This was what I wanted. This was what I thought about when we were not together.
His touch, his kiss.
His taste.
I was vaguely aware of the pizza box falling to the floor, its contents spilling out onto the rug that could only be described as baby poo green. Dane looked me and smiled. I shrugged, and positioned myself under him on the bed. Pulling him down on top of me, we kissed, his mouth exploring mine with a sense of urgency. I lifted my singlet over my head; he did the same, until our bare bodies pressed against each other.
“God sexy, I’ve missed you,” He mumbled, fumbling his way out of his jeans.
“Missed me, we were together yesterday,” I laughed softly, as his hands trailed over my bare back. Yesterday felt like years ago.
“I thought maybe I’d ruined it, Lil. Kicking you out like I did,” He rolled off me, sighing as he rain his hands through his tangled hair, “I couldn’t go through that again, Lil.” He reached for my hand, his thumb rubbing over my knuckles.
“Dane, it’s okay. I get it. Really. And your reaction was completely understandable,” I assured him. The doubt in his eyes faded slightly, as my words made some kind of impact. I rolled over, snuggling in against him, his arms wrapping around me. This was my new favorite position.
“What do we do now, Lil?” Dane sounded stressed. He was scared; I could hear that in his voice.
“I don’t know. We can go to the police and tell them my dead sister told me in a dream the man convicted of your sister’s murder didn’t in fact murder her, but sold her to a sex ring,” I felt Dane’s arms tighten, “It sounds a little far-fetched,” I added.
“Okay, well we will head home tomorrow, and who knows, maybe we will have some new information by then,” He sounded hopeful. I turned to face him, shocked. Did this mean he was starting to believe me? “Don’t look at me like that Lil. I don’t know what I’m thinking; I just know that you’re the best lead we have right now.”
I kissed him, suddenly needing his mouth on mine. Having him believe in me – that I wasn’t crazy – meant the world to me. I could handle everyone else thinking I was a nut, but there was something different about Dane. I cared about how he saw me. That was something I hadn’t felt in a long time. We continued to kiss, not going any further than that, enjoying each other’s touch.
As we lay together in the single bed, I stroked his back gently until he finally fell asleep. He rolled over slightly, snuggling in close to me. I took in his body, the freckle that sat just above his left nipple, the small scar that ran across his collarbone. I ran my fingers over his chest, as if seeing him for the first time. I almost felt as if I was invading his privacy, looking at him like this. I ran my fingers over a long, jagged scar that ran down his right side. At about five inches, it was a decent size. What was that from? I remembered Kella saying something about the boxing team. He must have taken a decent hit to cause that.
I lay back, watching his chest rise and fall. Reaching down for the bedspread and blanket, I pulled them up over us. It was after midnight, and the chill was setting in the air. I could make out the frost beginning to set on the sill of the window. Yawning, I closed my eyes.
Chapter Sixteen
“Well you definitely have good taste,” Abby said, surveying the sleeping Dane that lay next to me. I rolled my eyes, and smiled.
“I’ve always had good taste,” I retorted. She was right about one thing, Dane was a great choice. “So, we saw Cole, the cellmate.”
Abby nodded. Of course, she already knew. I wasn’t sure how the whole being dead and knowing everything thing worked, and the one time I’d asked, she’d skirted around the subject.
“What now?” I asked, completely at a loss, “The police won’t help. Thank god Dane believes me. Or at least doesn’t not believe me.” That seemed a better way to describe it.
“Lil, you need to get him there. He needs to go there.”
“Where?” I shouted, frustrated she wasn’t giving me straight answers, “You keep saying I need to get him there, but then you won’t say where. This country is a huge place, Abby.”
“Okay, okay,” Abby nodded impatiently, “There is a small neighborhood in Brooklyn, called Brownsville. Go there, and find a woman named Eva Feluca. She may not want to help you, but she can lead you to Steffy.”
“Why can’t you just give me a straight answer?” I cried, “Seriously I feel like you have me running in circles.”
“I’m sorry Lil. I’ve told you more than I should have already,” Abby’s eyes were sad. She was frustrated too, “I love you Lil. Be careful.”
My eyes flew open. Dane lay next to me, still asleep. The clock read 7:34. I sighed, relieved I’d managed a few hours of sleep. Next to me, Dane stirred, mumbling something in his sleep. I nudged his shoulder.
“Dane,” I whispered, rocking him softly, “Wake up.” He opened an eye, stretching out his body. I tried not to look at his bare chest as it curved toward me; unsuccessfully, because all I did was stare.
“What time is it?” He mumbled, not yet out of his slumber.
“Nearly eight. Come on. We have to get going,” I tried again, this time he opened both eyes, and sat up, rubbing his head.
“What’s wrong?” He asked, finally hearing the urgency in my voice. He stood up, throwing his shirt on while he waited for me to talk. I took out my little bottle of mouthwash and swished a capful around in my mouth, before spitting it down the bathroom faucet. I held the bottle out to Dane. He cocked his head.
“Is that a hint?” He grinned.
“Well, I’m sure as hell not going to kiss you with your morning breath,” I said, spraying under my arms with deodorant. I offered him that too. He took the can dubiously, reading the label.
“‘Naturally feminine’,” He made a face, “Just what I’ve always wanted.” I giggled as he sprayed it under his arms, knowing his choices were this, or nothing.
“Ohh, don’t you smell nice,” I teased, pulling him closer to me. He smiled.
“Did you see, uh, Abby?” He asked, changing the subject. The lightness in the air evaporated, as I suddenly felt stressed, and frustrated.
“Yes. She can’t, for whatever fucking reason, give me any more specific information other than we need to go New York,” I followed Dane out to the car. He threw me the keys and ran into the office to drop off the room key. When he emerged moments later, he jumped in the passenger side of the running car.
“So. what now then?” I asked, shooting him a look out of the corner of my eye.
“If I need to go to New York, then that’s what I need to do,” He shrugged. My mouth dropped open in shock. He said it with such ease; it was as though he was choosing an item from a menu. “What?” He asked, confused by my reaction.
“Nothing, it’s just you seem really easy about it…” I felt silly, like I overreacted. Of course he was going to go to New York. Like there was any other option.
“Well no,” He said, rolling his eyes, “I’ll need to organize a few things, like, a flight, a hotel, and get together some money,” He added, “What choice do I have, Lil? You’re telling me not to go? You’re the one who’s…” His voice trailed off as he shot me a look. He didn’t finish his sentence, but he didn’t need to. I’m the one who dredged all this up in the first place.
One minute I’m annoyed because he didn’t believe me, and the next I’m nervous because he believes me? Make up your mind, Lily.
“I’m sorry Dane, I’m just nervous. Let me come with you,” It made sense, at least to me. I was the only one getting any information right now.
“What about school?” Dane asked. I glared at him. He thought school was important to me right now? Even if I didn’t go, I’d spend all my time stressing about him anyway. “Okay, come with me,” He mumbled, as though he knew it was pointless trying to argue with me.
“So, run that all past me again?” Kella stared at me as she sat cross legged on my bed.
“Yes I know, it’s
crazy, and I know you think I should see someone,” I sighed, curling up to my pillows, “But on the off chance it is true, can you understand why I need to go with him?” I needed Kella onside, because the last thing I wanted was for her to call my mom, which would happen if she got too worried about me.
“I’m just worried about you, Lil,” Kella said, pushing her hair back out of her eyes.
“And what Cole said?” I challenged, convinced that was not a coincidence.
“Lil! He’s a criminal, who probably lies all the time,” Kella pointed out, frustrated.
“You didn’t see him. He was scared. Look, I know you don’t believe this thing with Abby, but I’m telling you, this is real. Steffy is still alive and in trouble. If you believe that it’s even the tiniest bit possible that this is true, then you owe it to yourself to help me,” I searched her eyes for some sign of relent, anything that suggested some belief.
“What do you need from me?” She finally asked.
“All I need, Kel, is your support. Dane wants to fly to New York tomorrow, and I’d like to go with him. What?” I asked, as Kella’s eyes lit up. She held her hand up to silence me, and grabbed her phone. I only needed one guess to who she was calling.
“Hey baby?” Kella purred. I rolled my eyes. Was this really the time for a booty call? “When did you say you were heading to New York? Can you make it a day earlier?”
Now I was listening. Fraser had a private plane? Why didn’t that surprise me? That would make things much easier, and also meant I could go without having to ask mom for money. I impatiently waited for Kella to get off the phone.
“Well?” I demanded.
“Can you be ready in two hours?” Kella grinned.
“Wow!” I cried, throwing my arms around her, “thank you!” She laughed as I squeezed her tightly, lifting her up off the ground.
“Lil, I do support you. Even when I don’t think you’re making the right decision, I’m always here for you,” She said softly. It meant a lot to hear her say that.
“Well let’s get ready,” She said, pushing me out of the living room. I spun around.
“You’re coming too?” I asked, surprised.
“You think I’d miss a chance to spend a few nights in New York with Fraser?” She rolled her eyes, as if I didn’t know her at all. I laughed. She was right, this was true Kella fashion. “Not to mention he may be meeting his parents at the Gala he is going there for,” She smiled, raising her eyebrows. She had that look in her eyes.
“Wow, are you sure you’re ready for that?” I said, not even bothering to try and hide my shock. Kella knew as well as I did she wasn’t likely to be the girl Fraser’s parents had in mind for their son.
“No,” She admitted, “We’re actually getting pretty serious though, and I’d rather get it out of the way, give them time to tolerate me in case things progress.”
Progress? I’d never heard Kella even hint of marriage before. Wow. This must be serious.
“I’m happy for you. He seems like a really good guy,” I smiled. That was true, I thought Fraser was great, and he was perfect for Kella.
“He is,” Kella’s face changed completely to one of a girl who was smitten. “I love him, Lil,” She admitted, “He told me he loved me last week.” She blushed.
“Did you say it back?” I asked, giggling. Kella in love. Even during the three years she was with Mel, their relationship was never a touchy smoochy kind of one.
This was big.
“I think my exact words were ‘oh Frase, you are amazing’,” She reddened as I laughed.
“Well that’s not so bad,” I offered, trying to make her feel better, “At least you didn’t say ‘thanks’, or ‘that’s nice’,” I giggled. Kella shot me a look, making me giggle even more.
“It’s not funny, Lil. I do love him. I’ve just never said anything like that to anyone before. I know I love him, but the words wouldn’t come out,” She said sadly.
“Give it time. You’ll say it eventually. He’d be stupid if he didn’t realize you feel the same way.” Kella nodded, her face still uncertain. “Anyway, I better go and speak to Dane.”
Kella’s eyes lit up, “Speaking of love…” She teased. Now it was my turn to blush. “Ha!” She cried, “I knew you two were getting serious.”
I sank back down into the sofa, deciding five more minutes wouldn’t hurt. I grabbed my phone, and texted Dane. I’d been planning on landing on his doorstep to tell him, but I felt like I needed this time with Kella.
Come over ASAP. I have news. Love you.
I gasped as I realized what I’d said. Damn Kella! She had gotten thoughts of love in my head, and now I’d done the most embarrassing thing ever and professed my love to Dane!
“What?” Kella said, her expression concerned, “What is it Lil?” I threw my phone at her, unable to even get the words out. This was so embarrassing. I heard Kella’s laughter fill the room.
“Oh Lil, you didn’t…” She giggled, tossing my phone back at me, “You texted him you love him?” She wiped tears from her eyes as I scowled at her. It wasn’t that funny. “Can I be here when he comes over? That’s one awkward conversation I don’t want to miss,” She giggled.
“No,” I growled, “Kel what am I going to do?” I panicked.
My level of anxiety had just jumped a thousand percent. I felt sick. Not because I didn’t love him. I did. What if he didn’t feel the same? I’d been waiting for him to say it to me, preferably while he was half naked and wrapped in my arms.
“It will be fine,” Kella promised, “Look at Frase and me; we’re fine, so you guys will be too.” She hesitated, “So, did you mean it? Do you love him?”
I groaned, “Yes,” I admitted. Even admitting it to myself, I wanted to cringe. I hadn’t felt this way about anyone before, and Kella’s doe eyed smile wasn’t helping things. “Stop grinning at me,” I grumbled. She put her hands up in defense when the doorbell rang.
“Go,” I ordered as her face lit up. Rolling her eyes, she obeyed, but not before shooting me a glare.
“You can’t stop me from listening against the wall in my room,” She grumbled. I hid a smile. At least she was honest about it. Standing up I headed to the door, feeling as though I could throw up at any moment. I took a deep breath and opened the door.
“Hey,” Dane grinned.
Just the sight of him made my heart ache. He wore his usual jeans, though this pair were more fitted and displayed his amazing ass as though it were a showcase piece in a museum. I tore my eyes away from his butt, meeting his amused eyes. His eyebrows were raised.
“Are you okay, Lil?” He teased. I groaned. He was loving this. He loved knowing the effect he had on me. And the worst thing was he really had no idea how every little thing about him sent me into a frenzy. That crazy curl of hair that no matter how often was swept away from his eyes still kept falling down. Or the way the left side of his mouth lifted slightly higher than the right when he smiled. Or how my insides screamed for more whenever he touched me. Or-
“Are you going to let me in, sexy, or are you planning on staring at me all night?” He smiled at me, his eyes dancing. I blushed as I moved aside, gasping softly as he brushed against me.
“You seem very strange tonight, Lil,” He commented. Right, like he had no idea why. Determined to change the subject, I told him about Fraser’s offer.
“So if you can be ready in say an hour, then come back here and we will go,” Dane stared at me in shock.
“Are you serious, Lil? This is huge. Thank you so much,” He pulled me into his arms.
“Don’t thank me, thank Kel and Fraser.”
“I’m thanking you because you’re amazing,” He murmured, “And Kella because she hooked the only millionaire in this town who is actually tolerable. Is she here?” He asked, looking around for signs of Kella’s presence.
“Hi Dane!” Kella’s voice thundered through the wall. I covered my eyes with my hand. She hadn’t been joking about eavesdroppi
ng.
“Thanks Kella! Tell Fraser thanks too!” He hollered. Turning to me, he smiled, “I’ll see you soon,” He said, leaning in to kiss me.
I walked him to the door, shutting it once he’d reached his car. Standing in front of the closed door, I leaned against it. Why hadn’t he said it back?
Kella appeared in front of me, her timing completely coincidental I’m sure. She smiled at me sympathetically. Great, so she’d heard everything. Or more to the point, what was not said.
“It doesn’t mean anything. Look at Frase and me. I haven’t said it, but I do love him,” Kella interjected. She had a point. Not that it stopped the negative thoughts running through my head.
Since I had no idea how long this was going to take, I packed enough for a week, including a dress just in case we ended up going out somewhere. As I lugged my suitcase out near the front door, I could hear laughter coming from the living room.
“What, are you moving there?” Kella snickered. I glanced over. She and Fraser were sitting on the sofa.
“Hey Fraser,” I said, walking over to them, purposely ignoring Kella’s remark, “Thanks so much for this,” I added.
“No bother, seriously. I was heading there anyway. This way my girl comes with me too,” He kissed Kella’s cheek. She glared at me as I giggled.
“Yes, well I know this means a lot to Dane too,” I added, wondering how much he knew. Had Kella filled him in at all? Fraser’s expression went from happy to somber. Well, I guess that answered that.
“If I can help at all, Lily. Just say the word,” He added.
“You’re doing heaps already, Fraser. I can’t thank you enough,” Fraser laughed.
“I’m letting you join me on a flight to a place I was already going to. That’s nothing. I mean it,” He said. I caught the tone in his voice. “I have a lot of connections. If you need anything, let me know. I can’t imagine what Dane’s going through, but if I can help, that would be great,” He held my gaze and smiled.
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