The Damaged Heroes Collection [Box Set #1: The Damaged Heroes Collection] (BookStrand Publishing Mainstream)

by James, Sandy

  Lucas loves me.

  That would have to be enough for now.

  Chapter 20

  “I’m a what?” Joy asked.

  “A groom,” Lucas replied, handing her the plastic identification badge the race office receptionist had just pulled from the machine.

  The stark mugshot of her own face brought a cringe. The ID was still warm as she clipped it to the way-too-large maroon polo shirt she’d borrowed from Lucas before they went to the track.

  “A groom, huh? So what exactly does a groom do?”

  “Helps take care of the horses. Gets them ready for a race. Cools them down after. Don’t worry, I’ll teach you everything you need to know.” He opened the door leading out of the race office.

  Joy followed him back to his truck and crawled in the passenger side. Everything seemed a bit surreal. The life she’d always known had somehow been put into suspended animation. There was no Janos, no Tamas, no parents, and no Gypsy. She was running around a racetrack with Lucas and enjoying every minute of their time together.

  She felt ignorant of everything happening around her, but he was going to great trouble to act as her teacher, pointing out different buildings and introducing her to more people than she would ever be able to remember. She loved sharing his world, savoring his transformation into a friendly, happy man. Lucas was healing.

  He glanced over at her from across the truck, and Joy felt her cheeks flush as she allowed her thoughts to wander. Would he want to make love to her when they got home? After they returned from the mall, they’d quickly changed into work clothes so they could get to the track. There had been no time to talk, no time for anything except a few kisses and caresses that held a promise of more to follow.

  Right now, she desperately needed to feel his hands on her body again. Even after scolding herself that she wasn’t acting like a lady, or a respectable gypsy, Joy couldn’t push her overwhelming desire aside. Lucas had offered her the words she’d longed to hear, but what surprised her was how very much she needed him to show her how he felt as well. She needed him to make love to her without some precipitating event. Both times they had come together had been for something other than true affection, and tonight she was planning on things being different. Slow and deliberate. An expression of all the love she felt for him.

  Lucas gave her a crooked smile, and she wondered for a moment if he knew exactly what she was thinking. Her face burned with a blush.

  She still hadn’t wrapped her mind around the idea that she was carrying his child. Denial. Such an easy way to handle such an alarming revelation. Joy wouldn’t tell him. Not yet. Lucas had enough on his plate for the time being. Finding the right moment was important, and she would keep her eyes open should it miraculously arrive.

  Lucas eased the truck into a parking space next to the enormous building he’d called the paddock. “I thought you said I couldn’t go in there,” Joy said as she nodded toward the big barn.

  “You’re licensed now. You’re an official employee of Mitchell Racing.” He flipped her ID badge with his finger.

  “I sure hope your brother doesn’t expect much from his new help. I’m clueless. I don’t know one end of a horse from the other.”

  Lucas wrapped a reassuring arm around her shoulder. “The bridle goes on the end with eyes and ears. Stay away from the other end.”

  Joy followed Lucas past a small security shack where the guard waved at them when Lucas pointed to his ID as she parroted him with her own badge. She had to practically jog to keep up with him as he stalked up the aisle.

  Entirely lost in the swirl of activity around her, Joy felt horribly out of place. The barn was perpetual motion as people and equipment seemed to be everywhere at the same time. She’d never seen so many horses. Dozens. Maybe even a hundred. “All these horses are racing?” He nodded. “Tonight? There’s so many of them,” she said, hearing the breathless wonder in her own voice.

  “Thirteen races. At least eight horses in every race,” he said as he stopped in front of one of the stalls. “This is Cowabunga.” Lucas inclined his head toward an enormous brown horse. “Cowabunga, this is Joy.”

  Joy couldn’t stop giggling. “Cowabunga? His name is Cowabunga? You’re kidding, right?”

  “Nope. It’s actually Cowabunga Dude. But don’t blame me. I didn’t name him. Breeders do that,” Lucas replied as he opened the gate, walked into the stall, and grabbed the animal’s maroon halter. “We need to get him ready to warm up. Come on in. It’s time to teach you about harness racing.”

  Hypnotized by his movements, she watched in awe as Lucas equipped the horse. Poetry in motion. So many things that needed to be put on the gelding, so many things that had buckles and clips and Velcro. Her fingers itched to sketch him, and she scolded herself for not bringing a pad and pencil. “How did you learn what all this stuff is?”

  Lucas simply shrugged from where he crouched next to the horse’s front legs. “I just...did. I’ve been with horses since I was born. Learned how to slap equipment on by watching my mom and dad. Brian, too. After our parents died, Brian kept me busy in his barn. I guess when you learn it that early, it’s like walking and talking. Could you hand me that knee boot?” He pointed at a small black piece of equipment.

  Joy picked it up and passed it to Lucas. He smiled up at her with such warmth in his eyes that her heart leapt in response. God, how she loved this man. And how very lucky she was that he loved her in return.

  After Lucas had the horse ready, he strode down the aisle, telling her he needed to get something called a jog cart. Joy stood next to the stall, feeling terribly out of place and hoping the other people didn’t know that she didn’t belong. Her greatest fear was that she never would. She jumped in surprise when someone beside her started talking in a voice that was a little too loud and a little too scolding.

  “Who are you? And where’s Lucas?”

  Joy glanced over at the woman and frowned. There was only one person this could be. Tall, thin, blond. Way too much make-up. And big boobs, just as Sam and Katie had said. Lisa Clark.

  Funny. She should be jealous, but she wasn’t, and that confidence in Lucas was comforting. She did, however, have an urge to pull the woman’s hair out by those dark roots for the horrible way she had treated Lucas. Joy reined in her temper and settled for answering Lisa’s question. “He’ll be right back. He went for a jog cart. You must be Lisa.”

  Lisa’s perfectly plucked eyebrows knit as if she was considering Joy very carefully. And it was obvious that she came up inadequate in Lisa’s eyes. “I’m a little surprised Lucas told you about me,” Lisa finally said. “What did he say?”

  Joy shook her head, hoping to give the woman’s ego a slap. “Not a single word.”

  Looking down at Joy from her tall perch with pure disdain etched clearly on her pretty face, Lisa said, “Well, of course he wouldn’t tell you about me. He wouldn’t want you to be jealous.” Lisa twisted some of her long hair around a finger as if drawing attention to what she thought made her superior.

  Joy had to resist the urge to unleash several crude insults. Maybe if she said them in Hungarian...

  Lisa interrupted Joy’s thoughts. “I take it you’re his new girlfriend. I’d heard he was infatuated with some short, little...gypsy.”

  Joy had heard that particular word said with the same prejudiced tone of voice before. Too many times. Using all of her self-restraint to keep from grabbing a handful of those long, bleached locks and tugging until Lisa cried, Joy tried to hold her temper. “You heard right. So I guess that makes me that short, little...gypsy. I don’t suppose you’d like me to read your palm? Or tell your fortune?” She gave Lisa a wicked smile. “Maybe throw a curse your way? Or pick your pocket?”

  From the shocked expression on her face, Lisa took Joy’s taunting words seriously, which only reinforced the notion that not only was the woman cruel and superficial, she was an utter bigot. “Where did you say Lucas went?”

  “I’m right here
, Lisa. What do you want?” Lucas leaned the big bike that Joy now realized was a jog cart up against the stall’s wall. Her heart sang when he came to stand beside her and put an arm possessively around her shoulder.

  “I... I...just wanted to talk to you.” Lisa fixed her hard blue eyes on Joy. “Alone.”

  With a shake of his head, Lucas replied, “Anything you have to say to me, you can say in front of her.”

  Lisa’s mouth opened as if to argue, but she quickly restored her aplomb. “I’d heard you were back. I wanted to see if, I don’t know, you wanted to hook up again or something. Maybe go out and...” She ran her fingers across her collarbone in an obvious ploy to get Lucas to look at her chest. Joy narrowed her eyes. “We could just have some...fun.”

  If Joy hadn’t been there to hear it with her own ears, she never would have believed it. This stuck-up, shallow hussy was asking Lucas out while he was standing next to Joy as if she was nothing more than an inconvenience. About to open her mouth and unload her anger on the blonde, Joy stopped when Lucas tugged her a little closer. She turned to look up into his eyes. He gave her a small shake of his head. Cleary, he wanted her to remain quiet, so she obliged him.

  “Oh, my God!” Lisa suddenly exclaimed, her eyes wide in surprise. “What happened to your arm? Oh, Lucas. Your arm is ruined.”

  Joy was happy when Lucas pointedly ignored Lisa’s impolite question and even crasser statement, and she was proud he no longer felt the need to conceal his scars. He hadn’t even flinched at Lisa’s rudeness, but he had given an exaggerated, exasperated eye roll.

  “Lisa, I want you to meet Joy, the most beautiful lady I’ve ever laid eyes on.” He smiled down at Joy. “Jozsa, this is Lisa, the most superficial woman on the face of this planet. There’s nothing genuine about her, including that bleach-blond hair.”

  Lisa gaped at him open-mouthed for a few moments, and Joy smiled at a passing thought that Lisa looked like a baby bird waiting to be fed.

  “Well, I... I...never. Just see if I ever go out with you again, Lucas Mitchell,” Lisa huffed before turning on her heel and stalking her way back up the paddock’s aisle.

  Lucas bent down and kissed Joy’s forehead. “I’m sorry about that, Sweetheart. Lisa can be a bit...much. You know, seeing her now, I’ve no idea why I even dated her.”

  “It’s okay. I knew who she was. Sam and Katie told me about her.”

  Lucas closed his eyes and massaged the bridge of his nose with his fingertips. “Good God. I’d hate to hear their side of the stupid story.” After an exasperated sigh, he entered the stall and released the chains holding the horse in place. As Lucas was leading the gelding out, he instructed Joy on how to move that enormous jog cart she knew she would never be able to maneuver. Luckily, Brian came from the back of the paddock, grabbed the cart, tipped it level, and fastened the poles to the harness. She gave him a grateful smile in response.

  “How you doing, Joy?” Brian asked as he straightened the reins. “You like being a groom?”

  “Yeah, but I’m feeling a little lost.”

  “You’ll learn it in no time,” he reassured. “Especially with Lucas teaching you.”

  * * * *

  Lucas led the horse to the enormous exit near the track as Brian adjusted the reins and deftly slipped onto the seat of the moving cart. Joy tagged along. By the time Lucas let go of the bridle, Brian was driving the horse onto the track.

  Taking Joy’s hand in his, Lucas led her to a long, white fence. He leaned his elbows against the upper rail as she stood beside him to watch Brian and Cowabunga. “How many laps will he go?”

  “Two. Maybe three.” He lifted her hand to his lips and pressed a warm kiss to her knuckles. “I really am sorry about Lisa bothering you.”

  Joy simply shrugged her response.

  Lucas stared down at her, desperately wanting to know what she was thinking. What in the hell had possessed Lisa to talk to Joy? He didn’t figure jealousy was involved. But then he remembered Lisa’s constant need for attention as well as her need for high drama. Probably just hearing Lucas wasn’t sitting around mourning her loss had been enough to inspire her to try and discourage the competition.

  Competition. He snorted a laugh at the notion, and Joy turned her gaze to him as if trying to read his thoughts. Giving her a small smile, Lucas inclined his head toward Brian and Cowabunga as they passed by the paddock after their first lap. Her attention shifted back to the track.

  Lucas gave his head a small shake, wondering again what he’d seen in Lisa that made him even care she’d dumped him when he was in Iraq. Perhaps he just wanted to know someone back home was waiting for him. Perhaps he just liked showing her picture to the other guys. Perhaps that superficial Lucas didn’t exist anymore.

  There was no competition for his love. It was Joy’s. Purely, wholly, and passionately hers.

  He had every intention of showing her when they got home. This time would be different. No hurried, frenzied coming together. He would try to show her with actions what he’d finally found the courage to say to her with words. Pushing aside the uncomfortable thought that he might never have found that nerve if Seth hadn’t forced the issue, Lucas concentrated on the fact that Joy returned his love. She really loved him.

  “Brian’s back,” Joy said as she pointed toward the slowing horse and driver.

  “Do you want to lead him off the track?”

  “I wouldn’t know what to do,” she said with a nervous timbre to her voice. “You just show me tonight. I’ll try next time.”

  Lucas nodded before jogging over to grab Cowabunga’s bridle and lead him back to the paddock. Brian slipped off the jog cart, hung the reins on the harness, and hurried toward what Lucas assumed was his next drive.

  * * * *

  The evening had literally flown by, and Joy’s head was swimming with new information, most of which she feared she would forget before they went back to the track again. As Lucas eased the truck up the driveway, she tried to push all she had learned aside so she could think about what she hoped was to come.

  “I need to go check the horses,” Lucas said as she unbuckled his seatbelt. “Want to meet me upstairs?” He wiggled his handsome eyebrows at her and gave her an expectant, naughty smile.

  Joy could feel the heat spreading across her cheeks. She didn’t know why she should feel embarrassed, especially after what had already happened between them. But picturing Lisa in her mind, Joy was having a hard time not comparing herself to the leggy blonde. She was having an even harder time not thinking that her own looks came up wanting. “Yeah. I’ll meet you upstairs.” Releasing her seatbelt, Joy got out of the truck. Climbing the porch stairs, she turned to watch Lucas disappear into the barn.

  All the way to the bedroom, Joy wracked her brain, trying to think of how she could be enticing. She had no practice in the timeless art of seduction. There had been no need to learn to flirt or to try to make herself more attractive. It wasn’t as if the boys had paid her any mind anyway. She didn’t even own any make-up because her father had forbidden her wearing it when she was younger. By the time she was old enough to even consider disobeying him, she’d never felt the need to change who she was with powder, mascara, and blush. Now, when all she wanted to do was make Lucas think she was beautiful, she had no ammunition. And she felt sorely lacking in feminine curves and even more bereft of feminine wiles.

  Kicking off her shoes and socks and sliding off her jeans, Joy stood in the borrowed polo that was so large it almost reached her knees. Shuffling through the small box of clothes she’d packed, she found nothing that she thought was tempting or alluring. Most of the time she slept in big t-shirts or flannel nightgowns, and there wasn’t a single item in all she owned that would be remotely sexy. The sound of her cell phone’s text message chime drew her attention away from her frustration over her lack of seductive lingerie.

  Grabbing her jeans from the bed, she reached in the front pocket and fished out her phone. Flipping it open, she retrieve
d the message Lucas had sent.

  I love you.

  Her favorite three words. Dropping her jeans and fiddling with the phone, she forgot her lingerie problem for a moment as she struggled to send a message back to Lucas. Before she had even finished, she felt his arms embrace her from behind as his warm lips brushed against her neck.

  Dropping the phone into the box of clothes, Joy ran her fingers along the arms that encircled her as she gave in to all she felt in her heart. Tilting her head to give him a little better access, she enjoyed the racing of her heart that was inspired by his touch.

  When he’d reached the bedroom door, Lucas had stopped to stare. Seeing her standing there, legs bare in his over-sized shirt, Lucas’s body had reacted instantly. He was amazed he could form a coherent thought because the blood sure wasn’t pumping to his brain.

  No woman had ever appeared as sexy as Joy did at that moment. Trying valiantly to push aside the overwhelming desire to pick her up, toss her on the bed, and drive blindly into her warmth, Lucas had to take a couple of deep, steadying breaths before he could even go to her.

  Now that she was in his arms, his body was already begging him to hurry. But he wouldn’t. This time was different. This time wasn’t a release of grief or fear or anger. Or whatever Joy had been escaping. This time was an expression of their love for one another.

  Running his tongue around the delicate ridges of her ear, Lucas unbraided that gorgeous hair. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispered. “I want you, Jozsa.” He relished the shivers that ran through her body. “I didn’t... Should we... I didn’t get any condoms, Sweetheart.”

  Joy turned in his arms and pushed her hands around his neck. “It’s...it’s all right, Szivem. We don’t need to worry about it tonight.”

  Only a brief hesitation in her voice raised any concern, but as she brushed her lips across his, Lucas stopped thinking about anything except her.