He tore his lips from hers and shifted just enough to see her face. The slight glow from the porch light filtered in through the window, slashing just enough of a beam across her face for him to fully appreciate her pleasure.
“Look at me,” he commanded, squeezing her hip.
Those black eyes immediately locked onto his and a second later she cried out. That’s exactly what he’d been waiting on. Seeing her come apart in his arms, knowing he was the one who made her lose control was all he wanted. Her hips quickened as she came apart and that’s all it took to have him joining her.
Hayes’s body trembled as he fisted one hand on the door beside her head and continued to hold on to her hip. His knee was starting to shake from being too weak, but hell if he’d give in now.
Alexa ran her fingertips up and down his back, his arms, murmuring something in Spanish as he came down from the tremors. Resting his forehead against hers, he pulled in a breath of sweet jasmine...the same scent she’d tortured him with all night.
“Do you have the energy to get to the bedroom?” she asked.
Hayes laughed. “If it’s not far. Or we could sleep here on the floor.”
“Let me down,” she told him, untangling her legs from his waist. “Your knee has to be hurting.”
He stepped back and said nothing.
“Exactly,” she confirmed. “You shifted too much and kept fisting your hand by my head. Get in bed and rest that.”
Hayes instantly lifted her up and over his shoulder.
“Put me down,” she cried, smacking his back. “Hayes, your leg is going to give out and we’ll both be down.”
“Like hell,” he growled. “I’ll rest it when we get in there. Better yet, you can give me a rubdown. Now tell me where the bedroom is.”
“Last door on the right.”
He palmed her backside, earning him another laugh from her. Damn, that laugh made everything seem so right, so perfect. Could such happiness be his for the taking? Alexa had lost her husband and never claimed to be looking for a relationship. Hell, he hadn’t either, but the idea of letting her go, the thought of another man even touching her settled a new level of rage within him.
She also hadn’t mentioned wanting or even needing a man to fill the role of daddy to her son. Maybe that’s not something she wanted at all. It was one thing to be involved in an affair, but quite another to become a family.
Hayes’s eyes had gotten used to the darkness and the small night-light glowing from Mason’s bedroom across the hall lit up enough for him to make out the shape of her bed. Hayes dropped her on the end and instantly was on her.
“I’ll take that rubdown in a bit,” he told her as he covered her body with his. “First I’m going to show you exactly how thankful I am that you went with me tonight.”
* * *
Alexa stretched, smiling when her body protested. She was sore in the most glorious ways. The sun shone through the sheers of her room and one thick arm draped across her midsection. How could she not wake up with a smile on her face after last night?
She was glad she’d let Mason stay over with Sadie. Alexa knew they’d get home late and didn’t want to put Sadie out too much...or more than she already was. But Sadie was so happy that Alexa was going on a date, she’d eagerly volunteered to watch Mason all night.
Hayes shifted and groaned, and his heavy leg slid over hers. The coarse hairs made her shiver. Who knew all the little things she missed from a man’s touch? Obviously, he was the first man in this bed since Scott...but Alexa didn’t feel like this was wrong in any way.
That’s how she knew it was time to come clean about who her husband was.
She flattened her hand over Hayes’s arm and slid it up and over his shoulder. Keeping her eyes on his face, she watched as his lids fluttered. His hold on her tightened as he pulled her closer.
“Stop, temptress,” he mumbled.
Alexa couldn’t help but laugh. “You slept good.”
“I’d keep sleeping if you weren’t feeling me up.”
Shifting in his arms, Alexa nipped at his chin. “I believe I woke with your bare arm over my midsection and then you wrapped your leg around me. You want to be felt up.”
Hayes slid his hand over her bare hip and settled on the dip in her waist. Alexa’s body instantly responded, but then he curled those fingers in and started tickling her.
“Hayes,” she squealed. “Stop that.”
A cell started ringing somewhere in the house. She didn’t recognize the tone, so it must be his. She smacked at his arms as he continued to tickle her. He wrestled her beneath him as she continued to wriggle around and try to dodge the torture.
“Your cell,” she panted, trying to breathe. “It’s... Stop that. It’s ringing.”
Hayes loomed over her, the widest smile on his face. She hadn’t seen him like that before. A smirk here and there, a naughty grin, sure. But a full-fledged genuine smile was staring back at her. Alexa’s heart tumbled over in her chest.
“What’s that look for?” he asked, resting his hands on either side of her head. “You were just laughing and now you look on the verge of tears.”
The cell stopped in the other room, silence once again settling around them.
“I haven’t been this happy in a long time.” She reached up, framed his face and stared into his eyes. “I didn’t think I could be, but you’ve done something to me. I wasn’t expecting this.”
“I—”
His cell went off again. With a sigh, he eased off her and turned to head from the room. He’d only taken two steps when he froze. His shoulders tensed and Alexa followed his line of vision.
Her heart immediately sank. How could she have forgotten about that photo? The wedding picture of her and Scott had sat so long on her dresser, and she hadn’t been able to remove it after his death. Then she just...didn’t.
The cell continued to ring, the only thing breaking through the heavy tension. Hayes slowly made his way to the silver frame and picked it up. Alexa sat up in the bed, pulling the comforter up and under her arms.
“Were you ever going to tell me?” he asked.
Alexa closed her eyes, not wanting to see his face when he turned around. She was a coward—clearly.
“I didn’t know at first,” she said. “Then I didn’t think we’d see each other anymore.”
When he didn’t say anything, Alexa risked looking up, but wished she hadn’t. Hayes stood at the end of her bed, clutching the picture in one hand and staring at her as if he hadn’t just been with her all night, as if everything up until this point had been a lie.
“What’s your excuse for all the times you’ve seen me since then?” he asked.
“I have no excuse,” she muttered, picking at the thread on the comforter. “I was going to tell you, but I didn’t know how. When you first mentioned his name, I was so shocked. Then I knew what we had was temporary so I figured I would keep it to myself and not make things awkward. Plus, talking about Scott with you seemed wrong, like if I started opening up about him too much it would seem like I was ready to move on and I didn’t know if I was.”
The muscle ticked in his jaw. The cell stopped, then started seconds later, and finally stopped again.
“Then when you showed up at my house and we fell back into...well, us, I didn’t know what to say. I hadn’t expected to see you again and I was afraid if I said anything you’d see it as betrayal. There was no good time, Hayes.”
She wanted him to look at her so she could see his eyes, to hopefully get a glimpse of what he was thinking, feeling.
“I didn’t want you hurt any more,” she whispered. “I care for you. You have to know that.”
Hayes cursed and sat the picture at the end of the bed. He stared at it a moment before raking a hand through his messy hair.
He turned without looking
at her and stormed from her room. Alexa climbed out of bed and quickly pulled on a T-shirt and panties. As she headed down the hall, she saw Hayes holding the cell between his ear and his shoulder. He hopped from one foot to the other pulling on his pants.
“I’ll be there in five minutes.”
He shoved the cell in his pants pocket, grabbed his jacket and shoes without putting them on.
“My father had a stroke,” he told her without looking her way.
Alexa stepped forward. “I’ll drive—”
“No.” That sharp gaze of his cut to her. “You’re getting your wish. We don’t have to see each other anymore and then you won’t have to worry about telling me any more truths you conveniently forgot.”
Her heart broke, shattered. “Hayes.”
He jerked on the door and stepped out, not bothering to spare her one last glance. The door didn’t slam, but the final click resonated throughout the open space.
Wrapping her arms around her midsection, Alexa stared at the door. He was gone. She’d done this. Had he not seen that picture, had she told him the minute she realized who his best friend had been, she would probably be with him now.
Who would be there for him? How bad off was his father? Alexa knew how much his family meant to him and knew how fragile his father’s health had been.
How would Hayes cope? With all the ugliness he’d experienced, Alexa prayed he wouldn’t lose his father.
She padded back to the bedroom, stopping just inside the bedroom door to look at the messed-up bed and the image of her and Scott on their wedding day.
It didn’t matter that he’d told her he didn’t want to see her again; she had to explain herself. Not that she had much defense, but she had to go to him. She couldn’t let him believe she’d set out on betrayal. Plus, she needed to check on him regarding his father.
Tonight, she’d go to him and pray she hadn’t lost this second chance she’d been given. How often did anyone get another shot at love? She’d been so afraid before, too scared to even think about opening her heart, but not anymore. Hayes had taught her all about courage and just how strong she was.
To think she’d been worried about having a man in Mason’s life. There was no better man to fill the role of father to her sweet son. Hayes might be afraid, but she wasn’t going to let him hide and she wasn’t going to let him think for a second that she’d hurt him on purpose.
She would make him see that she loved him, that they belonged together...that they were a family.
Sixteen
“He’s going to be all right.”
Hayes had barely gotten into the waiting room when Piper, Nolan’s wife, delivered the news.
“The doctor said the damage is minor from what they can tell, but they are keeping him.”
Hayes breathed easily for what felt like the first time in an hour. Between the news of his father and Alexa...
No. He couldn’t think of her. Not here when he was surrounded by his family.
“Why are you in uniform?”
Hayes turned at Colt’s voice. “I didn’t go home last night,” Hayes explained.
“And you were out somewhere that required a uniform?”
Colt crossed his arms over his chest as Nolan came up behind him wearing his scrubs. Most likely his brother had been on call when they’d brought their father in.
“I had a ceremony I had to attend.” They didn’t need to know any more. He’d tell them about the award later, but right now they had more pressing matters. “What’s going on with Dad?”
“He was slurring his speech with the nurse at the assisted living facility and had some paralysis on his right side,” Nolan explained. “She called the squad to bring him in and they ran some tests, did an ultrasound of his carotid. It’s a minor stroke and we won’t know more until the days progress, but he’s going to be all right.”
How was any of this all right? His father suffered from dementia and now he’d had a minor stroke? Hayes felt like the only stable world he’d known was crumbling around him.
“Can I see him?”
Nolan nodded. “He’s not supposed to have visitors, but I requested an exception. Only a couple minutes. Room 108. It’s at the end of the hall.”
Hayes nodded and started to push past his brothers. Colt reached out and gripped Hayes’s arm.
“After this, we want to know what you were doing,” he murmured, probably so the ladies couldn’t hear. “You wanted so far away from the Army, to forget what happened, and you show up in uniform after a ceremony? Something isn’t jibing.”
Hayes jerked his arm away and continued down the hall toward his father’s room. He stopped just outside the door, pulling in a deep breath and trying to prepare himself for what he might see.
As he rounded the corner, Hayes zeroed in on his frail father lying in the bed, his head turned away. His thinning, silver hair had been smoothed back. There was once a time this man never went without his black hat. He’d been robust, strong, the rock of their entire family. Now that duty fell to the four boys...well, three when they removed Beau from the equation.
Hayes needed to make sure someone contacted Beau just as soon as he was done here.
As Hayes moved closer, his father shifted and turned his way. A ghost of a smile slid across his lips.
“Hey, Dad.”
“Hayes.”
Relief like he’d never known crashed through him. “You remember me.”
“For now.” His father’s eyes filled with tears. “I’m sorry, son. I—I hate the b-burden I’ve become.”
Hayes eased a hip on the edge of the bed and took his father’s worn hand. “You’re not a burden. You’re our father and we’ll do anything for you.”
“I raised good b-boys,” he stuttered, then narrowed his gaze. “U-uniform?”
“Long story,” Hayes stated, then found that he wanted to share it. He wanted to have a moment with his father because it might be the last. “I got an award last night. I was invited to the governor’s mansion to receive it.”
“That’s a-amazing. S-so proud...of you. Did your brothers g-go?”
Hayes shook his head and glanced to his father’s frail hand in his. “No. I didn’t tell them. I ended up taking a date.”
“Someone serious?”
“I thought she was,” Hayes admitted. “Not sure anymore.”
“Since last n-night?” his father questioned. “If you think...she is, d-don’t let her go.”
Hayes glanced back to his father. “Neither of us were looking for a relationship.”
His father attempted a smile and squeezed his hand. “Those are the best k-kind. Your mother and I w-weren’t, either. L-loved her more than anything. S-still do.”
Hayes didn’t want to think about this right now. He didn’t want to try to deal with Alexa and her reasons for keeping something so monumental from him while he was also worried about his father’s health.
He understood that she’d been stunned when he’d mentioned Scott’s name. That was understandable, but she’d had ample time to come to terms with the fact. She should’ve trusted what they had. She should’ve trusted him enough to tell him the truth.
He hadn’t just gotten involved with her, he’d gotten involved with Mason and thinking of both of them out of his life had a void settling deep in his heart.
“I should go and let you rest.” But he didn’t want to end this moment. Would his father even know who he was next time? “I love you, Dad.”
“Love you, Hayes.”
After placing a kiss on his father’s forehead, Hayes forced himself to leave the room. If that was the last time he heard his father say he loved him and call him by name, that would be enough. Hayes honestly hadn’t believed he’d get that again. Perhaps the uniform helped his father recognize him or perhaps his father just knew that
at this moment Hayes needed him now more than ever.
No matter the reasons, Hayes was thankful to have had those few minutes. He needed to check to see if anyone had contacted Beau and then he wanted to head home. There was too much swirling around his mind and he just wanted to be left alone.
Alone.
Ironic that was exactly what he’d wanted when he came home, but then he’d been enveloped by his brothers, their wives, their kids... Alexa and Mason.
The pain she’d left buried inside him wasn’t going away anytime soon. He knew she’d come to him, knew she’d want to defend herself. So he needed time to prepare his heart. Because as hard as he tried, his damn heart had gone and gotten involved. Now he had to figure out how the hell he was going to move on.
* * *
Maybe he should’ve saved some demo work because Hayes could sure have done some damage with the sledgehammer. Unfortunately, he was on the back end of the kitchen renovation and coming close to the finish.
In the past several days he’d gotten his cabinets installed. Countertops, backsplash and new appliances were to be installed next week. Now he was working on the lighting over the giant table that mocked him. He couldn’t look at the damn thing without seeing Alexa and her expression when she saw it.
For the last two nights he’d slept like hell and had pretty much kept to himself. He’d visited his father a couple times, but he’d reverted back inside his mind. Hayes knew he would, but there was still that sliver of hope each time he went that maybe there would be some remembrance.
When the back door opened, Hayes steeled himself for the slam. He turned just as the screen door hit and Nolan and Colt were standing there like a force...one he didn’t want to deal with right now.
“This must be important to get you both here at the same time.”
Nolan stepped in and glanced around. “You’ve done a lot with the place since I was here last.”
Hayes went back to screwing in the base for the light over the table. “That’s the goal.”
Taming the Texan Page 14