“Good,” she said then glanced away from him to where Deputy Stone poured a circle of batter into the frying pan. “Are you making pancakes?” she asked hopefully.
The deputy looked up with a grin. “I sure am. Are you telling me you might want one?”
“I’m telling you I might want a few.”
He nodded. “It will only be a few minutes.”
“I can hardly wait,” she said. In fact, she wasn’t sure she could wait at all. A hole seemed to be developing in the middle of her stomach and she wasn’t at all sure that she’d ever be able to fill it. She pulled in another sip of Nathan’s wicked brew. Lowering her hand, she noticed a streak of dirt on her wrist. She rubbed it but it wouldn’t come off.
“There’s a small stream not far from here if you’d like to freshen up,” Nathan said.
She met his gaze for a long moment, barely daring to hope. “Do you have soap?”
Nathan produced a bar of the precious substance and showed her the way to the stream. He left her alone for a few minutes promising that he wouldn’t be far should she call for help. She scrubbed the dirt from her face and hands, then, since she’d lost her hairpins long ago, she combed through her hair the best she could before pulling it back into a long braid.
When she realized nothing more could be done at the present, she returned to the camp with Nathan and was delighted to find a large plate of pancakes waiting for her. She didn’t care that they boasted no preserves to sweeten their taste but took the plate and sat down on the log near the fire. She picked up a nearby fork. It was making its descent toward the pancakes when the deputy turned from the skillet. “Wait, Kate. That was for all of us.”
“Oh,” she breathed. Her fork wavered then came to rest beside the pancakes rather than on top of them. “Where are the other plates?’
He nodded toward them then turned back to the fire. Nathan picked up the plates then held them out toward her. She frowned in concentration as she carefully transferred pancakes onto the other plates so that each held the same amount. She quickly cut into the golden cakes on her plate, then placed a large triangle of it into her mouth.
She closed her eyes. Ecstasy. She swallowed. Unsatisfying ecstasy. She continued to eat but the more she ate the hungrier she became. The fork moved the pancakes to her mouth in what seemed to be increasingly unbearable slowness. She was only halfway through when Nathan noticed her desperation. “Kate, slow down. You’re going to choke yourself.”
She glanced up in questioning innocence.
He narrowed his gaze. “You heard me. Slow down.”
Kate gave him an unappreciative look. Yes, she’d heard him but she could not imagine obeying him.
“Nathan is right, Kate. If you eat too much too soon you won’t be able to keep anything down,” Deputy Stone chimed in.
“Is that right?” she asked after another swallow.
He nodded.
She smiled then cut a particularly big chunk off her pancake and crammed it into her mouth. Let’s see them try to make me slow down. Don’t they know I’ve been starving for days? I had nothing to eat but berries. Berries. Berries. I don’t think I’ll eat another berry again in my life.
She closed her eyes to concentrate on chewing and suddenly her plate was snatched from her hand. Her eyes flew open to connect with Nathan’s determined gaze. She narrowed her eyes. “What are you doing? Give me back my plate.”
“You’re going to make yourself sick.”
“I don’t care.”
“Well, I do.”
“Nathan Rutledge,” she warned as she watched him scrape the rest of her pancakes onto his plate. “What are you going to do with them?”
She gasped as he cut into them and began to eat them along with his own. “You’re eating my pancakes.”
“I’m keeping you from getting sick.”
“I’d rather you didn’t.”
He leaned forward. “Kate, listen to me. This is very important. Your body has existed on barely anything for days on end. You can’t shock it by putting in so much food at once. I am not saying that you can’t eat. You must eat. However, you should eat small meals throughout the day. You’ve had enough for now but I promise there will be more food later.”
She looked at him for a long moment then glanced to the deputy. At his supporting nod, she sighed. “Fine. Not that you’ve given me any choice.”
Nathan held his plate out toward her. “It’s yours if that’s what you want. I only wanted you to know the truth.”
She shook her head. “No. You are right. I’ll do as you say.”
He almost choked. “What did you say?”
She lifted her chin and met his gaze with an attempt at a threatening smile. “You heard me. Just don’t get used to it.”
The deputy laughed. “Well, I’m finished. Let’s get things packed up and take this young woman back home.”
It only took a few minutes to put out the fire and destroy the evidence of their campsite. She soon found herself staring up at Nathan as he waited for her to mount Delilah ahead of him. He looked completely disreputable with the shadowy three-day beard of his. He could almost pass for an outlaw if not for the warmth and caring in his eyes.
She glanced away. I can’t believe I’ve fallen in love with a man who has tangled with the law. Maybe he didn’t kill someone but he definitely hasn’t told me the whole story of what happened before he answered that advertisement.
She couldn’t allow herself to envision a future with a man with a questionable past. She owed it to herself and to her siblings to find out the truth. As soon as she got home she’d cull through the letters he’d sent to see if he’d offered some explanation that she’d missed. If not, she’d demand he explain himself. In the meantime, she didn’t even want to think about his problems until after she laid eyes on her brother and sister.
As she debated the wisdom of riding with him for several hours, with the weight of her unanswered questions and unresolved feelings bearing down on her, Delilah turned her head toward Kate and bared her teeth. Repeatedly. Kate caught her breath. “Did you see that?”
Nathan glanced at her questioningly.
Of course, not. Kate narrowed her eyes at Delilah. The horse would probably bolt the moment Kate put her weight in the stirrup. That clinched it. Kate shook her head and took a step back. “I think I’d rather ride with the deputy.”
He tilted his head to survey her carefully. “You think so? Well, Deputy Stone has plans of his own so it appears you’re stuck with me.”
She glanced to where the deputy was tying his bedroll to his saddle. “What does he have to do?”
“He’s going to scout around to make sure we don’t get any unwelcome visitors on the way back.”
“Oh,” she breathed in frustration. Praying Delilah wouldn’t bolt, she placed her muddy boot in the stirrup and swung onto the saddle. The horse must have remembered their truce, for though Kate braced herself, Delilah stood perfectly still. Nathan quickly settled into the saddle behind her.
She let out a breath of relief. The saddle was bigger than it appeared. There was plenty of room between her and Nathan. Then his arms came around to hold the reigns and she stilled as his chest brushed her back.
“There, that’s not so bad, is it?” he asked.
No, it’s worse, she thought but instead let out an affirming mumble. She didn’t want to be distracted by him or the emotions he so easily raised in her until she had time to sort out the past few days of her life.
They soon parted ways with the deputy. A few hours passed and the early morning sun inched its way across the sky until it shone directly overhead.
“Aren’t we going to stop for lunch?” she asked.
“We don’t need to.” Nathan presented her with a long stand of beef jerky. “Here. You can eat this as quickly as you like.”
Ignoring the sardonic grin in his voice, she took it from him and broke a piece off with her teeth. Chewing it, she glanced around at the l
andscape. It was pretty enough but still unfamiliar to her. “How far away are we now?”
“Probably a good four hours,” Nathan replied from behind her in the saddle.
“Better than a bad four hours, wouldn’t you say?”
“I would.”
She felt her spirits rising. They were getting closer. She glanced around but the deputy’s horse was nowhere in sight.
“Why don’t you try to rest, Kate?” Nathan asked, pulling her from her thoughts. “Just lean back and close your eyes.”
She narrowed her eyes. “Lean back and close my eyes, is that all?”
“I’ll have you know my intentions are nothing but honorable, Mrs. Rutledge, so you needn’t worry yourself.” He paused thoughtfully. “Unless, of course, it isn’t me you’re worried about.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” she breathed, although his comment hit a little to close to the truth.
His drawl was nothing if not casual. “Well, you were the one to send for a husband.”
She tensed. “You know very well that I did not send for a husband.”
He shrugged a broad shoulder. “No, but you didn’t exactly send me packing, did you? I reckon that must count for something.”
She was not in the mood for his games. She turned in the saddle so he could see that fact for himself. She lifted her chin and pinned him with her gaze. “Don’t tempt me.”
Their eyes caught and held. He read the fire in her eyes just fine but instead of backing down, he inclined his head questioningly. His brown eyes flashed with gold then trailed down to her mouth before meeting hers. His voice was low and serious. “I’d say that’s a fair warning.”
She caught her breath. Her gaze clung to his for a long moment before she turned to stare at the road before them. “Are you sure I can’t ride with the deputy?”
“I’m sure,” he said calmly. “Why don’t you eat your lunch?”
An hour and a half later, the horse’s gait had long since become a lulling rhythm. Her eyes were slowly but surely closing on her. Perhaps Nathan wouldn’t mind if she dozed for a bit. She grimaced. The man had obviously reverted back to his cowboy days. For the past hour he’d done nothing but hum, whistle or even occasionally sing. Strangely enough, all of the songs were slow or lullabies.
She knew he was trying to get her to relax. It was working. Her eyes closed and she felt her head nod forward. She snapped it back up. She decided she didn’t want to break her neck by falling from the horse.
Staring at the piece of road framed by Delilah’s dark ears, she slowly began to lean back. Small bursts of yellow against the green indicated the spattering of flowers growing beside the road. She blinked sleepily then looked back at the road.
She waited one last moment, then steeled herself by taking in a breath. Finally, her back met the warm solid strength of his chest. She waited a moment and was not disappointed. Nathan’s whistling came to a halt with one last down-spiraling note.
She bit her lip then waited for his whistling to start again. It took another moment but it started up again slowly. Kate firmly decided that she was wrong. Exasperating couldn’t fully describe Nathan Rutledge. A reluctant smile tilted her lips as she drifted to sleep.
Chapter Eighteen
Nathan leaned against the wagon as he waited outside the schoolhouse for the children. He hadn’t liked leaving Kate at the farm all by herself but she’d been desperate for some time alone to rid herself of the dirt she’d accumulated during her days in the wilderness. She and Deputy Stone both seemed convinced that Fulton would move on. Nathan wasn’t entirely sure. He had fooled himself into a false sense of security by believing that same thing before, and each time he’d been wrong. It wasn’t over. That much he knew.
He’d already been to see Doc and Ms. Lettie, both of whom had promised to drop by the farm as soon as Kate had a chance to rest. He’d also stopped by the Post Office and was surprised to find a letter from his family. He slipped it out of his pocket, wondering if he should give in to the temptation to read it or wait until he got back to the cabin.
He glanced at the schoolhouse door. Realizing the children would probably be another few minutes, he turned the letter over to break the seal. He began to read it and smiled in relief. Mariah had done as he’d asked and written to the sheriff in Noches for a full account of the incident Jeremiah had mentioned to them. She wrote that their parents were satisfied that he’d been found innocent of all charges.
Her letter was short so he moved to the next sheaf of paper included in the envelope. He glanced down at the signature and his heart began beating harder in his chest. This letter was from his pa.
Dear Nathan,
I’ve wanted to write you for a while now but I didn’t know how to contact you. I guess that was my own doing. It looks like you’ve gotten yourself into a heap of trouble since you left but you’ve also gotten yourself out of it. I’m proud of you for that.
I just wanted to let you know that I regret the way things have been between us. I know you must think I’ve been too hard on you and the truth is, I probably have been. The reason might surprise you. You may not have realized it but I’d been grooming you to take over the ranch those past few years before you left. I know it was supposed to go to your brother but you have a head for business that would have made the Rutledge holdings grow into an empire.
I never told you that. I didn’t think I needed to until you decided to leave. Everything I’d envisioned for the future came crashing down around me. Perhaps it was selfish of me but I didn’t want to share you with anyone else. I wanted you to stay and work with me. When you rejected my offer it felt like you were rejecting everything I’d worked to provide for you. Your last letter showed me that wasn’t the case.
Mariah tells me that you got yourself hitched to a girl who may not let you stay around. If she doesn’t, I want you to know that you’re welcome here. The position of foreman is available for your taking. Just send word ahead to let me know you’re coming.
Pa
Nathan stared at the sheaf of paper, his thoughts in an uproar. His pa not only wanted to reconcile but was also offering him a way out. Is this from You, God?
He’d wanted so much to believe that he could leave his broken dreams behind him to embark on a new future here in Peppin with Kate and her siblings. Now he was beginning to wonder if that was even possible. His past continued to haunt him through the specter of Fulton’s anger and need for revenge. As for his relationship with Kate, he wasn’t at all sure where he stood with her.
He could hardly hold her to the emotions that had almost led her to accept his kiss. She’d been out in the wilderness for days without adequate food, water or rest. Before he’d left with the wheat, he’d thought he was making progress. Her attempts to avoid him on the ride home had left him second-guessing that assumption.
The schoolhouse door flew open and he slipped the letter into his pocket. Children began to scurry out the door, with some hovering in the schoolyard while others immediately went their separate ways. It wasn’t long before Nathan spotted Sean in the bustle of children.
The boy’s eyes lit on his, then grew wide with cautious hope. He skirted the other children to hurry toward their wagon. Staring up with world-weary eyes too old for his age, Sean asked, “Did you find her?”
Nathan smiled. “She’s waiting for you at home.”
A smile grew across the boy’s face until it exploded into a grin. “I’ll get the others.”
Kate was tucking the last hairpin into her damp chignon when the creak of wheels drew her gaze to the window. She dashed down the stairs, then opened the door just as the wagon came to a stop in front of the house. Ellie jumped down. The little girl’s eyes found hers and began to fill with tears. Kate sank to her knees as Ellie traveled the few last steps into her arms.
“Ellie,” Kate consoled as the girl wept in her arms.
“I was so scared. We couldn’t find you.” Ellie’s shoulders gave a small shudder.
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“I know, but God protected me and He was with you even when I wasn’t. You know that, don’t you?”
She nodded, which set free a few large tears that spilled over her cheek and off her chin. Kate wiped the tears from her sister’s cheeks then smiled. “It’s all right.”
She waited until Ellie gave her a trembling smile in return before she released her and looked for her brother. Sean was just hopping down from the wagon. He smiled as his gaze caught hers, then he quickly walked toward her and pulled her into a strong hug. He stepped back to look at her in concern. “Are you sure you’re all right?”
She nodded.
He shook his head seriously. “If he hurt you—”
“He didn’t. I promise you.”
His eyes filled with desperation. “I should have been here. I should have protected you. Since Pa died, I’m the man of this family. It’s my responsibility to keep us safe.”
“No, Sean,” she said. “If you had been here he would have tried to hurt you. What happened wasn’t your fault. Don’t ever believe that.”
Kate glanced behind Sean to Lawson. He stood beside the wagon looking unsure of what to do. She realized he probably wasn’t used to such open familial displays of emotion but she didn’t let it stop her. She stepped forward and pulled him into a hug. It took him a stunned second to return it.
“I’m glad you’re back,” he said in her ear before he released her.
She smiled. “Thank you.”
Nathan cleared his throat from where he stood near the wagon bed. “Now that everyone is finally home, we have a lot of things to get inside the house. Everyone is responsible for their own things. This looks like Sean’s.”
He began tossing the children their belongings, making a game out of it, and easing the moment for all of them. When all of the children had disappeared into the house Kate shaded her eyes to look up at Nathan. “Is there anything I can carry?”
Unlawfully Wedded Bride (Love Inspired Historical) Page 18