by Logan Byrne
I turned off the water and dried myself off before brushing my teeth and getting dressed. As I went into my room, the lamp on my nightstand was the only source of light, albeit dim. I wrapped my comforter around my body before turning off the light and putting my head back on the pillow. It was time.
I almost felt like I never actually fell asleep as my surroundings turned from the black abyss of my eyelids to the field I normally found her in. I still wasn’t sure why I kept coming back here, since I’d never seen it before in real life, but I didn’t complain about landing here. It was beautiful, after all.
“Belle,” I said.
“You don’t have to call me, you know. I already know when you come here. Call it former girlfriend’s intuition,” she said from behind me.
“Former girlfriend?” I asked.
“Well, yeah, I’m not your current one, am I?” she asked.
“Why wouldn’t you be?” I asked, as if the answer was so clear.
“Because I’m dead, Theo,” she said.
“No, you’re not. Well, you are, in real life, but not here,” I said.
“I’m not sure. Maybe we shouldn’t put a label on it right now and just enjoy being together,” she said.
“Okay, that sounds fair,” I said.
It really didn’t sound all that fair to me, but I didn’t want to argue with her—especially in here. Our time in here was so short compared with the time we’d had together in the real world, and I wasn’t going to spend it fighting with her. After all, I’d have to wait until tomorrow night to get the chance to see her again, and that short time every night while I slept was far too precious to spend getting into a spat over something that probably wasn’t all that important to begin with.
“So, where do you want to go tonight?” she asked, smiling.
“I actually have a favor to ask,” I said, scratching the back of my head.
“Uh-oh,” she said.
“No, it’s not bad, it’s just a strange request. I told Martin about you, and about us, but he’s skeptical. He said if you visited him in his dream, interacted with him, and then I told him what happened and what we said tomorrow, he’d believe me,” I said.
“And you want him to believe you?” she asked.
“Of course, wouldn’t you?” I asked.
“I’m not sure I can answer that question. I’m not in your position,” she said.
“Well, why wouldn’t you? I do because I want somebody to share this with. I don’t want to keep this a secret,” I said.
“And I wouldn’t want it to get out and have people think I’m crazy or have the government run tests on me in some secret underground bunker,” she said.
“Okay, I think you should lay off on the action movies,” I joked.
“I’ll do it, but only if you’ll come with. If you really want to go, we can, but I have to warn you about something. We aren’t totally in control there,” she said.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“We’d be going into his dream, meaning that he’s in control. We can leave at any time, but I can’t change or control what happens in there. It is what it is, and it may not be pretty,” she said.
“I need to take that risk. It’s the only way,” I said.
“Okay, then, here we go,” she said as she grabbed my hand.
We were transported through what could almost be described as a dream wormhole as we materialized in a place I’d never seen before.
“Wow,” I said, looking around.
To say his dream was much different than mine would be an understatement. I looked around and saw what was almost a candy world, filled with peppermint roads, gumdrop trees, and licorice street lamps. There were people around, but they looked like something out of The Wizard of Oz.
“This is … odd,” Belle said.
“We need to find him,” I said, still holding her hand.
“Where can we find the creator?” Belle asked one of the passing men.
“Why, he’s in the chocolate tower, of course,” he said, pointing off in the distance.
We looked at each other, likely both wondering how we missed it. A skyscraper made of milk chocolate stood in the distance, looking over the town. I really couldn’t wait until school tomorrow so I could ask Martin why he dreamed about this stuff. I might not know him as well as I thought.
“Hold on,” Belle said as we started to fly.
We made great time as we whizzed through the air and avoided cotton-candy clouds that floated dangerously close to the ground.
Belle, seemingly knowing where he’d be, shot up the side of the building to the top floor.
“There he is,” I said, looking at Martin.
He was sitting on a candy throne as he filled his face with melted chocolate. We walked toward him, catching his attention, before he perked up and waved at us.
“Theo! Belle! What are you doing here?” he asked.
“He doesn’t remember?” I asked Belle.
“Most likely he won’t know about everything from the outside world right now. He’ll remember this in the morning, though,” she said.
“We’re here to see you,” I said.
“Pull up a chair and have some food,” he said.
“I don’t even think I’m going to have to say what we said to him tomorrow. I think all this is going to be good enough,” I whispered to Belle.
She giggled a little as chocolate bunnies brought us a platter of treats to dig into. I couldn’t help but feel very much amused as I looked around and realized the scope of his dreams. He must’ve been dreaming about this a lot, and building a world for himself, because this was as extensive as it got. There was no way this was the first time he dreamed about all this. I was surprised he wanted me to visit his dreams. Maybe he hoped he’d have a different one so that I wouldn’t see his handiwork.
Time didn’t seem to last nearly long enough before everything started to disappear again. I felt an overwhelming sense of defeat throughout my body when she said it was about time to go, and I only wished I could stay in here with her forever.
“Kiss me,” I said before I could be ripped away.
She moved in, the same way she used to, and wrapped her arms around my neck as her lips, which were still as soft as ever, pressed against mine and made my stomach do flip-flops.
With my lips still puckered, I opened my eyes and saw my room as the darkness fled and sunlight began to break through the little slits in my blinds. I relaxed my mouth, wiped my eyes, and felt a sense of sadness as my only vision of Belle now was just in my imagination. Now all I needed to do was talk to Martin. If that really was his dream, then this was all real. She was real. She was still with me.
I needed that more than anything right now.
Chapter Fifteen
I tore off the bus when we pulled up to school and pushed my way through the slow-walking throngs of students to find Martin. He said he’d meet me outside my locker, and even though I thought we should talk somewhere more private, we didn’t have time. There was only so long before we had to get to class, and I’d have to wait until lunch to really talk to him about this again without anyone hearing.
As I sped down the hallway, I saw Martin standing beside my locker.
“So?” he asked when I reached him.
“Okay, so, I have something, and I’m really hoping it’s true,” I said.
“Tell me,” he said.
“I thought we were going to write them down,” I said.
“Yeah, about that, I’m not sure we’re going to do that,” he said.
“What? Why not?” I asked.
“Because what if they don’t match up? I don’t want you knowing what I dreamed about. No offense or anything,” he said.
I must’ve been in his dream. Why else would he be so secretive and sly about it? Of course he didn’t want me to know about his candy kingdom.
“Okay, but you have to be honest with me. If I get it right, you have to admit it,” I s
aid.
“Deal,” he replied.
“I mean it, Martin. You don’t know how big of an impact this will have on me. I need you to be truthful,” I said with a serious look and tone.
“Dude, okay, I promise,” he said.
“You were like a king in a world where everything was made of candy. You were in this massive chocolate skyscraper, and you were on a throne. Belle and I came and ate candy that was served by chocolate bunnies,” I said.
The look on his face was priceless. His jaw dropped open, and I could see his sheer and utter embarrassment. I didn’t know if he even realized what this meant for me, but for him, it must’ve been terrifying, and not because of Belle.
“Dude,” he said.
“I told you she was real,” I said.
“Okay, so say that she is—”
“She is. What more do you need?” I asked, interrupting him.
“Do you know what this means? This means that other people must be able to do this as well. Maybe whenever you see someone you know in your dream, someone that passed, it’s really them. What if people never leave us?” he asked, smiling.
“I’m not getting into all that right now,” I said as I closed my locker. “All I know is that she’s real, at least in some way, and I can still have her in my life.”
“Where are you going?” he asked in shock as I started to walk away.
“This might be true, but we still have class to get to,” I said with my arms out as I walked backward.
He shook his head at me before I turned around and started to rush to class. I whipped around a corner, admittedly too fast for my own good, before I hit what felt like a brick wall. The only problem was that this wall was fleshy, muscular, and had the head of a certain person on top of it.
I looked up and saw Trent looking down at me, his books clasped in his hands. He was alone and not with his crew.
“Excuse me,” I said.
“How are you doing?” he asked, stunning me.
“I’m sorry?” I asked in confusion.
“You know, with Belle and all. How are you taking it?” he asked.
Was this really happening? Was Trent being, dare I say it, nice to me? I must be in another dream. Nope, I definitely wasn’t, because Belle wasn’t here and why would I dream about being in school? I wouldn’t, and that was the dead giveaway.
“I’m doing as well as I can,” I said, not alluding to the discovery I’d just made, even though I wanted to tell everybody.
“That’s good. I’m really sorry, by the way,” he said.
“Aren’t you sad?” I asked.
Trent hadn’t bothered us after Paul went off on him that day in the diner. He started dating someone else, and to our surprise he actually did leave us alone. I wasn’t sure if that was because of Paul, because he didn’t care much for Belle anymore, or a mixture of the two.
“Yeah, I was upset when I heard about it. Not like you, obviously, but it was still hard,” he said.
“What do you mean not like me?” I asked.
“Well, you two had everything together. I know I was really bad when she dumped me, but after I took a step back and saw things, and really saw the two of you together, I realized that she and I would never have that. You two were really like the ‘it’ couple, if you believe in those types of things,” he said.
“Thank you, Trent. That means a lot to me. If you don’t mind me asking, why are you being nice all of the sudden?” I asked.
“Belle’s death really hit home for me. It made me realize that anybody can be gone in an instant, and I don’t want to live my life putting people down and making them feel bad about themselves. I have to get to class, though. Don’t be afraid to say hi sometime. You’re a cool kid,” he said before walking off.
I looked back and watched him before he turned a corner and was out of sight. I shook my head, mostly in disbelief, before walking to my class and getting inside just in the knick of time. Some people really do end up surprising you.
I sat through the school day with so many ideas running through my head. Now that I had actual proof of Belle and her somewhat existence, all I wanted to know was how. Could everyone who was dead do this, or was she special? Was she a ghost, or something else? I knew I wasn’t the only one she visited, since she told me that herself, but did they actually see her and know about her, or was I the only one? I had to remember all these questions so that I could ask her later tonight.
During lunch, I pulled out my phone and searched for answers online about dreams and what they meant, as well as how to decipher them. There was an entire site dedicated to communicating with loved ones through your dreams. A site that I’d normally dismiss for being crazy was now fascinating and intriguing. Were the crazy people with the crazy ideas really the rational ones? There was so much to learn!
Martin insisted on giving me a ride home from school. I thought he mostly wanted to talk to me more about it at my house while my mom was at work. We popped some pizza bagels in the oven and sat at the kitchen table as we tried to make sense of it.
“So what do you guys do?” he asked.
“Anything, really. We haven’t had much interaction, but we went to Paris, saw you, hung around in a field, and yeah, that’s about it, I think,” I said.
“Can you do anything?” he asked.
“Yeah, pretty much. Whatever your imagination can dream up,” I said.
“This is so amazing,” he said, smiling from ear to ear.
“I’m still in shock about it. To think that she’s still there. Man, it’s amazing,” I said.
“Have you guys, you know, kissed or anything? Is that even possible?” he asked.
“Yeah, we have. It’s the same as it used to be in real life. I get the same feelings, if not even more amplified,” I said.
“So what does that mean about your status?” he asked.
“Status?” I asked.
“Yeah, you know, dating or whatever. How does that work, if it even does at all?”
“We’re not dating or anything like that, at least not yet. She wants to just enjoy being together, which I’m fine with. Besides, I think she thinks it would be weird to date, considering the situation,” I said.
“Yeah, that’s what I was worried about,” he said.
“Why worried?” I asked.
“Because you don’t want to date and, you know, commit yourself to somebody who isn’t really real. There’s a lot to see out there, and there are a lot of other girls out there,” he said.
“Yeah, but none of them compare to her,” I said.
“And that might be true, but you also shouldn’t compare somebody else to her, because if you do that, you’ll never be happy. You have to see and judge somebody based on who they are and how they are with you. You can’t be on your own deathbed one day regretting that you never had love or physical affection in your life,” he said.
“I do get that, though. With her,” I said.
“I don’t want to bring you down or fight or anything. I’m just saying that you shouldn’t pass up a potential opportunity just because of Belle being in your dreams. You should at least give somebody a chance and get to know them. I’m not saying right now, because you’re in no good capacity to do that, but someday,” he said.
His words were a lot to think about. I wasn’t mad at him, and I didn’t think he overstepped any boundaries. I knew he always had my back. I understood where he was coming from, but I did get all of those things from Belle. I could feel her hugging me, and I could feel us kissing, and I could feel the love that I felt out here while I was in there. It was all there, and nobody else in the real world would ever give me the same types of feelings that I got when I was with her. We could see the world, go on crazy adventures, and do anything and everything we’d ever dreamed of. And the best part was that I’d have unlimited time with her when my time finally came and I passed away. I knew that was a morbid thought, and I definitely didn’t want to die anytime soon, but at
least she’d be there—I hoped.
The pizza bagels were soon done, and I pulled the heaps of oozing cheese out of the oven. We each took five, since the bagels weren’t super large, before sitting back down at the table and taking out our books.
“Math has been so hard lately,” I said as I ran my fingers through my hair.
“I think it’s just because you missed that week. I can help you,” he said.
“What’s this all about?” I asked, pointing to something in the homework.
Martin helped me learn more of what I’d missed, which I didn’t think my teacher adequately did, as we ate our pizza bagels. My mom got home two hours later.
She and Martin talked a little bit, mostly about his mom, while I scratched my head and finished the final few problems I had on my homework. I wrote my name at the top and folded it before putting it in my book.
“Done,” I said exuberantly.
“All done with your homework?” my mom asked, smiling.
“Math, at least,” I said.
“What else do you have?” Martin asked.
“Just business stuff, but it’s not too hard. It’ll probably take fifteen minutes,” I said.
“Then get it out of the way now so that you can relax the rest of the night,” my mom said.
“Yeah, Theo, you don’t want to get to bed late,” Martin said, with a knowing look.
I immediately opened my book and started working on my assignment as I pictured Belle. I didn’t want to miss out on time with her. This entire situation would motivate me to not mess around all night or stay up late. I’d be going for as much sleep time as I could possibly get. I could just chock it up to being a teen, I suppose.
The hands on the clock started to turn, and the light outside dimmed. Martin decided to call it a night. My mom got him a few random things to take to his mother, and I walked him out to his car. There were a few small rogue snowflakes falling from the sky, and the windows of his car were covered with frost.