by Tamara Gill
“I thought ye looked in need of a thorough kissing.” His brogue was thick and laden with desire.
“You can kiss me anytime you like.” And he could, especially if he continued to look at her as if she was the whole world. She cleared her throat. “So, what are we doing here? This looks like you have work for me to do.”
He gestured to the trees. “’Tis Beltane tomorrow and today we collect the wood for the fires.” He pulled her toward the trees. “Ye are going to help me fell a tree with this saw. Not a large one, so dinna be scared, but just a small one that I’m sure ye will be able to handle.”
Kenzie turned and watched the other clansmen at work. The cutting down of the larger trees looked hard, and even in the fresh morning air, sweat poured off their brows. Others worked axes into the fallen trees, cutting the limbs into smaller lengths and placing them onto waiting carts. “How many trees will you cut down for Beltane?”
“We gather the smaller limbs that fall off through the year, so we dinna normally cut down more than ten trees and we scatter the cutting so as not to leave one place in the forest bare of growth.”
Good idea. Kenzie took the saw and walked it over to the small tree that Ben stood beside. “So, we’re to cut this one down?”
“Looks as good as any other.” He lifted his side of the saw and, working in unison they started to cut down the tree. It didn’t take long for it to fall, since it was ridiculously small compared to some of the others, but at least Kenzie had contributed a little to Beltane.
Ben shouted out for some of the clansmen nearby to come and put the wood on the cart. Kenzie looked about the grove. It was a beautiful place, smelled of wooded undergrowth with a sprinkling of pine. Although she couldn’t spy any of those types of trees.
“What’s that sound?” she asked, turning her head toward what she thought might be running water.”
“The workers, lass,” Ben said, lifting some smaller branches and placing them on the cart. As they worked, the day became warmer, not hot by any means, but comfortable, considering they were in Scotland.
Kenzie helped where she could, but eventually she sat on an old, rotting log and watched as Ben worked with the men, getting what they needed for Beltane. In her time, people just lit bonfires and used the old ancient pagan tradition as a reason to get drunk and have fun with friends.
To see Beltane in this time would be something. From the earnestness of it all, medieval Scotland certainly took the night a lot more seriously than people did in her time.
One of the workers came back with wet hair and Kenzie stood. “Ben, that man looks like he’s had a swim. There is water nearby, isn’t there? I thought I could hear water running.”
He stopped what he was doing, running a hand through his hair and pushing it off his face. Her heart flip-flopped at the sight of him—rumpled, sweaty, marks of dirt across his face where he’d wiped at the dripping sweat. “Oh ay, sorry, lass. Yes, there’s a stream and small waterfall a little way through those trees there,” he said, pointing over her shoulder. “If ye follow the animal path, you’ll come to it.”
“Will it be safe for me to go and have a look?”
“Aye, just yell if ye need anything.”
Kenzie nodded and started off in the direction Ben told her. The path was easy to see and well-used by the animals. The sound of rushing water became louder, and she gasped when she came to the pretty hidden spot.
The stream was narrow, and dark, mostly likely deep. She stood, looking down into the stone, moss, and soil walls of the little river. The waterfall flowed over the side into the pool beneath.
It was fast moving, white water bubbling up, but so inviting. Kenzie climbed down the side, taking care not to fall in but with the moss and damp ground underfoot it was precarious. Reaching the water’s edge, she pulled off her boots and stockings and slipped her feet into the water. It was cold, but not cold enough to be uncomfortable were you to swim in it.
She heard Ben call out her name, and she replied in turn, waiting for him to peer down at her from atop the river’s bank.
“What are ye doing down there, lass. Can ye swim?”
“I can swim.” She gestured for him to join her. “Come down here, and feel the water. It’s so refreshing.”
“Aye, do ye mean freezing enough that it would turn more than my lips blue should I fall in?”
Kenzie laughed. “Never fear, my liege. I shall warm you up again.”
The devilish glint in his eyes sent pleasure coiling between her legs. He came and sat beside her, leaning on his knees as he watched the water. “Are ye feeling better today, lass? I forgot to ask when we started out this morning.”
“I feel a lot better, thank you.” Kenzie shut her eyes and faced the sun, the warmth warming her all over. Not to mention the man beside her who warmed her from the inside out. To use a modern colloquialism, she had it bad.
“Have you ever swam here?”
“Aye, I used to bring Aline here, and we’d swim. ’Tis a private spot and peaceful.”
“Is this part of your land?” Kenzie thought about her time and how so much had changed. The forest they now sat in was a quarter of what it was now. Over the years, the trees had been felled for farmland. And never, in all her surveys of the land at Castle Ross had she come across this waterfall. It made her wonder if it was even there anymore, or if farming further north had changed the flow of the streams and it was no longer anything but a dry quarry.
“Yes, and once the celebrations of Beltane are finished tomorrow, I shall take ye about the property and show ye the farm, have ye meet the tenant farmers and such. I’d like ye to know all there is about Castle Ross before ye leave.”
Kenzie bit her lip, hating the thought of going anywhere that this strapping, Highlander beside her wasn’t. She would miss him, even though she was still getting to know him.
Standing, and taking care not to fall into the river, she pushed down his knees and straddled his legs, wrapping her arms about his neck. “I want to know all there is to know about you as well.”
“I need to make it up to them for leaving them alone these past months. With the preparations of Beltane underway, I’m hoping to make the celebration one they’ll no forget and mayhap one which they forgive their laird for being dumb-skulled.
“You were mourning, Ben. Of all things, people of this harsh time understand that emotion best, I think.” There was so much death in this time, not just from clan skirmishes but also disease. The hygiene here was nonexistent, and it was surprising that anyone survived at all. Why, just the other day, Kenzie had seen a servant empty a chamber pot out the window of her room and then throw a small bit of bread that she’d not finished into her mouth. Not so much as a washing of hands in-between the two things.
She wiggled a little closer to him and bit her lip at the obvious bulge. “I missed you last night.” Kenzie kissed the lobe of his ear, biting lightly before kissing his neck. His unshaved jaw rasped against her lips, and the need for him, the want inside her, doubled. “Will you come to me tonight, my liege?”
He clasped her ass and pushed her against him. She leaned forward and stole a kiss. “Why wait until tonight.”
Kenzie grinned, having not thought of that, but, in trews it wouldn’t be as easy as it would’ve been had she worn a dress. “What if ye men catch us? I’m in pants. It’s not like I can just shuffle my dress back down and hide what we’re about.”
His fingers clenched against her trews before sliding one of his hands and clasping her sex at the front. Kenzie gasped, having not expected that.
His eyes darkened. “Ye make me want ye so much, lass.”
“The feeling’s mutual,” she said, stifling a moan when he played with her through her pants. “God, I want you,” she said, breathless. Her climax was quick, and she wrapped her arms about his neck and enjoyed what his touch did to her.
She slumped against him, and it was some time before she gathered her wits. She kissed him and reve
led in his lustful gaze. “Now I need to swim to cool off.”
Ben helped her stand before, silently, he untied his sporran and kilt, lifting his shirt over his head and throwing it on the grassy bank. Then with a grin, he jumped feet first into the water.
He came up gasping. “’Tis freezing, lass. Come in,” he said, laughing.
Kenzie was already undressing before she too jumped in, coming up beside him. “You’re not wrong about that!” she laughed, wrapping her arms about Ben’s neck. He walked her to the side of the stream and pushed her against the bank. Kenzie wrapped her legs about his hips and grinned. “What are you going to do with me now?” she teased.
He slid inside her, and she moaned, throwing her head back against the grass. “That feels so good, Ben.” He fit her like a glove, knew what she enjoyed and what she liked. Was able to pleasure her with very little effort at all.
Ben gave little regard to being gentle and took her desperately. Not that she minded being fucked, for this was exactly what he was doing and doing it so well that she wanted more, so much more.
“When I saw ye in your trews this morn, I’ve been thinking of nothing but how to rid ye of them.” He kissed her hard, and she pulled him tighter against her, the coiling of pleasure getting tighter and tighter before he moaned and came hard, pumping into her with little care.
It was delicious.
They stayed like that for a time, before Ben stilled in her arms. He pulled out, his face devoid of color. “Wash yeself, lass.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Quickly now. Do as I say.”
“What are ye talking about. Why?” Kenzie did as he asked. What with the thunderous look on his face she’d not do anything else, but what was going on? “What’s wrong, Ben?”
He reached between her legs and helped clean her, and she pushed him away. “Stop. What are you doing?” Kenzie cleaned herself some more before it hit her what he was doing and why. “You came inside me. Is that what this is about?”
“Damn it,” he swore, glaring off toward the rivers bank. “I’m sorry, lass. ’Twas a mistake that I’ll not repeat again.” He mumbled something inaudible, before looking at her with such a lost expression her heart went out to him. “I’ve put ye at risk.”
“Ben, it’s unlikely I’ll fall pregnant. As a modern woman from the twenty-first century, I know when the fertile time of my cycle is, and it was two or more weeks ago. You’re panicking for nothing.” Kenzie finished washing herself and stepped from the water, leaving Ben staring after her. She shook out her clothes and started to fight getting into her pants since she was still wet. “You’re worrying about nothing.”
“Ye will not have my children.”
The words stung, and she quickly slid on her shirt and coat. “Thanks for ruining what was otherwise a memorable experience.” Kenzie scrambled up the river’s edge and heard Ben exit the water hard on her heels. He caught up to her on the top of the bank.
“I have my heir, I’m not looking to have any more. If ye think I’m angry at ye, lass I’m not. I’m angry at myself for losing my control, my wits, when I’m around ye.”
His words went some way in placating her, but it wasn’t enough. Not quite. “Why is it that you’re not going to have any more children? You’re young, why not marry again and have a whole army of Alasdairs in your nursery.”
Ben stopped some feet from her, and the look on his face was one of horror. What was going on?
“I’ll not marry again. Ever. So, if ye wish to seduce me again, ye must ensure I release out of ye, you must remind me of my duty.”
Kenzie laughed, the sound mocking. “Seriously?” She stepped up to him, nose to nose. “If I seduce you again and you forget to pull yourself out before coming, I will be the last person on earth who’ll remind you of your duty,” she said, spitting the word at him. “And you needn’t worry that I’ll fall pregnant and make you marry me. You know full well I’m not staying and won’t tie ye down. The famous Black Ben can continue sowing his wild oats all over Scotland like you have been.”
He gaped at her, and Kenzie regretted her words immediately. She took a calming breath.
“I have my reasons for not wanting any more children, lass. I needn’t tell you or anyone what they are, and I dinna need ye judging me about my choices.”
Ben’s accent was thick as his temper grew, but damn it, they’d made a mistake. His absurd reaction to it wasn’t necessary. “Maybe I should return to Gwen and Braxton’s home and leave you be. But just a word of warning, Laird of Ross. Ye may wish to send Athol back home with her brother before you’re married off to her without ye consent.”
He ground his teeth, and she turned on her heel and made for the grove where the echoing sound of men and woodcutters could be heard. Ben clasped her arm, ripping her about to face him.
“Mayhap ye should.”
His words were like a slap across the face. Kenzie ripped her arm from his grasp and glared at him. “I’m going back to the castle. Don’t follow me.” She did as she threatened, blinking away the prick of tears as she made it back to her horse. What was Ben’s problem? His overreaction to what they’d done was irrational. It was almost as if he was terrified of her becoming pregnant.
She shook her head. Maybe when they’d calmed down, he would tell her his reasons, but until then, he needed to stay exactly where he was. Well away from her.
Chapter Twelve
Ben stood beside the largest bonfire that burned before the gates of Castle Ross. The flames towered into the sky, and he was pleased that this Beltane had been successful so far. Everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves, all but one woman who sat on a stool, talking to Bruce. Kenzie was obviously not her bubbly, happy self. It was his fault, and he hated himself for it.
Yesterday, he’d acted like a brute, demanding she wash herself all because he’d lost control. Forced her to wash his seed away. Terrified that she would have his child.
Worse was the realization that the image of Kenzie round with his baby inside of her, left him both panicked yet with so much longing that for the last day he’d kept his distance from her. He’d come to realize that was exactly what he wanted.
Her…and everything I can have with her.
Tonight, he would explain his fear, and he hoped that it would be enough for her to forgive him his idiocy.
Athol sidled up beside him and clasped his arm, her breast rubbing indecently against his arm. He looked back at Kenzie and noted her narrowed glare aimed at him, before she turned toward Bruce and gave him her back.
He ground his teeth. Maddening woman!
“Would ye dance with me, Ben? Tonight, has been such a great celebration, but I dinna want it to be over without having one turn about the fire with ye.”
The clansmen surrounding him cheered him on, and conceding, Ben pulled her into a jig about the bonfire. With Athol in his arms, laughing up at him, he was almost transported back to last year’s Beltane. When Aline was alive, pregnant but still wanting to enjoy the festivities like everyone else.
Athol was so like her, but not so much in temperament. During the time Ben had been married to Aline, she had mellowed, grown kinder and more understanding of those about her. Athol had not. If anything, Ben had the impression the lass was spoiled and used to getting her own way.
He looked down at the lass and didn’t mistake the asking in her eyes for more. The dance changed, and he passed her onto another clansman while he took the arm of his cook. The rotund woman laughed at having him as a partner and Ben laughed too, for the first time that night.
The dance went on, and when he turned to take his final partner’s hand, pleasure almost brought him to his knees. Kenzie.
“Ye look beautiful this eve, lass. A gift given to us through time.”
“Now you’re flattering me, Ben?” Her tone sounded bored and dread coiled in his gut. He pulled her out of the dance and walked her a little out of the light and away from his clansmen.
“I owe ye an apology for ha
ndling ye roughly yesterday in the water, making ye wash yourself as if the thought of ye having my child repulsed me.”
Her emerald eyes met his and he fought not to pull her into his arms and kiss her. Show her just how sorry he was for acting the medieval ass.
“Are ye repulsed by the thought of me pregnant with your baby?”
“Nay, never that. Ye know that Aline died after having Alasdair. Well, the reason behind her death was not only because of the child but a tumor in her womb. The clan healer believed it at first to be another child, but during the birth it became known that it was not. She bled to death in my arms. I will not risk another woman for the sake of offspring.”
Kenzie sighed. “Life is a risk, Ben. Living in this time, you, of all people, should know this. You cannot save everyone. It’s not possible.”
She was right, and yet the guilt of tupping Aline each and every night in order to have a child still tormented him. He’d not had a care for her health, having not thought he’d lose her solely due to having a baby. But his tupping had been her death sentence, and he couldn’t forgive himself for that. No matter what Aline had said on her deathbed or what Kenzie said now. His wife was dead, and it was his fault.
“Just so you know, there is no threat to me in regard to having your child. No doubt you’re aware that women bleed once a month. Well, let’s just say my once-a-month has started.”
He would be lying if he said he didn’t feel an overwhelming sense of relief. Ben said a silent thank you to God and pushed a flyaway lock of her hair behind her ear. “I’m sorry for yesterday, lass. Say ye forgive me.”
She half-smiled up at him, and for the first time since their fight, it was as if the sun shone in the middle of the night. “I’m sorry, too.”
“I want to kiss ye so much, lass,” he said, leaning down and whispering the words against her ear.
“Why don’t you then?” She raised her brow, tempting him beyond thought or reason.
“There ye are, my liege. Brother has already returned to the castle, and I have no one to escort me.” Athol took Ben’s arm, and Kenzie stepped away, giving him space.