The resounding crack of Ivan’s hand against my cheek resounded in my head. An audible flashback that made me jump. I felt Brynn’s hand against my arm, and I whipped my head around to see her. Watching her while she watched me.
“It’s okay. You’re safe here,” she said.
I shrugged off her hand. “Thanks. I appreciate it.”
“Is there anything else you need for the night? Another blanket? Another change of clothes? Some more soap?”
“Actually, could you tell me a bit about Diesel?”
“Diesel?”
“Yeah. Your husband. I mean, if that’s not too much to ask.”
She sighed as she sat on my bed.
“Why?”
I paused. “I guess… just to get an idea of who he is.”
“To figure out whether or not he’s worth saving?”
I snickered. “That really the kind of person I come off as?”
And when she shrugged, the truth became hard to swallow.
“I’m sorry. I’m just—used to fighting and fending for myself.”
Brynn nodded. “I’ve noticed. You don’t have to do that here, though. You can help us, and we can help you. However, you need help. You dictate how you need the help, and that’s what we help with.”
“Even if it means helping to get back into the mafia’s good graces?”
She snickered. “It’ll come with backlash. But, yes. Even that.”
I walked over and sat down beside her.
“What’s Diesel like?”
Brynn smiled off into the distance. “He’s romantic. Strong. A devil of a man in bed.”
I giggled. “Always the best.”
She laughed. “Right? Oh, there’s a reason we’ve got kids. And we honestly want more. We just… can’t get the timing down.”
“Because of the gang?”
“Club, but yes. This lifestyle does come with a sort of danger. We’re worried about being outnumbered when it comes to children versus adults and being overrun in more ways than one.”
I shook my head. “I don’t want kids.”
“You don’t?”
“Nah. I’m needy and clingy enough when I’m not pushing people away. My baby-daddy-husband would be driven absolutely insane with my clinginess and an infant’s neediness.”
She giggled. “Then, find a man who enjoys clinginess.”
“That exists?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. Have you tried looking for it?”
“Good point.”
She sighed. “My husband was taken by the mafia. They’ve been threatening our club ever since we took in a couple of our new members. Cage and Sutton. You’ll meet them soon enough. Cage is Diesel’s half-brother, and they’ve been on our case ever since we took them in.”
“Why?”
“It’s long and involved. But the short of the story is Cage used to be involved with a club the mafia slaughtered. Cage survived, and the mafia didn’t like that. Plus, Sutton is the mafioso’s daughter.”
My eyebrows rose. “Well. Yeah. I see why they’re coming after you guys, then.”
“But we protect family. Always. So, now, we’re just trying to take down the mafia without losing any of our members. And it’s been a tough haul. The mafia has a great deal of resources at their disposal. And we’re just a motorcycle club. Getting Diesel back is the first phase of a plan that hasn’t really gotten off the ground yet. In all honesty, I’m really hoping you’ll help us.”
“I don't know what you think I can help with. I was just a waitress in a casino.”
“The casino the head of the mafia organized himself.”
My brow furrowed. “How do you know so much about what’s going on? Aren’t women supposed to be kept in the dark on this shit? You know, ‘man work’ and all that?”
She laughed. “They talk that loudly all the time. We all hear them. It’s a matter of keeping our kids shrouded away from it.”
“Wow. That’s—that’s just…yikes.”
“Yeah. It is. Especially when we’re all cooped up here.”
“How long have you guys been here?”
She sighed. “Days. Weeks. They all blend together at this point. But the point of what I’m saying is that Lars—the head of the mafia—is now using my husband’s life as a pawn to end this war we’ve tripped and fallen into. And they won’t hesitate to kill him in the most gruesome of ways if we don’t give them what they want.”
My cheeks puffed out with my sigh. “Those are some serious stakes.”
“Yes. They are. And I want you to know what’s really at stake because I think that helps. Toxin? He’s rough around the edges. I don’t know his story, and Brewer won’t tell us his whole story, but—”
“Who’s Brewer?”
Brynn cleared her throat. “Whenever someone wants to join the club, they become a prospect. But they need a personal referral from a member of the group. Brewer was who recommended Toxin become a prospect of the group. And the only thing he’ll tell us is that he found Toxin rummaging through trash in town.”
“Excuse me. Trash?”
“Yep. Brewer found him, took him in, and eventually brought him to the crew. Diesel said it was the shortest prospect meeting he’d ever attended. But neither Brewer nor Toxin will tell us why he was out on the street, or even where he comes from.”
“If you know so little about him, why let him in?”
She patted my knee. “Because there’s a side to Toxin you haven't witnessed yet. A caring side. A side that wants to help and not harm.”
I paused. “Are we talking about the same person?”
She snickered. “We are, yes. He’s rough. I’m not denying that. But past that roughness and underneath that jagged exterior is a good man. Probably one of the best men we’ve had in this club. And that’s including my husband.”
I blinked. “That’s… hard to imagine.”
“For now, maybe. But if you stick around and help us, you’ll see it with time. You’ll come to love him. Like the rest of us do.”
“Let’s maybe not use a word as strong as ‘love.’”
She laughed. “Okay. Maybe not that strongly. But you get what I’m saying.”
“Yeah. I do.”
She stood from the bed. “Can I ask you a question?”
I nodded. “Shoot?”
“You said something about the mafia protecting you. Right?”
I grinned. “How much did you really eavesdrop on?”
“Enough.”
“I like your style.”
“And I like yours. For the most part. I could use a little less yelling.”
I smiled. “Noted.”
“You said the mafia was protecting you. From what, though?”
My smile faltered. “Just my past.”
“Is someone after you?”
“I don’t know.”
“Are you afraid someone’s after you?”
“Yes.”
She nodded slowly. “You should tell the guys. They can’t protect you from what they don’t know.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
“I know you want to believe good about the mafia because of what they provided you. But what we’ve found out about them? It’s horrendous. The slaughtering. The human trafficking. The torture.”
I blinked. “I’m sorry. Human trafficking?”
She nodded. “Of women, specifically. I urge you to talk to our girls. They have stories from your mafia that would spin your head. They aren’t the kind of organization you think they are.”
“I mean, I never assumed they had their hands clean. But human trafficking?”
“Yeah. The guys raided a hotel not too long ago with the police. You can pull up articles on Rock’s laptop in the morning if you want to read about it.”
Holy shit. Was Phillip in on this stuff? “Maybe I’ll do that.”
Brynn walked over to my door. “You really should. But for now? We all need rest. In the morning, we
can sit down over coffee and figure out your next steps.”
I nodded slowly. “Okay.”
“And if you need anything, I’m the first door on the left once you turn right down the hallway. Just diagonal from you.”
I nodded again. “Okay.”
“Take some breaths. It’ll all be okay in the end. That, I can promise you. If you help us.”
I nodded again, mindlessly. “Thanks.”
She left the room and I fell against the mattress. I stared aimlessly at the ceiling as my mind swirled with so many things. The mafia was doing this? Was Phillip helping them with any of this? I didn’t realize they were doing such terrible things. Underground gambling is one. And sure, they rented out “sex rooms.” Prostitution, and all that. But human trafficking? Torture? Those are psychopathic issues.
Did I work for a bunch of psychopaths?
“Shit,” I whispered.
I mean, they were protecting me from my ex. Hiding me. Dropping me off the radar so Ivan couldn't get to me. But the horrible stuff they were doing to people was outstanding. I mean, if even half of what Brynn said was true? I’d been working for men who wouldn’t think twice about killing me.
They wanted you dead tonight.
“Oh, no,” I whimpered.
We can keep you safe, if you do what we ask.
Keep your head down, and don’t ask questions.
That isn’t a place you should be going. Don’t worry about it. Just focus on your job.
This man will be dealt with swiftly. Don't you worry about it.
Flashes of conversations with Phillip bombarded my mind. And with Brynn’s context, tears rushed my eyes. Innocent words no longer seemed so innocent. And the more I thought about it, the more their ruthlessness showed. Men I’d reported for manhandling me on the floor of the casino. Men that conveniently never showed back up. I figured they had been banned.
But, had they been killed?
Am I responsible for their deaths?
“Holy shit,” I breathed.
I mean, if the mafia really was that ruthless, then it changed everything. Every conversation I’d had with Phillip, right down to when he told me the mafia could protect me. I was never veiled to who I’d been working for. Phillip had never lied to me about the organization I worked alongside. But as conversation after conversation filled my mind, my eyes grew wider and watery. And as tears streaked my cheeks, I slowly sat up.
What kind of power did Phillip really have with the mafia?
13
Toxin
I went to bed, but I couldn't sleep. After shit finally settled down, I perched in the kitchen. I listened for the moment Brynn left the room Natasha was in for the night. And after creeping down the hallway, I perched by her door. I listened. Kept watch. Ready to intercept her the second she decided to slip away again.
But all I got were her soft snores through the door.
I went and laid down. But I couldn't get her running out of my head. I bolted upright at every little sound. I tossed and turned, trying to find a comfortable position to sleep in. I worried about her leaving again. Sneaking away just before the break of dawn and getting herself killed somewhere. I didn’t know why. She’d been a pain in my dickhole since I’d found her in that fucking back room of the casino.
And yet, my mind raced.
Hours passed. Three in the morning. Four. Five in the morning. Soon, five thirty ticked over on the digital clock beside me and I groaned. It was no use. I wasn’t sleeping anytime tonight.
So, I decided to get myself a snack.
Dressed in nothing but boxers and a t-shirt, I padded out to the kitchen. I scratched behind my head as I yawned. I shuffled into the darkened kitchen and opened the fridge, trying to figure out a midnight snack concoction. It wasn’t really a midnight snack, though. In two hours, the sunrise would begin. Signaling yet another day Diesel was being tortured instead of home. With his family.
You really fucked this up.
I pushed the thoughts from my mind. I pulled out some sandwich meat and vegetables. The mayonnaise. Mustard. Other things to slap on a sandwich. And as I reached for the bread, the hairs on the nape of my neck stood on end.
Causing me to stop in my tracks.
I held my breath. I closed my eyes. I tuned into the sounds and smells around me. I slowly lowered my hand, forgetting about the bread as I heard it. The smallest creak of the wooden floorboards of the house. The foundation cracked. I heard soft breaths coming down the hallway. I opened my eyes and reached into the kitchen drawer, wrapping my fingers around a steak knife.
And as I turned around with the knife shrouded against the underside of my arm, those brooding eyes appeared. Dark. Twinkling. Wide awake, despite the early morning hours.
Causing me to let out a sigh.
“Natasha, the hell are you doing up so early?” I asked.
She snickered. “You say that like I fell asleep.”
“You did. I heard you snoring.”
“I don’t snore.”
“You wanna bet on that?”
She stepped out from the shadows. “You making a sandwich?”
“I don’t share my food.”
“Trust me, I don’t either. It takes calories to keep up these curves.”
My cheeks ticked with a grin. “Want me to make you one?”
“What? You think I can’t make my own sandwich?”
“Is everything always a battle with you? Or is it some kink you have?”
She snickered. “Careful, now. We might get too loud for the kiddies in the house.”
“Not my problem you’re a screamer.”
“Wouldn’t you like to know.”
She came over to me and reached around my body. After pulling a shaving of turkey off the top of the pile, she tossed it into her mouth. She smiled wildly at me as she chewed, and it made me chuckle. Oh, she was cheeky. A feisty young woman.
In any other world, she would’ve been mine for the night.
“So, what kept you up tonight?” she asked.
I watched her hoist herself onto the kitchen counter. Her long legs, swinging against the cabinetry. My eyes lingered on her thighs. Those bare thighs covered only by a long t-shirt. They were smooth. Soft. Delectable, and ready for my taking. She had socks on her feet, and I found myself wanting to slide them off and give them a nice massage.
Before working my way up between her legs.
“Sometimes, I can’t sleep,” I said.
Natasha nodded. “Any particular reason?”
“Nightmares, mostly.”
“About…?”
I started making my sandwich. “A former life.”
“Sounds ominous.”
“Not really something I like talking about.”
“Trust me, I get it. I don’t like talking about my former life either.”
I nodded. “You mean your mafia life?”
“No, the one before that. The one that makes the mafia look like a vacation.”
I paused. “That good, huh?”
She snickered. “Something tells me you understand that.”
I cleared my throat. “I suppose I should ask you the obvious.”
She snorted. “You’re wanting to know if I was trying to sneak out.”
I slowly looked over at her. “Did you just snort?”
“What? You never heard a girl snort before?”
“No.”
“Wait, really?”
I shook my head. “Never.”
“Well, get used to it. Because if anyone in here says anything remotely funny, it’s Snortsville for me.”
“Charming.”
“Ah, you know how to woo the women, don’t you?”
I turned my attention back to my sandwich. “At any rate, I don’t think any of us are in a joking mood. So, you might get to tuck your piggish ways back in for a little while.”
“I don’t know whether to be flattered or insulted.”
“Yep. You haven't gotten
much sleep then.”
She pushed me playfully and giggled. And the sound wrapped me up, warming me to my core. I grinned at her, stealing a glance at her smile as it spread across her face. As it lit up her features. As it brightened her entire presence.
She looked good in a smile.
“Plus, I told Brynn I’d wait until the morning to figure things out. And you know it’s never morning until the sun comes up,” she said.
I shrugged. “Anything before ten A.M. isn’t morning, if you ask me.”
“I like your style, Toxin.”
She reached over and placed the last piece of bread on top of my sandwich. And after crushing it down, she picked it up. I watched her with a slacked jaw as she eyed me playfully. Wrapping her lips around the outside of the sandwich. She took the largest bite, too. Mustard and mayonnaise imprinted itself against her cheeks. She moaned as she chewed, licking her lips. Her fingertips. Gracing me with sounds I wanted to hear while her throat was stuffed with my dick.
Down, boy.
“And here I thought you could make your own sandwich,” I said, chuckling.
“Mm. It looked so good, though. You should really have one,” she said with her mouth full.
I laughed. “Yeah. I guess I’ll whip one right up.”
She winked. “You really should.”
I made myself another sandwich, listening as she softly groaned over the one I’d made. Not for her, of course. That one had been stolen from me. But I found I didn’t mind. I picked up my sandwich and took a bite. I turned around and leaned against the kitchen counter. I wanted to ask her so many things. Learn so much about her. Including her life before the mafia.
But I had a lot of faith I needed to show, first.
“A cult,” I said.
Natasha paused in the corner of my eye. “What?”
“My life before the club. The one I don’t want to talk about much. I was raised on a compound inside a cult.”
“You—wai—you’re—are you serious?”
I nodded as I took a bite of my sandwich.
“Toxin, look at me.”
I glanced at her. “Yes?”
“What kind of a cult?”
I shrugged. “Religious. They usually are. A massive compound right in the middle of a deserted area of New Mexico. I was born into it by my mother. Who was nothing more than a child herself.”
Dead Souls MC: Prospects Series Books 1-5 Page 69