by T. S. Ryder
“I can’t get you out of my head, Min. You’re all I can think about, lately.”
“Be with me.” She pulled his shirt over his head and, fighting the embarrassment making her blood pound in her ears, she placed her mouth on his collarbone. She traced it with her tongue and he moaned.
Scooping her up, Devon carried her to the bedroom and laid her down on the bed. “Take off your dress.”
She thought about how it would feel to be so exposed in front of him and found the idea sent shivers of anticipation down her spine.
Could she be enough for Devon? Or would her inexperience turn him off?
Chapter Ten - Devon
While Devon stood at the foot of the bed, Mindy lifted her dress and slipped it over her head. Lacy pink panties and a bra prevented him from seeing the rest of her. He wanted them gone, but first, he wanted to touch her wearing her sexy lingerie.
He slid a hand up her thigh and she lay back, silent. Her eyes watched him, wide open. “Do you always wear such pretty things under your clothes?”
As he massaged her backside, she shivered. “They were a gift from you.”
“If I didn’t buy you lots more, we’re going shopping tomorrow.”
“I’m set for a bit. But if you find something you’d like to see me in, I might be willing to give it a try.”
He sat down on the bed and pulled her legs onto his lap. He was rock hard now, his cock straining against his jeans. “What else might you be willing to try?”
She looked down at her stomach, averting her gaze. “Anything, for you.”
“I want you so much, Min.” He slid a finger under the bottom of her panties, toying with her curls. “Let’s get you ready first.”
He pushed away all the thoughts crowding his mind about how he’d just make a mess of things down the road. Right now, in this moment, Mindy was all that mattered. If someone like her could love him, maybe there was hope he wouldn’t screw everything up.
He climbed his way up the bed to lie beside her. His hand rested on her stomach, as he pulled her close with the other. He took her mouth, kissing her thoroughly, letting his hand wander to tug the panties down. Breaking the kiss for a moment, he pulled them off, then went back to devouring her mouth.
His fingers slid down to slip between her folds and toy with her center. She gasped in his mouth.
“No one’s ever touched you, not even like this?”
“Never.” She closed her eyes as the sensations began to overwhelm her. He’d been with enough women to give her so much pleasure. He’d make sure this was special.
“Take off your pretty little bra, sweetheart.”
She reached a hand behind her back, undid the clasp and let it fall. Her breasts sprang free. Her nipples were a beautiful dusky pink, and he lowered his head to take one in his mouth.
Her body jerked under his attention, and he could tell by her ragged breathing she was close to orgasm. “Have you ever touched yourself? Made yourself come?”
“Nothing. Please don’t stop.”
“Kiss me while you come.” He captured her lips once again, one hand traveling up to toy with her breast. He slid a finger inside of her and his thumb massaged her center.
Her body began to quake, and she moaned deep as the orgasm ripped through her. She couldn’t kiss him, but she didn’t pull away, so he continued to kiss her until she stopped shaking.
“Oh, my God, Devon. Take your pants off and be inside me. I need you.”
“One orgasm and you’ve turned brazen.”
She slid her gaze away. “Don’t tease me, not now.”
“I tease you because you’re adorable when you blush.” He stood, unbuttoned his jeans, and took them off as fast as he could.
He climbed on top of her until her legs were on either side of his hips. He took them in his hands and tilted her hips up. “I’ll take it slow. Just relax, breathe, and trust me.”
“I trust you completely.”
Devon slid on a condom then seated himself near her entrance. Every part of him screamed out to plunge deep inside of her, but he took his time, inch by delicious inch until she was everywhere around him.
“You okay?”
“It’s a little uncomfortable. But it feels really good.” She tilted her hips up and he hissed.
“Do that too many times and we’ll be done before we’re even started.”
She did it again, a playful smile on her face. “Good. I want to know how to make you feel good.”
“How about you try moving, find a rhythm you like.” He pushed her hair out of her face, grazing his fingertips across her cheek.
“I wouldn’t know how.” A line of worry appeared in her brow.
“I’ll show you.” He took her hips in his hands, moving her toward him, all around him.
She started to take the initiative, moving of her own volition. When she threw her arms above her head and writhed beneath him, he began to pump his hips back and forth.
“Yes, Devon. Never stop,” she panted.
Their gazes met and he locked onto her face. She closed her eyes and throbbed around him. He plunged himself inside of her as they came together.
As he collapsed beside her, pulling her into his arms, he couldn’t remember a time when he’d been happier.
Chapter Eleven - Mindy
Mindy smiled at Devon from her spot offstage. She wore jeans and an emerald green off the shoulder blouse. She had no desire to be famous, but she loved dressing up for Devon.
Two months had passed since the first time they’d made love. Two months and three blissful days. So far, her brother hadn’t figured out they were a real couple in private, as well as in public. And no one else, besides Chet, their manager, had known this was anything but real, anyway.
They could hold hands, hug, kiss—all without the concern of being called out by her brother. She didn’t know what Bret would do if he found out. For sure try to kill Devon because he’d taken her innocence. At least, that’s how Bret would see it.
She didn’t care. She’d tell Bret when they took a break from the road. Devon would be home in L.A. and Bret would follow her home to visit with their mother, back in Indiana.
There was only one thing keeping her from nearly floating away with happiness. She was late. She’d had the car drive her to a drug store while they were doing a sound check and she’d picked up a home pregnancy test. It was probably nothing. She and Devon always used a condom. What were the odds that she’d gotten pregnant with protection?
Devon ran offstage and lifted her in a big hug. He looked into her face and put her down. “What’s wrong?”
Bret walked by and mumbled, “Give it a rest, you two.”
Taking her hand, Devon pulled her to the side. “No, really, what’s up? Did I do something?”
He was always asking that as if he could do anything wrong.
“Everything is perfect,” she said. She kissed him but restrained herself. Bret was still around somewhere.
“Let’s go back to the hotel. We’ve got a few hours before the show tonight,” he said.
“I wish we weren’t going home in a few days.” She took his hand and followed him out to the car.
Inside, he offered her a water and she took it, swallowing deep.
“I wish you’d let me come with you, be there when you tell your brother.” He tugged her onto his lap and she was more than happy to let him, more than willing to be close to him.
“You never come to Indiana. Besides, he’s going to be upset enough. Especially when I tell him I’m coming back on the road with you and taking online classes. He’ll say I’m wasting my life. He says none of this is real.”
He snuggled his face into her neck. “He’s right. It could be gone tomorrow.”
A small part of her was scared that she was giving up so much to be with Devon, but she’d loved him for so long. What could she do but take the chance and be with him? It wasn’t like he could drop everything to go back to college with he
r. He had a life. He was her life.
When she got back to the hotel room, she’d sneak into the bathroom, slip the test out of her purse, and take it. Reassure herself that it was negative, and they could get on with their lives.
Chapter Twelve - Devon
Devon didn’t understand why Mindy was acting so strange the last day or so. She’d literally gone from being happy and telling him he was her everything, to quiet and distracted.
He couldn’t help but think that he’d screwed up somehow.
After the show, he’d taken a pass for them both from the ever-present party. Every city, dozens of women. That life was so old and tired for him. All he wanted now was to be with Mindy. He’d fallen for her so hard in the last few months. He loved her, he knew that now.
Mindy led him into the hotel room. “I’m really tired tonight, baby.”
“Okay. Let’s go to bed then.”
“There’s no need for you to miss out on partying with the guys before you head home. I’m just going to go to bed. I’ve been really tired the last few days.”
He pulled her close, wrapping her in his hold. “So you’d rather I go upstairs to the party than stay here with you?”
“Don’t put it that way. I know how important the band is to you, and soon you’ll be on break and won’t be seeing the guys as much.”
He let his arms fall to his side. What had he done wrong?
All he knew was that Mindy had become the most important thing in his life, and suddenly she was pushing him away. He’d known this day would come, in the back of his head. He covered the hurt with a laugh. “Sure, I’ll go party for a few hours. Sleep well, sweetheart.”
She looked so relieved, and that hurt his pride even more.
Upstairs, he grabbed a vodka, then another, and found a quiet corner to relax. He sat back as his guys hooked up with different women, sometimes more than one, and wandered in and out of the bedrooms in the suite. What the hell was wrong with them that they needed this scene every night after a show?
Sure, it was hard to come off the adrenaline high of playing before thousands upon thousands of screaming fans. He knew that. But he’d found his peace in Mindy. What was up with her?
Or, more to the point, what did he do wrong? He knew what he had to do now, as much as he hated it. He had to give her the distance she obviously craved. Maybe she was getting sick of him, maybe not. He sure as hell hoped not.
Someone brought him a vodka and cranberry juice and he downed it quickly.
He was sick with worry, and, damn it, what else could he do but protect himself? If she wanted space, he’d give it to her.
That night, when he stumbled his way downstairs, he fell onto the couch and passed out. It was ironic, he thought before the blackness took him. It was almost like he was right back where he’d started.
Chapter Thirteen - Mindy
Mindy sat on the bed, half dressed, and tried to think beyond the booming in her head. She was pregnant. She’d taken the test two days ago and it had been positive.
She didn’t know which way to turn next. Devon seemed distant; he’d slept on the couch last night, passed out from drinking too much. Since they’d been together, he’d never done that.
She pulled out a dress without really looking at it. It was white. Innocent, which was a laugh at this point. She was no longer innocent, and she had a baby growing inside of her to show for it. Devon’s baby.
He’d never want to be tied down this way. He’d grow to resent her. She’d always worried she wouldn’t be enough to keep him happy. Now, he’d believe she was trying to trap him into marriage because that’s what her brother would insist upon.
It’d be marry her or lose the band.
Tomorrow, she’d be home with Bret and her mom, and she’d have to think of a way to tell them. She wouldn’t even tell Bret the baby was Devon’s. But, no. That wouldn’t work. He’d know she’d never take a chance on sneaking off for a quickie with some roadie.
She zipped herself into her dress and set about doing her makeup. If she didn’t make Bret swear to secrecy, he would tell Devon about the baby. Devon had known she was a virgin. There would be no question who the father was. Then he might even feel obliged to be with her, to take care of them both.
Pity from the man she loved was the last thing she wanted. She put down the eyeliner pencil and struggled not to cry. How was it possible she’d had everything she ever wanted, and now it was just falling away?
She blotted her eyes with a tissue then went back to lining them. Refusing to cry, she decided she’d be thankful for the time she had with Devon. It was a dream come true for her. And then she’d get on with her life as a young mother.
Single mother at twenty-one. How could this be happening to her? She picked up the mascara to finish off her makeup and began to apply it in slow, even strokes.
She’d simply take the rest of her classes online and stay at home with her mother. Mom would be happy to help, once the initial shock wore off.
There, all made up for her last day on the road. She didn’t even have the guts to tell Devon it was over. He’d ask why and she couldn’t be honest with him. Best to let Bret tell him when they went back on tour and she wasn’t there.
Devon strolled into the bathroom where Mindy’s cosmetics were spread all over the counter. “Having a woman around sure is cluttered.” He offered a tight smile over her shoulder and she held a hand out to him. This was their last night together. She intended to make sure it was one neither of them would forget.
He stepped forward and took her hand. She kissed his fingers and lifted her gaze to his face. “You know I love you, right?”
“Sure. I feel the same way.” Even that. He’d never come out and told her he’d loved her. He’d say that, or “back at you,” or “me, too.” He wasn’t ready to start a family with her. He was barely ready to be in a relationship with her.
For her heart, and the sake of the baby, she had to leave and never come back.
That night, after the concert, they made love. When it was all over, and she lay curled up in Devon’s arms, she couldn’t keep the tears from flowing.
“Hey” —he caressed her cheek, wiping the tears away— “why are you crying? Tell me what’s going on in your head.”
Burying her face in his neck, she pulled him closer. “Just hold me, all night.”
“I’ll hold you every night, if that’s what you want, Min.”
She nodded, skin-to-skin. It was exactly what she wanted, and she wished for the thousandth time that this had happened down the road, later, so that she could know if he really wanted to be with her or would just be doing what everyone told him he had to do.
He’d needed to date a girl-next-door to clean up his image. If she ended up pregnant, his record label, his manager, even her brother would insist that he marry her. He didn’t need a scandal of this magnitude, or they’d undo everything they had accomplished for his career.
She’d never know if he wanted her and the baby or if he’d do it just to keep his contract and his band together. If she disappeared from his life, no one had to know the baby she had was his. No one would even bother to come looking for her. She’d be a blip on the radar, that one chick Devon Jennings had dated for a couple of months. At least it had been real. She could console herself on the long, lonesome evenings ahead of her with that.
Chapter Fourteen - Mindy
The plane ride home was quiet. Mindy didn’t know how to start talking to Bret about Devon. He’d go ballistic, she knew that, and on a plane that might get him in trouble with security.
They rented a car at the airport. They only had a little luggage to put in the trunk. Mindy had shipped most of her new clothes to her mother’s house. Not that it mattered. Before long, she wouldn’t even be able to fit in them. Even now, the waistband of her jeans dug into her stomach.
Mindy climbed into the passenger seat. Bret turned the ignition and the sports car roared to life. She touched his hands an
d tears sprang to her eyes. She wanted to tell him before they got home so he could help her open up to her mother. Mom would be so disappointed that Mindy had altered the course of her life in such a drastic way.
“I have to tell you something, Bret.”
He turned to face her, the car idling in the background. “Min, what’s wrong?”
“Everything.” She began to sob and it took her a moment to get hold of herself. He put an arm around her and pulled her closer to his side of the car.
“Okay, I have to tell you something and you have to promise to not get mad.”
“At you? Why would I be mad at you?”
“Not at me.” She sniffled and leaned back so she could face him. “At Devon.”
“Damn it, he didn’t! Did he touch you?” Bret’s face turned bright red and his hands clenched into fists.
“It’s more than that. We’ve been having a relationship. Pretty much the entire time.”
Bret punched the steering wheel, over and over. “I’m going to kill him.”
“It wasn’t his fault, Bret. I pushed for it. I… I’m in love with him. I always have been.”
“I know that, Min. Everyone knew that. Devon had to know, too, so he took advantage of your feelings for him.”
Mindy brushed the hair from her face and pulled a wadded up tissue from her purse. She’d been crying so much lately. “He didn’t take advantage of me. I was going to take my courses online and go back on the road with him.”
“But, what? He dumped you?” He shook his head and faced her again. He put a hand on her leg. “I’m sorry, that was a jackass thing to say. What changed? You said you were going back on the road with him.”
“First I need your promise. What I’m about to tell you, you can never tell anyone, never talk to anyone about it, except, well, Mom has to know. I have to tell her.” She dried her face and pushed her shoulders back. She had to face this hard reality. “Do you promise?”