by Blair Young
“I will,” I said. I ducked past her and headed to my room, eager to get out of the situation as soon as possible. I didn’t tell her that I thought Dean was a liar, and I didn’t tell her that I thought she wasn’t being entirely truthful with me, either. Maybe she did know my parents, maybe that was a true statement, but, I knew for a fact she couldn’t be as good of friends with them as she claimed to be.
There was no way. I would have heard about her in some way before they died.
And Dean, well, I wasn’t sure if he was lying to just me, to me and Damon, or to all three of us, but I knew there was something off about him, and she might not be able to see it because of how in love with him she was. She had warned me about falling for Damon, telling me that I might lose my wits if I were to start obsessing over him.
But, Susan didn’t seem to have the self-awareness to know that she herself was clearly losing her own common sense when it came to Dean.
If only you could tell her the truth about Dean. How you really feel about him and how you caught him going through her things in the office. Maybe you should. It might not end well, and it might make Dean mad at you if he finds out that you told Susan, but on the other hand, if it is something she needs to hear, then maybe you would be doing the right thing by telling her the truth.
She clearly can’t see Dean the way you do, and even Damon is somehow brainwashed by the way he is. They both just act like he’s the greatest thing to ever happen to this house, but I think he’s up to something. He’s got to be. There’s no way he just cares so much about us all that he wants to be the dad in this family.
There’s something dark about him, you can see it in the way that he looks at you. There’s something fake about that smile, and something about the way he talks to you that just screams he’s a fake. You’ve dealt with enough fake people in your life, maybe you should trust your instincts on this.
It’s bad enough you have to deal with whoever this psycho is who is writing those notes and breaking into your locker and even your own bedroom! Do you really want to have to deal with your foster mom’s boyfriend on top of it. Maybe talking to her would be the right thing to do, even if it will be a difficult conversation for you to have.
Why does this have to be so hard? Why can’t you be like every other teen girl and just be living life and having fun? Isn’t life supposed to get hard when you become an adult? But childhood has been harder than what adulthood seems to be over and over!
I shook my head, wishing that I could get rid of some of the frustration that had built up inside me. The bottom line was that I didn’t trust Dean, and I wanted him out of the house. I wanted him out of my life, in fact, and I would do just about anything to see him go.
It would hurt Damon, I knew that. He had been really torn up when Dean and Susan broke up, to the point his and Susan’s relationship had changed over it. He had told me that they disagreed on things before, but it got really bad when she kicked Dean out of the house.
And no matter how I tried to reconcile it in my mind, I could only imagine if she were to go so far as to kick the man out of her house, there had to be a reason for it. Why on Earth would she go so far as to kick out someone she had been living with for ten years? That was a long time to be with anyone, and to think that she had told him to get out entirely – to not even come around to see her – that had to indicate something big went down.
Damon always tried to shrug it off as the two of them got into a disagreement and called it off, but that had to be bigger than a disagreement. Ten year relationships that were allegedly as good as what Damon said Dean and Susan had weren’t just called off entirely over a disagreement.
Yet, on the same note, why did she bring him back into the house so suddenly? To me, it seemed they had just started dating when he was suddenly back completely. He was living in her house, sleeping in her room, helping her raise her foster kids. He went from nothing to everything in the house practically overnight, and I was expected to just let it all go as though it was the most normal thing in the world.
I sighed. It was hard stressing about so many things, and now that I was even more suspicious of Dean, it was getting a lot worse. But then, my thoughts were interrupted by the sound of angry voices coming up the stairs. My first thought was that Damon and Susan were having one of their famous arguments, but I knew Damon’s voice well enough now to realize that was Dean shouting downstairs.
And Susan was shouting right back at him. My blood ran cold, and I felt a knot form in the pit of my stomach. Of course, them fighting might lead to him moving out again, but I couldn’t help but think that it had something to do with what I had asked at dinner.
This was the first time I had heard a fight take place between the two of them, and while I couldn’t make out the words they were saying, they sounded very heated. Part of me wanted to go downstairs and try to smooth things over. Maybe I could tell them that I just wanted to know more about my parents again.
Then again, the house had been so full of tension lately, I didn’t want to keep putting myself in the middle. This was a fight between the adults in the house, and it didn’t seem like the sort of thing I really wanted to get myself involved in.
A slight knock on my door startled me, and I turned as Damon opened it a crack and poked his head in the room.
“Is everything alright down there?” I asked as I pointed to the floor.
“They’re fine,” Damon said with a wave of his hand. “They get pretty loud when they argue, but it passes.”
“Dang,” I said with a shake of my head.
“Anyway, I’m heading off to a fight,” he said.
“Do you want me to come?” I asked. I didn’t really feel like going, but at the same time, I didn’t really want to sit and listen to the fighting, either. But, Damon shook his head.
“This is my last one, and I’m done for good,” he said with a smile. “Let’s just let it go and forget about it.”
I smiled in return. “That sounds like a great plan.”
Chapter 20
Damon
The mat came up fast, and before I even realized what was happening, I slammed into it. It was rare for my opponent to get in a good blow, but this guy was tough.
As I walked into the ring that night, I’d imagined I would be fighting Chad all over again. Or Trent. Or a combination of the two. I would wrap all the frustration I had against the other guys at school and the other people in my life and harness that into the power I brought into the fight, landing blow after blow on this guy until the ref stepped in and made me back down.
But, the guy was better than I thought he would be, and more than once he threw me against the ropes and to the ground. I knew what I was doing in the ring, however, and I wasn’t going to let him knock me out that easily. Each time I hit the floor, I rolled to the side before he had the chance to land on me, making it impossible for me to keep me down for the four seconds he had to.
I was up again in an instant, landing more blows on him and doing my best to get him to the ground. I knew my own tricks, and the couple of times I managed to get him to the floor I was on him like a cat, trying to hold him down until the ref blew the whistle.
More than once I nearly had him when he managed to slide out of my grasp once more, or hit me from below and knock me off balance enough for him to get back to his feet. I was determined to win, however. I wasn’t going to let him get the upper hand, not on my watch.
Finally, I wrapped my arms around his neck and fell back, dragging him to the ground with me. Together, we hit the mat and I rolled over the top of him, grabbing his arms and holding him back so he couldn’t hit me with his fist as he tried to swing back up and over his head.
He threw his head back, trying to nail me in the face with the back of his skull, but I was ready for that, too. I moved my head out of the way, making him miss his mark. He tried once more, but time was up. The ref blew the whistle and made the signal, and I let him go.
He
slid to the floor, and though he was up again in an instant, it was too late. I had won the fight. It was over. The ref took my hand and held it up in victory, much to the delight of the cheering crowd. I looked around the room. There were some faces I recognized from high school, but as usual, I didn’t know most of the people who were present.
One of the other workers was gathering the money from the bets, sorting out the pay for the fight as well as the winners for those who had put money on me. It was a good feeling, knowing that this was the last time I ever had to do anything like this. I had thought more than once I was going to make this my career, but something had changed in me over the past couple months.
Now, I didn’t want to fight for a living. In fact, I was really looking forward to getting out of this for good. Not for Susan, not for Sutton, even, but for me. I didn’t want to live this life anymore, and once that debt was paid, I was in the clear. I could do anything I wanted and I wouldn’t have to worry about a thing.
The guy collecting the money shoved a wad of cash in my hand on my way out of the ring, and I counted it as I stepped to the floor. There was no hiding the smile on my face. This was more than enough to pay for the rest of my debt, and I would have some left over besides.
Maybe I would surprise Sutton with a treat, maybe I would put it toward a new bike. Either way, I was going to celebrate somehow. This was a big deal. I was finally done with the ring, done with all this. And I felt on top of the world.
After I got cleaned up, I would pay up, then I would be out of there.
As I sponged off my bruises and scraped in the bathroom, I almost wished I had taken Sutton up on her offer to come with me. She was good at patching me up after a fight, and I already dreaded going home to get the lecture from Susan. I knew she would be in a bad mood after her fight with Dean, and she was bound to take some of that out on me.
I would tell her that it was my last one, but I had a feeling that wasn’t going to help much. This guy was tougher than most, and I certainly looked worse for wear. Part of me was glad I didn’t have to go to school in this condition. I had sported a black eye after my fight with Chad, but this was far more noticeable.
After I put the last of the bandages on, I pulled on a clean shirt and shoved my sweaty shorts in my bag, then I counted out the money on the sink. I kept the lesser amount for myself, putting that back in my bag but hiding it near the bottom so no one would see it if they happened to get a glance inside.
The rest of it I folded in half and put in an envelope, carrying it with me out the back of Louie’s and into the alley. As suspected, three dark figures were standing in the shadows, all with their hoods up and over their heads like they were gangsters, their hands on their pockets as they waited for me.
“That was some fight,” the voice cut through the darkness like a knife. “I’m glad you didn’t lose your nerve at the end. There were a couple of times I thought I might have bet on the wrong fighter.”
“I had everything under control,” I said as I thrust the money into the shadow. He snatched it from my hand, and I heard him tear off the top of the envelope before counting the bills. “That’s the rest of it, and I’m done with this.”
The three men all started laughing at the same time, and my blood started to boil. I hated the way they treated me, and I wanted to start throwing my fists all over again. I hated that I owed them money in the first place, and I hated that I couldn’t tell them what was really on my mind now. But, I reminded myself that this was the last time I ever had to deal with them, and I could move on with my life and not have to ever think about them again.
That is, until their leader spoke.
“You think that, but we have ways of changing the game,” he said.
“What are you talking about?” I snapped. “I agreed to pay you back what I owed you, and that was the end of it. I don’t want to do this anymore, and you can’t make me.”
“Oh, excuse me,” he sneered. “But as I recall, you aren’t the one who makes the rules around here. I am. And if I say we’re going to squeeze every single dollar out of you then that’s what we’re going to do.”
“You already did!” I snapped.
The laughter that came in response was icy, but once again, it made my blood boil. I wanted to scream at them, to tell them to get out of my face and drop dead, but I didn’t want to give into the antagonization. They clearly were trying to get a rise out of me, and I hated that it was working. But, there was something about this group that was able to really push my buttons.
More than anyone else I had to deal with at school, or even the way I related to Susan. No, with the way they spoke, the way they lorded over me, I was just filled with an utter rage that made me want to start tearing into all of them and tell them how I really felt about the situation.
They didn’t own me, and as far as I was concerned, this was a business transaction. Once I was done with my part of the deal, then it was closed and over. And I had upheld my side of the bargain, so I expected them to do the same.
“Oh, Damon, how innocent you are despite the front you put up against the world. That was a good fight, I’ll give you that, but I can promise you, that wasn’t your last. Trust me when I say I know we can get you back in that ring, and we’re going to. You aren’t walking away this easily,” he sneered.
I clenched my fists, but before I had the chance to say anything else, the three of them turned and walked up the alley. They walked silently, disappearing around the corner and leaving me alone with my thoughts. Part of me wanted to give them all the money I had left in my bag and tell them that was it, but I knew it wasn’t going to be enough.
If they thought that they could get more out of me, they were going to try. I knew they would. I should have known before I agreed to this stupid deal in the first place. But, I was a different person then, and I was paying for it now. So many things I had done before I now regretted, and I wished I could go back and change it all.
I didn’t want to keep dealing with the consequences of being the person I had been years ago, but those consequences were still following me around, haunting me and whispering in my ear they had a grip on my life and I really couldn’t just walk away from them.
I turned to head home, trying to fight the frustration that was nearing a breaking point in the back of my mind. I didn’t know how I was going to get out of this, though I was still determined to stand my ground. I didn’t know how far those guys would go to try to get me back in the ring, and I worried they meant it when they said they weren’t done with me yet.
Still, there wasn’t anything I could do about it now. I was on my way home, and all I could do was wait and see what came next. Maybe they were just blowing smoke, and they would leave me alone now that they had the rest of their money.
That had been the deal from the beginning, and I had a feeling they wouldn’t want things to get messy. It was easier to do things by the books and move on than it was to keep sneaking around and trying not to get caught.
Then again, these weren’t exactly the kind of guys who cared if they got in trouble or not. They were just like I was a couple of years ago – they were the very people I didn’t want to be anymore.
But, all I could do now was make better decisions and try to change. Nothing else could fix this.
I had to take it in steps. One day at a time.
Chapter 21
Sutton
I groggily woke up and looked around the room, the thoughts rushing through my brain. I had been on my computer working on homework, but I was easily distracted with all the other things I had going on in my brain. As much as I tried to focus on just school, I kept thinking about Damon and how he had been so shaken after his interaction with his dad.
I wanted to finally get the answers we were looking for. I wanted to know if Richard was even possibly responsible for my parents’ murder. All we knew now was that he was abusive and had violent tendencies, but did that necessarily mean he was capable of murde
r?
As hard as it was for me to admit, we couldn’t go around and accuse someone of such a serious crime when we had no way of knowing whether they were even capable of such a thing. Simply because Richard was one of the worst parents on the planet, it didn’t mean that he was, in fact, the one who had killed my own.
But, with the thought floating around in our minds that he could be our guy – well, it was enough to drive us both insane. I wanted to have answers because I wanted my parents to have justice. Damon wanted to have answers because he wanted to know if he was related to someone who was capable of committing murder.
Either way, we both knew that we had to figure out more about Richard, and I wanted to do it on my own. If he was the killer, then I didn’t want to find out at the same time Damon did. It was hard enough seeing him take the news of his mother’s death, I wasn’t sure how he would react knowing that his father had killed my own parents.
But, there was also the pressing need to get through the stack of papers that was sitting on my desk, too. I had a lot of homework to do, and I wanted to keep up with it as it came in. The last thing I wanted to happen was to fall behind the rest of the class.
This was our last year, and I wanted to finish strong. I had been through so much in my school career already, so I wanted to finish out with all the same grades I’d managed to keep throughout all my academics. As difficult as it was to focus on school with everything else that was going on, I was determined.
But, the fatigue had gotten the best of me, and no matter how hard I tried to get through the notes and the paperwork that was piled on my desk, I knew now I had to get some sleep or I would be useless in the morning. So, I dragged myself from where I’d fallen asleep at my desk and fell into bed. I closed my eyes, ready to drift off into sleep once more when suddenly another thought popped into my brain.