by Naomi Niles
“I’m counting on it.” I waved goodbye to Jackson and headed to my pick up.
I turned the volume up and drove to Peter’s with the music crashing through the confined space. That was my go to relaxation technique after I’d finished a long shift. Nothing calmed me down faster than deafening music that crowded out all the stress of the job.
Peter was on the porch when I pulled up. He was wearing a checkered shirt and old jeans. “Hi, bud,” I greeted. “You look like a cowboy from an old Western.”
“Will you turn down the fucking volume,” he replied. “You’ll disrupt the whole neighborhood.”
I turned off my engine and the music died immediately. “Please,” I said. “The neighborhood at this moment includes your house and Victor’s. And Victor works late.”
“I’m here, aren’t I?”
I shrugged. “And, I enjoy pissing you off.”
Peter shook his head at me. “Run out of food at home, did you?”
I gave him an innocent smile. “Just a tad. I really need to buy groceries.”
“Why?” he asked. “You never actually use them. You either eat from here or you eat from out.”
“Very true,” I nodded. “Guilty as charged.”
“Really, Sam,” a soft feminine voice called from inside the house. “It’s not healthy to eat out so often.”
A moment later, Mom stepped out onto the porch. She was a small woman with delicate features. She had beautiful hazel eyes and dark hair that she had passed on to three of her five sons. She was wearing jeans and a long sleeved shirt that looked a little too big for her. She came forward and gave me a tight hug. It had become habit and now I had come to expect it.
She hugged me as though she hadn’t seen me in years, and I knew that when I left, she would hug me as though she were afraid she wouldn’t see me again for years. I understood why, though. After more than fifteen years, we had been recently reunited. Now that we were in each other’s lives again, she didn’t want to take for granted the little things, even if it was as simple as a hug.
“Eating here is one thing,” she continued. “But I don’t like that you eat out so much.”
“I try to eat healthy,” I said.
Peter snorted at my obvious lie, and I shot him a look. “Well… I burn a lot. And, I do my best to keep healthy.”
“Exercise alone isn’t enough,” Mom lectured me. “You need to maintain a balanced diet, too.”
“It’s not exactly ‘eating out,’” I said. “I eat here or at the fire station.”
“Yeah…cause the station is usually packed full of healthy snacks,” Peter said, rolling his eyes.
“It is…when Grady or Burt is the kitty-man.”
“The what?” Mom asked with a confused look on her face.
I smiled. “Kitty,” I said. “It’s basically a collection of things, usually food items that everyone puts money towards and uses when we’re at the station.”
“Tell me next time you’re the kitty then,” she said. “I’ll get together some healthy options.”
I laughed. “It’s kitty-man, Mom.”
“Right… Sure,” she nodded, as though the exact term was inconsequential.
“Where’s Madison?” I asked, in an obvious attempt to change the topic.
Peter and Mom exchanged a smile, and it left a warm feeling in my chest. She had fit seamlessly into our lives. She and Peter seemed to have their own language sometimes. If I hadn’t been so grateful that Mom was back, I might have been a little jealous at their obvious bond. But that probably had to do with the fact that she was living temporarily with Madison and Peter.
“She’s in the kitchen,” Peter replied. “Getting dinner ready.”
“You didn’t cook today?” I asked.
“We cooked together actually,” he replied. “I’m teaching Madison a couple of things.”
I laughed. “And, how did that go.”
Mom’s smile was telling, but she looked amused more than anything else. “She’s…not exactly a natural,” Peter conceded. “But she made progress today.”
“She’s determined though,” Mom said.
“She is,” he nodded. “And, I don’t know why. I told her I’m happy to do all the cooking.”
“She wants to be able to cook for her kids,” Mom said.
Peter looked at her abruptly, raising his eyebrows. “What?”
She gave him a secretive smile. “We were talking this morning, Madison and I, and she mentioned that she would like to cook homemade meals for her children.”
“Oh,” Peter said, sounding a little shell-shocked.
“I knew this would happen,” I sighed.
“What would happen?” he asked, turning to me pointedly.
“Alan and Jessica are officially engaged, John and Kami just shacked up together, and you and Madison are practically engaged,” I said. “Obviously she’s thinking of the next step.”
“The next step would be…actually getting married,” Peter pointed out.
“When will that be exactly?” Mom asked, giving Peter a curiously innocent glance.
He looked between us and then he smiled. “She has a promise ring,” he replied. “It’s going to happen… Just…not yet.”
“Why not?” Mom demanded.
“You’re eager,” Peter smiled.
“She’s a lovely girl. You two are perfect for one another and… I would love to see one of my sons walking down the aisle.”
“Then you’ll be disappointed, Mom,” Peter said. “I don’t think Madison and I are the traditional type. It’s more likely that we’ll elope together or something.”
“You wouldn’t,” she said, sounding aghast. “You’d really elope and prevent your family from being there?”
“Why are we even talking about this?” he asked, raising his hands in frustration. “Nothing is happening. This conversation is way too premature!”
I laughed, thrilled with how uncomfortable he looked. “Don’t be so evasive, dear brother,” I said, backing him into a corner. “Answer the question.”
Peter narrowed his eyes at me.
“What?” I asked innocently. “You have the perfect girl; it’s a fair question.”
“Speaking of perfect girls,” Mom said. “Isn’t it about time you tried to find one, too, Sam?”
I glanced at her; surprised at the turn the conversation had taken. Peter laughed at the expression on my face and then he gave me a look that clearly said, “serves you right.”
“Umm… Well… The thing is, Mom…”
“Don’t be evasive, dear brother,” Peter said, throwing my own words back in my face. “Answer the question.
I sighed. “I am so not interested in a relationship. Commitment is all well and good for you and Alan and JJ, but I’m not cut from that cloth.”
“Meaning?” she asked.
“I’m not the settling down type, Mom,” I said.
To my surprise, she gave me a smile. “Famous last words,” she announced.
“Hardly,” I said quickly. “I just want to play the field.”
“He’s young,” Madison said, as she appeared at the front door. It was obvious she had caught the last bit of our conversation. “Give it time.”
“Hi, Mads,” I greeted. “These two are bullying me into finding a girlfriend.”
“I don’t blame them,” she said. “A steady girlfriend would do you a world of good, I think.”
I rolled my eyes. “You are all conspiring against me.”
Madison laughed and the braids in her hair danced a little. I had to hand it to my brothers – they knew how to pick ‘em. Madison was easy to get along with, kind, thoughtful, and very pretty.
“I’m sure the meal we’ve prepared will make it up to you,” she said.
“Mmm, that just might do the trick.” I nodded as we paraded inside for dinner.
I spent a couple of hours with the family, exchanging stories and just having fun. Afterwards, I headed over to
Jackson’s bar, which he had chosen to name “Jackson’s Bar.” It wasn’t the most original name, but it was easy to remember.
The place was in full swing when I walked in. I scanned the room and instantly a few different girls caught my eye. I headed to the bar first to get myself a drink just as Jackson materialized on my right.
“Hi, man,” he greeted. “You made it.”
“Course I made it,” I replied. “Free booze and hot girls… Why on earth would I be a no show?”
“Good point,” he nodded. “See anything you like?”
“I see everything I like,” I said, surveying the room.
“Well, go crazy, man,” he said.
I finished my drink and headed towards the tiny dance floor. It was small enough that everyone was wedged in together, which provided the perfect excuse to make conversation. The girl I ended up dancing with was the one I had noticed as I had arrived. She was slim, but still voluptuous, and that suited me just fine. I liked something to grab on to.
She had long blonde hair and a skin-tight dress that put her nipples on full display. She ended up grinding against me on the dance floor, making an obvious invitation. We spent a good ten minutes making out on the dance floor with my hands on her ass. She was the one who made the first move, though.
“Let’s get out of here,” she said, whispering into my ear.
I passed Jackson on the way out of the bar and gave him a suggestive wink. He laughed out loud and gave me a thumbs up. I gave silent thanks to my new pick up truck and its spacious backseat.
Chapter Four
Mia
“Hi, angel,” I greeted as Renni spotted me and came running through the gates.
“Hi, Mommy,” she replied. “Did you save the man?”
I took her hand as we started walking back to where I’d parked the car. “I’m still working on it,” I told her. “These things take time.”
Renni nodded, and I could tell from the set of her mouth that she was in a thoughtful mood. We were almost at the car when I heard a voice call out my name. I turned to find myself faced with Erica Carpe.
Her son went to Renni’s kindergarten, and we had known each other for a few years. We used to go to the same gym, and it had been mere coincidence that our kids had ended up at the same kindergarten.
“Mia, I haven’t seen you in awhile,” she said.
She was the nosy type, and it was for that very reason that I preferred to avoid her. It helped that Renni didn’t much care for her son, either, though it was sometimes awkward having to make up excuses to get out of play dates.
“We see each other all the time,” I reminded her.
“But we haven’t really spoken in ages.” She smiled, and her blue eyes were constantly curious. “And, I noticed the other day that someone else picked Renni up from school.”
“That was Aunty Vanessa,” Renni piped up.
“Oh,” Erica looked disappointed by the answer. “Your sister?”
“My friend, actually,” I said grudgingly. “I was busy with a case last week.”
“Of course,” Erica nodded. “Being a single parent can’t be easy. I’m sure it helps having friends who pick up the slack.”
I cringed at the way she said it. I hated how inadequate she made me feel. Was I so insecure that it took a few stray words from someone I didn’t even like to get me all frazzled?
“I’ve got to get going, Erica,” I said, trying to cut the conversation short.
“Oh,” she said, looking disappointed. “Well, how about a play date soon with Renni and Donny? You and I can catch up while the kids play.”
I smiled tightly. “I’ll let you know.”
“Oh, okay…”
“See you later, Erica,” I said, steering Renni away from her.
I made sure that Renni’s seatbelt was fastened well before I got into the front seat and turned the engine on.
“Mommy?” Renni called, from the backseat.
“Yes, darling?” I asked.
“I drew a picture today at school,” she said. “You want to see?”
“Do I ever.” I nodded emphatically, as I turned around in my seat to face her.
She reached into her backpack and pulled out the small sketchpad that Vanessa had bought for her last birthday. Then she pulled out a loose piece of paper from inside it and handed it over to me.
Her picture showed our house complete with the old oak that sat out front. There was an inflatable pool in the front yard and we were standing around it in our swimsuits. I could make out Renni and myself easily, and I could recognize Vanessa from the white blonde of her hair, even though I didn’t understand why Renni had chosen to make her hair curly.
In the corner of the image, hovering just above our roof, there appeared to be a man with wings and a massive smile on his face.
I felt my chest grow a little tighter, but I kept the smile on my face. “You drew your dad?” I asked.
“He’s in heaven,” sheRenni replied. “That’s why he has wings.”
“Ah.”
“And, he’s watching over us,” Rennishe continued.
“I see that,” I nodded, swallowing the lump in my throat. I turned my attention back to her picture. “He bought you that inflatable pool when you were only six months old. You adored that thing. He had to inflate it at least twice a week when you got older.”
“It burst, though,” Rennishe said sadly.
“We used it till there were holes everywhere,” I smiled fondly at the memory. “He always said it was the best thing he ever bought you.”
“I want to show my picture to Aunt Vanessa,” Renni said.
“She’ll be thrilled to see a new picture,” I nodded, as I handed the picture back to her and started the drive to Vanessa’s house. “She loves your drawings.”
“I want to be an artist when I grow up,” she informed me. “Just like Aunt Vanessa.”
“Well, then I’m certain you will be,” I said. “Keep drawing.”
Ten minutes later, we pulled up outside Vanessa’s loft apartment. I carried Renni’s backpack in for her as she rushed to Vanessa’s door and knocked excitedly. A few moments later, the door opened and Vanessa bent to her knees immediately for a hug.
“Renni girl,” she cooed. “How’ve you been, little bunny?”
“Good,” Renni replied. “I drew a new picture today.”
“How exciting,” she crowed. “You must show me.”
As Renni proceeded to get out her drawing, Vanessa gave me a welcoming smile and closed the door behind us. “You look tired,” she said gently.
“It’s been a busy week,” I replied.
Vanessa didn’t exactly have a traditional living room. She had a low coffee table that was only a few inches from the ground, and instead of surrounding it with chairs or cushions, she had opted for beanbags. She and I collapsed onto two colorful beanbags, just as Renni presented Vanessa with her latest art work.
She didn’t comment right away. She took her time, as though she were really studying the image. I knew this was why Renni loved showing her work to Vanessa. It was because she felt truly considered, truly seen when she offered up something new to view.
“This is a very interesting drawing, Renni girl,” Vanessa nodded. “There are lots of interesting things here. First of all I must say that I love what you’ve done with my hair.”
“You said you always wanted curly hair,” Rennishe said.
“I did,” Vanessa nodded. “But my hair just refuses to curl. And, who’s this is the corner?”
“That’s Daddy,” Rennishe replied. “He’s in heaven, so he’s got wings.”
“Of course,” Vanessa nodded. “That’s a nice touch.”
“Guess what?” I asked.
“What?”
“Renni wants to be an artist like you when she grows up.”
“Is that so?” Vanessa asked, with raised eyebrows.
Renni gave her a shy smile and nodded.
“Wel
l, then you must never stop drawing,” Vanessa said firmly. “And you must never believe anyone who tells you that you’re not good. You hear me?”
RenniShe nodded seriously.
“Good. Now, I have a few snacks lying about. Are you hungry?”
“No.”
“Would you like to draw a little until you are?”
“Yes,” Rennishe nodded enthusiastically.
Vanessa got out a few pieces of clean white paper, along with pencils, crayons, colored pencils, and a number of other little things in a variety of different colors. “Go crazy,” she encouraged.
Renni settled down on the floor beside us and started drawing with vested interest. I smiled at the sight of her for a moment before I turned to Vanessa. “Thanks,” I mouthed to her.
Vanessa gave me a little wink. “How was work?”
“Long,” I admitted. “We’re making progress, though… It’s just slow progress.”
“You’ll be able to get him exonerated though, right?”
“Mommy’s still working on it,” Renni piped up unexpectedly. “These things take time.”
I laughed. “That’s right,” I nodded. “These things do take time.”
Vanessa shook her head at my daughter and turned to me. “She’s a sharp one.”
“She takes after her father,” I said, trying not to let the memory of Clint dampen my mood. “Are you all set for tomorrow night?”
“Pretty much,” Vanessa nodded. “I’m debuting a whole new collection, so that part is always scary. But I’m hoping for a successful showing.”
“I’ve seen this collection, Vanessa,” I said. “It’s breathtaking.”
“I hope the critics feel the same way.”
“If they have any taste at all, they will,” I said confidently.
“Mia?”
“Yes?”
“You look a little…” Vanessa glanced at Renni and then toward me. “Pale.”
“Mommy’s always pale,” Renni said, without looking up from her drawing.
“You’re right,” Vanessa smiled. “But I know what can help with that: some wine. Mia, why don’t we go into the kitchen and get out two glasses.”
We left Renni in the living room and moved toward the kitchen where we could talk privately. I sat along the kitchen counter on one of Vanessa’s swivelling bar stools so that I could see Renni from my vantage point.