness. Tears started rolling down her cheeks and a smile cracked her face. “Oh my God. Thank you so much! Thank you! Thank you! We’re on our way.” Hanging up the phone she turned and looked at us.
Her eyes full with tears of happiness, “She’s awake. She’s come back to us!” Mum cried. Dad stood and walked over to her and held her tightly. She cried for a moment and said, “Let’s go see our daughter.” Looking at me, she continued, “Your sister.”
The house was chaos as we ignored the dinner cooling off on the table and gathered our things. Dad managed to get us to the hospital in what I thought would easily have been record timing.
We rushed through the corridors and I couldn’t help but smile as my sister was waiting for us. We rounded the final corner and found the door to her room closed. Mum knocked gently and Alex came to the door. He looked as if years of stress had fallen from his face. His eyes shone brightly, and with a warm smile, he beckoned us all inside.
As we entered the room, Sarah opened her eyes weakly and a gentle tired smile filled her face. She tried to speak but only soft sounds came out. Instead, she beckoned us closer and we wrapped her in a hug.
My eyes filled with tears an
d I couldn’t help but cry. It had been a hard road since finding out she had been in an accident. All of our worries and fears were starting to fall away, and an overwhelming sense of relief flooded through me.
We stayed with her for hours, until finally we were asked to leave and give her some rest. Alex stayed, and Sarah was soon sleeping, but this time a natural sleep with a smile upon her face.
Doctors spoke to us as we were leaving saying that she would be fine, and that we just needed to give her time to recover. She would soon be back to normal. Thanking them all we made our way home with smiles on our faces. Everything would be alright after all.
Our next days were filled with visits to the hospital. Sarah’s strength was returning and she was speaking in bursts more and more. We spoke at first of nothing in particular just enjoying each other’s company, and the fact she was returning to healthy, but as she grew stronger she asked me of my travels.
“So little brother. Tell me! What have you been doing while you were away?” She said slowly. I filled her in entirely, leaving nothing out as we were alone for now. She smiled in parts, laughed, and shook her head with a sad little smile at the end of my story.
“So what you are telling me is… You let this ‘amazing’ girl of yours get away just because your older sister was in a little accident?” She said, shaking her head. I began to protest but she stopped me with a laugh, “I’m glad you came home to see me James. I’m also glad everyone made you stay in Canada after my accident.” She began, her voice still fairly weak, “You would have been just another person sitting in a hospital. No. You’ve done the right thing. As for this Amanda girl of yours, we’re going to have to do something about that, aren’t we?” She said with her no nonsense tone of voice.
Sarah looked off into the distance and I could see she was already thinking of a plan. Shaking my head in dismay, I threw my hands in the air playfully.
“I guess I won’t have a choice in this will I?” I said indignantly, but a smile crept across my face.
“Not even a little bit.” She replied.
My sister was back! It had taken some time for her to be back to a state where the hospital staff were confident she would be fine. But here we were. She was able to return home.
Sitting in her house with the whole family present. Aunties, uncles, cousins, grandparents, and everyone else had come to welcome her home. It was great to see everyone so happy and laughing. The family was back together again.
As I sat there I thought to myself, it would be nice to have these occasions just for the sake of it, instead of waiting for something to happen to someone. Putting those thoughts aside, I returned my attention to Sarah who was thanking everyone for being there for her.
We spent the day enjoying everyone’s company until late in the day people started to head home. After kissing everyone goodbye, Mum, Dad and I were the last to leave. Before doing so Sarah managed to pull me aside. “Do you have Amanda’s email address at least?” She asked in conspiring tones.
“Yes I do, but I haven’t spoken to her since she left Banff. I don’t know what I would say to her.” I replied.
“Don’t worry about that. We’ll figure something out.” She said, winking.
“We?” I replied, looking at her with eyebrows raised.
“Yes we, little brother. I can’t let you torture yourself any longer, it’s sad to see!” She started, “Oh my love stricken brother! What a sad state of affairs you are in.” She said dramatically, placing the back of her hand on her head and striking a pose.
“Oh thanks so much Sis.” I replied sarcastically.
“You’re so very welcome brother.” She said, taking me painstakingly seriously. Which only served to frustrate me more. She had always known which buttons to press, and when. I could only sigh.
“Okay! Alright! I give up. Let’s do it your way then.” I said, as I looked at her and held my hands in the air in a sign of submission.
“Naturally.” She said, patting me on the shoulder reassuringly, “Come by tomorrow and we will write your fair maiden princess an email full of love and romance!” She said laughing. I groaned and mumbled but a smile flashed across my face when she wasn’t watching.
“Okay then I’ll see you tomorrow, if you’re going to be so insistent. Love you Sis! Take care of yourself!” I said, as I embraced her.
Mum and Dad said their own goodbyes and we made our way home. On the ride back, I couldn’t stop thinking of what I was going to say to Amanda. I was thankful I would have Sarah’s help in the matter, but I could never tell her that. She would never let me forget it.
My sleep was interrupted with thoughts of Amanda throughout the night. Dreams of our kiss mixed with the thoughts of how things had ended between us. She had such a profound effect on me whenever I was around her, like I couldn’t control myself. Whatever the case, it wouldn’t help to be getting no sleep. Burrowing my head deep into my pillow, I closed my eyes again and tried to let go of my thoughts. Soon enough I was drifting back to sleep. Amanda’s smile soon found its way into my dreams once more.
Sarah was well and back at home. Morning came and I borrowed Mum’s car and drove to her house. As she greeted me at the door, she walked me inside and told me some of the ideas she thought might be appropriate for getting in touch with my princess. As she now seemed to be referring to her. I couldn’t help but smile and shake my head.
“I’ve been thinking we need to go with something simple to start off with. You haven’t seen her in a while now, so you can’t get too full on right away. Even though you’re desperately in love with her!” She said, laughing at me as she spoke. It seemed Sarah couldn’t help herself. I guess that’s just the job of older sisters.
“Okay! So what am I meant to say to her? I wouldn’t say I’m ‘desperately in love with her’ but sure I want to spend more time with her.” I started slowly, “Shit. Let’s just call a horse a horse. I’m lonely, Sis, but when I’m around Amanda I feel something special like nothing else matters.” I added quietly, pausing for a few moments to think.
“Remember, I hardly got to know her in the end. This isn’t days of our lives.” I said slowly, “In real life it doesn’t automatically work out. Plus, I don’t really have a good track record with relationships.” I added with a little bit too much emphasis on my past.
“You don’t have to tell me that. I’ve seen how terrible you are at keeping girls. It’s not that there’s something wrong with you, really.” She said with a laugh, “It’s just you seem to push them away for one reason or another. Generally those reasons are pathetic. Maybe it comes down to you being afraid to commit to anyone unless they are perfect?” She continued, “Are you going to do the same with this girl or are you actually going to try and get somewhere?” She said strongly, “I don’t want to help you if you’re not willing to try for a change. I love you little brother, but you are seriously an ass with women at times.” She said, looking me square in the eye as she said it. I couldn’t look away as every point she raised resonated deep within me. She was completely right, and I knew it.
“You’re right.” I said, slowly nodding my head. “You’ve hit the nail on the head. So what am I meant to do?” I asked, as I looked at Sarah seriously.
“Firstly, you have to stop rushing things so much. If something is meant to happen, you should let it take its course and not try to be so forceful.” She started. I began to nod, “That’s advice for any relationship. You think everything with Alex and I has been perfect? We’ve had our fair share of arguments, and a fair few of them have been very heated, but we showed each other patience. Because deep down no matter what happens, at the end of the day we love one another,” She said passionately, “So we take the time to work out our differences. You need to learn to communicate, James. Unfortunately the world doesn’t work like it does in the movies, and it doesn’t magically just happen. You have to be willing to work on a relationship.” She said, her voice still rich with passion as she finished. Sighing
heavily, she stared at me expecting a response.
“What do I say to that? I can’t argue your point as it makes perfect sense.” I started, “I mean it’s always made perfect sense to me, but whenever it comes down to it, I guess it’s been easier for me to run away. To make the easy choice.” I said shaking my head, “Even now thinking about it it’s frustrating.” I added, not knowing what else to say. Instead, I started to study my hands.
“If you just take the easy option every time James, you’ll never achieve anything in life. Not just relationships. Whatever you do you need to work hard towards it, and set your sights on something you love. Don’t give up no matter what obstacles you come across.” She said firmly. Shaking her head softly, she finished, “If you are only going to take one thing away from this; never give up.”.
We sat together in silence for a moment as her words sank in. “I’ll try.” I finally replied.
“That’s all I ask. I want to see you succeed since you have so much potential, but you still tend to throw it away.” She replied, reaching over she gave me a hug. “Well that got deep very quickly didn’t it?” She said. Shattering the sombre mood we broke into laughter.
“You just wanted to lecture me no doubt.” I said, still laughing.
“Of course! Every chance I get.” She said with a satisfied smile, “If I’m not going to keep my little brother in line, who is?” She said as she tilted her head into the air haughtily, “So let’s write an email!” She added, as she sat down in front of the computer.
We stared at the screen brainstorming. “How about ‘Dear Amanda’, is that too much?” I asked, trying to get something started.
“No. That sounds way too formal! You’re twenty seven, not fifty seven. No. Let’s kick it off with plain and simple ‘Hi Amanda’. Yes, that will work best I think!” She said, as she wrote it down on the draft email.
For what was seemingly such a simple task we ended up staring at that screen for far too long arguing over tiny bits, and the way things sounded. In the end, all we had were a few sentences. It was casual, but after reading it a few times over, we seemed to agree the final product was ready to be sent. Thinking about all the effort that had gone into it, I couldn’t help but laugh. “What is it?” Sarah asked.
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