by Jane West
“Are you sure?” Val stood tall, in control as his one arm held me tight.
“Yes! He just admitted to it in my ear.” I spat.
“Enough fighting for one day! You proved your worthiness.” He clasped his hand on my shoulder. “Go get cleaned up.” Val stood firm. He turned to Jeffery and Dom. They were quiet spectators with faces that had gone pale.
I felt awful that they witnessed my fight. I realized from this event today that even though we shared a house together, our worlds were very different. They were not accustomed to violence as I had become accustomed to. I think in the future, I should be more mindful.
Val addressed Dom and Jeffery. “Take her in and see to her wounds. I’ll be in shortly. I have some business first.” He grimaced.
I had a feeling he wasn’t too happy about Razz’s threat. True, we were in a full-blown brawl, but rape was rape. I suspected that this act was forbidden in his culture as in the human’s world. I didn’t care what Val decided to do with that disgusting jerk as long as I never had to lay eyes on him again, or else I might do all the innocent girls out there a favor and kill him myself—the racist bastard.
Gifts from the Dead
“Hold still!” Jeffery ordered. “Girlfriend, he worked your face good!” Jeffery gently swabbed my face with alcohol. I tried not to flinch, but that stuff burned like a mofo.
“Ouch! Can’t you be easy?” I leaned away grimacing.
“Gurrrl, you amaze me. You fight a man who is more than double your size, and you bitch-n over a little alcohol on a little old scratch? Chile, go on!”
I took in a deep breath. “I know, but he had it coming,” I said in my defense.
“Gurrrl, you could have waited until he dozed off and got ’em with the cast-iron skillet? That’s how my momma used to get my daddy. And let me tell you, it worked too! Daddy learned to sleep with one eye open and never stray again. He liked to roam a bit too much. Yo know, water always runs to the river, that’s what my momma would say.” Jeffery dabbed the cotton ball with more alcohol.
I stiffened from the burn, then I exhaled, feeling very human. “I’m sorry that Dom and you had to see...” I couldn’t get my sentence out from the sudden wincing.
“Dom and I were terrified for you. We had no idea how you were going to fight off that big old ugly mofo. We’re mad as hell at Val too. He should’ve never allowed that beast to touch you—Zop’s tradition or not! I don’t care. That fight should’ve never happened.” Jeffery seemed adamant about his standing. He seldom wavered in his opinions. Something I wished I could instill in myself.
“I never wanted him here.” I flinched again from the alcohol.
“Well...I think I’ve done as much as I can.” He tossed the bloody cotton ball in the trash can. “You’re lucky that these wounds are superficial. That animal could’ve killed you!”
“I know. It’s me and my big fat mouth.” I agreed.
“No, bitch! It’s your big fat temper!” Then Jeffery snorted a laugh. “But you sure did surprise Dom and me. You whooped that Zop’s a-s-s!” Jeffery emphasized as he high-fived me. “Lardy have mercy! What was that glowing stream that shot from your damn hands? Dom and I thought you were gonna set the place on fire! You is one bad angel!”
I shook my head, still stunned. “It just felt like a herd of wild mustangs needing to be set free. It was the most awe-inspiring thing and the most frightening experience I’ve ever known.” I shrugged my shoulders as I reached for my angel-fire necklace, still latched to my neck.
Dom entered my room with some hot, soothing tea and some chicken soup. Leave it to Dom to think of the perfect remedy. Tea, food and sleep were exactly what I needed, though I was too stoked. I suppose the effects of the fight wore heavily on me. Every time I thought about Razz’s threat, I got pissed-off all over again.
“This will make you feel better. Oui?” Dom placed the tray over my lap as I leaned back in bed. I didn’t know what the big fuss was about. I only had gotten a few scrapes and bruises. No broken bones, not even a busted nose. Then I remembered the beating of my life from Sam. If Aidan hadn’t reached me when he had, I would’ve died. I shivered over the memories, memories of Aidan and the feelings he stirred within me.
I smiled, hiding my spike of sadness. “Thanks, Dom, but I’m fine. Really! It’s the other guy you should worry about.” I winced.
“I don’t think so. I hope he suffers très!” (greatly) Dom spoke with apparent anger in his voice. “Your friend should’ve had Razz removed from our home long before now.”
Dealing with the ominous presence from the Family hadn’t been easy for the guys. A sudden stab of guilt struck. “I’m sorry, Dom. I didn’t mean to put you two in the middle of this toil.” I grimaced.
“No!” he said with vigilance. “It is not for you to apologize. You did nothing wrong. That creature had abhorrence for you the moment he set eyes on you. Constantly making anti-Semitic comments at you in your own home is unacceptable. You, no worry! End of discussion. Sleep now! Yes?” Dom smiled and patted me on my foot.
“I love you, guys, you know.” Getting a bit misty-eyed, I pushed through the biting pain and smiled.
***
Dom and Jeffery had left me to rest, but before I dozed off, I overheard a conversation outside my door. Jeffery had pulled Val to the side. It sounded like Jeffery was giving him the what-for talk.
“You should never have let that beast come to this house to begin with. He nearly killed Stevie. But I’m sure glad she showed him! That mofo deserved a good wallop-n!”
“I’m truly sorry for Razz’s behavior. I give you my word, I will handle him accordingly.”
“Good, cuz if y’all come up into my house again, threatening my girl, I’ll take a buckshot to your lovely ass!” Jeffery warned. “You need to protect her from trash like that. She’s a good person, and she deserves nothing but love and devotion. You understand me?” I pictured Jeffery waging his finger in Val’s face. I almost giggled.
I heard Val’s voice. “Yes sir! I will lay my life down for her. That’s how committed I am to your girl.”
“You make sure. Any-oh-how, I doubt your soldier will have the balls to come back here. My gurrrl neutered that Zop!” I heard Jeffery snapping his fingers.
Then Val gave way to a short laugh. “Yes, sir. Indeed! That little woman is as fiery as her hair.”
That was the last I heard before I drifted off to sleep.
***
When my eyes finally opened, the house was still. I glanced at my alarm clock, and it was two in the morning. The lights were out except for the night light I kept on my dresser. I glanced around, and my eyes landed on Val sitting in the accent chair next to my bed. I smiled to myself, listening to his gentle snores and the rise and fall of his chest as he slept, but from the way he was hanging out of the chair, he looked miserable. The chair didn’t accommodate his size very well. Most of his long body hung over the chair. I took a deep breath, watching. There was a sense of peace watching him sleep. Without thinking, I reached over and nudged him. His droopy eyes opened slowly, and he glanced over at me.
“Hey. Come lie down with me. I promise to behave.” I smiled even though it hurt like hell. My face took a good beating from Razz.
Val stretched and yawned, then he turned to look at me. Our eyes locked for what seemed like forever, then with a deep sigh, he whispered, “I think I can help your injuries.” He slid over to the bed and pulled me into his warm arms. I welcomed him as his citrus scent engulfed me. He leaned in without putting his weight on me, and he mumbled something in my ear as he brushed his hand gently over my body.
Immediately a sensation of warmth came over me, penetrating throughout my body. When he finished, a calm settled over me, and the aches and pain completely vanished. After he murmured sweet nothings in my ear, my eyelids became heavy, and soon I drifted off to sleep, nestled in his caressing arms. The last thing called to mind was a gentle kiss right before my thoughts slipped into a peacef
ul slumber. I remembered thinking how easy it was being with Val.
Mardea
Early that morning, I began to arouse from a dead sleep. As the haze of yesterday came to mind, my eyes slid over to Val. Obviously he’d been waiting for me to wake up. He sat relaxed in the chair by my window, sipping a fresh brew of coffee. With the sound of my sheets stirring, his eyes slid over to me. A cheery smile stretched across his face as he spoke. “Good morning, Rocky!”
“Good morning,” I mumbled as I rose up on my elbows, spying his coffee. “Is there any coffee for me?” I almost salivated for his cup.
“Yep, a potful.”
“Well, where is it?” I said, a bit muddled.
“Oh! You meant do I have a cup for you?” Val attempted to play innocent as his eyes rounded. I glared at him, puzzled.
“I guess. I have to go get my own?” I said, feeling a bit pestered.
“I suppose.” He sipped, acting as though he was disinterested.
I stared at him as a tinge of annoyance began to grow. I pondered a moment, trying to access his peculiar mood. Then I blurted it out. “What the hell has crawled up your ass this grand morning?” My eyes narrowed.
“Oh, you caught that, huh?” His eyes met mine as equally.
“I guess I did.” I bit back.
“Shall you go first, or shall I squeeze it out of you?” Val’s eyes hardened.
WTF! “Don’t I at least get a cup of coffee before you start in on me?”
“What possible reason would I have to start on you?” His mouth had set in stone.
I’d had it with this guessing game. “How about you just spit out what’s on your mind? I haven’t developed mind-reading, yet. Just fill me in on the blanks already!”
“Hmm...where shall I start?” His eyes nearly bore a hole through me. “What were you thinking, going to that bookstore?”
“Are we back on that subject?”
Val just stared at me in silence.
I rolled my eyes. “Because I could. It called to me. I don’t see what’s the big deal.”
Val snorted a laugh. “The necklace you’re wearing, it reeks of powerful magick. Black magick.”
“It does not!” I barked. I couldn’t fathom that this little stone camefrom a dark place. “The lady at the bookstore gave this to me.” I relented, nonchalant.
“Who gave the necklace to you?” his brow arched.
“I told you, the clerk!” I skirted around the truth. I wasn’t ready to reveal my source. Strange though, I felt like I’d cheated on Val with another man.
“That’s all? Just that ugly necklace?” Val watched me skeptically.
“No. There was a message for me.” I bit my bottom lip.
“Which was?”
“My daughter is alive.” I couldn’t stop myself from smiling.
“And this unknown person confirmed this?”
“Yes!” I threw my legs off the bed, sitting up, excited. “We can’t keep wasting time. We have to get into that hospital and find my records. I know—”
Val cut me off with a wave of his hand.
“Whoa! Hold on!” He leaned forward, bracing his elbows on his knees. “We are going to do this when I say so. I’m not going in there half-cocked with no backup. It all has to be well planned.”
“What’s there to plan? You can change your face. Go in there looking like one of the guards, ingress egress. It’s that simple.” I pointed out with irritation in my voice.
“It’s not that simple. What if the real person I’m mimicking is there? Also, I need to know where they keep their files. I doubt they keep their records in plain sight. They’re too crooked to be that stupid. Remember, I have to leave with the file without getting noticed.”
“When will you have the plan in order?” My heart felt like it was going to leap out of my chest.
“An anonymous allied is getting it for me. I’m meeting with my informant tonight.”
“Sweet! Where are we meeting this person?”
“Hell no!” Val bounced in his chair, his face red again. “We aren’t going. I’m doing this alone.”
“You can drop me off at the corner. I’ll stay out of sight.”
“Absolutely not! Do you want to scare off the only lead we have?”
“No, of course not.”
Val sat there with an odd expression, staring, as if he was trying to blueprint my mind. “I have to know who gave you that necklace. This time I want the whole truth, or you can find someone else to help you.”
I rolled my eyes, tugging the covers off me. “What’s the big deal? It’s a necklace.”
“Did the stone come from him?”
My eyes orbed. How the hell did he know? “That’s impossible! He’s dead.” I closed my eyes. I couldn’t hide anything from Val. He seemed to hold some truth serum over me. Not that he deserved to know about Aidan. He had no claim on me. Still I felt it was only fair to come clean.
“Okay! Yes,” I blurted out, betraying myself. “I think it might’ve come from Aidan. But I can only go by a stranger’s word.” I looked away, feeling the sting of guilt.
“I’m guessing that Mardea’s been keeping in touch with your ex-lover hasn‘t she?”
“Wait! How did you know her name?” I didn’t recall the storekeeper ever introducing herself.
Amusement danced in Val’s golden eyes. “I told you once, I have spies everywhere.”
I glared at him in shock. What was the point of hiding the details of my little discovery? “She didn’t know his name, but she gave me proof.” I squirmed, feeling a bit uneasy.
“And?” It was only a solitary word, but I could feel Val’s agitation loud and clear.
“Fireflies a nest of fireflies. It was our special hideaway in the forest.” I tossed a shameful shrug.
“I see.” His jaw twitched.
I sat there in silence. I didn’t understand why he seemed bothered.
“Why are you acting mad?” I asked straight out, even if I didn’t want to hear his reason.
“Oh! You think I’m jealous of him? A man who is dead.” His eyes sharpened. “Do you want to know why I wouldn’t make love to you?”
“Yes,” I whispered.
“I sat watching you sleep. I don’t know why, but I have this strong need to shield you.” His face took on a look of deep regret that puzzled me. “Anyway, I heard you cry in your sleep...and it was his name you called out.”
“I’m sorry. I don’t have control over my sleep talking.” I sat there, lost for words. How was this my fault?
“True, but it can be a window to what’s really in your heart.”
“When are you going to understand that Aidan is my past?”
“That’s the problem. As long as you still love this man, you will never be open to another. That’s the reason I couldn’t sleep with you.” Val paused. “If I can’t have your heart, then I don’t want any other part of you. Freckles, it’s all or nothing for me.” He looked dead serious.
I shook my head. He was starting to wear my nerves thin. “Bullshit!” I attacked. “It’s not my past that keeps us apart. In fact, Aidan has nothing to do with the reason we are not together. How can we be together when your kind despises me? Did you not say to me we couldn’t be together because I’m defective? Remember? I’m a dirty impure!” I threw myself off the bed and stood in front of him white fisted and half-naked with only a T-shirt barely covering my ass. I didn’t care. I wasn’t in the mood for shyness today. Val’s eyes combed over me, painfully slow. He stopped as our combative eyes met.
“We seem to have some obstacles to hurdle.” His mocking lip tugged at the corner of his mouth.
“Look! I can’t erase Aidan, and I wouldn’t want to if I had a choice. If it were not for him, I wouldn’t be who I am today. But...he’s my past, meaning, my feelings are buried along with his death. He’s gone! And you’re here. All I know is when I’m awake, it’s you I think about, not Aidan. It’s your arms I crave. It’s your kisses I long
for. It’s your touch I yearn to feel. I only want to share my bed with you—only you.” The pain behind my eyes was clear. “For now that’s all I have to give, Val.” I whispered his name. I’d been trying to avoid saying his name. I felt if I let his name escape my lips, I’d lose myself, forever. Regardless of my insecurities, it was time I stopped letting my past dictate my future. I had to face it. Spite our differences, I had feelings for Val.
Val eased out of the chair, making only one stride to reach me. He was so close I could feel his warm breath on my face. Gently with his thumb, Val began caressing my cheek. My breath stalled just when I thought he was going to kiss me, instead, he murmured. “Sorry, that’s not enough for me, Freckles. Like I said...it’s all or nothing.” And with that said, he pushed past me and left my room, shutting the door behind him.
In a fit of rage, I picked up his coffee cup off the nightstand and hurled it at the door. It shattered into a million pieces, splattering coffee all over the door. “Gold-Eyes, you’re an insufferable ass!” I screeched watching brown liquid slowly drip down the white door.
Blueprints to My Heart
Since that morning, I hadn’t heard or seen Val in over a week, not even as much as a phone call. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think he was avoiding me. I threw my phone down on the table, annoyed. I flopped down at the kitchen table, shoulders slumped. Giving way to a defeated sigh, I felt abandoned.
Though we’d parted on a bad note, I understood his frustration. In the same breath, I didn’t know what he expected from me. I couldn’t undo my past with Aidan any more than Val could change his heritage.
This yearning inside me felt worse than blisters on my heels. Regardless of my heart’s desire, I had to face the reality that whether or not Aidan was included in the equation, the fact remained that Val and I didn’t have a future together. I had to keep Val’s best interest at heart. I couldn’t stand back and watch him become ostracized by his race on my account. It would be too selfish for me to put him in that position.