by Adele Niles
She sniffled softly. “You’re a great guy, but coming back here, seeing Ryker, it’s…a lot.”
I nodded slowly. “I get it.”
“I don’t want to hurt you.”
“I’ll be okay.” It was going to hurt. Hell, I was hurting already. I wished I was anywhere but listening to her break things off. It wasn’t fair—we hadn’t even gotten a proper start to our relationship.
“But you’re really sweet, and you’re really good in bed, and…”
I smiled at her. “Hey. It’s okay, Bailey.”
I put my free hand on top of hers.
She lowered her head, sniffling again. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry. It’s all right. You gotta take care of yourself first, you know?”
She looked up at me, her eyes wet with tears.
I just smiled. “It’s okay, Bailey. I get it. Maybe we can just hang out sometimes, huh? Be friends?”
She hesitated, but nodded. “Yeah. It’s too soon for me to be feeling like this, you know?”
“I get it,” I said, inwardly wincing. This sucked.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.”
“Okay.” She pulled her hand out from between mine and took a long drink of her beer.
I understood where she was coming from, but understanding didn’t make it hurt any less.
Chapter Fourteen
Bailey
I left after I finished my beer, driving home alone.
Garrett had been so sweet, but I knew he was probably hurting. I knew I was.
I should’ve stuck to my guns. I shouldn’t have let Jackie convince me to get with him, especially after I’d told her I didn’t want to jump into a relationship.
I hadn’t even wanted to jump into a casual fling. I’d wanted to settle in, be single for a while. Deal with Ryker on my own terms, not rush that so I could feel like I had permission to sleep with another man.
Because that’s what this was about.
I felt like I needed his blessing to move on with my life.
I didn’t sleep at all. My thoughts ran in circles all night. I wanted to apologize to Garrett; I wanted to find a way to stop letting Ryker control my life. I wanted to convince myself that Ryker’s opinion and thoughts were irrelevant.
I was my own person. I could sleep with Garrett if I wanted. I could sleep with the whole crew at No Regrets if I wanted.
But I was so worried about what Ryker would think.
This wasn’t like me at all.
I gave up on sleeping when the sun came up, and headed for the kitchen. I made coffee and breakfast—French toast with bacon, enough for me and Jackie, both, even though she wasn’t awake yet.
I took my plate to the back deck and sat down, sighing heavily.
This sucked.
It sucked to have hurt someone I cared about, and it sucked to be torn up about it.
It sucked to regret coming back here.
Maybe I should have stayed out west. I could have found a place to stay in New Mexico, or maybe Nevada. Somewhere hot and sunny and rugged.
I could have avoided all of this crap with men.
They really did ruin everything.
I couldn’t let this happen again. No matter how good a guy looked, I couldn’t let myself get tangled up in anything else.
And when I was ready to finally date again? Well, I was staying away from tattoo artists altogether.
Maybe even writing off guys with any ink.
I sat outside for a while after I finished eating. I didn’t realize how much time had passed until Jackie opened the door.
“Bailey?” she asked. “You okay?”
I shrugged.
She came out to the porch, a cup of coffee in one hand and her plate in the other. She sat down beside me, frowning. “You were up early.”
“I didn’t sleep.”
“What?” She frowned, cutting off a bite of her French toast.
I sighed. “Yeah, I didn’t sleep at all.”
“Why?”
I frowned. “I broke up with Garrett.”
Jackie lifted her head, looking at me with wide eyes. “Wait, what?”
“Yeah.”
“Why?”
“Because…it just…it was too soon, and with Ryker, and…”
“Oh my God, Bailey. You can’t worry about what Ryker thinks.”
“It’s his coworker, though!”
“So? He’s got a new girl. You’re allowed to have a new guy.”
I sighed and looked away. “I don’t know, I just don’t like this, Jackie. I don’t think it’s right. Especially after he was such a jackass yesterday.”
“I know, but like…hear me out.”
“I’m listening.”
“Screw him,” she said.
“No. Never again.” I couldn’t help my smirk.
Jackie rolled her eyes.
I went on, “He was a big part of my life for a long time. I can’t just ignore him.”
“Yeah, but he didn’t care if you’d be upset when he got a new girlfriend. Why do his feelings matter so much to you?”
I shrugged. “I just feel bad about before, and I want things to be easy.”
“Well, I hate to break it to you, but nothing is easy.” Jackie smiled, reaching to pat my hand. “It sucks. It’s hard. It’s hard to date and it’s hard to care about people. And you need to think about what you want. Not what you think some guy you haven’t talked to in five years wants for you.”
God, I hated when she was right.
I leaned back in my chair, closing my eyes. “Okay, but what if I do care what he thinks?”
“Why? Do you still have a thing for him?”
“God, no.”
“So it doesn’t matter. You’re just being a pushover.”
“I am not,” I said, glaring at her.
“You are. Because you’re letting a guy that isn’t into you dictate your next relationship.”
Did she really have to keep hitting the nail on the head like that?
I sighed again. “Okay. I just need to think. For a while.”
Jackie nodded. “Well, let me finish my breakfast, and then I’m out of your hair, okay? I gotta get to work soon, anyway.”
“Okay. I’ll probably be in the bath for a while. Or out here.”
“Have fun. And call if you need me, okay?”
“Okay.” I smiled faintly. “Have a good one.”
“You, too.”
Once she left and I cleaned up the kitchen, I went back to my room, falling back into bed.
This time, I managed to fall asleep.
Chapter Fifteen
Garrett
Bailey wasn’t talking to me at all anymore.
I’d texted her when I got home from the bar, just to make sure she was home safe.
No response.
I’d tried again this morning—Hey, just wanted to make sure you’re okay. Hope you’re feeling all right.
Nothing.
I didn’t want to be upset, but dammit, I was.
And when Ryker walked into the shop, my anger suddenly had a target.
Because dammit, if he wasn’t such a jerk, this wouldn’t be happening. I wouldn’t have lost out on a girl I really cared about.
I glared as he walked up to his station.
He didn’t even look my way.
Why did he have to be such an ass all the time?
Why were women always falling over themselves to get with him? Yeah, he was super macho-looking and dressed nice, but so did a lot of other guys in Richland.
I’d never really wanted to fight a guy before, but today, I was in the mood.
I looked at Ryker. He stood with his back to me, working in his station.
“Hey.”
He turned his head. “Oh, shit. Hey, man. Sorry, I was in my own world. How’re you?”
I shrugged. “Been better.”
“Oh. Everything okay? Or…”
I frowned. �
��So…that girl.”
“Who?”
“The girl that was here yesterday,” I said. “To talk to you.”
“Bailey?” He raised his eyebrows.
“Yeah.”
“What about her?”
I shrugged. “She’s hot.”
Ryker snorted. “Don’t even, dude.”
I looked up. “Why? Like, she’s really gorgeous. I’m a sucker for pretty brown eyes.”
“There’s history there. I don’t want any of you messing with her.”
I scowled. “You can’t have Sydney and Bailey, both.”
“I don’t want Bailey. But I don’t want her with you.”
I stood up.
The door opened.
Bradley walked in, Zoe right behind him.
I didn’t care. This was happening now.
“You can’t tell her who she can and can’t be with,” I said.
“What the hell? Why do you care so much? It’s not like you even know her! She just got back to town.” He threw his hands up, shaking his head. “Just shut up, Garrett. Fuck.”
“No. No, I do know her. I know she’s smart, and she’s fun. She likes animals and camping and she loves traveling. She’s gorgeous and sexy.”
“Garrett—”
“I’m not done,” I snapped.
Bradley stood at the bottom of the stairs, looking up at us.
I was pretty sure I heard him mumble something. It sounded a lot like, “Dammit, Garrett.”
I didn’t care.
I didn’t care about anything but making Ryker understand that he couldn’t control a girl he wasn’t with.
“You have this girl who came back here to try and get some closure on a bad chapter of her life, and you just treated her like shit. She cares about you. She cares about you and your feelings enough to come in here and try to smooth things over.”
Ryker came over the wall at me.
And for a second, I thought that maybe I’d really messed up.
He lunged, grabbing me by the shirt collar.
My back hit the wall.
Bradley and Zoe were both stumbling up the stairs, trying to get to us.
Ryker bumped me against the wall—not enough to hurt, just enough to remind me that he was bigger and stronger than me.
“You stay the hell away from Bailey. Got it? Don’t go fucking near her.”
“Fuck you!” I moved to take a swing at him.
And he was suddenly out of reach, Bradley and Zoe both holding him back.
“Garrett, get the hell out of here,” Bradley snapped. “Walk your ass down to Bakeology and wait for me.”
I ducked around the three of them and hurried off.
And as I did, I could hear Ryker shouting after me.
“Stay the hell away from her, Garrett! I swear to god, if you go near her—”
The door slammed shut, cutting him off, but I could guess the threats that came after.
* * * * *
Kenzie didn’t say anything—she just brought me a cup of coffee and put it in front of me. A moment later, Lora appeared with one of her rum cupcakes.
I bit into it, scowling.
Ten minutes later, Bradley walked into the shop. He waved at Lora and Kenzie, but didn’t stop to chat. Instead, he came right over to sit down at the table across from me.
“Garrett.”
“Bradley.”
“What the hell was that?” he asked.
“You told me to handle the situation.”
“I said not in my shop.”
“You weren’t there.”
Bradley sighed heavily. Lora approached the table, putting down a coffee and a cupcake for him, too.
He touched her hand, just for a minute.
I hated how jealous I felt.
I folded my arms on the table, shaking my head.
Bradley leaned back, watching me. “C’mon, dude. Talk.”
“I just—I hate him.”
“You don’t. You’re pissed off. You don’t hate anyone.”
“Okay, fine. I’m pissed off.”
“Why?”
“Because I like Bailey. I want to go out with her. I don’t want him to make her feel like she can’t be with me.”
“And you thought yelling at him was gonna get your point across?”
I huffed, shrugging. “I just…shit. I’m pissed. I wasn’t thinking.”
“Obviously.”
“Shut up, Bradley.”
“No, I’m gonna make sure you know that you messed this one up.”
“Fine.” I picked up my cupcake and took a bite.
Bradley sipped his coffee.
I hung my head. “She broke up with me. Because of him. Because he was such a jerk when she came by. And now he’s acting like he gets to decide who she dates.”
“I do that with Kenzie.”
“It’s different, man. She’s your sister. Not your ex.”
Bradley shrugged.
I shook my head. “Look, it’s not fair. He can’t keep controlling her. He can’t control me.”
“He shouldn’t,” Bradley said. “But what are you gonna do about it?”
“I mean, nothing. If Bailey doesn’t want to try…”
“So why aren’t you mad at her?”
“Because the only reason she said no is Ryker!”
Bradley leaned toward me. “Garrett, look. You gotta figure this out. I won’t have two of my guys fighting in the shop. Especially not over a woman.”
I shut my eyes. “Do you think…do you think he still loves her?”
Bradley raised his eyebrows. “No. I don’t. But I think he cares about her and doesn’t want to admit it.”
“Then the problem is him.”
“Is it?”
“Well, yeah. If he wasn’t being a dick—”
Bradley held a hand up and I fell silent.
“He thought she was the one,” Bradley said. “He thought they were good, and then she skipped town. He’s got a lot of anger and sadness about her. And he’s gotta deal with that.” He shook his head. “Take the rest of the day off. Get your head clear and figure out what you want to do.”
“What do you mean?”
“Think about whether you think you can still work around Ryker. Think about whether Bailey is really worth all this.” He patted my shoulder, then rose and turned toward the counter.
He wanted to talk to Lora.
And I wanted to get the hell out of here.
I rose and left the shop, taking my coffee and cupcake with me.
Chapter Sixteen
Bailey
I got the text and groaned.
Almost got in a fight with Ryker. Just wanted to tell you. I’ll leave you alone now.
Dammit, Garrett.
I sighed, rolling over on the couch. I’d dozed off watching true crime documentaries and had weird dreams—my own fault, really. And now I was waking up to this, and a terrible headache.
I always got headaches after a long cry.
I sat up and sighed heavily.
This wasn’t easy for either of us. I knew he was struggling, but getting into a fight with Ryker was stupid.
I hadn’t replied to any of Garrett’s texts so far, but I couldn’t let this one go.
Are you serious? What the hell were you thinking?
Clearly I wasn’t. Bradley said the same thing.
At least somebody in that shop thinks, I wrote back. What a couple of jerks—him and Ryker, both.
Really don’t need you being like this, too.
I rolled my eyes.
Why was he being such a baby when he was the only reason there was a problem?
I put my phone down and walked away, going to the kitchen. I poured a glass of iced tea and took a long sip.
I had to figure this out fast. Before Garrett ended up in the hospital.
My phone went off again, but I just let it chime. I had to clear my head before I could work through this. I went into the back yard
with my glass of tea and a blanket from my bed. I spread the blanket out and lay in the grass, my eyes closed.
I had to work it out. On my own. With nobody else telling me what to think or feel.
I wanted this to end with everyone happy. That’s what mattered most. I didn’t want Ryker to hurt, I didn’t want Garrett to hurt, and I sure as hell didn’t want to be hurt myself.
But what happened if I removed Ryker from the picture? He had a girlfriend, and from what I kept hearing, they were happy.
If I didn’t factor in Ryker, it was just me and Garrett.
And I knew I liked him.
I wanted to let my feelings for him develop. I wanted to get to know him better. I wanted to really care about him, and I wanted him to be a part of my life.
And why should I deny myself happiness because of someone else? If Ryker was pissed off, well, that was on him. That was for him and his new girl to deal with, not me.
At the end of the day, it didn’t matter whether he liked it or not.
I needed to move on with my life. I needed to find some happiness of my own, and he needed to focus on his happiness.
I needed to get in touch with Garrett, and for the right reasons this time.
But first…a little cloud-watching.
For the soul.
* * * * *
We met at the same bar as always.
I got there first—like usual—and found the bar packed. But nobody we knew was here, and there were two stools open at the bar.
I sat in one and put my bag in the other.
A few minutes later, I felt a hand on my shoulder.
I turned and saw Garrett.
He looked handsome as ever, in a pair of dark wash jeans and a red t-shirt that showed off the ink on his arms. He also looked nervous.
But I smiled and moved my bag, letting him sit down. “Hey.”
“Hey.”
He waved for the bartender and ordered two beers. Then he turned to me, giving me a nervous smile.
“It’s okay,” I said gently. “This is a good conversation, I promise.”
“Not breakup part two?”
I laughed, shaking my head. “Not breakup part two.”
He exhaled, visibly relaxing.
God, he was almost as nervous as me.
“I just… wanted to talk. Because I did some thinking, and… and I might have made some decisions without thinking about myself first.”
“Oh.” Garrett nodded. “Okay, um… what… what are you thinking?”