by Joanna Blake
It was unheard of. Especially mid season. Especially with a rookie.
“Hopefully this will help you make your decision. You are our first choice by the way. Everybody else is on hold until you decide.”
He slid an envelope across the table to me. I opened it. The check inside was more money that I’d ever imagined.
“Is this for the year?”
“That’s a signing bonus, son. Your pay is double that. Per season. Five year contract.”
I exhaled sharply. Nobody got five year contracts anymore. Not for this much money. This was the chance of a lifetime. I would be crazy not to take it.
“I’m excited. I just need to go over a few things with my rep.”
“Of course. Just get us the contracts within forty eight hours. We’re ready to move ahead.”
We shook hands and stood. That was it. I was a pro-ball player.
“How’s your eye?”
He pointed to his own eye. I knew what he meant. I still had one hell of a bruise.
“It’s all good.”
“There was some trouble. With a girl I believe?”
“My girlfriend got jumped by some scum bags. I took care of it.”
He laughed.
“If that doesn’t sound like drama, I don’t know what is.”
I smirked.
“She attracts a lot of attention. But I think down here I could keep an eye on her.”
He nodded.
“So its a package deal then?”
“Yeah, I need to get my mom and my lady set up as well.”
“We can help with that. We get a nice discount with a few of the new condos around here. They like having players move in. Family too.”
“That would be great.”
“I don’t want to dissuade you, but you do realize how hot the women in Miami are right? You could have your pick.”
I grinned.
“I already do.”
“Fair enough.”
I left the stadium and got into the town car they’d provided. On the way back to the hotel I couldn’t help but smile, imagining my new life here. Of course, that included my woman, if I could just fucking find her.
I had to face facts though. She’d ghosted on me. And when I found her, I was going to make her pay for it.
I pulled out my phone and called my mom. She’d been worried about me since the fight, I knew.
“How’d you like to move to Miami?”
Nadine
The Y had free wifi and a small library. I was in there for the second day in a row. All day. I’d brought all my stuff with me. It stayed there, locked up over night. That was the only way I knew my charming family wouldn’t steal it.
So far I’d found a couple of live in nanny jobs and a caretaker job on the west coast. I’d sent off my resume and hoped for the best. California sounded nice. It was warm. Spacious.
Far from here.
I’d also scoured for local waitressing jobs. I’d heard of jobs at resorts and country clubs where your housing was part of the pay. I’d applied to twenty jobs at least, using Casey as a reference. He and Lana were the only people who knew that I’d left.
I closed my eyes, imagining how James must have felt when he’d realized I was gone.
Relieved maybe.
But somehow, I doubted it. I was starting to think he might be devastated. As devastated as I felt even.
It was possible, wasn’t it?
It should have made me feel better. Instead, I felt worse.
They were shutting down for the night so I packed my stuff up. I waited until nobody was looking and hid my laptop into the deepest part of my duffle bag. Then I grabbed a set of clean clothes and shoved them into my book bag.
I figured my stuff was safe here over night. Safer than at home anyway.
On the way home I grabbed a sandwich and a bottle of water. I had a book from the library. I figured I could lock myself in my room again.
Where it was safe.
The music was blasting as usual. The TV was also on. I waved at my mom and headed up the stairs, reminding myself to get earplugs the next time I went out.
I ate my sandwich and read until I got tired. I stared out the window for a while, watching the neighborhood come and go. Not much had changed.
Maybe I hadn’t changed either.
Around three AM I woke up. It took me a minute to figure out what was wrong. I turned on the light and stared at the door.
The doorknob was rattling.
A sick feeling settled in my chest.
I knew who it was.
Steve.
So many nights I had woken up to him creeping at my door. I’d had enough by the time he finally got up the courage to pick the lock. I’d hidden from him that night. By morning, I was gone.
I wanted to open the door and punch him. I wanted to scream at him. Tell my mother how bad he’d scared me all those years ago.
I wanted to push his ass down the stairs and out of my mother’s life.
Instead I flipped off the light and sat there in the dark. Eventually he went away. I knew that if I stayed here he’d pick the lock again in time.
I was running out of time. I had a few days grace period at best.
After that, I’d have to fight.
There was no way in hell I was letting him put his hands on me. Not him, or anyone else I didn’t want. Not when I knew how good it could be.
James had shown me that at the very least. And so much more.
In the morning I took a hasty shower. It was safe at this hour. After drinking all night they were rarely up before noon.
I stepped outside and saw Mrs. Fitzpatrick. She was on her porch, struggling to get something down the stairs. I was about to help her when I realized what was about to happen.
If she saw me, she’d tell James.
But maybe by now, he didn’t care anyway. He probably had moved on. Maybe she didn’t even know about us.
Still, it seemed better to sneak off without saying anything…
“Deanie? Is that you?”
Oops. Too late now.
“Hi Mrs. Fitzpatrick. Can I help you with that?”
“Oh would you dear? I’m moving.”
I took the box to the curb and lowered it. I was happy for her. She’d always been a lot classier than the neighborhood. But as a single mother and a widow, she’d been stuck here with the rest of us.
“That’s nice. Where are you moving to?”
“Down south. I can’t wait to be warm all year long!”
“That sounds lovely.”
“It does, doesn’t it? Are you staying here long?”
“No. I just came back to get a few things sorted out.”
She smiled at me knowingly, putting her hand on my shoulder.
“I know it hasn’t been easy for you Deany. You’re a good girl. You’ll be fine.”
I felt my eyes well up. At least someone believed in me. If only I believed in myself.
“Come in, have a cup of coffee.”
I knew I should say no but I wanted to go in. I wanted to bask in the warmth of her kitchen one more time. It would be almost as good as seeing James again. But I had to find a way out of this situation.
“Thanks Mrs. Fitzgerald. Another time.”
I didn’t mean it. She didn’t have to know that though.
“Don’t be a stranger!”
Chapter Twenty
James
I tipped the delivery guy and closed the door. I turned around and saw Honeysuckle pacing back and forth impatiently in front of her bowl.
“Alright, alright! I got it.”
I stacked the cans from the pet store on the counter. I shook the box of dry food, making her stop and stare at me.
“Oh so now I have your attention?”
She tilted her head. I could swear she knew what I was saying. I’d been talking to her a lot since I got back the night before.
The damn cat might just be keeping me from losing m
y mind.
I scraped half a can into her bowl and stepped back, watching her eat.
Such a funny little thing. Cute. Even with her broken tail. It sort of bent in the middle from the accident.
I smiled. If she hadn’t already been named, I would have called her Twisted.
My phone rang and I scooped it up, hoping it might be her. Nadine. The detective hadn’t found anything yet. I was starting to get frantic.
“James?”
“Hi Mom.”
I listened to her talk about getting ready to move with one ear. I couldn’t stop worrying about my girl. Where she was. What she was doing.
If she was safe.
“Wait- what did you say?”
“I said that sweet girl Deanie’s back. She’s grown into such a beautiful woman.”
“Deanie is there? Since when? Mom, why didn’t you tell me?”
“What do you mean?”
“I told you I was seeing her. She disappeared on me.”
“Nadine is Deanie? Oh son, I didn’t think…”
“Can you keep her there? Get her to your house for dinner?”
“I suppose so. You know, I was actually glad when she ran away. After the way her stepfather was looking at her.”
My blood ran cold.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, let’s just say that it’s not the way a man should look at a young girl. I was afraid for her.”
I felt sick. Everything fell into place. Nadine’s virginity at her age. Her prickly nature. Her disdain for men.
How scared she’d been the first time I’d held her.
“That’s why I never said anything when I found her sleeping under our porch.”
“What?”
“Right around the age she started to sprout. She was always hiding under there. Where the honeysuckle grows.”
Of course. She was just like the damn cat. A survivor. She must have felt safe under there. That’s why she called the cat that silly name. I felt like an idiot. I felt helpless. I felt so angry I was ready to punch someone.
She’d hid under our porch. Like a stray. Now she was on the run. Still alone.
Well fuck that. I was going to keep her safe. From now fucking on.
I picked up the phone again. First thing I did was book a ticket to Chicago, leaving in two hours. Then I called my rep.
“Tell them I’m in. But they need to find me a place that takes cats. And help get my girlfriend into FSU for second semester, transfer her credits, everything.”
“You got it Fitz.”
I put out a a big bowl of water and food for the cat and packed quickly. I was feeling better than I’d felt since she’d taken off. At last, I was getting what I wanted.
What I needed.
I was going to get my woman.
Nadine
My back hurt. My head hurt. My feet hurt. I was pretty sure I was getting calluses.
Real attractive Nadine.
I’d been out all day pounding the pavement, looking for jobs. I hadn’t heard back from even one of the out of town gigs I’d applied to. So far, the only interest I’d gotten was from a greasy spoon diner. I’d also filled out an application at a local dive bar.
I doubted the pay would be enough to get out of here, let alone enough for school.
How had everything gotten so fucked up?
Not things had been all that great to begin with.
I reached into my bag, fishing for my house keys.
“Nadine.”
I looked up. My stomach dropped to the ground. I felt my heart begin to thud heavily in my chest.
James was standing in the middle of the sidewalk.
I was so happy to see him it hurt. And then I saw the look on his face. He was mad.
Really, really mad.
So I did the only sensible thing I could think of. I turned and ran.
He caught me easily, spinning me to face him.
“Oh no you don’t.”
We stared at each other for a minute, neither of us speaking. Then his mouth crashed down on mine. I threw myself against him, feeling like I couldn’t get enough of him.
I could never get enough.
Our tongues swirled. I could feel how much he wanted me. He had missed me after all. I could also tell I was about to get a tongue lashing.
And not the fun kind.
“God damn it, Nadine!”
Here it comes.
“Can we not do this on the street?”
“Fine. But it’s not like the neighbors aren’t used to it.”
He had a point there.
James gestured to his mother’s porch. Slowly I climbed the steps and sat down. He sat down next to me. For a minute he didn’t look at me. I wondered if he hated me.
I wouldn’t blame him if he did.
Even though he still wanted me.
Finally he spoke.
“You should have told me you were alright.”
“I wanted to.”
“Then why didn’t you?”
I shook my head. He stared at me. He figured it out on his own.
“Coach. Right?”
I nodded, wrapping my arms around myself.
“He told me that if I cared about your future I should just go away. I was dragging you down.”
He cursed and stood up.
“That’s bullshit Nadine and you know it. That’s the cowards way out.”
“Maybe. But I was dragging you down. You could have lost your whole career.”
“That’s not your responsibility. It’s mine.”
He grinned, flexing his hand.
“I shouldn’t have hit those scum bags so hard.”
He leaned down, bracing his arms on either side of me.
“But I wanted to hit them a lot harder.”
“James…”
“They touched something that was mine.”
I stared at him, wondering what he was getting at. I knew he was going to punish me for leaving. I just wasn’t sure how. But right now he just seemed relieved.
And determined.
“You belong to me Nadine.”
I shook my head, trying to get away from him. He didn’t let me. He held me while I stared at his chest. I couldn’t even look at him.
“I’m damaged goods Fitz.”
“No, you’re not Deanie. Don’t say that.”
“I am!”
I stared at him, trying to make him see.
“You should just get on with it. You don’t want me anyway. Except like that.”
“The hell I don’t!”
He kissed me and I forced myself to hold still. Not to respond. He stopped, pushing me away with a curse.
“Your stepdad did this to you? Made you so scared?”
I looked up at him. How did he know? It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered anymore. I just wanted the pain to stop.
“No!”
“Don’t lie to me Deanie!”
“He didn’t do shit! But he tried. That’s why I left.”
“Jesus Deanie, why didn’t you tell me?”
I shrugged, my shoulders hunched protectively. He grabbed me, holding me against his chest. I felt so safe. But I knew that it wouldn’t last.
“What do you want from me James? Just tell me. I will give it to you. And then you can get on with your life.”
“I want a life with you.”
I just shook my head. I was tired of fighting. He grabbed my shoulders, shaking me lightly.
“What about you? What about your life?”
I lifted my chin, staring at him proudly.
“I’ll figure something out. I always do.”
“That’s not good enough for my girl.”
“Just tell me what you want. I’m tired. I want to go to bed.”
He laughed, a low rumble in his chest.
“You are about to get your wish.”
He grabbed my arm and pulled me into the street. A car was waiting. It was high class. Not normal fo
r the neighborhood. I should have spotted it. I could have run.
“What?”
“I’m taking you to bed.”
Chapter Twenty One
James
I sat in the chair by the window, waiting. The shower water was still going. She’d been in there for a while.
I smirked.
If she thought she was going to avoid paying the piper, she had another thing coming.
I had waited long enough.
I could wait a little bit longer.
Finally Nadine came out. She looked scrubbed clean, fresh and glowing. She ran a towel over her hair and smiled at me sheepishly. She looked a little nervous.
Good.
That was good.
She had reason to be. I stood up and walked over to her, smiling reassuringly.
“James…”
I tilted my head, waiting.
“I just wanted to say that… I’m sorry.”
I watched her squirm, not saying a thing.
“I felt awful. I was worried about you and-“
“I forgive you.”
I reached for her.
“Just never do it again.”
She exhaled a sigh of relief and nodded happily. I almost felt guilty about what I was about to do.
Almost.
“Hand me your belt please.”
She blinked at me, not understanding. She shrugged and pulled the belt loose, handing it to me. I walked around her, pulling the other robe out of the closet. I tugged the belt loose and threw the robe on a chair.
“I specifically asked for a room with a sturdy bed frame. I called three hotels before I found one.”
She was staring at me, clutching her robe shut. Her eyes were wide. She was starting to get the picture.
“Here’s how this is going to go.”
She swallowed. I stared at her throat. I thought about biting it.
I wanted to mark her with love bites all over her body.
I wanted to make her know in her skin that she was mine.
Fuck that, I wanted her to know in her bones.
“I’m going to tie you up. You are going to lay still while I do it. And then I’m going to do whatever I want to you.”
She was breathing heavily. I smiled.
“And then we are going to talk.”
“Talk?”