“I am honoured. I would never laugh,” I assured her.
She smiled and turned over the first picture. It was the garden, probably sketched from the very place we sat. Some effort had clearly been made to make the lines crisp and clear, but it seemed to me that the vague sketch marks beneath were more honest.
“Very nice,” I said.
She flipped to the next one, a close-up of one of the fish in the pond, blurry, as if looking through a rippled surface. Then there was a tree, smudged, making it appear almost in motion. The last drawing she showed me was a black shadow on dotted waves. There was a half moon in the sky above.
I pointed to this shadow. “It’s a ship. Isn’t it?”
She nodded, pleased that I could tell. “This is what I saw through my spyglass on that day. Or, it’s how I remember it.”
“Even the moon?” I teased.
“Well, not the moon. I added that after moon-gazing that night.”
I sighed. “Ah, that is something I have not done in a while.”
“I love the moon.” She smiled. “I can’t see so well in the darkness, but it doesn’t hurt my eyes like the sun often does, and I don’t need the parasol.”
“I would love to see you in moonlight.”
The words had slipped out unbidden. The flush of her cheeks alerted me that I had spoken them aloud. But I would not retract them. They were the honest words of my heart, and she did not pull away. We had tea served in the garden and I stayed as long as I could, but as the dinner hour approached, I had to leave. We agreed to meet again the next day for a picnic. Her lingering gaze as I retreated that evening gave me no doubts as to the feelings of her heart.
I was to meet her at a spot near the garden. When I arrived, she was not there, and several minutes passed without her appearance. I was about to proceed to the house directly when I saw Akiko running toward me.
“Mr. Fukui! Mr. Fukui!” she called breathlessly. “Miss Yuki isn’t coming.”
“What are you saying? Not coming? Explain right now!”
Akiko bent over, resting her hands on her knees, gulping in air. I gave her three seconds to catch her breath before again demanding that she explain herself.
“Mr. Itoh discovered what she was planning, and he forbid her to leave the house.”
“What? Why?”
“Mr. Itoh wasn’t pleased about your trip to the port. He was especially displeased by the clothes.”
“Yes, yes.” I felt impatient. “I know that already. But are you saying that he is objecting to me now?”
“It seems that way...” Akiko lowered her head, looking ashamed. “Mr. Ueda is coming today. Mr. Itoh wants Miss Yuki to be there to meet him.”
Ah, my rival, I thought. I remembered my brother-in-law’s warning about Mr. Ueda potentially causing trouble. It seemed I did not need his help. If Mr. Itoh did not approve of me, that was trouble enough. It might even be enough to keep Miss Yuki and myself apart. Damn!
I paced back and forth, trying to determine my next move. Should I go to the house and demand an explanation? Or would that be too offensive and bar me from ever returning? Had we already offended him by arranging this picnic? I was beginning to feel defeated.
“Akiko, please give Miss Yuki a message for me.”
“Of course.”
“Tell her that I won’t call today. I will wait until tomorrow. I will go to the front door and meet her father directly. I am afraid we may have offended him by planning to meet this way.”
She nodded eagerly. “Yes, yes.”
“And if you can... Tell me what passes between Mr. Itoh and Mr. Ueda today. Observe Mr. Ueda’s attentions to Miss Yuki. You still think he wants to marry her, don’t you?”
“Oh, yes. Everyone talks about it.”
“Yes. Well, please listen carefully and tell me everything you hear. All right?”
“Yes.”
“But don’t put yourself in peril. If you think you will get in trouble...”
“I understand. It’s all right. I’ll go now.”
“Thank you, Akiko. I’m grateful to you.”
She returned to her mistress’ house and I to my sister’s. I did not confide in my sister or brother-in-law. Preferring to brood on my own. Nakamura had brought a letter home for me from my cousin. Atsushi reported that he had found a cheap place for the store and made many contacts with ship captains, as well as keeping in contact with friends from London. He was going to give it a serious try, and if I wanted a spot at his side, he would happily receive me. It was good news, to be sure, but I did not want to think about that right then. I ate little at dinner and retired early.
The next morning, I fought with myself. I had promised Miss Yuki that I would return. But what if that was the wrong thing to do? Would Mr. Itoh throw me out? Then again, if I didn’t return, would he perceive that as giving up? No. I made a promise. I would go. I squared my shoulders, put on my hat, and set out.
My initial welcome at the Itoh residence was not hostile, though I was kept waiting for some time after the maid showed me into the sitting room. I had finished the tea she brought me well before my host joined me. I was prepared for a reprimand after this treatment, but Mr. Itoh said nothing rude to me, instead inquiring after my brother-in-law and sister. I assured them they were both quite well. I even shared that I may have a niece or nephew on the way, as my sister had spilled to me recently.
Mr. Itoh chuckled. “Nakamura has said this to me more than once. But if your sister thinks so, then at last it may be true. I hope it is so.”
I thanked him and sipped my refill of tea that the maid had brought when Mr. Itoh entered. The two of us chatted about marriage and families, a topic I felt, and Mr. Itoh knew, I could not contribute well to. He seemed to sit on his cushion a little straighter with his nose in the air and he drank his tea and fairly lectured me. Marriage was honourable. A good marriage was the only way a girl could properly give thanks to her parents for all they’d sacrificed for her. My sister honoured my parents by marrying Nakamura. Nakamura is a good husband with an eye on the future, but his feet firmly planted so that his wife and children will never have to worry.
I wasn’t so sure about that last statement, but I wasn’t about to argue with him. I began to see what he was getting at - he did not think I was a good match for his daughter. Unlike Mr. Ueda, whose name had not come up, Nakamura being a convenient stand-in, I had no property, no house, no ‘feet firmly planted’. In all honesty, though I did not admit it aloud, if it were not for my feelings for Miss Yuki, I might have already left to join my cousin in Tokyo.
When Mr. Itoh stopped talking, I thought carefully on how to respond. The old man did not seem in any way impatient as he quietly sipped his own tea.
“When I get married,” I finally said. “I intend to put in my whole heart. I would never go into such an arrangement lightly. And I vow to always care for my family.”
“Every young man has these intentions,” was the careless response. At least, I found it so. He went on, “The young always run into things with their whole hearts. It’s the head that should be consulted. Tell me, if you were to marry today, what could you offer your bride? What assurance could you give her family?”
Finally I was chastised. I sipped my tea, deciding not to answer rather than get into a petty argument with a man I had hoped to impress and not make my enemy. When I finished my tea, I thanked him and departed. I was not surprised to find Akiko waiting for me by the road out of sight of the house.
She bowed. “Excuse me.”
“Yes? Do you have a message from Miss Yuki?”
She bowed again. “And to report what you had asked me to find out.”
“Ah, yes. Thank you. Please, tell me what you have to say.”
“Mr. Ueda has made his intention to marry
Miss Yuki known to Mr. Itoh. However, Mr. Itoh is also aware of Miss Yuki’s own feelings on the matter, and also how highly she regards you, Mr. Fukui.” She waited for me to respond. When I did not, she continued. “Miss Yuki has told Mr. Itoh that she does not want to marry Mr. Ueda. And she wants me to make sure you understand this.”
I digested this information, trying not to get too excited. I looked around the area where we stood. There was a copse of trees not far away to the west. I pointed them out to Akiko.
“Please! If you think you can sneak away, bring Miss Yuki to those trees tonight. I will wait all night, so come when it is safe. Can you do this?”
She bowed. “I will do my best.”
I returned her bow. “Thank you. Thank you so much. I must meet with her. You see, Mr. Itoh has spoken to me, as well.”
“I understand.”
“Go now. And be careful.”
“I will.”
She bowed again and ran off, not taking the road so as to avoid being seen.
When I returned home, I must have looked anxious for my sister became alarmed when she saw me, making me sit down and ordering the maid to bring a fan and a cool drink. I refused to tell her what was wrong, only saying that I had overexerted myself and eaten very little. In response, she also ordered rice and fish, refusing to leave me until I had eaten it all. I was dutiful until that point, when I insisted I needed rest and would retire to my room. The maid laid out my bed and I stayed there for the next few hours trying, but failing, to sleep. I kept remembering Miss Yuki’s pale face down-turned whenever Akiko had teased about Mr. Ueda’s intentions.
I snuck out of the house and arrived in the grove as the sun was setting. I thought I had never felt so anxious in my life. What was I doing? I kept asking myself. Wasn’t I being reckless, the opposite of what I had assured Mr. Ueda? And what would I say to Miss Yuki when she arrived? I had plenty of time to consider this. It was many hours before she appeared with Akiko leading her by the hand.
“Oh!” she said when she sighted me. “You have no hat!”
I was shocked. Here I had been worrying myself nearly sick all day and these were her first words to me? I saw Akiko giggle behind her hand.
“It’s night,” I answered. “I don’t need a hat.”
“Ah, that’s true.”
We stared at each other a moment before breaking into laughter. Miss Yuki asked Akiko to step away until she was called for, and the young maid obeyed. I strode to Miss Yuki’s side and took her hand.
“I am so happy that you came to meet me.”
“How could I not?” she admonished. “Did Akiko tell you Mr. Ueda has practically asked my father for permission to marry me?”
“She did. I spoke with your father today, and he all but told me I had no chance.”
“He said that?” She sounded alarmed.
“He lectured me about family, honour, and stability.”
Miss Yuki turned away. “How could he say such things? Nothing is certain in this new era! Nothing is like it was before! He wants to modernise the fields, bring the telegraph and the rail road, and earn money for himself, but he insists on sticking me into the same role my mother had.” She turned back to me, grasping both my hands tightly. “He told me I’m spoiled. He should have raised me to be a proper farmer’s daughter and made me work in the fields. But I could never work in the fields, and he knows that! The sun would burn my skin in minutes, and my eyes are too poor to see the fine green shoots.”
“You’re special...” I started. She interrupted me.
“Do you know what they called me when I was child? Ghost! My mother was so ashamed for me that she kept me sheltered inside. And he calls me spoiled?”
I wrapped my arms around her. I couldn’t imagine what her childhood had been. I had grown up on the seashore, not amongst the rice paddies, and lying in the sun by the water had always been a joy. I realised this was not something I could ever do with her. She would need a parasol. And if we had children with the same affliction? No. She was beautiful. Any children we would have would be beautiful. We would just be a family of parasols.
“Are you smiling?” she asked, peering up at my face. “Why? Do you think this is a joke?”
Tears pooled in her blue eyes. I pressed her cheek against my chest, holding her tightly in my arms, thinking how I could make her troubles go away. She felt doomed to a life of being coddled and surrounded by rice paddies. I could take her away from that. But at what cost to her? Would she go with me? Or would she be too afraid, even in her torment?
“Yuki!” I gripped her upper arms and pulled her away so that I could look into her eyes. Her white brows were knit together in confusion.
“What is it?” she asked.
“Leave with me.”
“What? But... Now...”
“It doesn’t have to be tonight. Only please don’t marry Mr. Ueda. Marry me. We can go to Tokyo where Atsushi is waiting with a job for me. You can ride a train and see the airships up close and all the dancing automatons you want.”
“Marry?” Her moist eyes held both surprise and hope. “You’re asking me to marry you? Really?”
“Really, truly.”
She began to cry again and threw her arms around me. “Yes! Of course! Let’s go to Tokyo together and be married.”
I kissed her hair, her cheek, her neck. She twined her fingers in the folds of my collar, pulling me close. I didn’t dare return with her to her house, but I was determined to spend that night with her. The branches of the trees acted as our shelter, and the thick grass beneath us would be our bed. She did not resist as I guided her to the ground. We held each other tightly as we kissed.
I ran my fingers under the folds of her robe at her neck. The fabric was dark, but her skin fairly glowed in the slants of moonlight filtered through the trees. Yuki arched her back, and I loosened the sash around her middle so as to easier part her robe. I kissed her neck where it met her shoulder. Her skin was soft and smelled of flowers. I placed a trail of kisses down her body, parting the layers of her clothing to make room for my lips.
Yuki gasped, murmured, and grasped the back of my head with her thin fingers.
“Are you all right?” I whispered.
“That tickles.”
“What? This?”
I buried my face in her belly, covering it in a quick succession of kisses. When her giggling became too loud, I shushed her, placing a finger over her lips. She took that finger into her mouth and sucked gently. It was my turn to gasp in surprise.
Eagerly, I pulled her robes apart, exposing her skin to the night. She shivered a little, though from the cool air or my touch, I don’t know. I ran my hands down her legs and pressed my lips against her inner thighs, delighting at her trembling.
I barely heard her whisper my name. I glanced up and thought I caught the words, “You’re mean.”
“What?” I softly asked. She repeated the words. “Mean? Are you saying you’re ready?”
She half hid her face in the folds of her robe, then looked down at me and nodded.
“Don’t be embarrassed,” I said. “You’re the most beautiful woman in the world right now.”
There was something magical about being with her at that moment, hidden by the trees, their spirits blessing our union. I moved gently with her, parting the layers of her robe to reveal her bare, ivory skin, savouring her softness, drinking in each beautiful sigh as she lay exposed and vulnerable beneath me. Ready, I opened my own robe. She gave herself to me fully, and I vowed to honour gift and always take care of her.
Spent, we lay entangled on the ground, our clothing a mess around us, half off our shoulders. Eventually, the birds began to chirp as they sensed morning’s approach. I heard a light shushing on the grass a dozen paces away, then Akiko’s whispered voice, “Miss Yuk
i! Mr. Fukui!”
“What is it?” I probably sounded grumpier than I’d intended. But I was comfortable. I didn’t want this moment to end.
“We should return,” she answered. “Unless you intend to leave right now?”
Yuki stirred then. “No, not right now. I want to talk to my father. I want to explain things. I should return to the house.”
I thought she was very honourable and brave for wishing to confront her father. It made me love her more. I didn’t know what I would have done in her place. My own father was long dead. I had no one to explain anything to.
“Should I go with you?” I asked.
“No. I think it’s better if you don’t come.”
I nodded. We rose, and Akiko helped her mistress redress. Before they departed, I kissed Yuki fiercely on the lips and made her promise to meet with me again that night to give me a full report. She said that she would and asked to wait for her no matter how long it took. I saw a firm resolve in her eyes. I knew that I would wait all night in the cold rain for her if I had to.
As I made my way back to my sister’s house, exhaustion crept up on me. I encountered only the maid as I quietly slipped in through the door. She looked startled, but said nothing to me, and I managed to make it to my room without disturbing my sister or brother-in-law. I undressed and crawled under the blankets with some relief, wondering what was happening at the Itoh residence. Was Mr. Itoh still asleep? Had anyone noticed Yuki and Akiko’s absence? Should I say anything to my sister and brother-in-law? Surely Nakamura, at least, would suspect something was amiss. That is, I mused, if my own absence during the night had been noted. I fell asleep with these thoughts swimming through my mind.
When I awoke, I perceived by the position of the sun that many hours had passed. No one had come to check on me. Nakamura was gone to his office, and I found my sister sewing on the porch that overlooked the road.
“You look terrible,” she promptly told me as I sat down next to her.
“Do I? I’m sorry. I’ve just woken up.”
“I know.” She appraised me sternly, then resumed sewing. “Is it that you are feeling ill, or are you being foolish?”
Valves & Vixens Page 6