by Leah Holt
It was like fate had showed me my savior.
I just didn't know it.
Fifteen
Ivy
The phone was in my hand. It felt cold and awkward.
I had wished for this one thing so many times; the freedom to speak.
It was right there, but I had no idea how to use it. Safety was our freedom for right now, knowing that we were under the radar and hidden away was keeping us together.
It was keeping us alive.
When Dante left this morning, he insisted that I keep the phone. He wanted me to be able to get help if I needed it. He didn't want something to happen, and know I wouldn't be able to reach out to someone if need be.
I didn't want to take it.
What if he needs it?
He was going out to the stalking grounds, I thought he needed it more. I was safe here, nobody knew where I was. Dante was going out into the city, showing his face off to the world and those who were waiting for him.
I wish he would've taken it.
But Dante wouldn't let me say no, and it didn't matter how much I protested. He was so stubborn in his control. He told me it didn't matter, that even if I refused to take it, he'd just leave it anyway.
I loved that he was concerned about the baby and me, but it drove me nuts when he wouldn't listen to reason. So I took it, but having the phone just didn't feel right, it still felt foreign. Even holding it made me feel like I was doing something wrong.
The last time I held a phone was in that parking lot when Dante told me to call my family. Even then it felt like a dream, like the phone didn't exist, and I was looking down on myself from outside my body.
Remo has fucked my mind.
I let the light flicker off as the ringing stopped. Holding it tight, I held the lifeline in my hand and I didn't know what to do with it.
Should I answer it no matter what?
What if he forgot what he said?
Pacing around the kitchen, I kept checking the time. Dante was hopefully going to talk to Sesto, then he was going to pick up some stuff for us at the store. He had me write down a list of all the things I would need now that I was pregnant.
I tried not to laugh at him, but he had this terrified look in his eyes like I might keel over if I didn't get prenatal vitamins.
So I made him a list of all sorts of crap, even though I didn't really have a damn clue what I would need. But it made him happy to have that piece of paper in his hand, like he was doing something for our baby.
It was so cute, I loved it.
There was no doubt in my mind that he was going to make a great dad. Already he was coddling our unborn child, afraid that I would break if I had to do anything for myself. He was so concerned about leaving me alone that I had to practically force him out.
Besides, we did need food since he had decided to throw out everything his brother had gotten for us. A girl's got to eat, especially now that I was eating for two.
The phone buzzed again, the same number coming through. Opening the screen, I let my thumb hover over the green button. But I still didn't answer.
I was afraid.
Who's on the other end?
Dante told me that if he needed to call me, he'd let it ring once, hang up, and call back again.
That wasn't him.
Snapping it closed, I let it go to voicemail. It was stupid how nerve-wracking it was just listening to the ring. It was such a common sound, a regular part of most people's lives.
For me, it was ear-slicing, wreaking havoc on my brain. If I answered and it wasn't him, what would I say?
Would I give away information that could get us killed?
Would someone be able to find us?
It was just too risky.
The phone rang a third time, and this time, I couldn't ignore it. It was the same number, what if it was Dante?
My hands were shaking as I opened it and hit the button. “Hello?”
There was no one there, but I could hear breathing. The speaker crackled, a long, deep breath filled my ear.
“Hello, Dante, is that you?”
I waited, listening and praying to hear his voice. Pushing the phone deeper into my ear, I tried to see if I could hear any background noise or sounds. Still nothing but dead air.
“Hello?” I asked again, my voice ragged and weak as I spoke.
“Hello, Love, you have no idea how good it is to hear your voice again.”
My heart stopped. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't feel my legs or my arms, everything just went numb.
“Come on now, don't be shy. I know you remember my voice, it hasn't been that long. Come on, Love, say something.”
The rage inside me bubbled up. The fear I felt when I heard Remo's voice manifested into something else. It turned black, purging my veins like thick tar.
“Fuck you.”
His laugh was deep, and I could picture him as he did it. His head falling back, eyes closing tight as his mouth gaped open. “Oh come on now, play nice.”
“I will never play nice, you can go fuck yourself, Remo.” My hands began to shake the more it set in that he was calling this number, seeking me out.
“Celia—”
Cutting him off, I snapped. “That's not my name.”
“That's where you're wrong. Are you forgetting that you're mine? I'll call you whatever the fuck I want. But forget that for now, we can discuss a name later.”
“There's not going to be a later, Remo. I'm done with you.”
His voice skipped, crackling as he spoke. “You will never be done with me, that's not a choice you have.”
“What do you want, Remo? Why are you calling?”
“Honestly, I wasn't sure if anyone was going to answer. I thought I was going to have to send someone to get you. It's a nice surprise that you picked up. But I think you're going to enjoy my surprise much more.”
Pulling in air through my nose, my fists balled up tight. “Go to hell.”
“You might want to watch what you say to me, Love. I have someone here who might dislike hearing you speak to me that way.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?”
“I think you know who I'm talking about. Here, listen.” I could hear a sound in the background, a deep groaning that washed my skin in terror. The hair on my neck stood up, my body convulsing.
“Can you hear that, Ivy?”
Muffled grunts turned to a scream, a loud smack and violent crack stabbed my ears like hot sparks. My brain was blistering, chest burning.
Dante?
Is that Dante?
“Let him go, Remo!” I screamed, stomping my foot on the floor.
“Of course I will. . .” Pausing, I could still hear the scuffling and abuse in the background. “When you're back where you belong. . . With me.”
“Let him go!”
“You know where I am, you know how to save him. You have two hours to get your ass here or I'll kill him, Ivy. Do you want that kind of blood on your hands?”
I wanted to reach through the phone and fucking choke him. How could he hold me responsible for this?
My voice was gone, I wasn't going to say another word to Remo.
“Two hours, Ivy.”
Click.
He was gone.
My heart was racing, adrenaline had hit my veins, every nerve in my body was firing off like a static charge.
He's not getting away with this.
I won't let him.
I didn't even have to think about what I was going to do. Remo had gotten to Dante, he had taken him from me. I wasn't going to stand for this type of shit anymore.
My fuse had blown, no amount of fear would stop me from helping the man I love, the father of my child.
Dante had done everything in his power to protect me.
Now it was time for me to do the same.
Glancing around the kitchen, I spotted the woodblock tucked snugly in the corner. Storming to the counter, I yanked out the largest blade in
side.
How am I going to get there?
Dante had the car, and there was no way I could walk that far in two hours. My feet started moving between the rooms downstairs. I wasn't sure what I was looking for, I wasn't sure if I'd find it.
But I wasn't giving up. I'd walk it if I had to.
Going door to door, room to room, I stopped short. The garage. Tucked away inside, covered under a thick, tan tarp was a car.
Bolting through the doorway, I frantically tore the paper off the present. The windows were tinted the color of charcoal, a soft layer of dust had muddied up the paint. Smiling, I walked around the car and let my finger leave a trail through the dust.
My luck was changing, the world around me that seemed so determined to bury me alive was lifting its harsh hands.
Perfect.
Tearing the door open, I ran my hands across the visor, feeling under the mat and searching any spot I thought the keys might be tucked away. Nothing. Standing in the cold garage, my hands fell to my hips.
They have to be here somewhere.
But where?
I wasn't going to leave any stone unturned. The keys were there, they had to be. All I had to do was find them. Bending back over, I was eyeing the inside when I spotted something.
There was a small flower-shaped air freshener hanging off the rearview mirror.
This was his mother's car.
My feet hit the concrete with force. Running back through the house, I made my way up to the bedroom that had been sealed off. If the keys were going to be anywhere, it was there.
My shoulder slammed into the door as I grabbed the handle and threw it open. Running to the desk, I shuffled through the drawers, tossing the papers out and letting them flutter to the floor.
They have to be here! They just have to!
I tore apart that fucking room, drawer after drawer, shelf after shelf, everything landed on the floor in chaos. But I couldn't find them.
Fuck! Come on!
Dragging my fingers through my hair, my eyes flicked rapidly around the room, scanning for anything that I might have missed. A light sparkle twinkled in the darkness between the bed and night stand.
Falling to my knees, I tugged out a small gold purse, his mother's purse. Tearing the zipper, I flipped it over and dumped it onto the floor. Sifting through the small pile, the silver spark of metal shined like a fucking prize.
Gotcha.
Remo isn't doing this anymore.
He's not my owner.
I'm not owned by anyone.
I'm Ivy.
And today is the day I take my life back.
Sixteen
Ivy
The car hummed as I sat in the dirt parking lot, my eyes feverishly locked on the brick, scanning it up and down. The lights were casting deep shadows over the building, dark, ominous forms took shape, forcing my insides to bubble.
The wounds Remo had inflicted reopened like sharp daggers in my core. All the scars visible and emotional, collied my skin in fresh blemishes. My hands tightened and flexed around the steering wheel, burning a hole into the leather.
It wasn't supposed to happen this way. We were the ones who were coming for him, we were the ones who were out for blood—not Remo.
And yet, here I was, lured to the den of my enemy to save the man I loved.
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
What the hell am I doing?
How the fuck am I going to get him back?
Peering out the corner of my eye, the blade twinkled beside me as it rested on the seat. Burnished in silver and screaming for blood, the knife held the vitality of a seed. It was about to morph from innocent into deadly, just like I was. There was no purity left in these bones.
I had thought there was a light at the end of the tunnel. . .
But I was wrong.
Did our luck run out?
Was Dante already dead?
My insides burned with the thought. I couldn't tear my hands from the steering wheel. My chest was tight, forcing in quick breaths. My forehead was already sweating just from the nerves that were violently aware of what could happen.
He found a way to bring me back to him, never once having to step outside that door. I felt like an animal trying to hide from a hunter, only to find that I was surrounded by a thick fence; baited, hooked, and reeled in.
That's what I was, I was his prey, and this was a trophy hunt.
I was holding back my urge to start counting, fighting off my body's need to go into protective mode and send me into unconsciousness. Every single piece of my body was tingling and ready to shut down, but I couldn't let it control me right then.
Remo had Dante, I had to do something. He knew I wouldn't be able to turn my back on Dante and that my hatred for him was enough to draw me in.
I'm pregnant, I have to be careful. This baby needs me. . .
But this baby also needs a father.
The adrenaline was like poison to my veins. It was rushing through like a tidal wave, making my body hot and cold. My head was throbbing, forcing me to think in fragmented images, not full comprehensive thought.
I felt my throat start to thin as everything from my past was flashing right in front of my eyes. Remo had still been able to control me even without being right there. His evil hand had led me here, just like he wanted it to.
No! This is done!
I'm done!
Taking in one huge swoop of air, I peeled my hands off the wheel and grabbed the knife. Was a knife the best choice in protection?
No.
But I didn't have anything else. Holding the handle, I twisted the blade in front of my face. It's better than nothing.
I had never felt so much madness flowing through me before. I hated him with every single piece of my soul. He had soured my life, turning me from an innocent young girl into a spoiled piece of flesh.
I was bruised and scarred so deep that nothing could ever wash it away. My life would never be the same because of him. It didn't matter how much I wanted normal. . .
I was never going to get it.
Leaning over the dash, I tried to look around and see if Remo had any of his guys watching. I couldn't see them, but I knew they had to be there. I could feel the black glare of night watchmen staring down through the thick lens of their weapons.
Don't worry about them.
They weren't going to touch me, Remo would never let another man do what he desired to do with his own two hands. He had bought me, I was his, and my life would end when he decided.
Just go, Ivy.
It's time to go.
Tucking the knife into the back of my jeans, I tugged my shirt down and opened the door. I didn't have a plan, I had no clue what the hell was about to happen, or what I would do.
I wished I had the power to see the future, I wished my gut hadn't been in so much pain already that I could listen to it.
But I was completely blank, walking into the unknown blindly. My head was clouded, eyes seeing nothing but red.
He has Dante, that's all that matters right now.
Save him, Ivy.
It's your turn.
Everything was so quiet, the gravel crunched under my feet like shards of broken glass. Listening to the world around me, even the ocean had been turned down. There was no wind, no waves rolling in and crashing against the docks.
It was dead silent, so calm it felt unnatural.
Every step echoed off the building, announcing my arrival. My hands were clammy, my mouth was dry. I was too nervous to even lick my lips, fearing the extra sound would travel to Remo and he would know I was there.
He already knows.
I felt stupid for even thinking my noise would alert him. He was waiting for me, this wasn't a surprise, this was his plan.
My pace was slow, each toe hitting the heel of the other as I walked to the front door. I didn't want to be there. The knife tapping against my back was a deadly reminder of what I knew.
I was going to kill him.
>
The door was only feet away when it opened slowly, flooding the dark lot in white light. Blinking quickly, I saw a short balding man I didn't recognize.
His head poked out through the crack, glasses falling down the bridge of his nose. “Celia?”
“Ivy.” My voice came out with a lot more force than I expected. As shattered as I had been, as nervous as I was; I was still strong. Nothing would change that.
This was a game. . .
And I was going to play the fuck out of it.
“Ivy,” he repeated back, opening the door so I could walk in. “Remo is waiting for you in the back.”
“I want to see Dante. Where is he?” My eyes scanned the room behind the head of Remo's door keeper. The lobby was empty, the back wall opening to various darkened hallways.
I had never stepped foot into this building before. Had I behaved as Remo asked, maybe I would've had the chance. A part of me was pissed at myself for not following his orders longer.
Had I just listened to him instead of fighting him every step of the way, maybe I would know the inside of this building just the same as my studies of his home.
It doesn't matter. Shaking my head, I pushed my regrets away. There was no point second guessing what I had done. I couldn't go back in time and it didn't change what was happening right then.
I will never regret fighting that asshole.
He deserved every ounce of what I gave back. Every lash from my tongue, every deliberate act of defiance. When he pushed, I pulled, when he spoke, I went deaf. Remo was the lowest form of life, and he didn't deserve a fucking thing.
“I'm sorry, I don't have the authority to answer any questions. You need to go see Remo.” Turning away from me, he started down the hall. “This way.” His rounded waist jiggled at his hips, the thick creases on the back of his neck glinted in sweat.
“No.” Crossing my arms, I stood as tall as I could. “I'm not going anywhere, where's Dante?”
The man stopped short, looking back at me over his shoulder. Taking one of his chubby fingers, he pushed his glasses back up on his nose. “Just come with me.”
“No.” My voice growled as it came out, teeth clenching down hard. Biting the inside of my mouth, my cheeks hollowed.