“What happened with the baby?” I asked as Nikolas slowed down the treadmill.
“Are you sure you don’t want to ask London about this?” he asked and I shrugged.
“I don’t want to bring up anything that can hurt her. She needs to recover before we rehash anything from the past,” I confided in him.
“After my daughter called me I sent two of my men for her, but they did not get there fast enough. Hillary had taken her from her hospital bed and thrown her down the stairs. When the doctors found her she was bleeding and they had to deliver the baby immediately. London almost died, but the doctors saved her. The baby however did not survive the fall. London asked Sister Katherine to bury her and then Hillary had us both. Brooklyn had to come for us, but out there at the back of my property sitting next to the old vineyard is an apple tree that London planted. It shades your daughters grave.”
“Under the apple tree?” I asked as I looked out his window and saw the sun shining through the trees onto something that sat under it. London had the time to know she was pregnant and she had time to grieve, but I hadn’t. I turned away from Nikolas and walked outside and sat beside the tiny gravestone and told my daughter a story about her amazing mom who once pretended she was a pirate as we searched for hidden treasure in the lake that sat along our orchard.
I was asleep in the recliner chair when I heard London stir. I opened my eyes to see Sister Katherine had joined us overnight and was sitting beside her, holding her hand.
“What day is it?” she asked Sister Katherine as she looked over at me. A her lips curved on one side as she debated her answer.
What is with the look she only asked for the date?
“It’s the twelfth,” she resounded against her judgment. I could see something weighing on her.
“I missed it,” London sobbed. “I always have cake on her birthday. Makes me feel like I’m with her.”
“We can have cake today, together,” I spoke softly and London nodded she approved, but tears still fell.
“What’s with the waterworks?” Brooklyn asked as Mark rolled her in in a wheelchair with the new baby. “I thought you might want to hold your niece today.”
“Still no name?” Sister Katherine asked and London smiled as she carefully took her with a cast on one arm.
“I had a dream and in it I got to talk to mom. She said to tell you to name her Storm, because she will make you laugh when you dance around her, she will make you cry when you least expect it, and she will make everything grow with her. She said it was exactly what the rain does when we aren’t expecting it.”
“You sound just like her,” Brooklyn admitted and tried to hide her glistening face while London held onto the tiny baby with her cast and baby storm held onto her finger from the other hand and wouldn’t let go.
“Stormy?” Mark toyed with the name a few times and then gave his I don’t know look. “You want to call her Stormy Stone?”
Everyone laughed and woke the sleeping little one. Brooklyn took her back and promised it would be a nick name.
“I’m going to give you two a little time together,” Sister Katherine excused herself and found her way out of the room. I got up and walked over to the chair that was next to the bed and sat down. I took London’s hand in mine and gave it a light squeeze.
“I think we should try dating,” I spoke out and she laughed “We have done the sex thing - always a chart topper, we have done the friend thing - definitely my best decision, and now we have added life saving, trespassing, breaking and entering, torture, theft of a plane and whatever else Brooklyn and your dad promised to ignore and/or hide so we aren’t charged. I think we should try dating.”
“Do you still want me?” She asked as she cried. “This is your out. I’m scarred up, and have night terrors from what happened. I’m a therapists dream and an endless work in progress. If you want out -,” she tried to finish, but I stood up, leaned over, and placed my lips on her swollen bruised lips and kissed her as softly as I could. When I pulled away her fingers went to her lips.
“I’m not going anywhere. Your scars do not turn me off or offend me. I know what it feels like to be loved by you. I know you’re the woman of my dreams, and I know that I want to know you again. No secrets, no lies, and no hiding anything from each other.”
I pulled a tiny little black box from my pocket and opened it and showed her the silver band that held a two carat princess cut diamond with two black diamonds beside it. It had belonged to my mother and I wanted her to have it.
“I want you to wear this to remember those lessons Sister Katherine taught us. Your barrel is only heavy when you’re alone. You’re only unsteady without me. You’re my apple, my life. I need you to remember when it gets hard its only that way for a minute and we’ll fix whatever is wrong. I’m going to be right here to help you, and so is the rest of your family. We all love you so much that the waiting room is full of Russian thugs making the nurses nervous. You’ve never been alone, you weren’t like me. You weren’t cast aside London, they wanted you to be better than them. They wanted you to have a life that would keep you safe.”
“For a second I thought you were proposing,” she tried to make it a joke, but I could see the anxiety lingering on her face as it aged her before me. She worried too much and that was something I was going to help her with.
“No, that’s what this ring is for,” I pulled another box out of my pocket. “But you aren’t ready. Not yet. I’m going to ask, but not until I’m sure you’re ready, and only when its the right time.”
The machine beeped and I knew she was getting another dose of pain medicine. She yawned and tried to fight the slumber it was pulling her into, but it was a losing battle.
“I’ll meet you in the orchard,” she answered and I smiled.
“Get some sleep,” I told her as I leaned down and placed my warm lips on hers as they swelled from her crying and my earlier kiss. They were so soft and delicious I felt as though I could kiss her all day. When I pulled away her fingers went to her lips as she had always done as if some part of me lingered there with her.
I sat on the edge of the bed and sang to her as I had done after she had nightmares about being abandoned when she was little.
“Logan,” Mark called my name. I stood up and stepped outside the door.
“Everything okay?” I asked and he nodded.
“I’m going to take Brooklyn back to New York. She wants London transferred there because the family is keeping everyone on edge down here. The doctors said they can only move her in an ambulance, and well my wife stole a helicopter in hopes you could fly us all home.”
“When does her get out of jail free card run out?” I laughed.
“When people realize she is not as cute as she thinks she is,” he returned and we both laughed. “No, she got an air medic to agree to fly us, but he needs a second man in the seat beside him.”
“I’ll help take her home.”
Chapter Thirty Four
London
“How do you feel?” Brooklyn asked as I held her new baby girl. She looked so much like our mom. She had our skin tone, our cobalt eyes, and raven hair, but she had Mark’s dimples, and she looked at Brooklyn with as much love as he did.
“She’s gorgeous,” I told Brooklyn as I held her in my arms.
“I want you to hold her while I go get something,” Brooklyn was being her normal covert self as she stepped out of her apartment. I ignored her and stared at the baby in my arms and saw my baby that had passed away. The daughter I missed more than anything on the planet.
“Happy Birthday,” Brooklyn started singing as she opened the door and a large group of people followed her into the apartment with balloons and presents.
“It’s not my birthday,” I told her as she handed me the cake.
“No, but you missed mine,” a little girl spoke as she walked into the room holding Logan’s hand. Her mom followed and I was really confused until Logan spoke.
“This is my conscious, her name is Ada.”
“Blow out the candles Ada,” Brooklyn told her and she did.
“I’ve been waiting to meet you,” Ada spoke to me and ignored the two candles that didn’t get blown out. “I have some questions for you.” Everyone seemed to laugh at a joke I wasn’t privy to.
“What would you like to know,” I asked as Brooklyn took her baby back from me.
“What are your intentions with Logan?” She asked a loaded question.
“I intend to date him, have fun with him, and make him happy.”
“You do know he sucks at magic, right?” She asked and Logan turned to her mother and gave her a I can’t believe you look. “You also know he gets homesick?”
“I didn’t, but we are starting over and just getting to know each other. We spent our child years together, but we don’t know much about each other as adults.”
“Well don’t garden with him in the morning and he will never tell you where the donkey is in his magic trick. If you hurt him or make him cry you have to answer to me,” she then turned and walked over and started opening her presents. “Also, you should really get up and move around you don’t want to have a stroke,” she told me without breaking eye contact with her presents. I was a bit taken back.
“Ada doesn’t have a filter,” he backed her up.
“She must have learned that from the little Logan I remember who was the exact same way,” I chided and he smiled.
“I’m Lisa,” the mom with dirty blond hair spoke up as she moved into the room. “You have a really good man in Logan,” she smiled as she looked at Logan and I swallowed hard. She looked at him as though she loved him and it turned my stomach. I went back and forth between jealousy and disgust. Had they?
The party was great and I was glad to finally be up and out of the hospital, but some of this was a bit much for me. I was exhausted and tired of pretending that my pain meds hadn’t wore off hours ago. I turned in my wheelchair to move toward the room I shared with Brooklyn’s daughter Isabella Nicole.
“You’re his gravity,” Ada told me when she climbed up on my wheelchair and looked at the necklace my dad had given me. It matched one he gave to Brooklyn. It was a noose. A significant reminder that only I could hang myself. No one else was capable of taking me down.
“What?”
“You keep Logan grounded. He needs that in his life. I don’t see him sad and alone all the time anymore,” she lectured me on what I needed to do to win his heart once more as I looked over her head and saw him watching us. “You need to get out of this chair and go to him. Show him he’s worth you getting up,” she pushed and I looked over to see Lisa getting excited.
“I haven’t gotten up since my accident almost three weeks ago I don’t know that I won’t fall,” I honestly told her as she flicked her hair over her shoulder as Brooklyn did when she got frustrated.
“Logan said you two had a baby, where is she?” Ada asked and my heart sank, but it wasn’t as bad as it was before. I saw her in my medicated dreams and knew she was in Heaven with my mom.
“She died a long time ago,” I told her and thought of my angel as an angel.
“Since she can’t be here I’ll take over for her. Let’s get out of this chair. Come on London, I won’t let you fall,” Ada spoke just like a little Logan as she climbed off the chair and held out her hand for me. I looked around the room to see everyone mingling as they ignored us. No one was looking at me anymore, so I trusted her and pulled the blanket off my legs.
I shifted my body to let my feet dangle in between the foot rests. Sister Katherine moved into the doorway and her face fell as she saw me trying to get up. She started to push through people to get to me, when I held up my hand to stop her.
Ada locked the wheel chair, reached out, and took my hand. I pulled myself up from the frame and put weight on my legs for the first time in what felt like ages.
“You got this. You just need to believe it,” she cheered me on as dizziness impaired my vision. I closed my eyes and cleared my head. I tuned everyone and everything out except for the strength this little girl was lending to me.
When I opened my eyes everyone was silent and watching me. My father was standing in the doorway next to Sister Katherine. My sister handed her new baby to Mark as she prepared to save me from my own acrobatics of trying to put one foot in front of the other. Everyone was there ready and willing to protect me. I was basking in love and didn’t even recognize it till I saw it from Logan’s eyes.
I kept one hand on the chair as my body ached and protested the movement. Ada held my other hand as I slid my feet across the icy floor. Logan put his cup down and looked like he was preparing to save me from myself like everyone else.
I took what felt like miles of steps until I was in front of Logan. My ribs ached, my legs trembled having to bear actual weight. I felt nauseous as pain ripped my body apart, but I smiled for everyone as if I was fine.
“Logan, I found what keeps you centered to the Earth,” Ada announced and awe’s were heard across the room. “My new best friend London was made for my old best friend Logan,” she continued. When Logan didn’t move, he just watched her preach she got irritated with him. “Take her before she falls for someone else,” Ada demanded and everyone laughed. Then she put her hand up and I leaned down carefully as she whispered in my ear. “Sometimes you have to lead him to the kool-aid before he drinks it.”
I busted out laughing as my body protested. Logan took me in his arms to keep me from falling as Ada smiled a huge grin for her mom and Lisa gave her a thumbs up.
“I think they’re trying to say we’re meant for each other,” I explained as I wrapped my arms around Logan’s neck and held on.
“That part I knew,” he admitted as he kissed me. The people around us cheered, but their voices faded as his kiss deepened. Soon I forgot anyone was even around us, as his tongue entered my mouth. I got whiplash as his flavor invaded me, and my body painfully sprung to life. He breathlessly pulled away and looked down at the little girl who had convinced me to stand up and go to Logan. He gave her a thank you and she gleamed with pride.
“My work here is done,” she told Logan and we all laughed. She was definitely part of our family. The perfect blend of sarcasm and humor, Ada was going to fit right in.
Chapter Thirty Five
Logan
“Tom Hardy, Tom Ellis, Tom Hiddleston,” I heard London speak with laughter in the other room.
“Your order is wrong, Hiddleston should be in the fuck column not the Green Mile column,” Kate laughed as I walked in to see London on the gray couch laughing with both women while their babies slept in a play pen across from them.
“Who?” I asked butting into some kind of female pow wow that I shouldn’t be a part of from the looks on their faces.
“We’re playing Fuck, Marry, Kill,” Kate explained like I knew what that meant. “We have letters folded up on paper in a box. We reach in and pick out a letter then we have to name a person with that letter starting their name as to who we would fuck, marry, or kill, but we can’t use a person someone else has in their group.”
“You want to fuck Tom Hardy, marry Tom Ellis, and kill Tom Hiddleston?” I asked as I looked at London. She batted her eyes at me. “Is it the accent?” I asked and she blew me a kiss. “I knew you always wanted me to be British,” I sarcastically spoke with an accent.
“You know I only have eyes for you, but if Tom Hardy wanted a threesome its non-negotiable. Some people just have to be fucked by us so we don’t die with regrets,” she chuckled and the ladies agreed. “Actually, I think I would just fuck Tom Ellis and marry Tom Hardy. The threesomes with both my husbands would be something they made porno’s about.”
I walked over and carefully lifted her from her seat on the couch and then walked around and sat down placing her in my lap. Everyone froze and I knew - this was a no testosterone zone.
“You hungry?” I asked and all of them gave me a look th
at said they were never not hungry. I gave London a kiss and put her back on the couch. I left the room to call in for some take out when I heard giggling again.
“Taylor Lautner, Tom Brady, Tom Cruise,” I heard Brooklyn speak.
“No, mine tops all of yours. Tobey Maguire because who doesn’t want to do Spiderman. Tom Hanks because he’s been around inside my television all my life and won’t leave me for a younger woman. Tommy Lee because he’s already done everyone so his time is up anyway,” laughter echoed through the apartment and I couldn’t help but smile. I was glad to see London doing so much better.
I couldn’t wait to see her back to normal. She still wore a cast that she constantly shoved hangers and pencils in to scratch the flesh she claimed was itchy, but she was near drawing blood these days. She walked with a walker because the fracture in her hip hadn’t quite healed just yet. She had gotten up too soon to try and prove something to me the night of Ada’s birthday party and it had set her back with her physical therapy.
“None of us want Tom Pelphrey for anything, not even to be our ‘Guiding Light?’” Brooklyn asked with sarcasm and the girls just laughed again.
“Is it sad that I forgot about him?” London asked with a smile. “Can I change my answers?”
“No, they were the final answers,” Kate chuckled as she put the letter back in the box and mixed up the papers.
“Are you ready to go back to work?” Brooklyn asked and I peeked around the corner to see London’s face fall.
“No, I’m not ready,” she spoke the words, but her lip curled like it always did when she lied. Every time I had brought up going back she would change the subject. I thought maybe it was part of the trauma, but to lie and keep more secrets would just tear us apart once more.
Unsteady Page 23