PRAISE FOR THE NEW YORK TIMES
BESTSELLING
SCUMBLE RIVER SERIES
Murder of the Cat’s Meow
“Swanson serves up another romance-sweetened tale of murder in the endearingly zany town of Scumble River.”
—Chicago Tribune
“Well-crafted. . . . From normal to nutty, the folks of Scumble River will tickle the fancy of cozy fans.”
—Publishers Weekly
Murder of a Creped Suzette
“Another great book by this master of the small-town mystery.”
—CrimeSpree Magazine
“A Swanson novel is always going to have tongue-in-cheek humor, complex motives, and unique murders. The latest cleverly crafted tale is another entertaining mystery.”
—Romantic Times
Murder of a Bookstore Babe
“In the latest installment in her cozy Scumble River series, Swanson serves up another irresistible slice of romance-spiced mystery.”
—Chicago Tribune
“As always, Skye Denison and Scumble River provide a reliable, enjoyable mystery. Reading about Scumble River is as comfortable as being in your own hometown.”
—The Mystery Reader
Murder of a Wedding Belle
“The latest carefully crafted installment in Swanson’s Scumble River series features a charming heroine who is equally skilled at juggling detection and romance.”
—Chicago Tribune
“As always . . . Swanson combines humor and romance within an intriguing homicide investigation while the support cast feels like friends.”
—Midwest Book Review
Murder of a Royal Pain
“The series remains fresh and dramatic; a great combination, which translates to an enjoyable and intriguing reading experience.”
—Once Upon a Romance
“A trip to Scumble River is like visiting with old friends . . . another entry into a fine series that is sure to be on most must-read lists.”
—The Mystery Reader
Murder of a Chocolate-Covered Cherry
“[A] cleverly crafted plot . . . with a generous dash of romance.”
—Chicago Tribune
“Top-notch storytelling with truly unique and wonderful characters.”
—CrimeSpree Magazine
Murder of Botoxed Blonde
“Endearing . . . quirky . . . a delight.”
—Chicago Tribune
“Tight plotting and plenty of surprises keep this series on my must-read list.”
—CrimeSpree Magazine
Murder of a Real Bad Boy
“Swanson is a born storyteller.”
—CrimeSpree Magazine
“Another knee-slapping adventure in Scumble River.”
—The Amplifier (KY)
Murder of a Smart Cookie
“Smartly spins on a solid plot and likable characters.”
—South Florida Sun-Sentinel
Murder of a Pink Elephant
“The must-read book of the summer.”
—Butler County Post (KY)
Murder of a Barbie and Ken
“Another sidesplitting visit to Scumble River . . . with some of the quirkiest and most eccentric characters we ever have met.”
—Butler County Post (KY)
Murder of a Snake in the Grass
“An endearing and realistic character . . . a fast-paced, enjoyable read.”
—The Herald News (MA)
Murder of a Sleeping Beauty
“Another delightful and intriguing escapade.”
—Mystery News
Murder of a Sweet Old Lady
“More fun than the Whirl-A-Gig at the County Fair and tastier than a corn dog.”
—The Charlotte Austin Review
Murder of a Small-Town Honey
“Bounces along with gently wry humor and jaunty twists and turns. The quintessential amateur sleuth: bright, curious, and more than a little nervy.”
—Agatha Award–winning author Earlene Fowler
PRAISE FOR THE
DEVEREAUX’S DIME STORE MYSTERY SERIES
“Veteran author Swanson debuts a spunky new heroine with a Missouri stubborn streak. . . . Readers will like this one for its slightly zany, mutigenerational take on small-town mores.”
—Library Journal (Starred Review)
“A new entertaining mystery series that her fans will appreciate. . . . With a touch of romance in the air, readers will enjoy this delightful cozy.”
—Genre Go Round Reviews
“Swanson has a gift for portraying small-town life, making it interesting, and finding both the ridiculous and the satisfying parts of living in one. I wish Dev a long and happy shelf life.”
—AnnArbor.com
“A top-notch new mystery . . . all the right ingredients for another successful series.”
—Romantic Times
Also by Denise Swanson
SCUMBLE RIVER MYSTERIES
Murder of the Cat’s Meow
Murder of a Creped Suzette
Murder of a Bookstore Babe
Murder of a Wedding Belle
Murder of a Royal Pain
Murder of a Chocolate-Covered Cherry
Murder of a Botoxed Blonde
Murder of a Real Bad Boy
Murder of a Smart Cookie
Murder of a Pink Elephant
Murder of a Barbie and Ken
Murder of a Snake in the Grass
Murder of a Sleeping Beauty
Murder of a Sweet Old Lady
Murder of a Small-Town Honey
“Not a Monster of a Chance,” short story in
And the Dying Is Easy
“Dead Blondes Tell No Tales,” novella in
Drop-Dead Blonde
DEVEREAUX’S DIME STORE MYSTERIES
Nickeled-and-Dimed to Death
Little Shop of Homicide
Murder of a Stacked Librarian
A Scumble River Mystery
Denise Swanson
OBSIDIAN
Published by the Penguin Group
Penguin Group (USA) Inc., 375 Hudson Street,
New York, New York 10014, USA
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For more information about the Penguin Group visit penguin.com.
First published by Obsidian, an imprint of New American Library,
a division of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.
Copyright © Denise Swanson Stybr, 2013
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Purchase only authorized editions.
OBSIDIAN and logo are trademarks of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.
ISBN 978-1-10159455-1
PUBLISHER’S NOTE
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
The publisher does not have any control over and does not assume any responsibility for author or third-party Web sites or their content.
Contents
Praise
Also by Denise Swanson
Title page
Copyright page
Dedication
; Author’s Note
CHAPTER 1: By the Book
CHAPTER 2: A Book in the Hand
CHAPTER 3: Lost and Foundering
CHAPTER 4: Read Something into It
CHAPTER 5: Don’t Be Shelfish
CHAPTER 6: By Book or by Crook
CHAPTER 7: Read Between the Lines
CHAPTER 8: Read Her the Riot Act
CHAPTER 9: Due as I Say
CHAPTER 10: Beyond the Tale
CHAPTER 11: Babble like a Book
CHAPTER 12: Chilled to the Tome
CHAPTER 13: Cock-and-Bull Story
CHAPTER 14: In a Binding
CHAPTER 15: Truth Is Stranger Than Fiction
CHAPTER 16: Draw the Line
CHAPTER 17: Read Him like a Book
CHAPTER 18: Chapter and Verse
CHAPTER 19: Leave No Page Unturned
CHAPTER 20: Out of Circulation
CHAPTER 21: Easier Read Than Done
CHAPTER 22: Much Overdue About Nothing
CHAPTER 23: Many Happy Book Returns
CHAPTER 24: If Books Could Kill
CHAPTER 25: Throw the Book At
EPILOGUE: Checking Out
Excerpt from Dead Between the Line
In memory of Sally Fellows, an inspirational teacher, thoughtful mystery reviewer, and true friend
Author’s Note
In July of 2000, when the first book in my Scumble River series, Murder of a Small-Town Honey, was published, it was written in “real time.” It was the year 2000 in Skye’s life as well as mine, but after several books in a series, time becomes a problem. It takes me from seven months to a year to write a book, and then it is usually another year from the time I turn that book in to my editor until the reader sees it on a bookstore shelf. This can make the timeline confusing. Different authors handle this matter in different ways. After a great deal of deliberation, I decided that Skye and her friends and family would age more slowly than those of us who don’t live in Scumble River. So to catch everyone up, the following is when the books take place:
Murder of a Small-Town Honey—August 2000
Murder of a Sweet Old Lady—March 2001
Murder of a Sleeping Beauty—April 2002
Murder of a Snake in the Grass—August 2002
Murder of a Barbie and Ken—November 2002
Murder of a Pink Elephant—February 2003
Murder of a Smart Cookie—June 2003
Murder of a Real Bad Boy—September 2003
Murder of a Botoxed Blonde—November 2003
Murder of a Chocolate-Covered Cherry—April 2004
Murder of a Royal Pain—October 2004
Murder of a Wedding Belle—June 2005
Murder of a Bookstore Babe—September 2005
Murder of a Creped Suzette—October 2005
Murder of the Cat’s Meow—March 2006
Murder of a Stacked Librarian—December 2006
And this is when the Scumble River short story and novella take place:
“Not a Monster of a Chance” in And the Dying Is Easy—June 2001
“Dead Blondes Tell No Tales” in Drop-Dead Blonde—March 2003
Scumble River is not a real town. The characters and events portrayed in these pages are entirely fictional, and any resemblance to living persons is pure coincidence.
CHAPTER 1
By the Book
Skye Denison adjusted the stack of books in front of her, making sure that she was completely concealed behind their brightly colored spines. It was the morning of December 23, exactly a week before her wedding, and she was hiding out in the Scumble River Public Library.
She was supposed to be working on writing her vows, but in truth, things had gotten out of hand and she was avoiding all the people who were stressing her out. She’d known from the minute she set the date that her mother would drive her crazy, but she hadn’t anticipated that others would join May on that trip. As it turned out, the entire town had an opinion. From the flowers for the church to the menu at the reception, people stopped Skye wherever she went to lobby for their favorite selection.
Didn’t they realize that all the choices had been made months ago and it was far too late for Skye to change her mind now? Unless she just called off the whole shebang and went back to her nice, boring, regular life. Surely Wally wouldn’t mind delaying their marriage another year, or two, or ten. He was a patient guy and didn’t deserve the psycho bride she was becoming.
Skye’s fiancé, Wally Boyd, the town’s chief of police, had been strangely exempt from all the hoopla. It might have been his age—he was forty-three—or the fact that he had been married once before, or because he was male, but no one was making helpful suggestions to him about the decor or the food or telling him what not to wear.
Sighing, Skye closed The Everything Wedding Vows Book: Anything and Everything You Could Possibly Say at the Altar—and Then Some and added it to her camouflage pile. Next up was Yes! I Will! I Do!: Your Step-by-Step Guide to Creating a Wedding Ceremony as Unique as You Are. She examined the pale pink cover, then flipped it open to the index. As she ran her finger down the column, looking for the chapter on vows, a loud voice drew her attention to the circulation desk.
Chip Nicolet, the owner of the new health club, Guns and Poses, had backed librarian Yvonne Osborn against the counter and appeared to be enthralled with the beautiful woman’s many assets. The muscular man’s expression reminded Skye of her cat, Bingo, just before the Fancy Feast was spooned into his bowl—hunger, impatience, and entitlement all mixed together in a quivering mass of desire.
Yvonne had been substituting for Scumble River’s regular library director since June, and during that time, Skye had noticed that although the temporary librarian had the hourglass figure of a Playboy Bunny, her outlook on life was more like Margaret Thatcher’s than one of Hugh Hefner’s average cottontails. Apparently, Chip hadn’t gotten the memo on that, because he was staring at Yvonne’s considerable bustline and nearly drooling.
Happy for a distraction from her wedding woes, but more than a bit alarmed at the man’s belligerent attitude, Skye pushed aside a pillar of books and leaned forward to hear the conversation. She felt a twinge of conscience at blatantly eavesdropping, but anything was better than thinking about the big day looming on her horizon like a dentist appointment for a root canal. Why, oh, why hadn’t she eloped like her brother and his new wife had?
Skye saw that Yvonne was trying to shush Chip, but evidently the health club owner had never heard of the “whisper in the library” rule because he boomed, “Come on. Say you’ll go out with me.”
“No.” Yvonne’s expression was adamant. “Now move aside and let me do my job.”
“I promise you, you’ll have a good time,” Chip persisted, edging closer.
“I seriously doubt it.” Yvonne took a deep breath, causing her chest to expand and Chip to stare. “Is there a book I can help you find?”
“A book?” Chip looked confused.
“You know, those items lined up on the shelves.” Yvonne pointed to the crowded bookcases around the room. “The reason you came into the library.”
“I know what a book is. What? Do you think I’m an idiot?” Chip snarled. “I just didn’t realize anyone still read them.”
“Yes. Many people whose attention span is longer than a television commercial still read books.”
“I’ll make a mental note of that,” Chip jeered.
“That might be difficult for you to do since your pencil is obviously out of lead.” Yvonne’s voice was cool. “And since it doesn’t appear you’re here for any of the library’s usual services, is there something else I can help you with? Perhaps directions to the bathroom?”
“What?” Chip wrinkled his brow. “Why do you think I need to go to the can?”
“Frankly”—Yvonne placed her palms on Chip’s well-developed pecs and pushed, but he didn’t budge—“I don’t think about you at all.”
“Well, you shoul
d.” His gaze dropped to her curvy bottom. “A hottie like you should be hooking up with someone like me, not acting like a nun. Who are you saving it for?”
“Myself.” Yvonne finally managed to step to the side and wiggle past him. “I’ve found that I’m much better company than most men.”
The library was divided into two main rooms, and Yvonne pushed a cart toward the section where Skye was sitting. A few wooden chairs and tables shared the cramped space with jam-packed bookshelves and racks stuffed with magazines. Yvonne stopped a few feet from Skye and started reshelving novels, pointedly ignoring the man who had followed her.
When Chip moved in front of Yvonne and put his palm on her shoulder, Skye’s initial twinge of alarm grew stronger, and she dug her cell phone out of her tote bag, ready to call for help.
“Go out with me tonight. There’s a new spot in Kankakee that’s supposed to really rock,” Chip wheedled.
“No.” Yvonne glanced down at the wet spot where his fingers had rested and said, “If you’re perspiring this much standing still, I’d hate to see you dancing.”
“If you ain’t sweating, you ain’t doing it right,” Chip boasted. He smoothed a hand over his shaved head. “If you don’t want to go to a club, we could grab a pizza and go to my place.”
“No.” Yvonne reached around him and slid a hardback into place, straightening the spine before adding, “Thank you, but I have other plans.”
“Babe, you don’t know what you’re missing.” Chip flexed his right arm, making his biceps bulge. Although it was winter, he had on a short-sleeved black T-shirt, formfitting jeans, and leather trainers.
“I know exactly what I’m missing,” Yvonne assured him, narrowing her baby blue eyes. “Just because I don’t want to date a Neanderthal like you doesn’t mean I’m living a life of chastity.”
As Yvonne reached around him again, Chip’s hands spanned her tiny waist and pulled her against him. “Don’t call me a Neanderthal.”
Murder of a Stacked Librarian: A Scumble River Mystery Page 1