It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Chick Lit

by S. E. Babin

“Sure, why not?”

  Why not indeed? “Do you bring all your dates here?”

  “You’re the first.”

  I didn’t know whether to be flattered or terrified. “Well, um, thanks.”

  “Something about you made me want to share it with you.”

  “Would that be my charming up-beat personality?” I teased. Knowing I was more like a Grinch than a Christmas fairy.

  “No, that probably wasn’t it. I just find this place is good for my soul, and I thought it might be good for yours, too.”

  “Is that part of the hippy crap?”

  “You don’t have to be a hippy to appreciate nature and its power to make you feel better.”

  That was true. In fact, there were plenty of medical studies that focused on that very thing. “Thanks for bringing me here.”

  I was trying to keep my distance because as much as the thought of touching his hot male body appealed to me, and as much as I wanted to be kissed again, I had a feeling that once I took the next step towards Connor, stepping away was going to be hard.

  The truth was I was lonely in Sydney, sick and tired of taking on the world all alone. Coming here had shown me that. Having this very nice man treat me very nicely had shown me that it was way too long since I’d been with anyone decent. That made me sad. And it made me pathetic.

  Connor held his hand out. “Come on. Let’s swim out where it’s quieter.”

  Hand holding and naked swimming I could do. We swam across the pond to the shallows, not too shallow thank heavens, and then he dropped my hand. I kind of missed the warmth.

  “What made you walk away from corporate life?”

  “You mean, what was the inciting incident?”

  “Yeah. I suppose.”

  His smile faded. “My mother had a fall. She was on the floor of her apartment for 3 days before anyone found her. I was off in New York drinking champagne and hitting on inappropriate women and my mother was in pain alone. It was kind of a reality check.”

  I didn’t know what to say to that. Of course it was.

  “Is she okay now?”

  “Not really. She’s in a home, not far from here. She needs twenty-four-hour care. She probably needed it for a while, but I didn’t pay close enough attention. I didn’t see what I should have seen.”

  “She probably did a good job of covering up. That’s not uncommon.”

  “Sure, but a lot of that is on me. I mean I had the resources to take better care of her and I just was too self-centred to know she needed them. And if she didn’t want to take up my time, that doesn’t reflect too well on me either, does it?” He shrugged.

  “So you changed your whole life?”

  “People are more important than money and accolades. I didn’t quit my job because I wasn’t good at it. I changed my life so I wasn’t a horse’s ass anymore.”

  I smiled. “Are you totally sure about that? I’m sure you still have your moments.”

  He splashed me then. “Unlike yourself.”

  “Oh no, I’m a horse’s ass, as you put it, most of the time, as well you know.”

  “So what are you going to do about that?” he asked.

  “Right now? Nothing.” And then I gave him a huge splash back and we laughed until our naked sides ached.

  * * *

  We didn’t make out on the picnic, which was a shame. Two naked adults and no making out. Maybe he wasn’t attracted to me when he saw the full package. Or maybe he didn’t want to make out with an unreformed ass such as myself.

  I tried not to care about that. I’d spent a wonderful afternoon with a really great guy. He’d taken me somewhere special to him. That was a whole lot of something, and to be fair I’d only known him two days.

  He pulled up in front of my grandmother’s house at 4.30, which gave me plenty of time to get around to Anne’s on time.

  “Thanks for a really great afternoon.”

  “My pleasure. Nothing like a naked swim with a beautiful woman to make my day just about perfect.”

  “Just about? What would make it perfect?” I felt my brow crease in concern.

  “This.” And then he leaned in and claimed my mouth with his. Okay so maybe he did like me after all.

  It had been a long-time since I’d made out in a truck in the cold light of day outside my grandmothers’ house. About sixteen years to be exact. Of course, that time I’d been with Zach, my first and only true love. That was one hot summer.

  I wasn’t that girl anymore. In fact, I’d promised myself I’d never be that girl again. I was never going to let my heart be broken again and certainly not by a guy whose only plan was to surf his way through the next decade or more. And the truth was I hadn’t been that girl. I’d kept to my word and been serious and studious and hard-working. And I’d worked just as hard at keeping my heart protected.

  Until now. Maybe Connor wasn’t my destiny but he made me feel things, want things, imagine things I couldn’t have. I lived in the city hundreds of miles away and he lived here. My life wasn’t conducive to a long-distance relationship, even if Connor wanted one.

  I pulled back from the kiss. “I’d better go. I can feel Elspeth and her coven peering through the curtains.”

  “You think they enjoyed the show?”

  I laughed, hopping out of the car. “Oh, I know they did.”

  Connor came around and handed me my bag. “See you at church, Miranda.”

  “Yep, I’ll be the vision in purple. You won’t miss me.”

  “No, but I’ll miss you until then.”

  Oh, he was smooth. Way too smooth for me.

  * * *

  Anne and her friend Lacey were mainlining the sweet wine like it was water.

  “You might want to slow down, ladies. You don’t want a hangover for the wedding.”

  “Thanks Doc, we’ll take that under advisement,” Lacey said, topping up their glasses. I was having a beer instead and taking it very slowly. I was saving my energy to drink through the reception.

  “So, you and Connor?” Anne teased. I was painting her toenails a shade of lilac. Not that anyone would see them in her shoes, but if the bride wanted lilac toes then that’s what she was having. Of course, if the bride would stop wriggling that would help.

  “We went for a swim out at his property. Perfect on a hot day.”

  “He’s perfect,” swooned Lacey. Lacey was married with three kids and a little sloshed.

  “He’s dreamy,” said Anne. “Is he a good kisser? Dave’s a good kisser. You can tell a lot about someone by how they kiss.”

  “Yeah, like how much practice they’ve had.” I muttered. Then I remembered I wasn’t allowed to be cynical today. “So tell me about your first kiss with Dave.”

  I knew this story and I knew that it would take half an hour. Time enough to paint everyone’s toenails and lay out everyone’s dresses for tomorrow. I was happy for Anne and as I listened to her story about meeting Dave when he came to fix a burst pipe at her place, my hard heart melted a little more. Connor was right. Dave was one of the good guys and Anne was one of the great gals. They were a perfect match. Solid, sweet and caring. It would be a lovely wedding because of that, even if it was going to be like they were getting married in a time capsule.

  Lacey worked at the hospital as a receptionist and when Anne went to answer a phone call, she was at me.

  “Hey, did you know we need a new doctor at the Base Hospital? Old Doc Johnson is retiring.”

  “I didn’t.”

  “You could do that job, right?”

  “Technically, but I have a job, Lacey, and a life in Sydney.”

  She gave me a shrug. “Yeah well your family is all here Miranda. And no offense, but you seem happier than you did when you arrived a few days ago. Maybe coming back would be good for you.”

  Maybe. “It’s just because I’m on holiday. It wouldn’t be like that if I was working.”

  She shook her head. “I worked at a city hospital before I came to the Bay.
It’s stressful here sometimes but it sure is nothing like that. “

  “It would feel like a cop out.”

  “Did you become a doctor to help people, Miranda, or did you become a doctor to only help city people?”

  Well, I became a doctor because I was smart and got the marks and I wanted to prove to my family that I wasn’t like them, some flakey actor, not that I was telling Lacey that, but yes, also to help people.

  “Anyway, think about it,” she said. “And don’t think I didn’t notice you avoided the question about kissing Connor either. You can’t do that in Sydney.”

  No, you could not, you also couldn’t naked skinny dip. But I did have a life in Sydney and I was not going to alter my whole world for some guy I barely knew. Was I? Except the idea of moving here, living in a beach house and working at the hospital wasn’t horrible. The idea of having some time off and swimming in the morning and attending Elspeth’s wacky yoga classes was actually appealing.

  Man, I must be burnt out.

  * * *

  The morning of the wedding was a frenzy of hair, makeup, baby’s breath and tulle. Thank goodness no one smoked because with all the hairspray and synthetic in the room, one spark and we’d all have gone up in flames.

  Anne was glowing. Yep that was the word, not from the heat like the rest of us but from the sheer joy of the occasion, and that joy was infectious. So by the time we made it to the church, on time of course, I was ready to walk down the aisle with co-ordination, purpose and a genuine smile on my face. What I was not ready for was the sight of Connor all neat and clean and shaven in a tuxedo at the other end of the aisle.

  Holy guacamole, that man was hot. I felt my steps falter. And then he flashed me a smile and dear god I actually gasped because breathtaking wasn’t a big enough word. Not even close. But then I just put one foot in front of the other and started walking because there was Dave and it wasn’t about me and my mega-crush. It was about Dave and Anne and their love, which was a palpable thing.

  I watched Anne walk down the aisle and she didn’t falter at all, nor did she rush. I had the very distinct impression she was savouring the moment. And yes, she did look like she’d stepped out if the late 20th century, but she made it work so much that I may have even shed a tear or two.

  The bride and groom kissed, the crowd cheered and I linked my arm through Connor’s to walk back out into the blistering December sunshine.

  “Purple is a good colour on you,” he whispered into my ear in a voice that was far sexier than the dress deserved.

  “Thanks. Although this is still the least comfortable dress I’ve ever worn. I can’t wait to take it off,” I said through my plastered-on smile.

  “Maybe I can help you with that later.”

  If I hadn’t been hot and bothered before, I certainly was now. Heat crept through my body, causing a pink flush to ride up my cheeks. Happy Christmas to me.

  * * *

  The reception was at the golf club, which like the rest of Chameleon Bay was waterside. We did the obligatory photos with the beach and the rolling greens behind us and tried to catch a breeze. I didn’t want to be a party-pooper, but as a medical professional, I was seriously concerned about the bridal party getting dehydrated out there. Still, I could tell light headedness and the threat of a fainting spell were worth it to the bride so I tried to drink my champagne slowly and not guzzle. I was here to serve, not pass out.

  The golf club itself looked like Christmas had exploded in its foyer. There was a gaudy tree with a thousand gifts under it, all donated by the local community for nearby charity drives. The Christmas music was telling me about mummy making out with Santa under a similar tree, and I wondered if I really would get to make out with Connor in the same location.

  “Do you have a Christmas tree?” I asked him.

  “Why? Is this song making you horny?”

  Yes. I swatted him. “No. Just curious.”

  “Yeah, for when my mum visits tomorrow. But if the song is motivating you, I’m happy to show you my tree, Miranda.”

  “Seriously?” I turned to him, eyebrows skyward. “That is the worst line ever.”

  He just laughed. He really had a great laugh. It was like a low rumble that started deep and worked itself all the way up to the sexy creases beside his eyes. And they were genuine smile lines, unlike my own frown lines. “I know. Sorry I’m about to expire in this suit. I’m off my game.”

  Dave, standing next to him, heard that last comment and joined in. “We should be in Hawaiian shirts, not monkey suits.”

  “Whatever the bride wants,” Connor said, raising his hand for a fist bump.

  Dave lifted his own hand in return. “You know it. Whatever the bride wants.”

  They were cute together. Real brothers who had each other’s back. It was sweet.

  The bride in question came over and informed us it was time to line up to enter the function room where they would be officially announced as mister and missus for the first time. Before I lined up, I fluffed her skirt for her, as bridesmaids do.

  “You look gorgeous,” I said, smiling up at her. And she did. That’s what love did, apparently.

  We queued to go in, my arm linked in Connor’s once again. He covered my hand with his, and I felt a weird sense of belonging and safety. It was probably the warm fuzzies the wedding was giving me, the fact that it was Christmas and all my family was here. It definitely couldn’t have been the man himself.

  * * *

  If Connor had a theme song for this wedding, it should have been hot potato. Yes, he was my date, but he was passed from woman to woman on the dance floor like one hot potato. I spent a good hour watching from the side of the floor while every woman in town had a dance with him. He was gracious and polite to the ladies in question as he looked at me with pleading eyes. When Dottie from the post office went in for an ass-grab, I intervened.

  “You took your sweet time,” he muttered into my hair as Madonna belted out a slow song.

  “Somehow you manage when I’m not in town.”

  “Yes, by not going anywhere with a dance floor.” I looked up at him and smiled. “I feel violated.”

  “Poor baby. I’m here now.”

  He tried to rest his head against the side of my face, but my hair was too stiff. “Your hair is like straw.”

  “Such a smooth talker,” I chuckled. “There’s about a can of hairspray there working its magic. Although I’m sure glue would have worked as well.”

  “You got your speech ready?” he asked.

  “I hate public speaking. I’m okay presenting a research paper, but the personal stuff it’s …”

  “Too personal?”

  “Yeah, smart ass, too personal.”

  “You’ll be fine.” He pulled me closer and I let my body melt in to his. When he said it, I almost believed it.

  Two hours later, I was shoes off, my feet up on a chair, enjoying a champagne. He was next to me surveying the other stragglers. We’d waved off the bride and groom a while earlier and now we could relax.

  “It wasn’t the worst wedding I’ve ever been to,” I conceded.

  “True. And yours wasn’t the worst speech I’ve ever heard.”

  “But it was probably bottom five.”

  He smiled. “Definitely. You somehow took the awkward pause and made it even more awkward, but the love was obvious.”

  “Thanks.” I toasted him with my glass.

  “How come your parents didn’t fly in?”

  My parents certainly could have flown in. They could afford it and it would have been the right thing to do. Anne was their only niece and they hadn’t seen Elspeth in maybe five years.

  “Honest answer?”

  “Always.”

  “They’re selfish. My Dad is a narcissist and I’m not sure what clinical diagnosis to give my mother. It doesn’t matter, really. If it doesn’t work for them, they don’t bother. They think they’re the centre of the universe.”

  “That m
ust be hard for you.”

  I shrugged. “I suppose it has been. It’s made me independent, resilient, determined to succeed on my own terms.”

  “You never wanted to act?”

  I gave a chuckle. I had a past and I usually kept it buried. “Actually I did act. I was on the soap opera Bayview for five years from age nine.”

  “Really?” So many people didn’t believe me when I told them that. He looked at me closely.

  “Yeah, I was little Penny Bannister.”

  “Oh my gosh, I remember that character and the drama when they killed her - or you – off.”

  If he thought that was a drama, he should have seen what went on behind the scenes. My parents went bat shit crazy when I said I’d leave the show, and when I managed to talk the writers into killing me off so I couldn’t ever return, they went ballistic.

  “Yeah, she was beloved by many that Penny. I hated it. I mean, I liked being on the set and truthfully, the cast and crew were like a second family to me, but the acting part was never my bag. I was too self- conscious and then as I hit the awkward teen years …”

  “Wow. Wait till I tell my mates I kissed little Penny Bannister.”

  “You know that sounds kind of sick, right?” I nudged him.

  “Yeah I do.”

  Elspeth was twirling around the dance floor. She had excellent form for a woman of her age.

  “She’s glad you’re here. She misses you a lot.”

  I let out a long sigh. “I know. I need to try harder to visit.”

  Lacey walked past on her way out, but called over her shoulder “Don’t forget about that job, honey.”

  “Job?”

  I shook my head, my straw-like hair scratching my face. “It’s nothing.”

  “I bet it’s something.”

  “Time to put my fairy grandmother in her carriage and take her home.”

  I wasn’t talking about the job with Connor. Connor made me want things: like Connor and small-town life, quiet talks with my grandmother and time to swim naked under waterfalls. Things I shouldn’t want and couldn’t have.

  * * *