With that sad epiphany and the rest of the day still weighing on her, Megan slumped back in the booth. Rubbing at her temples, she wished the ibuprofen would kick in quickly. “Oh Janey … this guy stuff isn’t easy, is it? How did we get ourselves into these situations?” She let go of a deep sigh.
“Situations? What situations?” Allie suddenly appeared with their tray of food and a bright smile.
“Allie! It’s so good to see you!” Megan knew she sounded over the top. But she couldn’t help it. Seeing Allie, her spirits lifted immediately, like the cavalry had suddenly arrived.
“Sit and we’ll tell you everything.” Janey scooted over to make room.
“Wish I could, but it’s one of those nights around here.” Without having to ask, Allie correctly set their plates down in front of them. “I’m filling in for the fill-ins.”
“How are the kids?” Megan asked, ignoring her salad for the moment. “Everyone good?”
“Great. They’re coming with me to help with the Volunteer Day out at Mac’s farm.” She paused, scanning the table. “You all need anything else? Extra honey mustard or anything?” Allie glanced between the two of them.
Megan shook her head along with Janey. “We’re fine.” She unrolled her napkin in her lap. “I’m so glad you’re bringing the kids out.”
“Yeah.” Allie nodded. “I think it’ll be good for them, although they probably won’t last very long.”
“That’s okay. It’ll just be fun to have you guys there for however long.”
“So … how’s everything going with Mac?” Allie plopped her hands on her hips, looking bent on cutting to the chase. “He’s not one of your ‘situations,’ is he?”
Megan should’ve known her intuitive and inquisitive friend wouldn’t let her earlier question go unanswered. Glancing from Allie to Janey and back to Allie again, she finally found her voice and ‘fessed up. “It’s—it’s a long story. I just think maybe— I don’t know, I’m thinking I should take a step back.”
“Back?” Janey jumped in. “Like back to under a rock?” She looked at Megan like she’d gone crazy.
“Excuse me, Red? You should talk.”
Allie leaned over the table, spreading her hands referee-style between them. “You two are beginning to sound like sisters. I don’t know what you all are talking about, and I wish I had time for the details. But the thing that I’ve found works best with Greg is honesty. Pure and simple honesty.” She paused thoughtfully. “And well, peanut butter cookies. Those work great. Oh—and foot rubs. He really likes—”
Allie must’ve realized that she and Janey were staring at her because she stopped there. “Well, maybe you just want to start with honesty.”
Straightforward and sensible. No wonder she and Allie had always been the best of friends. “Sure you can’t sit? For just a minute?” Megan asked again, hoping more chatting with Allie would help clear her head. But Greg was waving to his wife from the kitchen, and after a round of hugs, Allie went back to work. Meanwhile, she and Janey let the subjects of Sean and Mac rest while they ate dinner, which was probably better for their digestive systems anyway.
Once they finished and the table was cleared, Janey got out her publicity folder and started going through the papers inside.
“This is the press release Mary Duncan wrote up. I’ll be sending it to the Enquirer and the Loveland Herald. It’s an update, giving more details about the activities now that we have that information. Oh, and this”—she pulled a mint green paper from her stack—”is another flyer advertising the event. It’ll probably be the last one to go out.”
“I love the All-Stars Sports logo you came up with, Janey. It looks great in print and I can’t wait to see it on the T-shirts.”
“Thanks. It did turn out good, didn’t it?” Her friend preened. “Mary and Beth Hermann have offered to take the flyers to Maineville, Montgomery, and Milford and put them up on bulletin boards in Starbucks and places like that.”
“That’ll be great.”
“Oh, and thanks for sending this to me also.” Janey slid a photo from the folder. “Do you have the disc for it? I’m not sure just yet where or how we might use it. But I’m glad you had someone take it. It’s a darling picture of you and Mac and Sammy.”
“Me and Mac and Sammy? From Amazing Race day? Or what?” She couldn’t imagine what Janey was talking about. “Can I see?”
Janey handed her the photo and Megan’s heart stopped still in her chest. “I—I didn’t send this to you.”
“You didn’t? It came without a name. That’s why I assumed it was from you. Honestly, I was wondering why you didn’t just drop it off to me at the bakery.”
“Oh, this is … this is creepy.” A new pain shot between her eyes.
“You didn’t know anything about it?”
“No, not at all. Well, I mean that day Sammy and I went out to Mac’s farm for the first time, there was a man there with a camera. He ran off as soon as we noticed him. Mac went chasing after him, but never caught up. And … well, I guess I didn’t realize he’d taken pictures of us.” She sighed. “Or at least I’d hoped he hadn’t.”
She stared at the photo in her hand. It would’ve been a great picture of the three of them on the blanket enjoying each other and the sunshine, if it hadn’t been taken by some person lurking in the shrubs. It would’ve been a nice way to remember the day, if it hadn’t been taken by someone who’d been stalking them. “I don’t understand why someone would do this. It’s not like they’re making money from it.”
“Yeah, not true paparazzi, I suppose.” Janey reached for the photo and folded it in half and in half again as if she clearly meant to discard it later. “I’m sorry I upset you.” She shoved the bent-up photo back in the folder.
“You didn’t do anything. I just don’t understand … who?”
“I don’t know. You and Sammy were in Sweet Sensations before you went out to Mac’s that day. Someone could’ve overheard us talking about it.” Janey bit her lip. “Maybe?”
“But why?”
Janey shrugged. “Probably because Mac’s a celebrity. I mean, it’s just like that Trista lady this morning during the radio interview. Who knows why she went after him?”
“You heard that, too?”
“Yeah.” Janey sounded solemn for a change. “That’s why you said what you did earlier? About backing off? Is it true you think he’ll get traded from the Hawks?”
“I don’t know what to think. Or what I think.” She looked into her friend’s sympathetic eyes. “But I know I need to stop wondering and go ask Mac.”
And that was the honest truth.
Chapter 17
Mac had barely gotten home from his bowling practice with Sammy, locked up his truck, unlocked the front door of the house, and flicked on the outdoor lights when he heard a set of tires hit the gravel driveway.
Seeing Megan’s white SUV wind its way up the drive by the light of the half moon, he hustled out onto the wraparound porch, quickly grabbed the whittling knife he kept in an antique milk case by the front door and a birch limb he’d been working on resting up against the case. Plopping himself down into one of the weatherworn wicker chairs, he leaned back and propped his feet up on the wide wooden railing that ran the length of the porch.
As if on cue, Bitty came meowing out of the evening darkness and curled up by his feet, making it look like the pair of them had been sitting there together for hours that way. Which happened to be a good thing, since he’d implied to Megan that he’d be hanging out at the farm all night while she was out to dinner with Janey.
Knife and tree limb in hands, he pretended to be engrossed in his whittling. But, of course, his mind was a hundred miles from that, happily focused on Megan instead.
He was surprised that she was dropping by instead of heading over to her parents’ to pick up Sammy, but glad, too. His time practicing bowling with Sammy had been really special, and now the chance to spend a few hours with Megan would be even
more so. Altogether, both activities made him feel privileged, like he’d won the lottery or something. And the other good thing—he wouldn’t have to wait any longer to tell her the big news about his elbow.
But after he heard her cut the engine, noticed the headlights go off after a bit, and then watched her amble slowly up the sidewalk with her head bent down, he sensed something wasn’t right.
Immediately his legs dropped from the rail with a thud. He laid the whittling paraphernalia aside and got up from the chair, wanting to go toward her. But the way she wouldn’t even look up at him paralyzed him. He froze in step as Megan paused on the second porch step and wouldn’t come any closer. Felt his stomach instinctively twist when she didn’t bother to reach out and pet Bitty like she usually did.
“Did I interrupt anything?” Megan finally looked his way, but managed to avoid his eyes.
“Are you kidding? I’m glad you stopped over. Want to sit?” He pointed over his shoulder at the pair of once-white chairs.
“No. I have to go pick up Sammy. Just thought I’d drop by on my way.”
He knew her parents’ house was in the complete opposite direction, but didn’t mention it.
“How was dinner?” he asked instead.
“Good.”
“Paxton’s is always good.”
“True. It always is.”
And there it was—an awkward silence. They rarely had those anymore, not since they’d first met. But they sure were having one now. Mac felt pressed to fill the void.
“Sure you don’t want to sit down?” Maybe if he could just keep her near him, close in his camp, he could unravel whatever was suddenly tangling up things between them.
“No.” She fidgeted with the keys in her hand, barely looking at him. “I just— Well, I needed to talk to you is all.”
“Okay. No problem.”
But it wasn’t okay, and the way she was acting was a problem. He tried to soften his expression, making it easier for her to speak. But his jaw clenched instinctively, as if preparing to get struck by who knew what. “I’m all ears.”
“Well, I—I was thinking …” She rubbed at her forehead as if it was paining her to do so. “Tomorrow all the volunteers will be out here, and well, next week is the big event and—”
“Oh yeah—and don’t forget Thursday they’ll be announcing the event at the Hawks’ home game. We’re still on for that, right? I wanted you to meet some of the guys. They’re characters. But underneath it all, they’re okay guys.” He forced a chuckle, despite the unease he felt between them. “You’ll like them.”
“Yeah … that’s one of the things I wanted to talk about.” Megan paused, bit her lip. “I—I don’t think I can go with you.”
“Yeah? You have to work? Need a sitter?” She really hadn’t planned ahead for the game? That stung a bit.
“No, I …” She shifted on her feet, causing the shadows around her face to shift as well. The light caught her features, and he had a clearer sight of the gripping consternation there. How had that happened when the last time he saw her she only had smiles for him—and what he thought was love shining in her eyes?
“That’s—that’s what I was going to talk to you about, Mac. I mean in a week this’ll all be over, you know? Sports Day will be over. And well, when it is, we won’t exactly be tied together anymore.”
Not tied together anymore?
“What?”
“Well, if it wasn’t for the All-Stars Sports Day event we would’ve never met. Even you said that at one point.”
“Yeah, but I just meant—”
She talked over him, noticeably intent on cutting him off. “And you’re right, we wouldn’t have met. So now that the sports day is almost over—well, next week—there’s no reason you—we—need to keep seeing one another.”
“No reason?” In a millisecond, his chin hardened. Anger surged up into his head, making it feel as if his brain could explode instantaneously. Despite that, he worked to control his voice. “You really think there’s no reason?”
“I’m just trying to be honest with you, Mac. I mean, it just makes sense that we’d back off. You know, now that we’re not going to have anything to connect us together anymore.”
What was she talking about? Where was all of this coming from?
Nothing to connect them? That was like a bullet to the heart.
He clenched his teeth. Okay. Well. If she couldn’t see all the things they had in common to connect them, he sure wasn’t going to stand there and enumerate them all.
And if she truly didn’t feel connected to him in all the ways he felt attached to her, what was he going to do? Beg her to feel differently?
He couldn’t believe the humiliation, the hurt. He’d never had to beg a woman for anything before. His pulse pounded in his temples as he tried to contain his temper. His fists clenched at his side.
“I don’t know why you’re suddenly acting this way,” he ground out. “Aren’t you even going to tell me why you changed your mind?”
He lifted his jaw, prepared to take whatever comments she dished out. His insides in turmoil, he tried to make eye contact, ready to see the truth for himself in her eyes.
But she turned her face away, looking out past the glow of the porch light, into the dark night instead. When she didn’t answer him at first, a trickle of hope seeped in. Tempting him to reach out to her. But it was obvious she’d made a decision not to stand within his reach. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans instead.
“Megan? Aren’t you going to answer me?” So frustrated, his words came out in a bark. “Is this really what you want?”
She turned at the sound of his voice, and he thought he saw tears coming from her eyes. But she backed down the steps into the blackness before he could be sure of what he was seeing. There was no denying what he heard though.
“Yes, it’s—it’s okay with me,” her voice hitched on the words.
He stood stunned as she fled down the sidewalk to her car.
Megan could barely see through her tears well enough to make the turn-around by Mac’s barn and to head out of his driveway onto Route 48. Luckily the dark, winding part of the country road had become more familiar to her over the past several months. She’d driven it often lately, easily sailing over the once-foreign curves on her way to the farm. And every time she did, the drive and just thinking of where she was headed gave her that warm, excited feeling of coming home.
Just like Mac had.
Oh, what have I done? She sobbed into the darkness.
“What have I done?” The words echoed back at her. So did her remorse. The talk with Mac hadn’t gone anything like she’d wanted it to. It hadn’t gone at all the way she’d planned it would.
On her drive over to see him, she’d decided she’d do exactly what Allie had suggested. That she’d be honest and open and tell him everything that was on her mind. How she really wasn’t sure she could handle being involved with a professional baseball player. How she liked control and didn’t do topsy-turvy all that well and didn’t know if she could take being in a relationship with someone who would always be traveling. Or who could get traded to a city across the country.
And the whole celebrity thing. She’d really wanted to talk with him about that. Sure, there were countless women out there who might find Mac’s star factor attractive and alluring. But it didn’t hold much appeal for her. In fact, it frightened her more than anything.
Especially where Sammy was concerned. And especially after Janey showed her that photo of the three of them. To think that being in a relationship with Mac could put her and Sammy in the limelight—make them targets for gossip and subjects for sneaky thrill-seekers who wanted to get a picture of them all—scared her. Point blank.
She was going to say all of that. Get it all off her chest. And from there, she’d imagined they could sit and talk, sort things out. Truly, in her heart of hearts, she thought just seeing Mac would ease much of the fear she’d been feeling
about the two of them being together.
But then she’d pulled into his driveway.
And right before she turned off her headlights, she looked across the field and saw it—the practice diamond where Mac and his uncle had spent so much time together.
Baseball. It truly was Mac’s first love. He’d told her that. And the thing was, he didn’t even have to tell her. She could see it in his eyes. In his whole being. He came to life just talking about it.
She’d felt so much closer to him the day he’d shared that with her—all about his love of baseball.
Funny though, how now the realization of how important the sport was to him made her feel so distant from him.
Baseball was what Mac was meant to do. He was great at it. It was his calling. Others might still be wondering if he’d ever play again. But from all she’d seen and all she knew about elbows, she didn’t know any reason why he wouldn’t be out on the mound next season.
Which was nothing short of a miracle.
But then miracles do happen when they’re supposed to.
“And Mac is supposed to play ball,” she whispered to herself.
The reality of it felt like a stab to her gut, making her crumple in the car seat. It hurt so much, realizing she shouldn’t get in the way of that with all her reservations. Her hang-ups. And fears.
She loved him. Yes, she loved him too much for that to happen.
And, no, he shouldn’t have to give up his first love. Shouldn’t have to compromise or choose. And by backing out on their relationship the way she had, she’d made it easy for him. He wouldn’t have to make choices or concessions.
Of course, he hadn’t looked happy about it. But once he started playing ball again, he’d be fine. Everything would be okay again. For him.
A block from her parents’ house, she paused her car at a stop sign, sitting there awhile wishing in some small way that knowing that gave her some sort of solace. At the moment though, her heart ached intensely. And it seemed impossible and improbable that it would ever stop.
Finally pulling into her folks’ driveway, she grabbed a tissue from her purse and blotted at her eyes. Took a few final sniffles, tried to pinch some pink into her cheeks, and put on a fresh dab of lipstick.
Wedding Homerun in Loveland, Ohio Page 18